“So they found the camp because of me?” My heart sank thinking about all the destruction and lives lost from the new camp Nicholae had created—and all of it because of me showing up.
“I had been afraid it was from Logan’s tablet, but it looks like this little device was the culprit.” He stopped, observing my sullen face. “Don’t blame yourself. You didn’t know. I should have realized it sooner. It’s my fault. My setback—and certainly not our first.”
I kept letting everyone around me down. I shook my head. I wanted to tell him what really happened to Bruno, but I couldn’t. It was always Mr. Gordon coming to my aid and defense. I would be nothing if it wasn’t for him.
“Casualties are inevitable in every fight,” Nicholae said. “You try to minimize them as best you can and move on. We’re not done. We’re still here to fight.”
“I know,” I said.
“Then shake it off. It’s not your fault. You fought your way out and you’re here now. Did you see him?”
I knew he was referring to Kafka.
“Yeah. Briefly. No one is how I remember them.”
“Everything changes,” Nicholae said with a smirk. “We can only continue to move forward.”
“What now?” I asked. “Destroy it?”
“If you want to lead him right here as well. No, this tracker needs to keep moving.”
I felt the bunched up Frolics in my front pocket when we both stood up. Nicholae was already headed for the door when I called him back. I pulled Frolics out and held him out for Nicholae to see when he turned around.
“Wow,” he said. “How did you get him back?”
“Let’s just say he was a gift from Alexandria.”
“Alexandria…” Nicholae took the stuffed animal from me and stared at it like a recovered treasure, which in a way it was.
“I thought he was gone forever.” Nicholae paused and handed Frolics back to me. “Everything’s falling back into place.”
“You say that after your camp just fell.”
“Yet we’re still here to continue the good fight.”
We were about to head out, when I stopped Nicholae again.
“Wait,” I said, suddenly remembering who’d helped me escape the asylum. “There may be one more.”
Outside, the bodies were now cleared. Several campfires blazed inside circles of stones. At the edge of the woods, single stones seemed to mark where each body had been buried.
Nicholae took Logan inside the cathedral and closed the doors behind them.
Desiree, sitting next to Mr. Gordon, beckoned me over. Matilda and Cassandra went around the circle handing each of us a plate full of food: a breast of some white meat, a full potato, and a hearty helping of spinach. My attention toggled between the two women, and each time I looked to the other woman, she had another full plate in her hand—manifesting plates out of thin air, one at a time.
“This is delicious,” Desiree said, her plate already half empty. “Sure beats cooking.”
“I bet cleanup’s a cinch as well,” I said.
Nicholae and Logan emerged from the cathedral a few minutes later. He walked up to one of the wolves, whom I didn’t think was Ingrid. Then I saw Ingrid approach the two of them. Nicholae descended to one knee, speaking softly to the majestic animals. He ran his hands through the thick fur on their necks before rising. The two wolves took off into the night. Nicholae turned and gave me a look that said problem solved.
He took a seat across from us, next to Erik, and Cassandra quickly handed him a plate. Nicholae picked up his meat, took a test bite, and then held the remainder of the piece to the edge of the fire. Flames licked his fingertips, but he showed no discomfort. He brought his hand back and took a big, ripping bite.
“Perfect,” he said, while still chewing.
“You dry it out too much,” Erik said. “It’s perfect just the way Cassandra prepares it.”
“You’ve always had a soft spot for her cooking.”
“Hey, what about mine?” Matilda said, pouting her lips.
“You know we love your cooking as well,” Erik said with a laugh.
Desiree finished her food and placed the empty plate off to the side.
“What were you and Nicholae talking about?” Jeremy asked. He was seated on Desiree’s far side, and Logan and Autumn after him.
“He just wanted to make sure Logan and I were all right since we were separated from the rest of you,” I said. I didn’t want to tell him that Logan or I might have been the reason for the ambush today. I didn’t even want to look him in the eyes and instead looked across the clearing to another fire pit where Darius and his family sat.
“But you both were with him,” he said accusatorily. “He leave you again?”
“He had to protect his camp.”
“He was supposed to be protecting you.”
“Are you gonna finish that?” Desiree asked, gesturing to the remaining half of a potato on my plate.
“No, go ahead.” I offered my plate and she took the rest of my dinner without hesitation.
After Desiree finished eating, we went back into the cathedral. The flapping of wings overhead gave the building a creepy vibe as birds flew around within the vaulted ceiling, not to mention all the tree trunks sticking out from the rows of pews. Dozens of light orbs hovered about ten feet up, providing dim light and casting shadows throughout the cavernous space. Elaborately carved wooden pillars lined the walls between stained-glass windows and arched inward with the roof. All together, they looked like the gigantic ribcage of a great monster.
We took a seat in a pew near the organ in front, just to the left of the altar, and far away from the main double doors. A large plain wooden cross hung prominently from the back wall.
“What do you think it represents?” I asked, gazing at the iconic, religious symbol from back home. It looked the same, but its origins here would be completely different.
“Hope,” Desiree answered.
“Why hope?”
