“Is it Shawn?” Vayu asked, not able to spare a glance down at the body.
I looked at his face, and shook my head. “No.”
The man’s eyes, probably the only unscathed part of his body, were a light brown, not Shawn’s icy blue stare. I couldn't look away; there was too much white in his eyes. His lids were almost completely burned off. Bile rose in my throat.
He began to gurgle in an effort to say something.
I whispered back though he probably couldn’t hear me, “Shhh…..don’t say anything. I’ll get you help.” I touched his shoulder gently and bits of something flaked off. I couldn’t tell if it was skin or clothing. The entire body was either black or red; he wasn’t going to make it no matter what I did. I didn’t feel the same sense of pity as I did with the koala bears; I felt physically ill. I looked at him again and mouthed the words ‘I’m sorry’.
Recognition flashed in his eyes. I believe I had just been so kind as to help him realize his own death was close at hand. I lay down next to him, oblivious of the fire around us. The least I could do was stay with him until the end. Vayu was yelling something, but my priorities were clear. I wasn’t a Gaia right then, nor was I Kaitlyn. I was simply the last connection this man would have in his life.
Vayu, still yelling, rustled around in the pack on my back for something. My body jerked as his search became more frantic.
The man resumed his attempts to speak, despite my insistence that he lay still. I leaned in closer, trying to interpret a phrase he said over and over. Only two words in the garbling were comprehensible, and they were enough to freeze me in place. “One less, one less.”
He began shifting his body and grunting; I couldn’t subdue him with my hands for fear of causing more damage. Finally he leaned away from me, pulling out a bag from underneath the blanket. It was shiny; possibly fireproof. Inside the bag was a thick, neatly bound document. He must have been protecting the document while sacrificing his own body. The white pages were a stark contrast to the blackened earth below and his charred hand. He pushed the document feebly toward me, leaving streaks of ash behind on the pristine paper as he pulled his hand away. On the cover was one simple symbol, the same symbol worn on my shoulder as a permanent scar of Shawn’s doing.
Suspicions confirmed, my body went numb. The charred man smiled, his white teeth in stark contrast to his blackened lips. “I was chosen to be one less.” Triumph and self-importance emanated from him. His smile, no matter how much it anguished him to do so, was the last thing I saw.
Vayu threw himself over me holding the fire blanket around both of us. It was only big enough for two. He pinned down as many sides of the blanket as he could. The temperature inside spiked, the fire a deafening roar around us. Despite being smothered by Vayu’s weight, the air inside the blanket was breathable. No smoke seeped in under the blankets edges. Vayu had to have been using a trick to put oxygen in the air under the blanket. We could do nothing but lay there and wait for the fire to pass. The image of the symbol, clear and foreboding underneath streaks of ashes, was seared into my brain. Half hoping the document was now burning in the fire, I reached out gingerly to search for it. My fingers made contact and I quickly retracted my hand. Vayu had to have shuffled it closer while trying to get the blanket down, probably not even realizing what it was.
I tried to force my mind to more pleasant images and immediately thought of Micah. Oh, God – Micah! He was out there, left to face this quick-moving monster with a sick sister to slow him down. I thought about reaching out to him, mentally, but no, distracting him for my own selfish knowledge wouldn’t help him. Agitated, I could no longer lay still under Vayu’s weight. I heaved him off to the side. He struggled to keep the blanket pinned down under my sudden movement. I took control of one side to help him. It was surprisingly difficult as the fiery wind constantly tried to work its way underneath, ripping and pulling at the blanket.
“Don’t fight it,” Vayu yelled at me. “Work with it.”
By applying pressure in different places, I figured out what he meant. The blanket went lax and I was no longer struggling to hold on. The fire seemed to roar in agitation at our endurance. I held my focus on the gray blanket, watching it waver almost leisurely now. Finally, the fire gave up. Once the roaring died down to a dull rumble in the distance, Vayu peeked out cautiously. He waited a moment then lifted the blanket off of us slowly.
