I laugh. “No, no. Gabe was, and I was a United Nations volunteer. He and I got trapped in a cave for a few days by insurgents and he was shot trying to find a way out.”
I look at Gabe, who is staring at the table, drawing little circles with his index finger. We’re all quiet for a moment before he realizes the ball is back in his court.
He takes a deep breath. “Yeah, so six months later after I got discharged, I went home to California for a few weeks and decided to decorate the scar some. I went to this little place down by the beach in Santa Cruz. Spent the whole day surfing then drank about a fifth of tequila and had Alexis’s name shoved under my skin just like she was.” He laughs, but it’s weak, and everyone can tell it wasn’t a good time he had.
I can’t help but touch him. I rub my hand up and down his back. “I think it’s the most beautiful tattoo I’ve ever seen.”
“Thanks, babe,” he whispers.
“Oh!” Beth yelps suddenly. “The flowers! They’re still in the back of the truck. We need to get them so Juan can get them replanted before they start wilting.”
“Sure thing,” Gabe stands up and looks at Juan like he should go along to help.
Juan clears his throat. “Uh, sorry, ese. My leash doesn’t extend to the street,” he says as he holds up his leg and points to the ankle bracelet there.
“Oh!” I reply way too brightly. “I’ll help. You two stay here. We’ll be right back.”
I grab Gabe’s hand and nearly sprint toward the front of the house. Once we’re out of sight, I stop and lay my head on Gabe’s shoulder.
“Oh my God, could that get any more uncomfortable? Holy hell. What do you talk about with a guy who’s been in prison for most of his adult life?”
Gabe takes my hand and starts slowly walking again. “Yeah, it’s pretty hard. I’m starting to feel sorry for the guy though.”
“What do you think about him and Beth together?” I ask.
He takes a minute to open the tailgate of the truck and hands me a flat of flowers. “I think they’ve got a really hard road ahead of them. But I’ll tell you, if anyone can make it work, your sister can.”
I nod my head in agreement. If anyone can.
When we get back to the patio, Juan and Beth are sitting facing each other on the picnic bench. He’s holding her hands and saying something to her. She’s shaking her head and looks upset. I feel Gabe stiffen beside me. He sets the flats of plants he’s carrying on the table and leans down to Beth.
“You okay?” He gives Juan a hard look.
She takes a deep breath and schools her expression. “I’m fine, Gabe. I told you not to worry. I know what I’m doing.”
I see Juan shake his head as he lets go of her hands. “Alexis? Can you help me put these over in the planter where they’ll go?” he asks as he picks up the flats Gabe just set down.
Gabe looks at me questioningly, but I mouth, “It’s okay,” at him and he shrugs. I take another of the flats and follow Juan down the width of the house to a small raised planter at the corner.
He sets his flats down then takes mine from me and sets it down as well.
“I need to apologize to you.”
“What for?” I ask.
“Well, for starters, that day in the mall in Floresville when you were still in high school.” He looks at me sharply, not giving me the option of pretending I don’t remember.
I can feel my face heat. “It’s fine. All forgotten.”
“It wasn’t okay, Lex,” he responds, using my childhood nickname. “Treating you like you were a puta off the street wasn’t okay. I was a cabron, but I did it for a reason.”
I look at him quizzically.
“One of the guys I was with, he noticed you, and he was saying shit about you. I wanted to make sure he didn’t try to talk to you or touch you, so I claimed you. It’s a thing… If you claim a girl, whether it’s for a night or longer, the other guys, they uh, they can’t touch her until you’re done with her. It’s a way to keep the brothers from fighting with each other over women. So I said I saw you first, and I claimed you. Then I had to talk to you like that to back it up.”
I stare at him in shock for a moment. “You were protecting me?”
He runs a hand over his face. “Yeah, I’m a real prince, aren’t I?” he says bitterly.
“Juan.” The sadness in my voice disperses into the air around us.
“I’ve always felt bad about that, so I wanted to explain it to you and promise I’ll never disrespect you again. I mean, if we ever run into each other or anything.”
