by Anthology
“He’s the right guy, Bree.”
“I guess I can’t argue with that.”
In the meantime, I had a choice to make about the wrong guy and, when I made up my mind, I called Logan. “I’ve decided.”
“Have you changed your mind?”
“No.” I paused, just to make sure he was okay with that. When he didn’t say anything, I continued. “Friday night.” Brendan wouldn’t return until the following week and my mom probably wouldn’t make an appearance until Saturday. Besides, I babysat Saturday night, so Friday evening was perfect. I’d also been on the pill for close to a year. I’d anticipated Brendan would finally give in, because we’d had a few hot and heavy make-out sessions that could have easily moved into clothes-off territory.
But that never happened.
Now, though, I was finally going to become a full-fledged woman. It made me nervous but the excitement I felt overruled the anxiety. I’d wanted this for far too long.
What to wear? I didn’t want to put on anything I usually would. This demanded more.
So I went into my mom’s room. I knew she had some really slutty stuff. While I was rifling through her drawers, I found a few different pieces of lingerie in various colors, things I knew my mother hadn’t worn in a long time. I found a lacy black bustier and, as I continued digging, a garter belt and thigh-high black hose to go with them.
Right below all that, I also discovered my mom’s pot stash.
I decided to take it, too, because weed could help me relax through an experience that I’d been told would hurt a little—or a lot, depending on the girl.
After I put the lingerie on, I looked at myself in the full-length mirror in the bathroom. I seemed so different, especially with the dark makeup I’d put on my face. I really did look like an adult. That revelation forced me to begin questioning myself, but I quickly pushed those thoughts out of my mind. Then I went to my closet to find what I was going to wear over the naughty undies. I had a black miniskirt that would look great with it, and I ditched the panties on a whim. A short-sleeved silky black blouse on top looked great but, with those stockings, I’d have to wear heels. I didn’t own any tall ones, but I got lucky, because mom did—and they looked like they’d only been worn once or twice.
When I was done, I assessed myself in the mirror once again. I loved the look so much, I considered snapping a pic with my phone and texting it to Logan but thought better of it. I’d rather surprise him.
I got a text from Logan before I left that said, Cooking dinner too so bring your appetite.
I was definitely doing that.
As I stepped outside my house, I wished more than ever that I had a car. But why did I care what my neighbors thought? I could have called Logan and asked for a ride, too, but I needed this time to think.
Of course, the entire way, I tormented myself, weighing the pros and cons of going through with my plan. On the pro side, I would be losing my virginity and I’d be experiencing something I’d wanted to for a long time. On the con side, I would be hurting Brendan, one of the sweetest guys I knew—and it would be doubly painful because I was doing it with his dad. So I had to keep this a secret forever. That was the only way to make it work if I decided to follow through.
By the time I got to Logan’s house, I was completely torn. Should I ring the doorbell or not? My finger was poised in front of the button but I was frozen, filled with second thoughts. Should I stay and go through with my plan or leave and pretend none of this ever happened? I knew that if I stayed, there was no turning back.
This was the proverbial fork in the road. No matter what I did, it would be the wrong choice…
CHAPTER SIX
My guilty conscience got the best of me, and I turned away from the house, ready to leave. But I heard the door open behind me and I looked back to see Logan, looking as handsome as a movie star on the big screen.
My attraction to him had me fully spun around, facing him in seconds.
When he took me in, I thought his eyes were going to pop out of his skull. Apparently, he liked my choice of clothing.
He also understood more than that based on where I was standing. “Briana, it’s okay if you’ve had a change of heart.”
It was then that I realized I was all in, consequences be damned. “No.” I stepped forward and then he extended his hand. As I took it, I walked through the doorway, sealing my fate.
I could smell tempting aromas wafting through the house from the kitchen. Logan certainly had a flair for cooking. “How about some dinner, cupcake?”
Cupcake? I kind of liked that but I didn’t know why. “Sounds great. What smells so good?”
