by Elena Aitken
Zoe couldn’t help but laugh. “I don’t know. Right now, it sure feels like we’re crazy. I mean, we barely know anything about each other. That feels pretty crazy.”
“There’s nothing I could possibly learn about you that would make me feel any different,” he said seriously. “Nothing.”
Zoe swallowed hard. There might be one thing. She’d done a good job pushing the concern about her fertility from her mind, but she wasn’t stupid. She wouldn’t be able to ignore it forever.
She snuggled closer and let a finger draw small circles on his chest.
“Can you tell me about her?” she asked after a moment. It was another thing she’d been avoiding. Not because she was jealous of the woman who came before her, but mostly because Zoe couldn’t help but think it would be a sensitive subject. How could it not be? But she needn’t have worried because Gabe didn’t seem disturbed by the question. In fact, he didn’t even seem surprised by it.
“Marie and I met when we were kids,” he started without hesitation. “Our families were friends. We kind of grew up together, I guess. I remember thinking of her mom, Maryann, as my second mom for a while.” He chuckled a little. “In fact, I think I actually loved her more than my own mom back then, too.”
Zoe made a mental note to ask him about his parents later. For now, she just listened.
“It’s funny because for the longest time, when I was young, I actually thought of Marie more as a little sister than anything else.”
“Was it your families?” It wasn’t unusual in bear clans for families to arrange the mates for their children in order to keep bloodlines strong, or to build alliances. And although her own parents hadn’t ever pushed that on her or Chloe, they were black bears and she’d heard stories about how aggressive grizzlies could be about making matches for their children.
“No.” Gabe shook his head beneath her. “It wasn’t like that at all. Our families never pressured us to mate. If anything, it was the opposite. My mom and dad would talk about how Marie’s family was cursed.”
“Cursed?” Her finger stopped drawing circles momentarily. “What do you mean by cursed?”
“It was silly. At least, I thought it was.” His voice lowered as he continued. “It was said that when a Grant mated, it would end in tragedy. Marie’s dad died when she was only a young cub, and her grandmother too. She’d died long before Marie was born. In fact, if you looked hard enough, you could find a whole line of Grant grizzlies who’d died way too young. All were mated. With one cub.”
“That’s crazy!”
“Is it?” Gabe put his hand over hers. “Marie died. And if you ask my parents, it was all my fault.”
Zoe slipped from his arm and propped herself up with an elbow so she could look into his eyes properly. She expected to see pain and hurt reflected in his dark eyes, but there was nothing there but affection and acceptance. “Why would it be your fault?”
“Because I mated her,” he said simply. “If I hadn’t have done that, she’d still be alive.”
“She would have mated someone else.”
“Maybe.”
His simple answer prompted a new question. “Were you fated?” she asked before she could stop herself. “You and Marie? Was it like it was with us?” She braced herself for the answer, because for some reason she was worried that he’d say yes. And so what if it had been the same? Would it lessen what Zoe had with Gabe? She couldn’t be sure but she had to know.
But she didn’t have to give it any further thought because Gabe’s answer came swift and sure. “Not. At. All.” He sat up and grabbed her hands in his. “What you and I have…I’ve never experienced anything like it before.” He looked straight into her eyes as he spoke and even in the dim light, Zoe could see the honesty and passion reflected in his gaze. “With you, it’s…” He shook his head and took a deep breath. “It’s like a magnetic pull I couldn’t break if I was the strongest man on earth. From the moment I laid eyes on you, I—no.” His lips twitched up into a grin. “From the moment I scented you, I had to have you. It was a primal urge and I knew that if I didn’t make you mine, I would go crazy from the need.”
As he spoke, her own need built within her like an electric charge that raced through her veins.
“With Marie, there was affection and love,” he continued. “But nothing about our mating was instinctual or fated. Not at all.”
“If it wasn’t everything, then why mate?”
