Jack Murray would do more than listen. The thought tapped insidiously on her consciousness, a temptation so great she almost groaned aloud.
He’d told her to call if she needed him. She remembered his patience, his solid presence, the way he had so effortlessly cowed Ray. He hadn’t had any obligation to stop that night, or come to see her later. He did seem to sympathize.
Beth pressed her forehead to the glass and closed her eyes. Ray would be so angry if Jack Murray were here when he brought the girls home. She might as well wave a red cape.
But it wasn’t her fear of angering Ray that kept her from snatching up the phone again and dialing. It was the fact that the sheriff had asked her on a date….
No. Her breath clouded the windowpane. She had to be honest with herself. What really bothered her was the expression in his dark eyes when he looked at her, and the way that made her feel. She was bruised inside by her marriage and divorce. She didn’t want to be aware of a man. She wasn’t ready.
Would never be ready for the Butte County sheriff, a man who had to be as capable of violence as Ray was.
Beth held out for another fifteen agonizing minutes. She called Ray’s apartment and listened to his curt message: “If you want me to call, leave your number.”
“Ray,” she said, “I expected Steph and Lauren home some time ago. Please phone me.”
When the clock chimed softly six times, Beth knew she couldn’t bear the silence anymore, the relentless tick of the second hand, the empty street. She reached for the phone. Only then did it occur to her that Jack Murray might not be at home waiting for her call.
Painful relief surged through her when he picked up after the third ring and said brusquely, “Murray here.”
“Sheriff, this is Beth Sommers. Your neighbor. Um, the one who…”
“Has troubles with her ex-husband. I know who you are, Beth. Is he there now?”
“No.” Her chest felt as if it were being crushed. “Ray had the girls this weekend. He was supposed to bring them home at one today. He’s…he’s five hours late. I called the Elk Springs police, but they can’t do anything until twenty-four hours has passed. I could tell they thought I was being hysterical. Maybe I am….” Her voice was rising and she had to swallow a sob.
“I’ll be right over.” She heard a click and more silence, but a different brand this time.
He was coming. He would find Ray and the girls. Her anger had long since been swamped by fear, but tears hadn’t threatened until this minute, when she no longer felt so helpless and alone.
The sheriff arrived in an unmarked dark blue sedan. Beth rushed to unlock the front door. At the sight of the tall, dark man striding up her walkway, she was shocked by her desire to throw herself into his arms and cry against his shoulder. She had always been so independent—too much so for Ray’s taste. Even when times were toughest, she’d never been so tempted to trust a man to take care of her.
He took the porch steps two at a time. “Any word?”
Beth shook her head, her lips pressed together. Hold me, her heart cried.
She stood back and said stiffly, “Thank you. For coming.”
“I told you to call me.” He stopped on the doorstep, his brown eyes searching her face. “Why did you wait so long?”
“I was sure he’d show up. It’s a game for him. No, it’s not,” she reversed herself. “He hurts, and somehow that’s warped him. He wasn’t like this. He loved the girls!”
Without a word, Jack stepped forward and enfolded her in his arms. Off balance, she had to wrap hers around his waist. It felt so natural to lean against him and lay her cheek against his broad chest. His heart drummed beneath her ear and for just an instant she felt…safe.
But she wasn’t. Steph and Lauren weren’t. She couldn’t assume some man would fix troubles made by another one.
Beth stiffened and drew away.
Briefly his arms tightened, then freed her. Without comment, Jack said, “Give me his address and phone number. We’ll start there.”
Beth led him into the kitchen. “I just left another message ten or fifteen minutes ago.”
“I’ll send a deputy to his place.”
“Thank you.” She swallowed and willed herself not to cry. “I don’t think he’s there, but…thank you.”
He reached for her but stopped himself. “You’re welcome.”
She listened as he made the call. Brewing coffee gave her something to do while they waited. When she put the cup in front of him, he looked up.
“Where else does he take them?”
Beth sagged into the chair. “Not much of anywhere. Just recently Steph was saying that he’s always promising something special and then reneging. They mostly hang around at his place. Play computer games and watch TV. They get bored.”
He watched her steadily. “Do they go fishing? For walks? To the softball field?”
A spark of hope flared to life. “Wait. A friend of his has a cabin on the Deschutes. I wonder…”
The phone rang. She pounced on it, her heart drumming. “Hello?”
“Sheriff Murray handy?”
Almost holding her breath, she passed the phone to him.
“Yeah?” He frowned. “Okay. Let me call you in a minute.” Setting down the phone, Jack shook his head. “No sign they’re there.”
“Oh, no.” She twisted her fingers together and tried desperately to think. “The friend’s name is Bill. Bill… Oh, what is it?” she exclaimed in frustration. “Why can’t I remember?”
Jack’s big hand covered hers. “Hey.” His voice was a soft rumble. “Calm down. It’ll come to you.”
“Yes.” She closed her eyes and made herself take a deep, slow breath. “Of course you’re right. Just give me a minute….”
The chair was already tumbling back even before she consciously realized she’d heard a car—a pickup—out in front. “He’s home.” She raced for the front door. “Oh, God, let it be him.”
Jack was right behind her when she opened the door. Ray’s pickup sat square in front of the house. Steph and Lauren were scrambling down, Lauren running toward the porch.
Beth stifled a sob and met her youngest halfway up the steps. The convulsive hug gave away her feelings; her voice didn’t. She prayed it didn’t.
“You guys are late! What have you been up to?”
Stephanie was grinning, her dad right beside her, his hand on her shoulder. “Dad took us to a movie this afternoon, and then to the arcade. It was so cool! Look what I won!” She held up a pink and purple stuffed unicorn with a drooping horn.
“I threw up,” Lauren confessed. “Dad bought all the candy we wanted, an’ I had these huge Junior Mints and then red licorice, but my stomach got upset.”
“No kidding.” Beth marveled at her outward calm. She couldn’t bring herself to look at Ray, at the smirk she knew she’d see on his face. Never in her life had she been so angry she wanted to hurt someone, but right this minute she hated him with all the ferocity of a feral mother protecting her young from a predator. She didn’t care that he was their father; he threatened them.
“Girls,” Jack said calmly, “please go in the house. I need to talk to your father.”
Ray spit out an obscenity. “You have a cop here?”
“Don’t you talk like that in front of them!”
Jack squeezed her shoulder. His warm grip steadied her. As the girls hurried into the house, she stared at the man she had once loved, and wished she never had to see him again.
“Mr. Sommers,” Jack said, “Beth says that your visitation extended only until one o’clock today. Are you aware that you’re breaking the law in violating court-ordered visitation?”
Ray had once been handsome. He’d acquired new lines in his face, new puffiness under his eyes, a sneer to his mouth. He spit out another obscenity. “A few goddamn hours, and she’s calling the goddamn cops? Steph and Lauren are my kids, too. We did something fun today. Yeah, sure. That’s a crime.” He gave an ugly
laugh.
“Yes, in fact it is.” Jack’s voice held no emotion whatsoever. “Mr. Sommers, I doubt Ms. Sommers would be distressed if occasionally you were a little late, especially if you called to let her know. In fact, however, you’ve demonstrated a pattern of not bringing your daughters home when you promised to. If you don’t want to lose visitation, you’d better stick to the letter of your agreement.”
Ray took a bullish step forward. “Who the hell are you to tell me what to do?”
They were going to fight, right here on her front walk. She should never have called Jack, Beth thought in horror. This was all her fault.
Muscles tightened in his jaw, but he continued to sound dispassionate. “I’ll be happy to show you my badge.”
“Yeah, and it doesn’t say Elk Springs P.D., does it?” Ray spread his hands and turned to look around the neighborhood with exaggerated surprise. “Gee, we’re inside the city limits, aren’t we? So, I’ll say it again—who the hell are you?” Eyes furious slits, he leaned forward so the two men’s faces weren’t more than inches apart. “You’re not the law. Not here.”