“Manicotti, garlic bread, salad—and cream puffs for dessert.”
“You really like to cook, don’t you?”
He laughed. “I think I missed my calling. It’s my second love, next to teaching.”
The warmth of his hand in mine as we strolled toward the dining room helped me feel calm. “I don’t know why I’ve never asked, but what do you teach anyway?”
“I’m in the theater department. I teach anything and everything behind-the-scenes—set construction, costume design, you name it.”
Soon we were eating the gourmet meal Logan had prepared. More than anyone else, he made me feel spoiled. Even Brendan’s devotion and affection couldn’t come close. Logan was sweet and attentive—and the dinner turned out to be a little sexy—because he fed me part of my meal. He started by pinching off a bite of garlic bread and holding it to my mouth. The next time he did that, I sucked on his thumb.
But when dinner was over (and I wasn’t able to eat it all—I was getting too pent up), Logan said, “No clean up tonight.” Suddenly, my stomach clenched. I should have been excited but I was anxious, too. What if it hurt—a lot? And would I know what to do? Would it come to me instinctively or would my inexperience make for a horrible time?
“Thanks for dinner, Logan. I, uh…I brought some weed. I don’t know how you feel about that.”
His brow furrowed and his jaw grew tighter. “I thought you already knew. There will be no getting high at my house. Brendan already knows that rule.”
I felt a flare of anger then. If Logan and I were going to have an adult relationship, then he was going to treat me like an adult, not like a teenager. So I made up my mind in that moment—and it would determine where this progressed. “Look, Logan, I’m nervous. This is going to be my first time. Either you let me smoke a joint or I leave.”
I could see the turmoil in his eyes and it took him a little bit to answer. “Fine. Just go in the backyard to do it.”
I wasn’t like I was a huge druggie. Logan might not have known it about his son, although he probably hoped it, but Brendan wasn’t, either. Besides wanting to stay in tiptop shape as an athlete, he thought drugs were a complete waste of time and money. Get high on life, he’d say frequently.
I’d been curious, though, and had I not had a bestie like Chelsea, I might have done a lot more than I had. She and I had tried mom’s stash once, and that, to the best of my knowledge, was the only time Chels had ever done anything like that. I’d snuck from mom another time or two and then there was another time at a football party with Brendan where I’d smoked with a couple of kids. Like his dad, Brendan hadn’t been happy about that. But it was pot. It wasn’t like it was crack or meth or something.
I grabbed the little tin out of my purse and walked through the patio door. It was still really warm outside but it felt good on my skin after being in the air conditioned environment inside. I sat at the picnic table on the deck and then opened up the mints tin. There were rolling papers, pot, and a lighter inside. I hadn’t rolled a joint enough to be proficient at it (my mom was a pro), but it didn’t need to be perfect.
Part of me wanted to hurry, too, because I wanted to experience sex for the first time.
I lit the joint and took a light drag, holding it in my lungs for a few seconds before letting it go. After a couple more hits,
I was feeling good—light and floaty and on the verge of giggles. That was enough, because I didn’t want to be totally trashed and not enjoy myself. So I put it out. I thought some of sticking it in the tin, but mom would probably be able to tell by smell that I’d used some of it, so I wedged the joint in between the slats on the table. I’d get it later and smoke the rest at home if I felt like it.
I took a deep breath and smoothed the hair on my head, not that it needed it. With the tin in hand, I slid the patio door open. I didn’t see Logan, so I walked over to my purse that I’d tossed on the sofa and slid the tin inside. Hoping I didn’t reek of stinky pot smell, I then walked toward the dining room, the last place I’d seen him.
He was coming out of the kitchen then and he smiled at me. “You sure you want to do this, Briana? We can call this off right now, no hard feelings.”
My resolve was firm. “No, Logan. I really want to.”
