by M. J. O'Shea
“You know where I work?”
Zack smiled. “Yeah, I do. Lisa was… informative.”
I groaned, not wanting to know what she’d chosen to tell him, and dragged myself up to get dressed.
The walk down the stairs to the street was slow. Painful wasn’t even a sufficient word for the agony that ripped through me at every small movement. Zack draped my arm around his shoulders and hailed a cab. I tried to protest, but he told me there was no way I was walking the mile or so to the shop and to not even think of arguing with him.
I wanted so badly to grill Zack, to figure out what was wrong with me and what he knew about wolf-boy, but I didn’t get the chance. He pulled out his phone the minute we were secured in the cab. Evasive tactics if I ever saw them.
“Babe? It’s me.” He smiled at whatever was said on the other side of the phone, his face softening like I’d never seen before. “Listen, you were right after all. I’ve got Miles. He looks just as bad, if not worse. Get PC’s stubborn ass down to Village Books. I don’t care if you have to hog-tie him. This can’t continue.” I opened my mouth to start with the questions, but Zack held his hand up. “… Okay, we’ll be there in ten minutes. I love you too.” He closed his phone and stuck it back in the pocket of his jeans.
“What’s going on, Zack? Who’s PC?”
He smiled again, annoyingly uninformative.
“I think you’ll have no problem recognizing him.”
I let it drop and concentrated instead on holding my stomach and trying not to keel over.
RALPH WAS horrified when I walked in the door of the bookstore―hobbled was more like it. I was leaned over like an old man with Zack next to me, halfway holding me up.
“Oh my God, Miles. I had no idea it was this bad! I would’ve never asked you to come in. You need to go home, son. Megan called in sick too. There must be some flu going around.”
Flu, my ass. There was a huge concert at Madison Square Garden that night. That was my best guess as to where poor sick Megan was. I was relieved she wasn’t there. Her bitchy attitude was the last thing I felt like dealing with.
“It’s okay, Ralph. I’m here now so I may as well stay. This is my friend, Zack. He’s been helping me out. He’s going to stay with me tonight.” I didn’t know if that was true, but I wanted to get Ralph to go home so I could collapse in peace. Besides, I had a feeling something was going to happen in a few minutes that Ralph didn’t need to see.
It took a bit of convincing, mostly on Zack’s part, but we finally got my concerned boss to agree to go home. As soon as he walked out, I did in fact sink not very gracefully onto the stool behind the counter. I put my head down on the cool laminate and concentrated on breathing. Zack seemed like he was planning on staying, maybe even like he was starting to be a friend. It was hard to say. After the past hour or so, he wasn’t just a teacher type anymore, or even the intimidating dreamboat he’d once been. That was for sure. But who was he? I was starting to think I didn’t have the first clue.
“Are you going to tell me what’s going on now?” I barely had the energy to whisper.
“I know him.” He said it so quietly it was hard to hear.
“You know my wolf? Is that who you were talking about on the phone? Is PC his name?”
Zack nodded. “Yeah, PC’s his name. He’s one of my best friends. We had no idea what was wrong with him at first. I didn’t start to put the pieces together until you turned up sick too. There were just too many coincidences.”
“Too many coincidences for what? What’s happening to me?”
“It’s happening to both of you. It’s because you’re apart. You’ll feel better when he gets here, I promise. At least I’m 99 percent sure you will.”
Every cell in my body knew Zack was right. Just the thought of seeing the wolf boy made me feel a little bit better. “How do you know this stuff? Who are you?”
“I’m Zack and I’m trying to help you. Let’s just leave it there for now. What’s important is getting you better.”
I started to protest his continued evasions, but just then the chime over the door rang. I lifted my head to see two figures walking in the door. One was blond, pale and ethereal; I noticed fleetingly that he had to be one of the most beautiful people I’d ever seen―but honestly, other than that first impression, I barely even saw him. All I really cared about was the guy who he had propped up, slowly walking hunched over. It was him. My wolf. He looked even more awful than I felt. Well, more awful than I had been feeling. The pain was going away, draining off me like a bad memory. I don’t know how to describe it other than to say as soon as he was in the same room as me, I felt noticeably… better.