My jaw dropped, looking at the landscape. Everything was either black or still under smoldering embers. Trees were twisted or bent over in agony and thin plumes of smoke rose like spires into the sky. I turned to Vayu then followed his gaze from the skies down to our feet. The man now lay in a charred heap. I turned away quickly.
“Nature’s way of renewing the earth,” Vayu whispered.
I shook my head, “It could have been contained – we failed. I failed.”
He didn’t answer me.
We stood in shock for a few minutes longer. I snapped out of it, trying to focus on getting us back to safety. I stuffed the blanket back into my backpack and picked up the document. “Which way to the neighborhood we passed?”
Vayu, bringing himself out of his own trance, started to look around. “I’m not sure. Everything looks different.” Panic hit his face. “We don’t even have the radio – Micah took it.”
“I can find Micah…maybe.” I put a calming hand on Vayu’s arm. If he isn’t dead. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, preparing myself for what I might find. I pictured myself, standing in the blackened landscape alone and lost. I solidified the image then sent it out, hoping Micah would receive it. He did. I felt it being absorbed and returned with an image of him helping his sister out of a large pond. I smiled in relief. They’d managed to find enough water to submerge themselves in until the fire passed. “This way!” I yelled to Vayu, barely waiting for him to follow me. The thought of Micah’s arms around me, strong and sturdy, urged me on.
It wasn’t long before he came into view, pulling his sister behind him. I broke into a sprint, oblivious to the charred shrubbery and sticks that scratched at my ankles. I tripped and landed hard on the ground.
Leave it to me to ruin a Hollywood moment, I groaned inwardly. The document floated away, landing just out of my reach, at Micah’s feet. He stopped dead in his tracks, staring at the symbol; a painful reminder to us both of his failure to protect me. He bent down to pick it up, completely ignoring the fact that I was sprawled out beside it.
“That tells me where I stand,” I said getting up and dusting myself off. “Or lay, for that matter.” I looked around but no one got the joke. Micah, and now Susan, who had approached from behind, were staring at the symbol. And Vayu was staring at them, trying to interpret their faces.
“Where did you get this?” Micah finally looked at me.
I thought of the man and had to fight back the bile that rose in my throat. “I think it was left for me. By Shawn.”
Micah’s eyes flashed. “You saw him?”
“No.” I snatched the document out of his hands and stuffed it into my backpack. “Let’s just get out of here – we can talk about it later.”
Micah stared at me, questions coursing through his expression and his eyes willing me to explain.
“You can just stop with your eye tricks,” I said, a little more harshly than I had intended. “If I talk about it now I’m going to be sick all over the place – then you’ll really have something to stare at.”
He looked away. “Fine. Later, then.” He pulled out his handheld, calling Alex. Just static. Micah sighed, “The van is this way. Hopefully it didn’t burn up. Careful where you step. The hotspots will burn right through your shoes.”
Micah set off and Vayu followed. Susan and I looked at each other, exchanged sympathetic expressions, then held hands for support as we followed the men back to civilization.
Chapter 6
Cleaning Up
Our walk back to the van was silent. We avoided looking at the charred houses th
at only hours ago stood secure and strong. I hoped the owners made it out unscathed, but I had no desire to go looking for more burnt bodies. I’d seen one too many already. Even the world seemed silent, the air eerily void of the sounds of bugs, birds, or whatever other animals might be out and about in Australia on a warm spring day. Besides our footsteps, only the occasional cracking branch giving in to its injuries filled the dead space.
Alex and Cato didn’t ask any questions as we reached them, we all just shuffled to fit them in the van and headed for a hotel. There were few other guests, most having voluntarily evacuated, leaving enough space for us each to have our own room at their discounted disaster rate. I immediately holed myself up in my room, trying to avoid any further questioning from Micah. Once in the room, I went straight for the shower. I scrubbed my body from head to toe, over and over again until my skin felt raw. I only stopped once the water running off my body and down the drain was clear – not the sinister black of charred forest. I released a breath. Better raw than seeing one smudge of ash to remind me of earlier. I dried off, turned the television on max volume, not caring what channel blared through the room. Cocooning myself in the thick covers of the bed, an Australian fishing competition was just loud enough to drown out my own thoughts.