The smile was but a shadow on his face now as he approached me, confident and sexy. I felt all my muscles tighten as a thrill charged through my body. “My God. You are probably more beautiful than you know.” I blinked. I’d always thought I was pretty enough, but I’d never considered myself beautiful. He took me into his arms and held me up against his body.
I was still amazed at how solid he felt. Brendan’s body was just as firm, of course, but I hadn’t expected it with Logan. I’d never seen him wear tight t-shirts—even his workout clothes were loose.
But I loved his feel up against me—and the feeling was mutual.
He’d been running his hand up and down my back, but he pulled away a little, ready to give me a kiss. At the same time, though, his hand was running down my skirt and then back up underneath. He’d barely touched my flesh when he said, “Fuck. Are you not wearing panties?”
I pursed my lips, trying to suppress a giggle.
“I don’t think I could have made it through dinner if I’d known that.” Holding my ass, he pressed my body into his. “Can you feel that?” Yes, I could. He was hard as a rock and I felt my breath catch in my throat. I’d never experienced that sensation before—not with Brendan or any other guy. It was exciting. “That’s how much I want you, Briana.”
I wanted to touch his erection with my hand, but my inexperience was showing—I wasn’t sure what I should and shouldn’t do. It partly felt inappropriate but then I reminded myself he was going to be my lover—so why couldn’t I touch his manhood?
I felt a surge of chemicals flood into my bloodstream, making me eager in spite of the fact that I was growing more relaxed. “Oh.”
Before I started groping, though, Logan continued. “Briana,” he said, stroking my cheek with the back of his hand, “why don’t we take a bath together first? I’ll draw one with bubbles that I bought just for the occasion—and we’ll get nice and warm before moving to the bedroom.”
“You did that just for me?”
“What?”
“Bought bubbles?”
“I thought you might like them.”
Smiling, I nodded and let him lead me by the hand to the upstairs bathroom.
It was kind of strange. The last time I’d been upstairs had been on my birthday with Brendan. I’d been trying to encourage him to do the very thing I was getting ready to do now with his dad. My brain was telling me—justifying my actions, that is—that I was doing the right thing, because I wasn’t pressuring my boyfriend into doing something he didn’t want to.
We didn’t go to the bathroom I was used to seeing; instead, we entered Logan’s bedroom. The walls were white but the queen-sized comforter was dark. The headboard was flat, a rich, dark wood that matched the dresser and desk in the room. I couldn’t look much, because Logan kept walking until we entered through another door. His bathroom wasn’t much different from the other one up here but the accents in it were also dark like his bedroom, starkly contrasting with the white walls. When he let go of my hand, he ran water in the tub until it warmed and then started filling it. The bubble bath he poured in had a light fruity vanilla scent.
When he stood, he continued to smile at me. I could still sense the butterflies in my stomach, but it was like they were far away where they couldn’t touch me.
“Would it make you more comfortable if we got undressed at the same time?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
It was a great way to keep me preoccupied—and eager. I unbuttoned the blouse while watching Logan pull his t-shirt over his head. Just as I suspected, he had noticeable abs. Everything under that shirt was tight and toned. I bit my bottom lip and then focused on my buttons, trying to pry my eyes away.
Logan had his shoes off by the time I was peeling the blouse from my frame. I peeked to see him unbuttoning his jeans, but his motions had slowed—because he was also watching me and I was distracting him. I could feel the air growing steamy as the tub filled with water and my nose flooded with the smell of oranges.
Slipping out of the shoes, I unzipped the skirt while Logan took off his jeans and tossed them so that all his clothes were in a pile next to the wall. He was wearing black boxer briefs that didn’t hide the fact that his package looked rather large. Was that good or bad? I’d often heard women complaining that they wanted a guy with girth, but what about the first time? Would it hurt worse if the guy was well endowed or would it even matter?