I stood and walked around the counter, just as I had a few nights before. He sped up and walked toward me, closing the distance until we were wrapped up tightly in each other’s arms.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered.
I didn’t reply. I was too busy breathing him in, feeling the pain slide completely away until I felt like I had the other night. Perfect. He drew slightly away and brushed his lips over mine. The memory of our first kiss slammed me over the head hard and fast. Suddenly I could barely breathe.
“I wouldn’t have stayed away if I knew it was affecting you too. I thought it was just me because of what I am.”
I nodded wordlessly and pulled him close once again, unable to talk and not ready to be separated even by an inch. Over his shoulder, I noticed Zack and the beautiful blond guy standing hand in hand, smiling. I finally drew away but trailed my own hands down his arms until I could tangle our fingers together. The need to touch him was so strong. I knew instinctively that it would probably hurt a little if I let go.
“My name is Miles, by the way. We never even met the other night. Well, not really―sorry about that.” I turned red.
“I’m PC and don’t apologize. You didn’t understand what was happening to us any more than I did.” He detached one of his hands from mine and brushed a thumb across my cheek. “It’s nice to meet you, finally.” I laughed shakily when he gave me a trembly smile and shook his head. “I can’t believe this. I never would have chosen it for either of us. I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am.”
Never would have chosen what?
“Is someone going to finally tell me what on earth is happening to us?” I saw Zack and his boyfriend exchange glances with PC.
“Who wants to start?” asked the beautiful blond one.
“I think maybe I should. Let’s go sit.” PC gestured to one of the café tables we had set up in the middle of the shop. “First of all, this is Noah, one of my best friends, and I guess you know Zack, another of my close friends. I can’t believe how small this city is.” PC shook his head quietly.
“Hi, Miles.” Noah smiled, sticking out his hand. I shook it, feeling bemused.
It was interesting to see Zack with him. I’d known that Zack had a boyfriend, but to watch them together, to see how close they were, made my stomach heat. It was almost like if they weren’t touching, it was painful. Noah had his arm slung across the back of Zack’s chair, his hand cupped possessively around Zack’s shoulder. Zack rested his palm on Noah’s knee and looked over at him with a smile every few minutes. I was envious of their intimacy.
PC was touching me too, though. The second we’d sat down, he reached over and pulled my hand into his lap and curled it around his thigh, like he’d done it a thousand times before. And even if he hadn’t touched me, I would have reached over and initiated the contact. I needed it. We both did. Whatever was going on between us made touching imperative. But I could tell it wasn’t something he was used to. Maybe it was a leftover impression from the first night, but he seemed a little bit like a wild animal to me, skittish, maybe uncomfortable in close quarters. And after the past three days of living hell, I didn’t want to think about what would happen were he to run away from me again. His touch made me feel worlds better. I made sure I had a secure grip on his hand.
�
��So, you have to know what I am, right?” PC turned to me.
“Well, I know you were the wolf, and you’re you, but what’s the name for it? Are you… a werewolf?” I couldn’t believe that word had just come out of my mouth with even a drop of sincerity. It was nuts. It was undeniably real. I had no choice but to deal with it.
PC gave me an ironic smile.
“That’s your one get-out-of-jail-free card, since you didn’t know.” He squeezed my hand. “I’m a lycan, not a werewolf. It’s different.”
“How? I’ve always heard the two used interchangeably.”
“By morons,” he muttered. “Werewolves are the traditional full-moon rabid-dog types. They can’t control it; they can’t stop it. You don’t want to be anywhere near one of them when they’re shifted if you can help it. Lycans are more like what you would call a shape-shifter. We can change when we want. The only time it happens accidentally is when we’re angry. And when we’re in our wolf form, we are mostly rational. We feel animal impulses all the time, but we can control them. Sometimes more easily than others.”
Zack and Noah chuckled. I imagined they had both been on the receiving end of one of his not-so-controlled moments.