Gabe shrugged a little and nodded. “It seemed like the next thing for us to do. Like, the next logical step. I’d just finished my time at the police academy and she was almost done with college. She was going to be a teacher,” he continued. “We cared about each other and…well…it just kind of happened one night.”
Zoe nodded. She’d heard plenty of stories from her friends and cousins that sounded very similar. The concept of fated mates was more often than not considered a myth. Now she knew it wasn’t. Far from it. But Gabe’s story didn’t surprise her.
“Neither of us even really thought about it,” Gabe continued. “It was the same night Ashton was conceived and it just sort of happened. Now I wish it hadn’t.”
Zoe squeezed his hands. “Why? Why do you wish it hadn’t happened?”
He looked down to their joined hands and after a moment when his eyes met hers again, they were full of sadness and regret. “Because,” he said slowly. “I killed her.”
Gabe had never said the words out loud before. Sure, he’d heard them plenty. Mostly from his own mother and father, who, upon learning they’d mated, yelled at him for enacting the curse that would surely be the end of Marie.
But Marie and Gabe hadn’t believed in the curse. They’d laughed at it.
After all, how could mating and having a cub be anything but fantastic?
And it was. Their life together had been great. Gabe graduated from the police academy and got a job in their small town. Marie meant to finish school, but her pregnancy left her exhausted and she dropped out with only a semester to go. But motherhood agreed with her. Marie had blossomed into a fabulous mother and Ashton had been her entire life.
As time went on, the two of them would laugh at Gabe’s still superstitious parents. “So much for a curse,” they’d say. “Silly oldies.”
But the Wilders still weren’t laughing. They loved their new little grandson and relished the time they got to spend with him, but still they never tired of telling Gabe what a mistake he’d made and how he’d be sorry one day. Even when the young couple announced that they were pregnant once again, his parents weren’t convinced that Gabe and Marie had snuck past the curse. “Only one cub will be born, and then the mated Grant grizzly will die,” they said over and over.
It was morbid and annoying. Besides, Gabe and Marie were untouchable. With every day that passed, they got more and more cocky and Gabe in particular even grew more reckless. He’d drive too fast, pushing the limits of their truck on the twisty mountain roads, but Marie would throw back her head and together they would laugh in the face of the destiny everyone was so sure they faced. She would be the first of the Grant clan to break the curse.
And then she’d died.
“I was driving too fast,” Gabe recalled the story to Zoe. “I always drove too fast. And that day it wasn’t raining, or snowing at all. In fact, it was a beautiful day with blue skies and…” He dropped his head as he remembered how they’d been on their way home from the doctor’s appointment where they’d shown Ashton the ultrasound of his baby brother. It was going to be another boy.
He tried not to remember the image of the little bean that would have become his youngest son. They hadn’t even had a chance to decide on a name for him before he was gone. If he let himself, Gabe would drive himself crazy wondering whether he would have been dark like his brother, or fairer, like his mother. Would he have been sensitive? A musician? Or rough and tumble like Ashton? There were so many questions that he’d never have answers for, and it brought him to tears ever
y time he allowed his mind to go to those dark corners.
“Gabe,” Zoe said tenderly, her voice thick with emotion. “You don’t have to—”
“Yes.” He looked up into her piercing green eyes and everything was okay. She was his. They were fated and it would be okay. There was no curse with her. They were meant to be and as terrible as he’d always feel about Marie, he knew she’d never wanted him to live his life with the curse weighing over him. Not when she was alive, and especially not when she was gone. “I need to tell you. It’s okay,” he said. “I’m okay.
“I lost control of the car,” he continued the story. “And you know what the crazy thing is?” Zoe tilted her head. “I knew,” Gabe said. “The moment the car started spinning, I knew it was the curse. And I know that she knew, too.” He knew it wasn’t rational and no matter how many times he remembered the accident and understood that it was impossible that in that split second, Marie would have had time to look at him and that they could possibly have exchanged a look that communicated what they’d probably always known and had only been trying to convince themselves otherwise, that the curse had finally caught up with them, he knew it was true.
“Gabe.” Zoe scooted closer to him in the bed and put her hand on his leg. “You couldn’t have—”
“No.” He interrupted her softly. “We knew. It was the curse. She died because I mated her. I was reckless. I lost my mate and my unborn son. It was my fault,” he said. “And my parents never let me forget it. So as soon as we could, Ashton and I moved here, to Boulder Creek. Marie’s mom was already here and she’s been a major help with Ashton.”
They were silent for a moment as Zoe absorbed what he’d just told her. It only occurred to Gabe, belatedly, that he hadn’t really answered her question. “I guess that doesn’t really tell you much about her.” He smiled. “She was a great person,” he continued. “A fantastic mother and my best friend. She was my mate, but like I said before, as much as I cared about Marie, what we shared was nothing like what I share with you.” He reached out for Zoe’s chin and tilted it up so she was looking in his eyes. With any other woman, he would expect to see jealousy there, or hurt as she listened to him speak about another woman. But all he saw in his mate’s eyes was love. “You and me, we’re—”
“Fated.” She kissed him then and climbed up on top of him until she straddled him. His hands came up to her hips and spread out over her smooth, bare skin. “I’m sorry,” she whispered between kisses as she worked her way down his chest. “About what you went through and losing the baby, too. I can’t even imagine that kind of pain.” She stroked her hand down his cheek.
“I’m not going to lie to you and say it’s been easy,” he said. “Because it hasn’t. I feel bad every day. Every single time I look at Ashton, I feel guilty. He’ll never know his brother. Hell, he doesn’t even remember knowing that he was going to be a big brother. He was so young when the accident happened. In a way, I think it was a blessing. I know it was a blessing.” He dropped his head and shook it. “But at the same time…”
Zoe kissed him gently and looked into his eyes again. “Gabe, I think I should tell you—”
“No.” He cut her off, because he was done talking about sad things or things that couldn’t be changed. “No more talk about the past.” He lifted her so she was directly above him, before flipping her over so he was on top of her. “It’s time to look to the future. Our future. I believe everything happens the way it was meant to. I have Ashton and now I have you. Soon, I’ll put a cub in your belly.” He pressed a hand to her stomach and spanned his fingers over her soft skin. “Our baby. Ashton will know what it’s like to be a big brother, and the curse will only be a distant memory. We can’t change the past, it’ll always be there, but now, we have the future.”
It was his turn to kiss her then, a task he took to with enthusiasm. And when he bent to place a series of kisses on her stomach where hopefully soon their baby would be safely growing inside, Gabe was so consumed by love and passion for his woman that he completely missed the small sob that escaped her lips.
Chapter Eleven
They should have been exhausted after a night of no sleep, but by the time the sun slipped over the mountains and light began to filter through the curtains of Gabe’s bedroom, Zoe was reenergized and ready for the day. In fact, she hadn’t felt so light and full of energy in a long time. Maybe ever.
She rolled over to press a kiss to the tip of Gabe’s nose. He’d only just fallen asleep, and although she would have loved to wake him if only to hear his voice again or feel the touch of his fingers on her skin because she knew she’d never be able to get enough of him, she also enjoyed watching him sleep.
Besides, it would be fun to surprise him with a full breakfast when he woke.
Pancakes or eggs?
She had no idea what he and Ashton would prefer. The night before, that might have concerned her, but between their lovemaking sessions, they’d talked and although it had only been one night, Zoe already knew so much more about Gabe.
The rest, she’d learn.
With one last look at her sleeping mate, Zoe slipped from the bed. She found one of Gabe’s T-shirts and slipped it over her head. She’d never considered herself petite by any stretch, but his shirt fell nearly halfway down her thighs. It would be more than decent if Ashton woke up before she had a chance to change.
