by M. D. Laird
“If I don’t like something then I will say so,” she said calmly.
“You’re going to be a piece of work,” he grumbled. “If you must know, Tamiel has never been whipped, and I have only ever had a handful of my demons whipped, the last was a thousand years or so ago. They follow orders when they don’t have someone corrupting them.”
“Are they not allowed their own minds?” she asked defiantly.
“Are you going to question everything?” He growled.
“Only if I see injustice.”
“What injustice?” He snarled. “What evidence have you seen that I mistreat my men? You have seen none. They are well-fed, well-clothed and well-paid, and as long as they carry out their decree, they are mostly free to do as they please in their own time. However, there are rules, and one of those rules is that they follow the orders of their prince. If you don’t like that, then take it up with High Prince Asmodeus. No, take it up with Heaven.”
“I’ve offended you,” she said. “I’m sorry, Calab.”
“IT’S PRINCE CALAB.” He roared with such menace that she dropped her fork and shrank away from him.
I’ve angered him. I am a guest in his house—in his world—and I am judging him.
“I’m sorry,” he muttered. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
“I should be sorry,” she said, straightening in her seat. “I’m making judgements, and I shouldn’t be.”
He pushed his plate forward. “Are you going to finish your meal?” he asked.
“I’m done,” she said. She had lost her appetite.
“Then I’ll say goodnight.” He stood and headed towards the door.
“Prince Calab,” she said, and he stopped and turned around. “What will the alchemists do to me if they find me?”
“They won’t find you,” he said and then he turned and left.
That night her dreams were unsettling. She was being consumed by a black void. The Imperator and his unknown terror had come for her. Her room was filled with demons, and she was being shaken awake before she realised she was screaming. She sat up on the bed and panted, her sheets and nightdress were soaked from sweat. Calab entered the room.
“What is going on?” he asked his men sternly.
“I had a nightmare,” said Eve, blushing furiously, at least, she would have been if her skin had not been deathly pale.
He looked at her and frowned before shaking his head. He addressed his men, “Return to your posts.” His eyes settled on Eve, and he said impatiently, “You have disturbed the entire guild, anyone spying could have also heard you.”
“I’m sorry. I can’t help it.”
“Yes you can,” he snapped. “You can stop bothering yourself with thoughts of the Imperium. I have told you the alliance will deal with them, and we will keep you safe. That should be enough.”
“It’s not that simple. All of this uncertainty is unnerving.”
“You’re being histrionic.” He snarled. “Just go to sleep.”
He stalked out of her room and left her feeling irritated. She showered to remove the cold sweat that was clinging to her skin and put on fresh nightclothes. She laid on the opposite side of the bed where the sheets were still dry and tried to calm her mind for sleep. An easy sleep would not come. Each time she tried to drift off, she could see the void of the unknown coming towards her once more. She gave up and read until she was too exhausted to notice that sleep had taken her.
The same dream haunted her the following night. She was once again shaken awake by her demon guard to find herself in a cold sweat, and her room filled with demons. Calab was furious.
“We cannot have this every night. From tomorrow, you can sleep in the dungeon where you won’t disturb anyone.” He ordered his men to resume their posts and left.
The following evening Eve was sat on her bed reading when a knock came to her door. She opened it to find her night guard standing there.
“Apologies for the interruption, Lady,” he said. “Let me know when you are ready for sleep, and I will escort you downstairs.”
“What?” exclaimed Eve. “To the dungeon? He was serious?” The guard nodded, and she felt her skin prickle with rage. “I will not go,” she snapped defiantly.
“It will be easier for you if you go willingly.”
“Are you under orders to make me go if I refuse?” she demanded. The guard nodded, Eve wanted to scream out in anger. “Can you please take me to Prince Calab? I want to see him at once.” She spoke as calmly as she could to force herself not to scream the demand in the guard’s face.
“He is on decree, he’s not at the guild.”
“Fine,” she snapped, marching past the guard and down the hallway. “If this is how he wants to treat me, I will make sure he regrets it when I am queen.”
The guard led her to the dungeon. It was as dark and as scary as she imagined it would be. She passed a row of dingy, dirty cells with filthy rags instead of a bed and growled inwardly,
He is going to pay for this.
“Don’t touch the walls,” the guard warned her as he led her towards the end of the row to her cell, “they are made of adamantine, and they burn flesh. Your cell has been panelled, so the walls are safe to touch.”
She had no idea what adamantine was and was in no mood to ask, but a glance at the walls told her that whatever adamantine was, it was not of Anaxagoras. The guard stopped at her cell. It had been spotlessly cleaned, and the wooden panelled walls had been freshly painted white. The cell also housed a comfortable looking bed, side table, lamp, rug, and was being warmed by an electric heater. A stack of books had been placed on the bedside table. They were beautiful editions of William Blake’s works, and a note lay on top of them.
I dreamt a dream! What can it mean?
And that I was a maiden Queen
Guarded by an Angel a Demon mild:
Witless woe was ne'er beguiled!