In the hand that still rested on Beth’s shoulder, she felt the tension that quivered through Jack, belying his outward relaxation.
“I’m giving you some friendly advice,” he said calmly. “The Elk Springs P.D. are aware of the situation here. As I’m aware that you have a court date approaching. I’m sure the judge would be interested in knowing that your anger toward Ms. Sommers extends to violating an earlier court order.”
“Damn,” Ray said incredulously. “You’re threatening me. You son of a…”
“Not threatening. Advising you.”
Ray growled and lunged forward. Jack gripped his shoulder. His voice was dangerously silky. “Assaulting a law enforcement officer won’t help your cause.”
Face purple, a vein in his temple throbbing, Ray stepped back. He turned his glittering gaze from Jack to Beth. “You shouldn’t have called him.”
She was horrified by the apology that wanted to tumble out. She wasn’t sorry! She refused to be the classic abused wife who believed everything that went wrong was her fault.
Gaze steady, chin high, Beth said, “If you don’t bring the girls home on time, I’ll keep calling the police. Every time. Think about that.”
“You want war? Then you’ve got it,” snarled her ex-husband, before he stalked to his truck, got in and drove away.
Beth’s breath rattled out and her knees sagged.
Jack took her arm. “The girls are okay. He won’t hurt them.”
“He already has,” she whispered. Pulling away, Beth said, “I need to talk to them.”
The sheriff followed her back into the house. She wanted to ask him why, but couldn’t be so appallingly rude. She had begged for his help, and he’d given it. She couldn’t expect him to conveniently disappear now that she was once again reluctant to face him.
“Mom?” Stephanie was waiting in the front hall, her expression anxious. “Where’s Dad?” She peered past the two adults. “Is something wrong?”
“No.” Beth forced a smile. “Not really. I was annoyed at your dad because he didn’t let me know he’d be bringing you home late today. That’s all. It’s not your fault.”
“But he said…” She stopped.
“Said what?” Beth prompted, painfully aware of Jack, silent, behind her.
Looking flustered, the eleven-year-old said, “I thought you knew. But…but it was okay, wasn’t it?”
Beth gave her a quick hug. “I’m glad he took you somewhere fun. I just want to know ahead of time, that’s all! Now, where’s Lauren?”
“I made her take her stuff upstairs. In case…”
In case her parents started screaming at each other again. In case flowerpots shattered against the front door.
Suddenly ashamed, Beth managed a twisted smile. “You’re a good big sister. Thank you. Now, why don’t you take your own bag up? Make Lauren unpack. Tell her Mom said to use the hamper.”
“Okay.” Steph grabbed her duffel bag and started up the stairs. “I’ve got to work on my Kenya project.”
“Oh, no! Is it due tomorrow?”
“I’m almost done.” Steph waved a reassuring hand as she disappeared from the landing.
Thank God for one organized kid. Left to her own devices, Lauren wouldn’t worry about her homework until tomorrow morning when she was trying to find her book pack. Beth wondered if Ray remembered that much about the two girls. Did he care about things like their schoolwork anymore? Why couldn’t he see that they were more than weapons he could launch at her?
Forcing a rueful smile, she turned to Jack Murray. “Well, I’m having a feeling of déjà vu.”
He leaned against the newel, to all appearances completely relaxed. “Ah, but this time’s different. I didn’t invite myself to this party.”
For the first time, Beth realized he wasn’t wearing his uniform. This was not a cop who lounged at the foot of the staircase, but rather a man. A formidably attractive man, she thought, understanding her unease.
Blue jeans, comfortably faded, molded to the long muscles in his thighs. Over an equally faded T-shirt that had once been blue, he wore a windbreaker. To hide a gun? Beth wondered. On his feet were grass-stained running shoes.
For some reason, Beth’s gaze snagged on those shoes. Had he actually been mowing his lawn when she phoned? Did the county sheriff do something so mundane as mow and edge and fertilize his own grass?
She blinked and looked back at his face to find that he was watching her quizzically. He’d said something: I didn’t invite myself to this party.
