Nothing—or no one—was coming between us ever again.
“What are you doing?” Rose said, tucking the blanket up under her chin, as if she was suddenly shy.
I couldn’t help smiling and shaking my head in amusement. She was so sweet. I’d already seen every inch of her—and now she was going to hold out, like a prim and proper girl?
I don’t think so...
I bent down and kissed her lips softly, like a butterfly landing on a flower. Just when her mouth began to open and her hands got behind my head, I pulled away laughing.
“Golly, didn’t you get enough of that last night?”
She pouted back at me, settling onto her pillow.
“Not really—you know, my aunt and uncle don’t get back until tomorrow morning sometime. Which means you and I have a whole day together.” She smiled seductively at me, and I almost climbed back into bed.
Instead, I got up and began pacing the small space. I only half noticed the light greens and pinks of the room, even though I focused on the drapes and upholstery, trying desperately not to look at Rose.
“Rose, we need to be talking, not...doing other stuff right now.”
“Aww.”
I risked a serious face in her direction. “I mean it. This is too important to play around with.”
She sat up, taking the covers with her, thank God. “What?”
Had she lost some brain cells during our separation? I waved out my hands. “This, us. What we’re going to do.”
Seeing her retain the flirty look, not really paying me much mind, I rolled on. “I heard you have a new boyfriend. What about him? Huh? Have you been warming him up at night, too?”
I don’t know where the words came from, but when I let them fly, a stormy cloud erased all signs of friendliness on Rose’s features.
I’d just gone too far.
“If you’re too stupid to know that you were the first guy I ever did it with, then it’s your problem,” Rose shouted.
I crossed the room and grabbed her shoulders, hating the look of hurt I’d put into her beautiful eyes.
“I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry. I know it was your first time. Even without the evidence on the sheet, I’d know it.”
Her eyes were still narrowed, threateningly. “Then why say it?”
“Because I’m jealous, I want you all to myself—like before. I want to marry you and have children with you. But...you might not feel the same way about me anymore.”
I searched her face, which had softened, although the look of concentration there scared the hell out of me.
“Rose, will you still be my wife?”
She bubbled with laughter and flung her arms around me, forgetting the blanket. I struggled to hug her and pull the material up around her.
“I never stopped loving you. And, I think I proved that I wanted you several times last night....” My face flushed and I had to look away. “But what about your life? Summer said you were pretty serious about some new Amish girl. What’s that all about?”
Her voice held the same jealous tilt that I was sure mine had. We were both in the same boat—neither one of us could stand the idea of the other being with someone else.
Because we weren’t supposed to be—God wanted us together.
I breathed out. I had to be honest with Rose from the get-go. No more lies between us.
“It’s worse than that. I, uh, well...asked her to marry me.” I struggled with the words and then watched her face drop in disbelief.
She tried to shake me away, but I held her firmly. “You’ve got to understand that I thought you had moved on—and that we weren’t ever going to be together.”
“But to go out and propose to another girl in just a few months—that’s insane,” she shrieked, but stopped her struggling to continue staring at me with a gap-mouthed expression.
“It’s different for us. You already know that. Us Amish, marry young. We don’t shack up and live in sin for years before taking the chance on a relationship.”
She set her mouth tight and scrunched her eyes, saying, “So you think it’s better to run off and marry a girl you don’t really love just to have sex?”
How she managed to turn everything around was beyond me. “It’s not like that at all. I was lonely and angry. I was willing to get together with Constance to help me forget about you.”
“So, Constance is her name, huh?” The focused wrath that was shooting from her eyes startled me.
I pulled Rose’s face only inches from mine and said, “You are the only woman that I have ever loved—or will love—ever. I’ll forget about your relationship with the football player, if you can erase mine with Constance from your head.”
“But I’m not engaged to Hunter,” she shouted.
“Like I said, you English do things different. But at least I didn’t marry her.”
She quieted for a minute. I was too afraid to say anything that might get her riled again. I really didn’t enjoy fighting with her, but the alternative, with her all naked and us alone was something I was trying to avoid.
“Okay, I see where you’re coming from. What are you going to do about this chick?”
I gathered my wits and said, “The same thing that you’re going to do with your boyfriend. Break up as nicely as possible, and right away. I don’t want that jerk coming around you any more than you want me spending time with Constance.”
“Hunter is not a jerk. He helped me out when I was devastated over you,” she said firmly, but with less venom than earlier.
A powerful wave of hatred toward the guy crashed over me. I would not share Rose with anyone.
I said in a low voice that meant business, “I will not tolerate you continuing a friendship with this man. You have a choice to make. It’s either me or him.”
Something passed over her features that stilled my heart. She had feelings for the guy, I was sure of it. Even though I had proposed to Constance, I had no serious connection to her—other than respecting her for being a good woman.
“Noah, you’re the one I love and want to be with. It’s just going to be a little difficult telling Hunter. He’s going to be shocked, and I don’t want to hurt him,” she said softly.
