“You’re awake,” she said, yawning. “I’m so glad to hear that.”
“And you look tired yourself,” I replied, refusing to fall asleep.
“I just got back from the doctor. She’s still not sure what’s wrong with you, so you’re going to spend the next few days here while we figure this out.”
I nodded, not exactly the news I pined for. Still, if I was out of Keith’s reach then nothing else mattered. I was in Seattle, while he was in Colorado. He couldn’t get me at all.
“What about my finals?” I asked.
Mom gave me a rather haggard-looking smile.
“You’ll be able to take them after you recover. Tony’s talked to your professors.”
“Tell him thanks for me next time you see him.”
“Of course. I just wish you hadn’t studied so hard, Austin. Tony thinks you passed out from exhaustion because you studied too hard.”
Even though she had used my real name, it sounded oddly alien to me. I frowned at this, knowing full well the cause of it.
Keith.
“I really should get some sleep.” Mom slipped into the chair across from my bed, using the armrests to keep from falling as she fell into her seat. “I don’t think I’ve slept more than thirty minutes since Tony called me.”
“How long ago was that?”
“Two days now.”
Yikes. Looks like I’ve been sleeping a lot more than I thought I have.
“And they still don’t know what’s wrong with me?”
A slight pout perched upon her lips. “I’m really sorry, honey. They said they’d let me know the instant they knew anything.”
A thought crossed my mind. Maybe Mom knew something about Colorado. I looked at her as her head tilted slightly, like she was about to nod off.
“Hey, Mom. Do we have any relatives in Colorado?”
At that, she snapped to full attention.
“Oh, wow, