by D T Dyllin
My heart pounded in my ears, making it difficult to hear anything else. I forced my body to yield to the command to move. It protested with each step I took, sweat dripping down my spine, and also gathering on my face. Somehow I managed to get to the lower level of the ship without passing out.
What the— My mind blanked as is tried to process the scene before me.
Three tall, warrior-like men stood around Masha in a semi-circle. They looked mostly humanoid except for their size … and the fact that parts of them were made up of metal. But they were all smiling … at Masha. She was talking animatedly with her hands as she gazed up at them with adoration. I shook my head, blinking rapidly. I didn’t know what I’d been expecting, but certainly not what I got.
I cleared my throat. “Umm … Hey, Masha … You care to introduce me to your new friends?” The ones that just boarded my ship without permission, I added silently.
“Oh, Jane— I mean Captain Jane. This is Zar, Tar, and Dar. They’re Gartians.” She grinned at me, motioning to each of the three … men.
All three of them had long black hair. The more I looked at them the more— “Are they triplets?”
“Yes,” one of them, Zar maybe, responded. It at least would explain their names. As it turned out, all mothers of triplets, no matter the species, seemed to get weird about multiple births.
“Oh, right.” I had no idea how I was supposed to react to the whole situation. I was slightly more relaxed seeing how happy Masha was, but not completely at ease. After all, Zar, Tar, and Dar had just helped themselves onto my ship, and I still wasn’t sure how or why.
“They promised to get me my part, but in Gartian grade alloy!” Masha exclaimed, jumping up and down with pure joy.
I scanned my gaze over the three warriors. Except for the slightly jarring effect of the metal fused onto their bodies—which looked almost natural, as if it had melded with them or maybe like they were some kind of cyborgs—they were actually kind of attractive. A sudden thought occurred to me. What if that’s why they were being so accommodating to Masha? What if they weren’t insane freaks after all? What if they’d simply made themselves into some kind of cyborgs with their alloy? It wasn’t like I could just come right out and ask, though. “That’s great, Masha,” I said, while still eyeing the triplets.
“You have no reason to fear us,” Dar, maybe, stated in a deep rumble. “Masha has explained everything to us. You will be guests on our planet until the work has been done.”
I nodded, at least I think I did—the whole situation seeming beyond surreal. “Okay. Great. Thanks. I’m glad that us coming here wasn’t taken as some kind of insult or threat. I mean—”
“As I’ve said, Masha has explained it all. She told us that you are brash and rude with no sense of protocol, but your heart is in the right place.”
Frowning, I managed to keep my mouth shut. Masha and I are going to have some words later, that’s for sure. “Okay.” I was beginning to sound like an audio file stuck on repeat. I just didn’t know what else to say.
He then turned to Masha, addressing her. “You know what to do. We look forward to showing you the wonders of our planet.” With that, all three of them vanished right before my eyes. The ship’s alert system buzzed for a few moments before going silent, like when they’d entered.
“Masha,” I growled. “What the hell was that?”
She blinked her big black eyes at me as if confused. “They’re going to help me overhaul my engine, and the ship.” I didn’t miss the fact that she’d referred to it as her engine again.
“We’re kind of on a time crunch if we want to get the payment on Ash doubled.”
“No problem. They said it would take no more than twenty-four hours. They promised they’d make it their top priority. And they’re going to do it for a fraction of the money we have left.”
I narrowed my eyes at Masha, zeroing in on her flushed face. I’d always thought of her as childlike, but I knew for her species she was fully-grown, and as icky as it was, sexually mature. Did she like one of the Gartians that had just been on the ship? Maybe one of them would be the perfect match for her since they seemed to be part machine; at least I thought they were. “Umm … so they’re like cyborgs, huh?”
Masha nodded with excitement. “Yes. They’re so amazing! I can’t wait to see how smoothly my engine runs when it’s fitted with Gartian grade alloy!” She jumped up and down, clapping her hands.
So okay, maybe I was a bit of a pervert who translated almost everything into something sexual. It seemed like Masha was just enthused about the engine … as usual. “And you trust them?”
“Yes. I can read them perfectly.”
“Alrighty then. I’m going to go let Tamzea and Zula know what’s going on before they freak out up there.” I motioned towards the ladder leading up to the second floor of The Pittsburgh.
Things just kept getting more and more interesting.
The life of a bounty hunter is never dull.
What I found on the Gartian world was nothing like I’d expected. Even after meeting Zar, Tar, and Dar briefly on The Pittsburgh, my preconceived ideas wouldn’t let go. All the rumors that I’d been told over the years ricocheted around in my mind, heightening my anxiety. But what I found in reality … was family. A sense of unity. The Gartians, despite their horrible reputation, led an enviable life as a whole. I saw community and warmth. Not the cold insanity I’d been expecting. Some of them were more machine than anything else, and yet they exuded more of what I thought of as humanity than I’d ever felt on New Earth. It was the sense of home that I’d always craved. As usual, I was on the outside looking in.
My crew and I had been welcomed with open arms, Masha being the guest of honor, of course. I suspected any Guaviva with their ability to communicate with machines would have been in the spotlight. Masha was happier than I’d ever seen her … again, of course. The Gartian world was a marvel to me, not just the Gartians themselves, but the planet. It also was mostly machine, like its creators. But it was bright, and clean … there was no industrial feel to it like a space station. It was stunning—absolutely beautiful in every way imaginable—and it made me curl into myself just a bit more.
It all made me think of my old life on New Earth. Why hadn’t my parents wanted me? Sure, I’d tested out as a normal human, Species Class 1, when most spliced humans were expected to be Class 2 or 3 at the very least. Wasn’t I worth unconditional love, though? They’d just turned their backs on me like I was nothing.
“Jane?” Zula’s voice cut into my interlude of self-pity. “Dar was just explaining to us how their air filtration system works. He said they’re installing a similar type of technology on The Pittsburgh.”
I cleared my throat, focusing in on the large male standing in front of us. “Right. Yes, I was listening.” Except I hadn’t been at all. Everything had been a blur since I’d seen what the Gartians were really like. I couldn’t decide if I was jealous or I hated them. Maybe the two went hand in hand? How screwed up emotionally was I that I envied a species that had been ravaged by a plague? And yet they still thrived. The rumors of their failing mental states had no basis in reality. I wondered why they let the lies persist. I had my theories, but I was too chicken shit to woman up and ask.
“When a phoenix finds its twin flame, they love unconditionally.” A voice that sounded suspiciously like Ash’s slithered through my mind. Goose bumps erupted across my skin, my vision faltering. I’m having some kind of auditory hallucination. Yep, that’s it. I forced my body into submission, demanding for it to be calm. I waited, and no other phantom words from the very man who I was tracking were heard. I heaved a sigh of relief. I haven’t been getting enough sleep lately. Yep, that’s the problem.
I blinked repeatedly, trying to focus on Zula, who was saying something to me, but I had absolutely no idea about what. I leaned forward, narrowing my eyes in an attempt to read her lips. Tamzea stepped in front of Zula, her features scrunched up with concern.
I swayed, dark spots dancing in my field of vision. My knees buckled, and the ground came up to meet me.
Screaming, I threw my head back as pleasure assaulted my system. Heat suffused every part of me. Colors exploded behind my eyelids while my body quivered, sweat coating my skin. “Wh-what’s … ” I couldn’t even form a coherent sentence. The last thing I remembered was being on the Gartian planet with my crew, and the next …
“I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again … You taste so fucking good.”
Well, and then the next moment … apparently I was being eaten alive, but in a good way. I didn’t have to raise my head to know who was languorously torturing me with his tongue between my thighs. I must have passed out, and I was again having an erotic dream about Ash. No one else had ever so completely taken over my psyche. “Stop! Just— Aaaahhh!” My legs trembled when Ash sucked on my clit.
“I don’t think you really want me to.” A whimper escaped my chest as his words vibrated against me. I could hear the smirk in his voice. I kind of hated him for it, especially because he was right.
I lurched to the side, trying to roll away from him, squeezing my eyes shut. “Wake up, wake up … just wake up, damnit.”
“I don’t think you want that either.” Ash’s lips brushed my ear as his body pinned me down. “Now open up those beautiful eyes, and look at me,” he rumbled low.
I immediately complied; I couldn’t help myself. His sculpted face, high cheekbones, and full, supple lips that were glistening with my juices took up my vision. I squirmed underneath him, enthralled by the flames dancing in his eyes. “I need to see you again in the flesh, so to speak. And it needs to be soon. I’m getting tired of just this. We started something that can only be finished in the physical plane.”
I blinked rapidly, trying to process what he was saying. Shouldn’t I have more control of my own dream like I had before? Ash was getting awfully pushy for a figment of my imagination. “Get off of me.” I shoved at his chest.
The muscles in Ash’s jaw ticked as his gaze ran over the contours of my face. “So stubborn. You don’t even know what’s happening between us.”
“Nothing’s happening. You’re a figment of my apparently sex-deprived imagination.”
His hands slid up to capture my wrists, and I lurched up to bite him. He shifted just out of reach with barely any effort.
In fact, my aggression merely made him chuckle. I couldn’t help the goose bumps that skittered across my flesh. Ash leaned in to whisper in my ear, “I thought you wanted to feel connected. I can give you everything you’ve ever wanted, and things you didn’t even realize you needed.”
“I don’t want anything from you,” I spat. It was a bold faced lie, and I had a feeling he knew it.
He moved his face away from me, his lips curling up. “I guess it’s true what they say.”
“What?”
“Nothing good comes easy.” Ash released me, fading away right before my eyes, even as I took a swing at him.
Jolting awake, I sat straight up to take in my surroundings. I was in my quarters on The Pittsburgh. The familiarity of my Earth things normally made me feel safe—which was probably why I’d been brought back on the ship in the first place—but something had shifted in me. Instead of comfort, all the items from a planet I would never know taunted me with a history I would never actually be able to connect with. I was alone. Utterly and completely alone. I had no real family, and no ties that truly bonded. It was something I’d always wanted, and yet never shared with anyone. It was my weakness, and suddenly something about Ash was making me think more deeply about my issues. No. It’s only a weakness if I let it be. I’ve turned it into my strength.
I collected Earth items, dressing in days-gone-by clothing because I wanted to define my own past … and therefore my own future. The rejections I’d suffered being raised on New Earth were just distant memories. They would never be allowed to affect any decisions in my new life.
If some misguided part of me felt some kind of connection with Ash after being with him sexually, then I had to focus on capturing him even more. I needed to turn him over for the bounty on his head, not just for my pride, but because if he was someone that I could develop a relationship with—as twisted as that thought was—then I had to remove any possibility of him being in my life … permanently. I would never let myself be vulnerable to a romantic-type relationship again. I’d learned all my lessons from New Earth very well.
Standing, I marched for my door just as it slid open, Tamzea stepping through to narrowly miss colliding with me. “Hey! Again with the not knocking?” I snapped.
Tamzea met my gaze, smiling demurely. “I’m glad to see you’re up. How are you feeling?” Her hands flitted around me, checking and assessing.
I slapped at them with my own. “I’m fine. Care to fill me in on what you know … about what happened and everything else that I missed while I took my unscheduled nap?”
Tamzea pushed past me to move into my room. “Have a seat, Jane. We need to talk.”
I grimaced. Was there something actually wrong with me? I hadn’t considered the possibility. Looking at Tamzea’s suddenly serious face caused a lump to form in my throat. “Okay,” I squeaked. Maybe I had some kind of incurable disease or— “Oh my God! I have G-Pox, don’t I?”
“What? Jane, calm down.”
But it was too late. I was already working myself into a panic. It wasn’t completely unrealistic to think that maybe I had some Gartian DNA. And if I had even a smidgen of it in my system then I could be infected. “Am I going to rot away?” I clutched at the wall, and stumbled face first onto my bed. I sucked in ragged breaths as my mind conjured up images of me with half of my face replaced by metal. I gasped. “I’m going to be hideous, aren’t I? If I manage to survive at all.”
An abrupt burst of laughter met my ears, surrounding me in its mocking tone. Lifting my head from my comforter, I found Tamzea sprawled on the floor doubled over, her arms wrapped around her middle, as the offending hysterical laughter erupted from her. The unprofessional response to my dilemma was disconcerting, to say the least. My face flushed with anger. “How dare you laugh at my condition?” I hissed.
“Jane, how … just— Wh-why would you think that?” she sputtered.
I raised my arms, and then let them fall in exasperation. “Then tell me what’s wrong with me!” I flopped back down on my bed. I was beginning to feel like an idiot, and I didn’t much appreciate Tamzea in that moment for making me feel that way. A good healer would never laugh at something like that. Maybe I needed to trade her in for someone with more compassion. After she told me what was really wrong with me, I was seriously going to consider it.
Tamzea straightened herself out, her lips pressing together to form a thin line. She wasn’t fooling me, though; I could still see the humor dancing in her lavender eyes. “What I wanted to talk to you about was this obsession you’ve developed with capturing Ash.”
My nostrils flared, and I dug my fingers into my pillow. “It has nothing to do with him. It has to do with the mone—”
“Save it.” All mirth had drained from Tamzea’s face as she raised her hand to shut me up. “You were muttering his name while you were unconscious. You also insisted on going after him while you were in some kind of feverish state. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
My mouth fell open, just hanging there for a moment. “Whaaat?” I finally managed. “What exactly do you mean I tried going after him in a feverish state?”
“It’s like you weren’t there, almost as if you were sleepwalking. Your eyes were open and you responded somewhat to external stimulus such as light and touch, but it was as if your subconscious was elsewhere. I actually had to sedate you to keep you from leaving. Not to mention that you were burning up with a fever at the time.”
Ash’s comment about our encounters not being dreams niggled at the back of my mind, but I stubbornly pushed it aside. “Obviously I had some kind of illness that c
aused the fever and I’m just really … really focused on getting Ash— I mean the money. Ash equals that gigantic bounty from the UGFS as you well know.” Yeah, it sounded pretty lame to me, too. I studied my nails in hopes of avoiding Tamzea’s gaze.
“Normally I don’t mind letting you hang on to some of your more harmless delusions, Jane. But this time … we both know something more is going on.” She slid onto the bed next to me, taking my hands within hers. “Please, Jane. I’m not just this ship’s doctor. I’m your friend. Talk to me.”
“Fine,” I grated. Maybe a part of the reason why I felt so disconnected from even the people I considered my friends and chosen family was because I refused to let them in. I was guarded, and I found it exceedingly difficult to talk about my feelings even when I wanted to. I need to bite the bullet and come clean about Ash.
I swallowed, and then cleared my throat. “I’ve been having these very realistic dreams about me and Ash … er—” I tugged my hands away from Tamzea, flicking my gaze to a poster depicting an Earth landscape, wishing I could actually be there. “Having sex. I’m having dreams about having sex with Ash. And earlier on the Gartian planet, I swore I heard his voice in my head. So go ahead and say it, I’ve finally gone and completely lost it.”
“Hmmm … ” Tamzea leaned forward, placing her fingertips on my temples. “I wonder … ” She peered intently at me like I was a puzzle to be solved. And maybe I was.
“Can you heal mental disorders?”
“Shhh.”
I scowled, hating that she’d shushed me like a small child, but who was I to argue? After all, I was the insane one apparently. “Weeell?” Patience was not one of my best attributes. In fact, I was pretty sure I didn’t possess any at all.
Tamzea stood abruptly, heading for the door with jerky motions. “I need to consult with Zula. Stay put. And don’t mind the noise, the Gartians are still working on the ship. They know you’re in here and have assured us that they can work around you until you’re well enough to go back to their planet.”