I kneel and start taking the plants out of the flats, setting them on the ground in the planter. The dirt smell is rich and moist, and I imagine Juan out here by himself, feeling the soil and focusing on the act of preserving life – watering, pruning, tending. I have the same question Beth must when she looks at him here – how can someone who tends life like that also destroy it? How can this guy who wants to plant flowers have gunned down an innocent child?
“We’re going to be seeing plenty of each other, Juan. And you didn’t need to apologize.” I look up at him where he stands. He’s staring down at me like I’m insane. “But I appreciate that you were looking out for me. You’re a good guy.”
He kneels next to me and joins me taking the plants out and setting them in rows on the ground of the planter. Then, very quietly, “I’m not. I’m not good, and I’m for sure not good for your hermana. You have to help me convince her of that. She keeps coming here and seeing me, and…” He shakes his head. “She needs to stop.”
I stare at him.
“Please, Alexis.” It’s so soft I can hardly hear him. His head is down and his eyes are on the ground beneath him. “Ella es una estrella hermosa. Yo soy veninosa. No dejes que mi veneno entre en si vida.” She’s a beautiful star. I’m poison. You can’t let me poison her life.
“Juan. I can’t make those choices for her. People tried to make those decisions for Gabe and me, and it almost broke us. I’m still not sure we’ll be able to fix it. If Beth wants you and you want her, then you need to let it run its course. You never know what might happen. Maybe you two were meant to be.”
He shakes his head, and the look on his face is so sad it’s heartbreaking to view.
“Hey, babe!” I hear Gabe call as he walks toward us. “You about done with your little powwow over here?”
I stand up and plaster a smile on my face. “Yep. I think Juan can handle it from here.” I look at him intently. “Is Beth ready to go?”
“Yeah.” Gabe doesn’t elaborate.
Juan stands and reaches his hand out to Gabe. “Nice to meet you, bro.”
“Same,” Gabe replies. I can see sympathy in his eyes, and I hope Juan doesn’t notice. I get the feeling Juan isn’t much for pity.
They shake and we walk back to Beth at the picnic table. Juan hangs back a bit, but Beth tells me, “I’ll be there in a minute.”
I nod, and Gabe and I walk out to the truck. A couple of minutes later, Beth joins us. She sits and stares out the window of the truck without saying a word the whole way home.
When we arrive, she gets out, still silent.
“Beth,” I call, climbing out of the truck as she heads up the sidewalk to her front door.
She turns, and the look on her face is one I’ve never seen on my sister before. It’s sorrow and devastation and tenderness all at once. “It’s okay, Lex. I know what I’m doing. Thanks for being so decent to him. I appreciate it.”
And with that, she walks inside her house and leaves me standing on the sidewalk with no idea of how to help her.
Gabe
Lo mejor es ser franco.
Honesty is the best policy.
ANOTHER month of work and dinners with Alexis passes. She’s nearly done with the semester, and according to what I’ve gleaned, she’s going to be on her own financially after that. I’ve been socking away all the extra money from my overtime work, and deep inside, even though we’re not truly
together, I’ve got the idea that I’ll still be able to use that to help her with school in the fall.
The weather’s warmed up and the humidity’s climbed right along with it. It’s late April when Mike comes to me and says I need to pay up with my promise of surf lessons. We agree to go on Saturday, and he picks me up before seven a.m. so we can get the most time possible in at the beach. When I walk out to hop in his SUV, I notice the truck is gone. I wonder where in the world Alexis has gone this early on a Saturday. Then I wonder if she ever made it home the night before. I have no idea what she might have been doing, but the mere idea of her out all night ensures that I’m in a crappy mood for much of the drive down. Luckily Mike’s half asleep anyway so he leaves me alone.
When we get to Corpus, I’ve arranged for rental gear at a place near the beach, so we load that stuff up, boards hanging out the back of the SUV, and then head to the water. As we pull into the parking lot, I see a truck identical to mine sitting there. I look at it, my jaw agape, and see Alexis climb out, a wetsuit on, cup of coffee in her hand.