For you to keep. Don’t be angry.
Prince Calab
Despite her irritation, she smiled.
He’s still put me in a dungeon, and I am still mad at him.
The guard closed the door, and she was relieved to find he did not lock it. She sighed, settled into the bed and began to read.
Calab had risen early and dressed in his usual black shirt, coat and trousers. He wondered how the girl had slept in the dungeon. He supposed she had been annoyed with him when she realised he had not been bluffing. He left his quarters and headed to the dungeon. The night guards were still on duty and Tausa, her personal guard, was at his post outside her door.
“My Prince,” he said and bowed towards Calab.
“Is she asleep?”
“Yes, Highness. She has had another restless night.”
Calab nodded. “Was she angry to be brought here?”
“Furious, Highness,” replied Tausa. “She said she will make you regret it once she becomes queen.”
Calab grinned. “I’m sure she will. Bring her to my quarters when she is ready for breakfast.”
It was lunchtime when the girl entered his quarters. The look she gave him was a good indication that she was indeed still angry with him.
He smiled. “Good afternoon.” He received a scowl in reply. “I was waiting to order breakfast but, as you’re so late, I will order our lunch instead.” He gave his request to Turel, her day guard, and invited her to sit on his sofa. “Did you manage any restful sleep?”
She shrugged. “I suppose so. I imagine you did while I was locked away in your dungeon where no one can hear me scream.”
He laughed at her petulance and received another glare from her. “Oh, come on. You must see that it is more practical?”
“Did it ever occur to you that I might just need someone to talk to?” she snapped.
Calab frowned. Not the ‘T’ word.
She glowered at him and continued, “You hardly ever visit me, and no one else talks to me.”
What is she talking about?
“I have visited you on many occasions,” he replied.
“I’ve hardly seen anyone; I have practically been on my own since I got here.”
Humans are so dramatic.
He sighed. “You have only been here for three weeks.”
“It feels like an eternity,” she simpered. “I hate it here. Can I not go somewhere else? An angel guild perhaps?”
That bothered him more than it should have. “Why do you hate it?” he asked. “Have we not given you every comfort?”
She pouted at him. “You have, but I’m lonely.”
Calab felt annoyance ripple through him. Did she really expect him to keep her entertained? He had important matters of the future and security of the continent to attend to, and she was complaining because she has no one to talk to every second of every day. He looked at her face, it had lost the brightness it had had a few weeks ago. When she had spoken to him, her eyes had shined and the upwards turn of her mouth, when she spoke passionately about her books, had been delightful. He supposed he missed that. He could not talk to her like that again. He did not like what it stirred in him.
“What do you want me to do?” he asked.
“Talk to me,” she answered. “I’m frightened, I don’t know what is going on, and I have loads of time to worry about everything.”
“So, don’t then. Worry I mean.”
“I can’t help it. If I could talk to someone, it would be easier.”
Calab frowned again. Her sulking was infuriating. He could not understand what her problem was. He had told her repeatedly that they would protect her and if she would just believe it, she could save herself the bother of worrying. Humans always found something to be unhappy about in every situation; he had spent half of his time in Lycea observing humans who were trying to find ways to deal with their self-imposed unhappiness. Usually, the ones he watched ate and drank to excess and took mind-altering substances to ‘transcend self-conscious selfhood’ as Huxley said—he did not think that would help the girl.
“I don’t think I will be good to talk to,” he said. “I don’t know the responses that will make you feel better.”
“You have before.”
“I quote literature at appropriate times. It is not the same as understanding your feelings. I know the words, but not the music.”
“It helps.”
“I doubt that,” he said. “I do have a list of phrases I dole out when I want to seem caring, ‘One day we’ll laugh about this’ or ‘I would feel the same in your position’ or ‘look at the bright side, at least, you’re alive’. Pick whichever one you think will help.”
She gazed at him with her eyes wide for a few moments before looking down at her hands and picking at her nails. He frowned as he watched her. He had upset her, and he wished he hadn’t. He tried to think of something to say to make the feeling go away.
“Thank you for the books,” she said, breaking the long silence, “they’re beautiful.”
“You’re welcome.”
Their lunch arrived, and they ate in relative silence. Calab did not think of anything to say to remedy what he had said. He did not know why he even wanted to. Having the girl in the guild was a terrible idea and the sooner she was gone the better.
Eve had been disappointed though not surprised that Calab had been unwilling to talk to her. She had been a little hurt that he had been so mean, though, if the guardian book were to be believed, she should not have been. Following this; however, Calab had begun to call on her each morning to ask of her wellbeing and dined with her in the evenings. She knew he was doing it out of duty rather than out of any genuine concern or interest, but she appreciated it nonetheless. He had also taken her to the music room one evening after supper and sat beside her on the sofa while Tamiel played the piano. She knew he had little regard for her and found her irritating, but she could not help that she had grown fond of him and even when he was snapping and snarling at her, she still wanted to be in his company. Of course, this was mostly because he was the only person in the guild who was willing to have any sort of conversation with her, however reluctantly, and she presumed he only did that because she would be the queen someday.