As I stood still after slipping out of the miniskirt, I heard a hissing sound and realized that Logan was sucking in air through his teeth. He was gazing at my outfit—and he apparently approved. “Holy shit. Baby, you’re a dream.” I grinned then and looked down at the outfit. The bustier didn’t make me look any thinner, but it did make my breasts look a little more impressive. I didn’t know if it was the bustier that had caused Logan to admire what I wore or if it was the garters attached to the stockings, highlighting my naked womanhood. When I looked back up at him, he said, “You have no idea what you’re doing to me.”
I giggled then, because I was getting a sense of the potential power I held in this situation. The bulge in his underwear had grown, and his hard cock was eager to come out and play. “Oh, I can see what I’m doing to you.” I laughed again.
He slid them off, those flesh-hugging boxers, and then I got to see the real deal. Finally, I felt the need to say, “I’m sorry.”
“What are you sorry for?”
“I can’t stop looking.”
“Stare away. I’m pretty proud of this guy.” Then he started stroking his cock and it seemed to grow even bigger in his hand. I blinked, still feeling like I shouldn’t be looking, and he seemed to sense that. “Look at it all you want, Briana. It doesn’t bother me at all.”
I’d seen enough…for the time being. Feeling shy, I forced myself to ask, “Can I touch it?”
He let out a small chuckle. “God, it’s like a dream come true. Can you touch it? Of course, you can. You can touch it all you fucking want.” I was still hesitant but not for the reasons he imagined. “Sorry about my language. I know you’ve never heard me talk that way, but you have no idea what you’re doing to me.” I took a tentative step because, yes, I wanted to touch it, feel how it would respond to my hand, become acquainted with it. His voice was lower when he said, “You’re bringing out the animal that’s been buried inside me for so long.”
Finally, I was right in front of him. The roar of the tub filling up with water was all I could focus on other than his veiny, throbbing member. My hands moved slowly, but I first touched one finger to the head of his cock. I don’t know why it surprised me that the flesh there was smooth to the touch, but my mind hammered home a couple of messages—one was that he hadn’t even kissed me yet. The other was that I’d never touched my boyfriend like this, much as I’d wanted to.
Soon my entire hand was holding his shaft, and its heat bled through into my palm. Logan made a noise in his throat almost like a moan, and that made me all the more eager to continue feeling him. It was throbbing against my flesh; already, I loved the rigid pulsating sensation
. His hands were on my hips and I felt like he might be ready already. “I can’t wait to make you feel good, baby, because right now you’re making me feel incredible.”
Wow. Just from touching him. I guessed it was true what they said, that men were ultra sensitive in that area.
He let out a long breath before saying, “I’m going to have to have you stop for a minute, cupcake. Why don’t you take off the rest of your clothes while I tend to the bath?”
I undid the garters first while slipping off my shoes and then peeled the hose off my legs. It felt good to let my skin breathe and, for some strange reason, my nude bottom didn’t bother me so much then. The snug bustier was a little trickier as I had to unzip it on the side before pulling the thin strap over my head. Before I knew it, though, I was naked.
I felt exposed and vulnerable but the heat between my legs reminded me of why I was here and what I wanted.
Logan’s erection stood proudly as he assessed my nude body. The hungry look on his face gave me a surge of pride. “Are you ready?”
“Yes.” I was feeling a little nervous again, but I knew soaking in a warm bath would help.
He shut off the water and got in, sitting down before offering me his hand so I could sit in front of him. I was starting to lose a lot of the awkward sensation and began feeling a little more eager as I dipped a toe into the bubbles.
The scent of vanilla and oranges hung in the air as I cautiously bent at the knees and squatted. I held the sides of the cool tub as I sat and accepted his invitation to lie back.
I could feel his hard cock against my back and I wondered if he was uncomfortable that way. He wasn’t complaining, though. After a bit, I allowed myself to completely relax and lay back against his chest. And the hot water did exactly what I’d been hoping it would—it helped me chill out, because I’d wound myself tight with anticipation.
After a bit, Logan began kissing my neck and I moved my head to expose more flesh there, because it felt good. Had Brendan ever kissed my neck? Not that I could remember.