In the kitchen, she nosed around and found coffee filters and grounds. She set a pot to brewing before investigating in the fridge. She had her head stuffed deep inside when a little voice startled her.
“Dad keeps the cereal in the cupboard,” Ashton said. “But the milk is in there.”
Zoe stood back, the jug of milk in her hand. “I found it.” She grinned. “But I was thinking…” She walked over to the boy and ruffled his hair with her free hand. “Maybe instead of cereal this morning, we could have pancakes? Or eggs?”
His eyes, miniature versions of his father’s, grew wide. “No cereal?”
She shook her head cautiously and waited.
“Pancakes?” Ashton asked tentatively. “Or eggs?”
“Or both?” Zoe shrugged. “What’s your favorite?”
“Both.” Ashton jumped up and down. “Definitely both.”
Zoe laughed. It was clear that for as great a father as Gabe obviously was, he likely wasn’t the best cook. “How about you help me out?”
Ashton agreed readily and the two of them set to work preparing a big breakfast.
It didn’t take long for them to fall into an easy rhythm. Ashton was a quick learner when it came to measuring and he was eager to learn. More importantly, he seemed excited for Zoe to be there. And not at all curious or confused as to why she would have slept over.
In any other circumstance, it would have felt strange to her, and she would never have spent the night. After all, there was a child involved. But it wasn’t any other circumstance, and there was nothing usual about what was happening.
They weren’t just any ordinary hook-up or relationship or whatever other descriptor you wanted to use. They were mates. And more than that, they were fated mates.
Which was why everything felt so absolutely right. As if they’d all been waiting their entire lives to wake up and make breakfast together. More than once, Zoe caught herself looking at Ashton in wonder as he stood guard over the rounds of batter she’d poured on the griddle. He had his spatula at the ready, waiting for Zoe to give the command that they were ready to flip.
“You’re a pretty quick learner,” she told him as she watched him flip the last of the pancakes. “Maybe you can teach your dad a few things.”
With his spatula still in his hand, Ashton spun quickly on the chair he stood on and wrapped his arms around her. “Thank you, Zoe.” He had a remarkably strong grip for someone his size—then again, he was a grizzly shifter—but it wasn’t his hug that brought tears to Zoe’s eyes. It was the sentiment behind it.
She had no idea how to handle such a s
ituation. Or really anything about this situation. Should she try to tell him about what was happening? That she was his dad’s mate?
But what about his mother? She’d been his mate, too.
Should she tell him that she was never going to replace his mother? No. That wasn’t right.
There were so many questions, so many different ways to approach it.
In the end, Zoe did the only thing she knew how to do. She followed her heart.
She wrapped her own arms around the boy and hugged him back. “Thank you.” She gave him a kiss on the top of his head. He smelled of campfire smoke, marshmallow, and little boy. Just like spending time with Gabe, being with Ashton just felt right. There was nothing more natural.
“I’m glad you’re here,” Ashton said when he unwound himself from Zoe’s arms.
“You are?”
He nodded and turned back to his pancakes. “You make things brighter.”
He probably shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but Gabe couldn’t help it. When he’d woken to the delicious scent of coffee, followed by fresh pancakes, his stomach grumbled with need and he’d followed his nose to the kitchen. But the second he saw Zoe and Ashton together, all thoughts of breakfast and his empty stomach vanished as he watched his mate with his son.
His heart melted. Any last reservations he might have had about mating so quickly and moving so fast with Zoe vanished as he watched how easily the two of them worked together in the kitchen. Ashton was so accepting of Zoe’s presence, and not only that, he really seemed to genuinely like her.
Was it possible that children felt the same natural pull toward mates the way that their parents did? And that Ashton was drawn toward Zoe because she was Gabe’s mate?
He’d never had any experience with this type of situation before. Hell, he’d barely had any experience with mates, let alone second mates or fated mates. And none of it with a child before. He was completely in uncharted territory.