I’m out of the car before Mike can even pop it into park. “What are you doing here?” I ask, striding to her, my eyes flashing down the length of her covered only in a skintight wetsuit. It’s sending my imagination to all sorts of places it shouldn’t go.
“I brought you a cup of coffee,” she answers blithely, as if she drives three hours to bring me coffee every day.
I take the steaming cup from her hand and repeat, “Babe? What are you doing here?”
She smiles wickedly. “Mike and I arranged it. I know you always wanted to teach me to surf, so we’ve been planning this weekend for a while. I mean, you used to want to teach me to surf. I sure hope you still do.”
“Alexis, I’ve wanted to teach you to surf since Afghanistan, and that hasn’t changed. It’s uh, well, it’s sort of a fantasy of mine.”
She smiles and my heart feels like it’s grown too big for my chest. I catch my breath for a moment and then turn to look for Mike. The SUV is gone, but the surf equipment is all in the back of my truck.
“What the hell? Mike left?”
“Well, like I said, he and I sort of had an arrangement. He didn’t want to interrupt our lesson, and he said he’ll get you out another weekend. He also said you owe him for the gas down here.” She laughs.
I roll my eyes. “Of course he did. So, you’ve got the right gear on. Are you ready to rip it up?”
She cringes a little. “I hope I don’t totally embarrass you.”
I sling an arm around her neck as we walk over to the truck. “No worries, babe. You’re with me. You’ll be ready for the pro circuit by noon.”
Four hours later, I’m convinced Alexis may be the worst surfer in the history of surfing. She’s hopeless. She can’t stay up on a board for more than about five seconds. When the water’s smooth, when it’s rough, when it’s in between – it doesn’t matter. The girl can’t stand on a surfboard.
She’s just fallen off for the one thousand and tenth time, and she’s spitting water out of her mouth and pulling her hair out of her face when I finally call it.
I paddle closer to her and roll off of my board. “Sweetheart? Hop up on your board and I’ll tow you in.”
“I’m okay,” she tells me with determination. “I can get it, I know I can. I think I was on longer that time, and I have to remember to hold my core tight the way you taught me. I bet I get it this next time.”
I’ve had it with this shit, and I’m worried she’s going to get so exhausted that it won’t be safe for her out here. We stopped for a few minutes to eat fish tacos, but other than that, it’s been nonstop in the cold April water.
I take her freezing, wet face in my hands and look her in the eye. “Alexis? You suck. You’re without a doubt the worst surfer I’ve ever seen, and it’s not getting any better. But it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to do this. It’s not some deal breaker for me you know. I won’t feel any differently about you if you can surf or if you can’t.”
Tears form in her eyes. “You say that now. But does she surf? She probably does, and when you have the choice to spend time with someone who can do your favorite hobby with you or with a total waterlogged klutz like me, who are you going to pick?”
I laugh, and she tries to pull away from me, sniffing and coughing as she inhales more saltwater from the small waves that pass around us. “God, Alexis,” I run a thumb along her lips and wrap my other arm around her waist to help keep her afloat. “I’ve got something to tell you.” She looks at me, scowling, and as her board bobs closer and bumps her in the shoulder, she whacks it in frustration. She’s so fucking cute. I hope this confession doesn’t piss her off so badly that she stops speaking to me yet again. “See, here’s the deal. There is no other her.” I watch her expectantly. She looks perplexed.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, there hasn’t been any other girl since the night I brought her to your restaurant. We stopped seeing each other the next morning. I haven’t even talked to her since then.”
Another wave splashes her in the face but she doesn’t seem to notice. I can see the wheels in her head turning, and I’m thinking it’s not going to be good for me.
“You stopped seeing her… But that was weeks and weeks ago. That means all this time… Oh. My. God.”
Shit.
“The dinners. The housecleaning. The emails and notes and today. Oh my God, today! I just spent four fucking hours in the freezing cold water trying to stand up on a stupid piece of fiberglass because I was so afraid that huerita could surf and I couldn’t stand to be outdone by her. I…I…”
The saying “There are no words” comes to mind as I watch her sputter and curse. She starts to try to swim to shore, but I stop her. Then she thrashes around, trying to land a punch as I hold her arms in the water.
“Alexis,” I warn.
She glares at me and tries to wiggle free again.
“You have to stop. I can explain.”
She kicks at my shins with her little bare feet under the water, and I can see she’s going to wear herself out fast this way. Finally, I just give up.
And kiss her.
Her lips are cold and she’s got her mouth clamped shut for the first few seconds, but then I hear her moan and feel her lips soften before they open to me. I stroke inside her mouth and taste saltwater and feel her silky tongue on mine. My gut tightens and I move the arm at her waist lower until I’m cupping her ass, holding her as tightly against me as I can. I’m a damn good swimmer, but even I can’t keep up a make-out session in cold water with increasing swells bumping us around.
She moans again and I pull away gently. “Let me take you back to shore,” I whisper. “So we can do this the right way.” She nods, and I help her up onto her board before tying mine to hers and swimming us back to the beach.
When we get to the shore, I take the boards out of the water, and without saying anything, I carry them to the truck. Alexis follows, shivering. At the truck, I get the boards stowed then walk over to where she’s leaning against the passenger door. I take one of the towels Mike left for me out of the truck bed and gently dry her hair while she stands and watches me with big eyes. Next I slowly pull down the zipper on her wetsuit, gazing into her eyes the entire time. Her skin is covered in goose bumps, and all I can think about is running my tongue over every inch of it to warm her up.
The bikini she’s wearing underneath the wetsuit is turquoise, and it glows against her golden skin. I gently pull the suit off of her shoulders, down her arms, and then farther until her whole swimsuit is exposed. I have to catch my breath when I take in her perfect curves in that tiny suit.
I open the door to the truck. “Sit down with your legs out here,” I say quietly. She does what I say, and I peel the wetsuit down her legs until the whole thing is off. I toss it in the back of the truck and then grab the towel again and start drying her off. From head to toe. I take my time. I make every moment of it count,
thinking how much I’d like it to be my mouth in the place of that towel.
When she’s finally all dried and has stopped shivering, I ditch the towel and put my hands on either side of her thighs as she sits on the edge of the truck seat with her legs hanging out the door. I lean in and touch my forehead to hers.
“I didn’t mean to lie to you, sweetheart. I tried to come clean to you a few times, but you kept telling me to shut up and let you show me that you loved me. I’m sorry. I should have tried harder. It wasn’t to punish you or make you feel stupid, I swear.”
She sighs and swallows, her head still touching mine. “Can you tell me about her? I mean, were you… Did you…love her…”
I interrupt her. “God, babe. How can you even ask that? How can you think I’ll ever love anyone but you?” I lean back and run my hand through my soaking wet hair. “She’s a great girl. Her name is Carla, and she’s Mike’s cousin. She was a friend, and then after you went to Floresville, it just sort of happened. I was hurting, I didn’t think you’d ever come back to me. I knew I didn’t want anything serious with her, but she was just there…and you weren’t.”
She sighs and looks down at her lap.
“Alexis.” My voice is hoarse. “I never slept with her. You need to know that. I couldn’t. I couldn’t live like that again. But she liked being with me and you didn’t. I don’t know what else to say. I’m sorry. Mike told me not to do it, and I should have listened to him. I hurt you and her, and I wish I could take it back.”
“So where does this leave us?” She looks at me with those big wounded eyes again.
I clear my throat. “I’m not sure. In love?”
She smiles at me a little and my heart double beats for a minute. “I do love you, Gabe. I’ve been trying so hard to show you how much. I have one more thing I need to do.”
I shake my head. “I don’t want you to do this anymore. This isn’t some test you have to pass. I should have put a stop to it a long time ago. The trust – it’ll come back. We just need to keep spending time together, and when life throws us some curves and we make it through, the trust will happen all on its own.”
Concealed - A Hiding From Love Novel #2 Page 20