“Oh,” I muttered. What else was I supposed to say? “And when did you get… turned into a lycan?”
“Never. I was born one. My mom comes from a very old family of lycans. Dad’s human—well. At least he was born that way. I didn’t start shifting until I was eighteen, though. Late bloomer.”
“Wait, how old are you now?” I’d assumed he was young. Honestly, sixteen would have been pushing it.
“Almost nineteen.” My mouth dropped open. How was that even possible? PC’s mouth tipped in a wry grin at my obvious shock. “Uh, I stopped aging when I started to shift. We all do. So physically, I’m still a very twerpy-looking seventeen.”
“And mentally he’s thirteen,” Zack muttered. PC reached across the table to shove him and they both laughed.
I breathed a sigh of relief. “You have no idea how many times I gave myself the cradle-robbing speech the other night when I couldn’t stop looking at you.”
“Like you can talk. How old are you?”
“Eighteen. I’m in Zack’s freshman writing seminar, remember?”
Zack rolled his eyes. “I wish it was mine. Hawthorne’s kind of a bastard, isn’t he?”
I nodded. “Genius, but a bastard. So what’s your deal? How come you know PC?” I reddened when I realized it might not be my business.
“I’ve been friends with PC for about a year now. I introduced him to Zack.” It was the first time Noah had spoken since we first sat down. I liked the kindness in his voice. He seemed so gentle.
“And are you a―?” I still had a hard time saying the word out loud, but I was sure they knew what I meant.
PC snickered. “Yeah, right. He wishes.”
I’d thought he probably wasn’t anyway. He didn’t have that untamed look in his eyes, and they were bright blue instead of gold.
“Neither one of us are lycans,” Noah answered without the joking sarcasm that seemed to be PC’s usual tone. Noah looked at Zack. They seemed to be having a very involved conversation but weren’t saying a single word.
“They do this,” PC stage whispered. “It’s kind of nauseating.”
“We were trying to decide if it was the right time to tell Miles the rest of it.” Zack rolled his eyes at PC.
I looked at them expectantly. “And I hope since you just said that out loud, the answer was yes.”
They gave each other another silent look. Then Noah nodded.
“You’re going to have to take a few things on faith here. You already believe that PC is what he is. You saw it for yourself.” I nodded, since there really was no denying it. “Well, I’m eighteen,” he began with a smile. “But physically, I’m barely seventeen. And like PC, I will be for the rest of my life.”
“But I thought you just said you weren’t like PC.”
“I said I wasn’t a lycan. And I’m not. But I am immortal. I’m a vampire, Miles. And so is Zack.”
My jaw dropped again. Impossible. I looked at Zack and he nodded. PC pulled me closer to him. He must have been able to feel me freaking out.
“You’re really a vampire?” My voice sounded weak, shocked.
“Yeah, it’s true. I know that’s pretty hard to swallow. We could prove it if you want to watch, but you’ve had a long day. Another time might be better.” Zack gave me an understanding look.
“How long have you―?” I couldn’t even spit out a whole sentence.
“Noah was turned a year ago by a rogue vampire who was trying to kill him. I was turned in August. By Noah.”
I swallowed audibly. “Why?”
“Because I wanted to be with him forever. It was an easy choice.”
I nodded. I could tell by the way they looked at each other that it would be. My questions still weren’t over, though.
“So you two are vampires, PC’s a lycan, and I’m just a kid who works in a bookstore.”
“And writes amazing stories,” Zack interjected. I grinned at him for a second.
“That still doesn’t explain what’s happening between us. I mean, why were we so sick?”
“Noah has a theory,” Zack murmured.
PC looked very uncomfortable. “A theory that I hate,” he mumbled.
“It’s something that we didn’t even know was real,” Noah interjected.
“I’ve never heard of it happening, other than in stories,” PC told me. “And I know a lot of lycans.”
“What is it?” Is there something wrong with me?
“Have you heard of imprinting?” I looked at Noah in silence for a few seconds, then guffawed.
