by Kait Gamble
“But why not tell me once we’d gotten serious?”
He shook his head sadly. “I don’t know. I would guess that I planned to. I was probably about to. Once I knew that you loved me for me and not for my wealth or connections.” Alex lifted his head to look at her questioningly.
“I did.” She’d loved him more than she thought she was capable of loving anyone.
“But not anymore.”
Maia wasn’t sure how to respond to that. She was falling for him again, of that she was sure. But they were both very different people now. Who knew if they would able to make things work? Should they even try? Perhaps this was better off as closure to a bad phase of her life. Something that she should enjoy for now then just move on. She had become so bad at gauging relationships that she couldn’t say what was going on between them.
“That’s so unfair. We’ve only just become reacquainted. And until now, you didn’t even truly believe I was telling you the truth.” And that hurt. She’d hated him for a very long time. But knowing that hate was based on a misconception… It changed everything. But even a place like this and fantastic sex with the one man who she’d ever truly loved wouldn’t erase the pain that quickly. In her mind, they might as well be starting from square one.
He regarded her silently.
Because she already knew the answer was no, Maia asked, “Do you love me?” Alex clenched his jaw, but no reply was forthcoming. Just as she’d expected. “Then you can’t expect me to be able to say that I love you, can you?”
Point proven, she sat back a little. The fantasy vacation was truly over.
Alex wasn’t happy to let her shift away and took her hand in his, keeping her from moving too far out of reach. “I know that I’m not ready for this to end.”
She wasn’t either. But were they deluding themselves? “Maybe we should take things a little slower.”
He frowned but he nodded, taking his hand back. “If that’s what you wish.”
Maia noted the way his face blanked and the light in his eyes faded a little. “You’ve just had a huge bombshell dropped on you.”
His eyes narrowed. “Don’t pin this on me. I know what I can handle. If you want to turn tail and run, just say so.”
Irked by his words as much as the truth behind them, she sighed. “I’m not running. I just need a little space.”
“Very well.” He stood and regarded her grimly.
She followed him and got to her feet but stepped in his path when he tried to walk past her. “Alex. We both need a minute. You can’t be fine after hearing all that and discussing it brings back some bad memories. It was a very dark time for me. You understand that, don’t you?”
He glowered at her. “Of course I do. I’m not a monster.”
“Then could you please just take a moment and breathe?”
“There are so many unanswered questions.” He took her hands and stared her straight in the eyes. “I dislike not knowing. I hate that I wasn’t there for you. I hate myself for not being able to remember. You are the only one who can answer most of my questions.”
Maia couldn’t say no to that. She just wished there was a way to show him everything without having to be the one to tell him. “Then ask.”
“How can I when you shut down at the slightest provocation?”
“All I said was that I needed a minute. Besides…” Maia tightened her grip on his hands. “Everything is out in the open now. So if you have something to say, to ask, just do it.”
Alex scrubbed his hand over his face. “I don’t want to do it like this. Come.”
Maia stayed rooted to the spot. “Come where?”
He tugged on their linked hands. “Will you just humor me?”
She hesitated only a fraction of a second before allowing him to lead her to the boxes. He silently pulled out the candles and the prepared meals. The food was quickly laid out on the coffee table, then he lit the candles one by one.
“Please sit.” He pulled out a bottle of wine and deftly uncorked it, pouring her glass first, then his own. “That’s better.”
Was it? She sat and lifted the lid to the meal. It was simple, a crisp salad and chilled chicken, but it was their proposed topic of conversation that left her cold. Still, with the lit candles, it looked wonderful.
Alex sat and picked up his glass. He sat silently watching her a moment before taking a long drink. “I don’t want to bring back bad memories. The last thing I want to do is hurt you more. But could you please tell me how we met?”
Maia remembered it well. The memory brought a small smile to her lips. “I actually tripped and fell into you. I burned you with my coffee.”
“So you throwing drinks at me has been ongoing since the beginning.” Alex chuckled.
Heat crept into her cheeks. “Well, that time, it was an accident. I was nervous about the first week at the university. It was the first time I was away from my home and family.”
He smiled sympathetically. “So how did I react?”
“You were really nice, actually. Even offered to buy me another coffee.” That had turned into their first coffee date of many. “I agreed only when you let me pay for your dry cleaning. That cost a bit more than I was expecting. I had to skip lunch for a week.”
Alex shook his head. “I wouldn’t have let you do that had I’d known.”
Maia knew that. He wasn’t one to let people suffer if he could help. “It was a point of pride for me. I ruined your shirt. I was going to fix it.”
They ate silently for a little while. Maia figured Alex was slowly assimilating the information, spreading out his questions so she wouldn’t get too upset. She wasn’t sure if it was better to slowly let the feelings back in with the memories or to tell him everything in one fell swoop and deal with the fallout afterward. But she complied. It was great to finally let everything out.
Talking it out with him allowed her to remember all the good times they’d had. The fun that their younger selves could afford that seemed silly now. It put a smile on her face recalling just how young and in love they had been. Up until his disappearance, what they’d had was good.
* * * *
By the time they finished the last of the wine, Maia had told him about their first year together. Alex listened intently, asking questions every now and then. But for the most part he sat silently and absorbed everything she told him, processing it.
Maia followed his lead when he started clearing up the plates. They stayed silent up until he started wiping the tabletop, and she couldn’t take it any longer.
Maia delicately tugged the cloth from his hands and dropped it to the table then took his hands and tugged on them until he looked at her. “What are you thinking?”
He looked at her with sad eyes and sighed heavily. “That if it wasn’t for my accident we would have really had a chance at happily ever after.”
Maia’s stomach churned with his words. She didn’t want to think about what ifs. “Can you tell me what happened to you?”
“It’s only fair.” He led her over to the couch. But instead of sitting, he got down on his knees in front of her. He smirked wryly when she hesitated a little. “I want you to feel this.” Taking her hand, he pressed it to the back of his head to follow a jagged scar that ran up nearly to his right temple.
She traced the horrific reminder of his accident that had been hidden beneath his hair. Maia had no idea it had been that bad. “Oh, my God.” Tears welled up in her eyes as she let her fingers travel up and down the raised line.
“So you understand just how terrible the accident was.” He kept hold of her hand when he sat next to her. “You remember I returned home because my mother was ill.” He continued when she nodded. “She passed away not too long after I arrived.”
Maia clutched his hand. “I’m so sorry.”
His lips tilted in a small smile of thanks. “I have no recollection of the accident or much leading up to it. Father tells me that the night it happened I’d taken off full of
sadness and rage and with nowhere to channel it. I hadn’t had anything to drink. I was just blinded by anger and helplessness. From the police reports, it seemed I tried to take a corner too fast. And since the corner was on the side of a cliff…”
Her breath hitched. It was a miracle he was alive.
“If I had taken just a little care… If I hadn’t been such an idiot… Things would have turned out very differently.”
She let go of his hands to cup his cheeks and turn his face toward her. “It’s not your fault.”
“It feels like it.”
“Can’t we just leave it up to fate? It might have torn us apart, but we’ve managed to find each other again. What matters is what we do with the time we have now.”
Alex’s gaze flickered down to her lips before catching her eyes again. “Something I intend to make the most of.”
And he kissed her.
Chapter Thirteen
Alex plundered her mouth her with a desperation that made her heart ache. She hated that he took all the responsibility on himself. Even if she did the same at one time, knowing what she did now, what he had been through, she could never blame him for any of it.
Maia tangled her fingers in his hair, sliding over the ridge of the scar. She traced the raised length of it, the horror of what he had been through bringing tears to her eyes. She met his biting kisses fiercely, glad that they had this moment together. As unlikely as it was, they’d managed to find each other again. Perhaps it was time she started believing in fate once more.
She pulled away from him and smirked at the questioning glance he gave her. She had no plans on stopping him. His expression turned to dawning appreciation when she slipped the straps off her shoulders and let the dress glide down her body to pool at her feet. Seeing as she hadn’t been able to find any underwear that suited the occasion, she was bare beneath.
Biting back a moan, he returned his hands to her skin, caressing everything within reach as he made his way down her body. His head dipped as he took the aching tip of one breast between his lips, flicking at the hardened bud with his tongue on his way down.
He slid his hands down her sides and hooked around her hips. Alex used his knees to slide her feet apart so he could settle his mouth between her thighs.
Maia’s head fell back as he opened his mouth against her. She wavered under his erotic onslaught. Her hands returned to his hair out of passion as much as to keep upright.
Alex skillfully used a combination of his mouth, tongue and fingers to bring her to a shattering climax that left her reeling and breathless.
When she finally came back to herself, she found herself sprawled across his lap on the floor. The storm still raged outside the building, but she felt calm. Languid. And it was no wonder. The man under her had completely shattered her senses. And from the insistent movement of his hands and hips, he wasn’t about to let up.
With a quick shift, she straddled his hips as he quickly shucked his jeans and donned a condom. Then he was arching into her in one long thrust. He gripped her hips and started rocking a pace that had her working to keep up and beating him to a spectacular orgasm just moments before he joined her.
She fell against him, replete and exhilarated at the same time. Alex smiled up at her, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. It came across as resigned. Tired.
Maia wasn’t going to let him slip back into a funk. “Come on. The floor’s cold.” But instead of leading him down to the bedroom, she pulled him over to the couch. “We can watch the storm.”