“Because it’s a good thing to believe in,” she said, angling her body toward me, and leaning back slightly to compensate for the angle of the pews—actually, the angle of the whole building. “The biggest thing we need right now.”
I took one of her hands resting on her knee and held it in mine. Her eyes were large emerald pools I could swim in forever, and the longer she looked at me, the more desperate I was to jump in. Random strands of hair pulled free from her ponytail and fell into her face. The smears of dirt caking her neck and chin did nothing to hide her natural beauty.
“What if Kafka wins?” I asked.
“We can’t think like that.”
“But you have to admit, we’re not in good shape.”
“We just have to want it more than he does.” She touched my knee propped on the pew with her free hand.
“We have to know,” I whispered. My eyes dropped to her hand in mine. “I know I’d never forgive myself if I lost you in the process.”
“I know I’d never forgive myself if I went home and did nothing after seeing what Kafka’s doing to all these people. How long is our home going to be safe from him if he continues this rampage?”
“It probably won’t be for long.”
“Exactly,” she said. “I don’t want to wait for that to happen. I want to be part of preventing it so my family can be safe, too.”
“Yeah, but I want to keep you safe.”
“Well, I want to keep you safe. Are you going to back down from this?”
“I have nowhere else to go,” I said. “You do. You can go home; I can’t.”
“Can’t you? Or did you just not want to?”
“What? Are you serious?” I pulled my hands away from hers, balling them into fists in a sudden rage. “You saw that I couldn’t. Mr. Gordon confirmed it—you know, because I fused with my mirror or something.”
“I saw you not being able to transition, but…” Her voice dropped and she bit her lip as she planned her next words care
fully. “Are you sure you weren’t blocking yourself on some level because you didn’t want to go home, because you wanted to find you dad so badly? Mr. Gordon had been denying you for a while. He was bound to give in sooner or later.”
“No,” I said immediately, without even considering her suggestion. “It wasn’t like that at all. I did want to find my father, but not at the expense of abandoning my mother. Now I may never see her again.”
“Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
I wanted to apologize, too, for getting upset, but I couldn’t. I looked over at the cross and tried to believe in hope—hope that we would all make it out of this alive, hope that I would see my mother again, hope that Anna was alive and safe somewhere, hope that we could actually stop Kafka. As our army diminished, his seemed to grow. It was hard to believe we still had a chance, but Desiree was right. Entertaining those thoughts were inviting defeat into our already fragile position. If I wanted to keep Desiree safe, then we had no choice but to kill Kafka—the right way this time.
The creak of footsteps rang out behind us, causing a flurry of birds to disperse and regroup overhead. I glanced over my shoulder to see Jeremy, Logan, and Autumn approaching us.
“What are you two lovebirds talking about?” Jeremy asked, and hopped into the pew behind us. Logan and Autumn followed him into the same row.
“That it would be much safer for most of you to go home. I’m the only one really stuck here. How about you, Autumn, where’s home for you?” I asked.
“Glowerbrook, on the east side of Doria. It’s about an hour drive from here,” she said softly.
“It’s probably safer there than here with us. How about your family?”
“I don’t know. I hope they’re all right, but after seeing all the destruction from the past few days—I don’t know.”
“When was the last time you were home?” Jeremy asked.
“Weeks, I think. It was hard to determine the length of time I was in that crazy hospital.”
“I know what you mean,” I said. “Why did they take you?”
“I don’t know that, either.” She glanced around at each of us with wide brown eyes, seemingly nervous from all the attention. “I went into the hospital for appendicitis. The doctors put me under before the procedure, and when I woke up, I awoke in that terrible place…with her, that voice…”
“Your mirror,” Logan said.
“My shadow,” she corrected.
I had déjà vu of her using the term in the interrogation room, practically proving she was from this plane.
“Is that different?” Desiree asked.
Autumn shrugged. “I’m not familiar with a mirror being anything besides reflective glass.”
“They’re the same,” I chimed in. “Mirrors, shadows, daediems—they’re all the same. It just depends which plane you’re in.
“I knew that,” Jeremy said smugly.
“Yes, because it was just explained to you,” Logan mocked, and they both slapped each other back and forth.
Other people began slowly filing into the cathedral a few minutes later, claiming pews of their own to sit, reflect, and convert into beds. They weren’t all that comfortable, even without my vest and gun belt, but it was better than sleeping on the ground. I wanted to sleep alongside Desiree, wrapped around her warm body, but the pews were too skinny. So we lay down on either end of the pew, with our feet lightly brushing in the middle.
Today had been one hell of a day. Tomorrow had to bring some better luck. I didn’t want to think about the contrary. We had all found each other. And now that we were all together, that was the most important thing.
Oliver Remembers (iv)
“Pack your things, boys,” Mom said as she barged into Jeremy’s room. We had finished dinner about an hour ago and I’d ventured into Jeremy’s room for some company before bedtime. All the stuffed animals and toys hovering around the room dropped simultaneously when Mom entered.
“I win again!” Jeremy yelled. “I had eleven and you had eight.”