“No,” she said quietly. “I got you into this. Unnecessarily, it would appear. I’m really sorry. There’s a good reason the policeman I talked to wanted to wait twenty-four hours, isn’t there?”
His brows drew together, deepening that permanent crease. “Yeah, but that doesn’t mean you were wrong to call them. Or me. You had every reason to be anxious. Your ex is keeping the kids a little longer every time, isn’t he? Upping the ante. What’s it going to be next week? Not bring ’em home until Monday morning? And after that, what?”
She shuddered.
Jack’s expression changed and he muttered what was probably a swear word. “I’m scaring you for no reason. We’ll deal with what comes. The fact that you called me today may give him pause.”
“You didn’t scare me.” Beth hugged herself, quaking inside. “How could you? I’ve already imagined everything. Just this afternoon alone, I’ve pictured him taking them to Mexico, or having a car accident, or hiding out, or…or even…”
He straightened. “Don’t say it.”
She had to. Just once. Her worst nightmare, the one that seeped like toxic gas into her dreams and waking fears alike, needed to be spoken aloud once, at least.
“The cases you read about in the newspaper.” She was surprised she sounded so…normal. As if she were arguing an abstract point. “Nobody ever expects a man to kill his wife and children and himself. They’re always regular people. Neighbors. You know how the pictures of the children always look like they must be their school photos? The kids are so well scrubbed, with these big grins, and you think—how could he? But you see, I’m already thinking that. And I wonder if those other women weren’t, too. If…there weren’t some kind of warning. If he didn’t…up the ante. That’s how you put it, right? Because Ray either has to give up, or do something dreadful. And I think—” she no longer sounded so steady “—I think his pride won’t let him give up, no matter what.”
“The vast majority of custody disputes don’t escalate into tragedy.”
“But you see, Ray and I don’t have a custody dispute. We agreed right away that Steph and Lauren would live with me, and we had no problem over visitation. This…this has to do with me, not them. That’s what scares me.”
He swore and pulled her into his arms again. She went with a ragged sigh, grateful for his warmth and strength and comfort
.
“Not all men are like him,” he said roughly, mouth against her hair.
She felt so very safe, though she knew it was an illusion. He couldn’t stay twenty-four hours a day and guard her or her children. He couldn’t trail at Ray’s elbow the next time he took Lauren and Steph. She still didn’t know whether his presence today had made things better or worse. She knew only, gratefully, that it felt so good for once to lean on someone else. To know that he was capable of coming to her defense, that he would if he could, that she wasn’t totally alone.
“I’m…not feeling very trusting right now,” she said, cheek against his chest.
His arms tightened, his voice a rasp in her ear. “I won’t ask you again right now. That’s not why I came. Just…think about it. Okay? I’m not like him. Nor are most men. Don’t let him scare you off.”
Now she did draw back. He didn’t try to hold her.
“Why me?” Beth asked, studying him in perplexity. “I’m not beautiful. My life is a mess. I don’t understand what you see in me.”
“I could argue about whether you’re beautiful.”
“I have a mirror. I’m…pretty. Maybe. You…” She gestured. “If Playgirl chose a Bachelor of the Month from Butte County, you’d be their choice.”
He gave a grunt that wasn’t amusement. “I’m ugly as sin.”
“You’re sexy, and you can’t tell me you don’t know it. You must have women….”
“Falling all over themselves? No.” He shrugged. “I can find dates.”
“Then…why me?” she asked again stubbornly, knowing the answer mattered.
The shift of emotions across his face showed that he didn’t want to answer, but at last he said, “You are beautiful, to me. But you’re right. That’s not what interests me.”
“Then what does?”
“The way your chin comes up when you’re afraid. It…reminds me of someone who was important to me. Your refusal to be petty. Most women would try to protect their kids from their dad. But they wouldn’t protect their relationship with him. You put them ahead of your anger. That’s rare, Beth.” His eyes were heavy-lidded, his voice velvety. “Rarer than you know.”
Jack Murray, Sheriff Page 6