* * * *
And that was what they did for the next two days. They talked and watched the storm ebb and rage, as they indulged in each other as often as they could. With everything out in the open, Maia felt as if they were starting with a clean slate. But she couldn’t figure out what was going through Alex’s head.
When they were intimate, it was as if she was the only thing in the world to him. But afterward she would catch him in moments with a lost, almost haunted look on his face. When she asked what was bothering him, he would simply snap out of it and kiss her until she couldn’t think straight. She would let him get away with it for now, but she would hash it out with him before they returned to the real world.
A look out of the window now reminded her that they didn’t have much time left in seclusion. Soon they would be back in their lives and who knew how that would change things.
She watched morosely as the slowing rain dripped off the edge of the roof. The wind was calming. The ocean was returning to its former crystalline blue and the sky was no longer an ominous gray. Everything was going back to the way it should be.
Why was that such an unsettling idea?
“Maia?”
She turned to find Alex holding the satellite phone. “Hey.”
He noticed her mood. She could see it in his eyes. There was a pause as he studied her. Alex held up the phone. “I just got word that the weather has cleared enough for us to leave.”
It seemed that he wasn’t as reluctant to return to their lives as she was. Her heart felt as though it was filling with lead as she nodded. “I’ll get packed.”
“Maia?”
“I’m fine. I’ll just get my things.”
“Hey, now.” He deftly stepped into her path and swept her into his arms. “Nothing needs to change when we get back.”
She had to smile a little at his optimism. “Of course it does. We both have to return to our lives once we leave this place. I’ve already done my articles for your hotels. Once I’ve sent them off, I have to get to the next destination.”
Alex’s eyebrows dropped thoughtfully as he ignored her attempt at changing the subject. “We will make things work. I can visit you and vice versa.”
“Yeah.” It came out even less enthusiastically than she felt and Alex picked up on it if his frown was anything to go by. Thankfully, he let it drop. At least for the moment.
* * * *
The flight back was quiet. Maia took the easy way out and pretended to edit and write on her laptop while Alex seemed quite happy to let her bury her head in the sand as he made a series of calls ranging from arrangements for a ride from the airport to various calls that she wasn’t proficient enough in French to translate.
She chalked them up to business. To ask would prove that she wasn’t as intent on her work as she made out to be. She did hear the name Angelique mentioned a few times, though, as well as her own. And not knowing why their names were being uttered made her stomach clench.
By the time they made it through the airport and were being loaded into a limo, Maia’s stomach was in knots and her mood had soured considerably.
“You’ve been quiet,” said Alex as he settled into the plush interior next to her. “Everything okay?”
She’d sent off her articles to her editor and already got a gushing reception for them. Her next assignment had been arranged and all she had to do now was gather her things from the hotel and she’d be ready to take off again. Everything was exactly as it should be. Everything was in order, but she felt as if her life was inside out. “I got everything sent off and I got my next assignment.”
He frowned. “Already? Where are you headed next?”
“Mexico. There’s a new resort opening up on the Riviera Maya. I leave pretty much as soon as I can get packed and back to the airport.”
Alex kept his eyes on her as he pressed a button and said two sharp words to the driver. The car almost immediately swerved to the curb and stopped.
“Alex? What are you doing?”
His presence filled the small space. “You can’t go yet. We need to figure this out.”
She pressed her fingers to her temples. “We’ve been over this. We can figure out whatever this is as we go.”
Alex gritted his teeth. “And cram in a relationship where and when it fits? What you’re doing is running.”
She straightened her spine and stared right back at him. “I’m trying to be an adult. We’re not kids anymore a
nd we can’t just expect things to fall together just because we want them to.”
“And nothing happens for people who just wait for it to fall into place.” He ran his fingers over her cheek.
She sighed. “You said yourself that we can visit each other. Why don’t you come with me? You could call it a research trip.”
Alex frowned, shaking his head. “You know I can’t right now. I have to oversee the development of another property.”
Maia crossed her arms and sat back to stare at him. “But it’s okay to ask me to hit pause on my life so that it’ll fit in with yours?”
He scowled at her, but it softened as he pulled her close. “Of course not. I just thought we would have more time together before you flitted off again.”
Maia wound her arms around his neck. “I guess I don’t have to rush off right away. I’m sure I could spare a few hours if there was something worth my time.”
“Only a few hours?” Alex punched the ceiling a couple of times and the car started moving again.
She shrugged. “I guess I could adjust my schedule accordingly. Depending on what comes up.”
Smirking, he twisted her under him, making very sure he proved that there was something definitely up. “We have at least thirty minutes before we get to the hotel.”
“Oh?” Maia wriggled under him. “I guess we’d better make the most of it.”
He didn’t need any more encouragement. Impatient, Alex pushed her top up so he could caress her breasts through the thin silk barrier of her bra. He nipped the delicate skin under her ear. “I can’t get enough of you, Maia.”