Eve had been at the guild for four weeks when Thalia finally called on her. Eve was relieved to see a friendly face and surprisingly relieved to see a female face after spending the last month surrounded by grumbling, growling male faces. Eve was also happy to see a human(ish) face, although she was becoming accustomed to the rough demonic features and did not find them as severe or as menacing as she did when she first met Calab or when she first arrived at the guild.
“Are you well?” asked Thalia, as they sat down in Eve’s quarters.
“Yes,” she replied, “I am being looked after. I was lonely at first, but Calab is trying to be around more.”
“How are you getting on with Calab?” asked Thalia, sipping her tea.
“Okay, I suppose. He doesn’t like me very much, but he tolerates me for the most part.”
“Why do you think that? He is moody with everyone so I shouldn’t be concerned about that.”
“It isn’t just that, I just get the feeling that he would rather I wasn’t here. I think he only makes an effort because I’m going to be queen, I don’t think he would want anything to do with me otherwise.”
“I doubt that is true. Demons can be difficult to relate to, they don’t have the same emotions that we have. If you are trying to talk to him about your feelings, then you will hit a wall, but that doesn’t mean that he does not like you.”
“Sometimes I feel that he can understand, though I don’t think he likes it. He said that he ‘knows the words, but not the music’. I’m not convinced it is entirely correct, there are flickers when he seems to understand.”
“It can be difficult to comprehend them, but you should not push to find something that is not there. If you think of him as black and white with no grey areas, then you will get along with him much easier.” Eve frowned, she was unconvinced by Thalia’s assessment, the other demons perhaps, but she had seen more in Calab—nothing seemed black and white or straightforward with him. “Tell me about your nightmares. Calab tells me that you’ve been sleeping in the dungeon as you wake up screaming each night. I must say I was quite appalled when he did though I have since seen the room he made for you and it is quite cosy.”
Eve smirked. “I was livid when I first found out I was going there, my first act as queen was going to be to have him executed. It’s not so bad, and at least I’m not keeping everyone awake.” Eve began to tell her about the dream. “I just keep seeing a void coming, I don’t know what it is, and I don’t know what to expect, but it’s terrifying. It started after I had a conversation with Calab when I asked him what the Imperator would do to me if they captured me and he wouldn’t tell me. He said I wouldn’t want to know. I don’t think I do want to know and even though I believe I’m safe here, I just can’t get it out of my head. I don’t think it is just the Imperator, though, I have no idea what to expect from the future—all the uncertainty terrifies me.
“I never know what progress is made unseating the Imperator, Calab doesn’t really keep me up-to-date, or maybe he does, and there really is no progress. I don’t know. I am scared of being queen… How can I possibly be a queen?”
“I’m sorry,” said Thalia. “I should have visited earlier. I forget that humans have different needs. In this world, it is not unusual to go months or years without seeing a friend. I should have realised that you would feel alone and need someone to talk to. I apologise for that.”
“You’re here now.” Eve smiled. “It’s not that I want answers as such, I don’t think I would like the answers if I got them. I think I just need someone to moan at.”
“I understand. It is not surprising that you should be afraid of the uncertainty the future holds. To go from your human world to a non-human world
would be stressful enough, but you have the additional stress of having the threat against you and the task of ruling in that world once the threat is removed. There is not a great deal I can say to alleviate that stress other than assure you that you are safe here. We are observing the Imperator’s movements, and we have plans in place to ensure your safety if he should act.”
“When is the meeting with the Imperator?”
“It is in three weeks.”
Three more weeks!
She would have been at the guild for nearly two months by then.
Why does everything take so long?
She vowed to make things happen faster when she became queen. “Why does it take so long?” The whole meeting thing made her nervous. She just wanted it to be over.
“He is not in a rush to give up his position.”
“If he’s to be executed anyway, surely you could just gather your armies and take him out.”
“You sound like Calab. Who said he is to be executed?”
“Calab said he most likely will be.”
“What do you think?”
“I’m not sure. I can’t help thinking I’d feel a lot safer if he was dead. Moreover, the longer he is left in his position, the more time he has to plan and maybe even attack the alliance. It might be better to attack him when he least expects it and unseat him sooner rather than later. You could try to spare his life if it’s safe to do so.”
“Has Calab been filling your head with this talk?” asked Thalia, frowning.
“Calab barely speaks to me,” she replied. “I can think for myself.”
“You shouldn’t be so quick to resort to acts of violence because you are afraid.”
“I think I’m more afraid of the consequences of not acting,” said Eve, feeling herself bristle at Thalia’s dismissal of her opinions. “If something doesn’t happen before the meeting, then it will happen there. You said yourself that the oracle had foreseen that he wanted to take out all the rulers and you will be all in one room trying to take his leadership from him, it will be his final chance to strike.”