“Almost twelve,” I complained. “I was going for Frolics, and he’s worth four points. Thanks, Mother!”
“I’m sorry I interrupted your game, but you need to pack anything you’d like to keep. We’re leaving first thing in the morning, before sunrise.”
Frolics ran to her and jumped up on his hind legs to get her attention. His tail whipped back and forth like it was motorized and he whined louder the longer she didn’t give him the affection he so desperately desired. Mom finally scooped him up and held the small cocker spaniel in one arm, stroking his back with the other.
“I don’t think he likes it when you float him,” she said.
“Sure he does,” Jeremy said.
“And have you ever dropped him?”
Jeremy and I looked at each other sheepishly and snickered.
“Maybe two or—” I said.
“Not far,” Jeremy interjected.
“Start packing and then get to bed. Tomorrow will be a long day. Take whatever you don’t want left behind.”
“When will we come back?” Jeremy asked.
“I don’t know,” Mom said.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“Down the mountain.”
“Is Father coming?”
“Yes.”
“Can I start in a few minutes?” I asked.
“No,” she said curtly. “I want you to start now.”
“But Mother…” I stretched the word mother into an entire sentence.
“Oliver, I’m not going to tell you again.” She stepped aside—still holding Frolics, who’d calmed down considerably—so I could pass.
I moped up to the door, dragging my feet and moving as slowly as I could without stopping.
“Remember, you owe me your dessert tomorrow,” Jeremy said once I reached the door.
“Half,” I protested.
“That wasn’t the deal.”
“But it’s not fair, we were—”
“What if no one gets dessert tomorrow?” Mom said, apparently not amused with our bet. She pushed me through the doorway to quicken my stalling pace and turned back to Jeremy. “Don’t take advantage of your younger brother. You’re supposed to be his protector. That’s what big brothers are.”
“Yes, Mother,” Jeremy answered mechanically.
She closed the door and followed me back to my room.
12
Split
I awoke with the sun the next morning. I looked over to see if Desiree was awake, but she was still knocked out. I thought of waking her with a kiss, and then thought better of it. She needed her sleep.
I slipped on my shoes and quietly made my way outside.
A few of the Lornes sat around the closest campfire, eating and casually conversing. They acknowledged me, and I was about to sit with them when I saw Jeremy ostracized to another campfire. I wished them a good morning and strolled over to see my brother.
“You’re up early,” I said, taking a seat in the grass beside him.
“My arm’s sore,” he replied. “It kept me awake.”
“Why don’t you ask Mr. Gordon for some help?”
“No, I’m fine.”
“But you just said—”
“Just drop it, Oliver.” I knew he was serious when he actually used my name when we were the only two people in the conversation.
Jeremy held a metal plate with scrambled eggs and chunks of grilled potatoes, which he forked into his mouth while he stared into the fire. He had never been the antisocial one, but he seemed different this morning, not himself at all.
“Cassandra’s making breakfast, if you want some,” he finally said after a few more apathetic bites. “If you can really call what she does as making breakfast.”
“Manifesting breakfast, I guess.”
“It sounds weird.”
“Yeah, it does.” I laughed, hoping he’d join in. But his face was slack, his expression cold like the morning air.<
br />
I went to request some breakfast from Cassandra and returned to Jeremy a minute later with a full plate. It looked like he hadn’t moved an inch, like he was hypnotized by the dancing flames.
“What’s the matter?” I asked after taking my seat again without him even acknowledging I’d returned.
“Just thinking,” he said. “I’ve been a pretty lousy big brother.”
“No you h—”
“I haven’t protected you from anybody. I didn’t have your back when it counted. I did nothing when you went back into the city on your own. That’s it—I’ve just done nothing. Looking out for myself first.”
“I think you’re generalizing too much.”
“Nicholae was right. I’m careless and selfish. I put you in danger and only thought of myself. And it nearly got you killed.”
I looked directly at him while he spoke, but he didn’t glance over at me once.
“Yeah, that sucked. But things worked out, didn’t they? We’re both still here and looking out for each other now. You made a mistake. You can’t keep beating yourself up about it. That was a pretty unusual situation. I’m sure there was a lot of influence over you that you didn’t even realize. I know you’ve got my back when it counts.” I took a bite of my food. The eggs burned the roof of my mouth.
“If I was stronger, I would have seen through the façade…I would have weighed my choices better.”
“You’re plenty strong. You can do amazing things. I remember what you did to Sasha after he’d stabbed me. You’re holding yourself back now, but I saw what you were capable of.”
“I don’t know what you think you saw, but it was nothing amazing. I can beat up a couple of losers. Woopty-freakin-doo.”
“But I saw what you did. You used the same type of force I’ve learned to use.”
“What?” Jeremy finally looked over at me. “Punching someone in the face is no special force. Granted, I have a good right cross, which sent that idiot flying. But that’s it. I can’t do what you can do. I haven’t been able to in a very long time, since we were kids…if you remember that at all. It’s amazing what you forget when you grow up, especially where we did. As kids, it was easy.”
Doria Falls Page 16