“And you don’t think that Constance is going to be heartbroken? She’s been planning a wedding, for God’s sake. Think about what I’m going to have to deal with.”
I could see it written on her gorgeous face that she didn’t really care much about Constance’s feelings. Rose was the love of my life, but she was also not the type of girl to give another female any leeway with her man.
Before she got the chance to answer me, the beep, beep of a car horn made us both jump. I moved to the window and pulled the curtain aside just enough to see the work truck at the curb.
“Who is it?” Rose squeaked as she leaped out of the bed with the blanket wrapped around her as if she were in a cocoon.
When the bell rang, I knew he was already at the door.
“It’s Mr. Denton,” I said with more calm than I was feeling.
“What arrangements did you make with him?” Rose disappeared into the closet, and I watched her shoot the blanket out. The thought of her bouncing around in there, trying to get her clothes on in a rush, totally distracted me for a few seconds.
“Ah...I told him just to leave me here until...I called him,” I stammered out.
Rose’s voice came through the closet door at the same time the bell rang again. “Do your parents know you came here?”
“No.”
She finally popped out from behind the door with her hands fumbling on her zipper and her face as white as a ghost.
“They’re going to kill you.” She pinched her hair, pulling it back in anxiety, and said, “And, they’re going to hate me forever. I thought... Well, I didn’t really think much about it last night, but didn’t you have a plan? Some story about going to visit relatives in Iowa or something?”
I crossed the room to her, wanting to soothe
the crazed expression from her face. “Indiana, not Iowa—I don’t have any kin that I know of in Iowa.”
I got her in my arms and held her tightly. She rested her face against my chest, and I swear I could feel the hammering of her heart through our clothes and skin.
“It’s going to be all right. We’re together now and that’s all that matters.” I lifted her chin and looked down at her. I wanted to reassure her that everything would be okay—even though I knew we still had a difficult road ahead of us.
“I’m going to have to go home with Mr. Denton. The poor guy probably rented a room last night—honestly, I forgot all about him. I imagine Dad’s been calling the old guy’s cell phone all night.
“So here’s what we’re going to do—just listen to me. I’m going to talk to Father and Mother and tell them what your family did to us. I believe that they will support us getting back together under the circumstances that we were torn apart. I plan to explain things to Constance as soon as possible.” I took a breath and continued. “I want you to give me your new cell phone number, and I’ll call you tonight. In the meantime, you need to break up with that je...guy right away. All right?”
Rose’s little face looked frightened, and I couldn’t help myself from bending down and spreading her lips with my own. God, she tasted so good.
The bell ringing again made her mumble into my mouth, “Uh-huh.”
I hated leaving her again, but I had issues to resolve at home before we could finally begin our life together.
As I held Rose’s body against mine, one thing was for sure, though—I would never allow her to be taken from me again.
33
Rose
I sat on the bed feeling more alone ever before. Flopping over, I buried my face in the pillow, breathing in Noah’s scent that lingered on the material.
A smile played on my lips as I thought about the night before. It had been more than perfect. Besides a couple of awkward moments, everything had been just as I’d dreamed it would be—only better.
Sighing, I hugged the pillow, wishing it was Noah. It might be days or even weeks before I saw him again. I missed him already, and he’d only been gone a few minutes. Now that he was back in my life, what would I do without him?
The blissful sensations my body was experiencing could only last so long. Already, angry thoughts were trickling into my mind about Dad and Sam—and Constance. I wasn’t sure how to deal with Dad. The fact that he’d actually corrupt my little brother into committing forgery and lying about it was incredible. Obviously, he was serious about me not being Amish.
What would he do when I told him I was marrying Noah?
Probably disown me.
Sam was easy. I’d punch him the next time I saw him. Although my anger toward him was not raging the way it was with Dad—at least he’d come through in the end and ’fessed up. I figured Summer had something to do with it.
Scattering my thoughts, I decided I would have to call Summer to tell her about me and Noah. She would probably be upset with me, but then again, I doubted she’d be able to hold out much longer with Sam putting the charm on thick.
Then there was this new Amish girl I hadn’t even met.
What was Constance like?
Summer had said that she’d heard the girl was pretty, but shy. Since the Amish didn’t like broadcasting their wedding dates early, I understood why Summer hadn’t heard that news yet. Or maybe if she had, she’d been reluctant to tell me, the good friend that she was.
Constance didn’t really much matter as long as Noah dumped her butt in a hurry. Still, it would be pretty uncomfortable at the church gatherings being around her, that’s for sure.
Thoughts of dumping brought Hunter to mind. I really didn’t want to hurt him. He’d been so patient with me. And there were other things, like the way we related to each other and the fact that we could hang out together without a chaperone. I’d gotten used to going to the movies and concerts with him, doing all the normal stuff that teenagers did with their boyfriends. I could be myself with Hunter, literally let my hair down, and be me.
Not so much with Noah. Did all those things matter when you loved a guy?