“You mean like werewolf imprinting, like in the stories? Where the wolf and the human are connected by some invisible magical bond and nobody can change it?” It sounded ridiculous, but then, what part of my recent experiences wouldn’t sound ridiculous to an outsider? “Is that real?”
“Lycan,” PC grumbled. “And no, it’s just stories”
“Sorry. I forgot.”
“It’s okay,” he answered, his face melting into a soft smile. Then he leaned over and dropped a casual kiss on my shoulder.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Zack pinch Noah. They exchanged quiet grins. I figured the gesture must be completely out of character for PC. That “I have to escape from here” vibe was flooding constantly into me through the place where we were touching. He wanted to run so badly. The softness I saw in his face had to be new for someone like him.
“I think PC’s wrong,” Noah countered. “Everything you guys are going through would be considered classic signs of imprinting. The instant helpless attraction, the need to touch each other, and PC told me that he sensed you being in danger before he even knew you existed. The way he wants to run like a bat out of hell but can’t stand to let go of your hand long enough to do it.” He glanced pointedly at PC, who shrugged, grudgingly acknowledging Noah was right. “The biggest clue was the physical pain when you’re apart. For me, that one was the closer. It can’t be anything else. Everything lines up too perfectly.”
“But it doesn’t exist!” PC’s voice was a little desperate.
“Humor me. Miles, let go of his hand for a second.”
I hesitated, not wanting to lose contact, but I figured we needed to know for sure. So I let go, and right away I felt… not as good. It wasn’t crippling pain, like when he ran away, but it wasn’t comfortable by any definition. I wanted it to be over. Without thinking, I reached for his hand again, he leaned closer instinctively, and in an instant I felt way better. He groaned softly. No one needed to say a word. So, bottom line, I’d only feel okay if I was glued to PC’s side and he’d only be okay if he was touching me too. How was I supposed to live like that? How was he?
“How did this happen?” I had a long list of “hows” but that one slipped out first.
“We have no idea.
Until I started researching PC’s symptoms, the idea that imprinting was real would’ve never crossed my mind.” Noah looked apologetic.
“So you don’t know how it happened, and I’m assuming you don’t know how to get rid of it. This situation is impossible,” I mumbled.
“No kidding,” PC agreed. “It’s the last thing either of us need. We’re going to have to contact my mother. See if there’s some way to break it―if imprinting really even exists and this isn’t just some other screwed-up mess.”
It stung when he said that, which caught me off guard. I’d just said the situation sucked, and I meant it. My mind agreed with him wholeheartedly… but when we were touching, my body didn’t want anything more than to be near him. And the need was getting stronger. I closed my eyes and squeezed them together, trying to fight instinct with reason. Reason was starting to lose.
I saw Zack give me a thoughtful look. I looked away, not wanting him or anyone else to see what was most likely written on my face.
“Until PC talks to his mother, you two really can’t be apart. We’ve seen what happens.”
“So he stays here with me while I work, but what about tonight?” I could feel myself flush.
“Your place will be quieter.”
Great. My place. “It’s just the dorms. Not very nice.”
“That’s okay. Believe me, you don’t want my roommates to get in the middle of this. They’re both nosy and female and would like nothing more than to tease the hell out of me and, by association, you too.”
I knew I didn’t feel like dealing with the ribbing, good-natured or not. The past few days had been long enough, and I was ready for quiet.
“Okay, my place it is.”
Chapter 5: Bonded
AFTER OUR talk was over, Zack and Noah left for home and I had to get to work. It was interesting trying to get work done with PC in the bookstore. Like the first night, but even worse since instead of just watching him, my body wanted to be touching his all the time. The discomfort when we weren’t touching wasn’t as bad as it had been earlier. It seemed like as soon as my body realized he wasn’t running away again, it became more comfortable with giving him a longer leash, so to speak. That’s not to say that my fingers didn’t seek his out the second they weren’t busy, because they did, and we were nearly caught kissing a few times by customers because it felt so good to be in each other’s arms.