* * *
The next morning, with the smell of fire and ash still thick in the air; I emerged from my cocoon only when my bladder gave me no choice. Washing my hands, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and almost gasped out loud. The dark circles under my eyes were nothing compared to the mess of brown and gold strands hanging from my head, knotted and crinkled from the roots to the tips.
Trying to occupy my mind with nothing last night was so effective I didn’t even remember one of the most important beauty tips my mother gave me – never go to bed with wet hair. It was crinkled in some placed, and sticking straight up in other places. I tried pulling at my hair in vain. The only solution was another shower.
Two showers in eight hours. I had never been so clean in my life. My physical cleanliness did not mirror my emotional state. I began to chase away visions forming in my head. Burning trees that reach out for me, and bodies lumped on the ground, making it impossible to get away. I definitely needed a distraction and soon; something more powerful than TV.
As I was stepping out of the shower, I couldn’t hear the TV. Thinking further, I realized it wasn’t even on when I woke up.
Distraction achieved.
Had someone come into the room without me even knowing? Were they still around? I looked around the bathroom for something to cover myself just in case. Two towels did the trick; they were the only option next to the clothes I wore yesterday now piled in a black heap next to the toilet.
I poked my head out cautiously and called, “Hello?”
The intruder spoke, “I put clothes in front of the door there for you.”
I craned my neck out further and saw him sitting on the corner of the bed with his back to me. “Cato?!”
He didn’t respond; keeping his head respectfully turned away.
I looked at the clothes he had left for me, complete with undergarments. I made a face. “Well, that is kind of disturbing.”
“Not as disturbing as this.” He held up the document given to me yesterday. I growled at the thought of having to discuss it with anyone but scooped up the pile of clothes and changed nonetheless. I ran a comb through my hair but left it wet, vowing to take a blow dryer to it before I went to bed again.
Cato spoke before I could. “Have you read any of it yet?”
I shook my head, joining him on the bed. “I can’t look at the thing without feeling sick.”
He eyed me critically, as if wondering what could have been that bad. “I see. Micah let me know about it, and I’ve read through some of it while you were still under your blankets. Sorry for the intrusion, but this isn’t something that can wait.”
“What is it, exactly?” I asked trying to avoid glancing at the white paper still marked with streaks of ash from the deliverer’s hand.
“It appears to be a business plan.”
“What?” Confused and maybe a little intrigued, I now leaned over to see.
Cato opened the document to the table of content and I scanned over it; Mission Statement, Description of Corporation, Feasibility Studies, Location, Personnel, Financial Data...
Cato explained, “He is starting his own organization, with a mission similar to ours but carried out with extremely different principals.”
“We knew that much, but why share such detailed information with us? It’s like he is giving us a roadmap to bring him down.” I flipped over to the page number that supposedly held the organization’s location information. It was blank. “Oh.”
“He conveniently omitted a few parts.” Cato pushed himself up from the bed stiffly. Yesterday must have been hard on him, too. “Susan, Alex, and I are leaving today. There isn’t much more we can do here. We will be counting on you, Vayu, and Micah to continue to help contain the fire until it is manageable enough for the local authorities to control it on their own.” He closed the document still in his hand. “Here.”
I put up my hands in protest. “I’d rather not.”
“I am insisting, Kaitlyn. This was given to you, and although we may not understand exactly why, I think it best that you read through it.”
I stood up angrily. “Shawn put me through hell and back. I went through things you could never even begin to understand. I don’t want anything more to do with him!”
Cato kept his cool as always, meeting my fiery stare. “I know. But it seems as though Shawn wants everything to do with you. And I think we both know him well enough to know that you don’t have a choice in the matter.” Cato tossed the document next to me on the bed. “Read it. Analyze it. Understand it. Know it from front to back. Witnessing the lengths that Shawn will go to, such as with this wildfire, I admit I was wrong. I now believe there is a large, drawn out battle approaching, and this may very well be the key to saving your own ass one day.”
That was the first time I heard Cato curse. It sounded ten times more atrocious coming out of his mouth than from anyone else. He took his exit before I could recover from shock.
I sat in silence for a few minutes, occasionally glancing at the document with wary looks. It felt as though it were Shawn himself sitting next to me. Finally, I decided it could wait a little longer, and I went out into the hall to look for Susan, or Micah, or anyone else that could keep me occupied. I soon realized I had no idea where any of their rooms were. Well, we were the only current tenants of the hotel as far as I knew. Finding them couldn’t be hard.
I walked down the hall, pausing at each door to listen for signs of life. After hearing nothing the entire length of the hallway, I turned around and yelled, with my outdoor voice, “Hello?!”
My voice echoed down the hallway and for a long moment nothing moved. My pulse started to race, a momentarily terrifying moment of abandonment hit me. Finally, a door not too far from me opened and Micah poked his head out, “We’re in here.”
Sighing in relief, I walked a little too quickly into his room. He didn’t seem to notice. Three backpacks and a spread of supplies covered his bed, everything in triplicate. Fire blankets, first aid supplies, water bottles, walkie-talkies, and dehydrated food. Vayu began packing everything in the backpacks. “Ready for another round?”
I sighed, but a job which prevented me from going back to my room, and back to what awaited me there, was better than nothing.
* * *
The next three days were filled with on-the-job training on how to fight fire with wind. My nights were spent holed up in my room reading the paperwork given to me. My days were significantly better than my nights. The document was completely Shawn, written by his own hand. The words resonated through my mind as if he were reading them to me in his pompous voice. I read each night until I could bear no more of Shawn in my head.
By the end of the third day
, Micah announced we had done our part. We’d leave the next morning. Vayu and I merely nodded in acknowledgment. It was a struggle to expend even that much energy. Perhaps Micah was the only reason I could still stay on my feet. The entire time we were out, Micah strayed no further than a few yards from me. His closeness was comforting, and the few brief moments of physical contact sent chills through my body, even in the blinding heat. A brush of the hands or accidental bump of the shoulders seemed enough to keep me moving to the end of the day.
That night, Micah stopped me gently before I could put my key card in the door to my room. “I want to take you to dinner tonight.”
I looked up at him with tired eyes. As much as I wanted to crawl into bed, I also wasn’t ready to leave him. Despite our long day, his eyes were bright and his skin looked smooth, amazingly hydrated. He must have been a stark contrast to my chapped lips and smudges of black I had to have had across my forehead and cheeks. Were we not just in the same fire fight?
“I have to warn you,” he continued, “I want to talk to you about the document.”
Ah, so there’s the rub.
I weighed my options, but in the end couldn’t resist his green eyes boring down at me. “Fine. Let me get cleaned up – give me 15 minutes.” I glanced at my dirty fingernails and realized I could smell my own body odor, even over the smoky smell that seemed irreversibly soaked into my pores. “I mean half an hour, give me half an hour.”
He smiled. “Deal.”
* * *
Some of the restaurants had reopened. Micah chose a small diner, requesting a seat in the corner for privacy. Privacy from what, I don’t know; we were the only customers. As it was, the waitress had plenty of time to hover over us, attending to our every need, which gave us very little opportunity to talk. She seemed a little too entranced with Micah. I bristled. Once our food came, I asked for the check and dismissed her, saying we’d call her over if we needed anything else. She huffed and turned away; probably disappointed she wouldn’t have more excuses to flaunt herself in front of Micah. He smiled at the look I gave her. My jealousy surprised even me after not having any intimate contact with Micah for months. Maybe that would change…
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