I rolled over and stared at the ceiling, sighing to the empty room. Could a girl love two guys at once? I knew I loved Noah—with all my heart. But I definitely felt something for Hunter, too; what, I wasn’t sure, but something.
Just as I was reaching for the phone to call Summer, hoping that she’d be awake at nine o’clock on a Saturday morning, the phone rang, shocking my heart for a second, until I saw the name—Hunter.
I stared at the phone while a battle took place inside of me. Should I answer it or let him leave a message?
The next ring got me, and even though I was slammed with guilt about Noah, I picked it up and said, “Hey.”
“Hey, baby, how ya doing?” Hunter’s voice was upbeat and fresh, as if it were the spring air pressing against the window.
My voice froze in my throat. At that moment, I knew what I had to do. The love I had for Noah was all-consuming. I couldn’t walk away from him if he wanted me.
I had to be with Noah.
Forcing my voice out, I said, “I’m okay. What about you?”
“What’s wrong? You sound funny. Are you really all right?” Hunter’s tone had changed instantly. I couldn’t pretend for long with him—he knew me too well.
“Uh, I’m having a problem...that I need to talk to you about.”
I hated this part. It would kill me to do this to him.
“Do you want me come over? I will. I’ll leave right now and be there before noon.”
Even in my tattered state, I had to smile. He knew that my aunt and uncle were gone for the weekend and that a visit from him was off-limits.
“You know that would be against the law,” I said, loosening up a bit.
“I could sneak in and out without anyone the wiser. I wouldn’t expect anything—you know—physical, or anything like that. We could just hang out and watch a movie or something. I hate that you’re there all alone.”
I didn’t know if it was the concern in his voice or his words that made me feel as if I were about to cry. He was worried about my virtue—and it was all gone now, given away to another guy.
Hunter pressed. “Well, what do you think?”
“You can’t do that, Hunter. I, ah, have Amanda and Brittany coming over, so I won’t be alone. Don’t worry about me. I’m fine.”
“No, there’s something up. I can hear it in your voice. You’re upset. Why?”
I tossed the die in my head and went with it. “Noah came to visit last night.”
I popped the words out quickly, before I could change my mind.
There was silence, horrible silence for a minute, and then he said, “What did he want?”
I took a deep breath and plunged in. “Dad and Sam set us up, Hunter. They faked a note, had Justin write it, and said that it was from me. Noah thought that I didn’t want to be Amish, that I didn’t want him.” I rambled on like a mad woman. “That’s why he never contacted me or called. That’s why he hooked up with the Amish chick and got engaged.”
“Does this mean everything has changed for you? Are you going back to him, Rose? Is that what you want?”
Hunter’s voice was more combative than I’d expected, making it easier to be tough on him.
“I’m sorry, but I never stopped loving him.”
“He’s not right for you. You will regret it, if you go back to him. You will be making a huge mistake with your life,” Hunter said with a certainty that bugged me. He sounded like Dad or Sam. I was tired of people telling me what was good or bad for my life. It was my life.
“Look, I like you a lot, but I can’t deny my feelings for Noah. I can’t change that I love him.”
I heard him snort into the phone, and when he did speak, anger was drizzled into his words. “When I told you that I loved you, I meant it. I wasn’t fooling around, playing games with you. You
won’t be happy with Noah in the end—that I’m sure of. But if you have to go and ruin your life, I won’t stop you, because unfortunately, you need to learn this the hard way. I’ll be waiting for you when you change your mind.”
Then he hung up.
I looked at the phone, shocked. I knew he wouldn’t be thrilled with the news, but I never imagined that he’d be so upset about it.
I rolled up tight into a ball and began to cry. I had Noah back, and Hunter didn’t mean that much to me—so why did I feel terrible, as if my guts were being pulled apart?
The feeling of having forgotten something trickled into my mind slowly and then hit me with the force of a train. I bounced out of bed, racing for the door.
I was scheduled to work at the clinic that morning. Even if I’d left ten minutes ago, I’d still be late.
My crazy soap opera life was going to get me fired.
Running out the front door, I decided that I didn’t have time to slow down to lock it. Noah was way too paranoid. Who would wander into a house in a nice tract like this in broad daylight?
I tried to slow my movements down as I backed out of the driveway. The last thing I needed was a speeding ticket.
Taking a deep breath, I put on my game face. At least a day at the clinic might help me forget about my problems, for a while, anyway.
I only half noticed the older model, dark Monte Carlo parked across from the house. Something about it struck me as odd, making me look in the rearview mirror at the car.
Strange...I’d never seen that car before. I slowed my truck down and thought about turning around, but only for a second. I didn’t have time to go back. The creepy feeling left me as I got farther away from the car.
Turning on the radio, I forgot the car and focused on my driving—and the faces of Noah and Hunter.
34
Noah
Father’s head hung like he’d been shot in the chest. Mother was standing at the kitchen sink, her hands braced on the ceramic, her eyes focused on the drain.
It wasn’t that bad. You’d think I’d just told them someone had died.
Belonging Page 33
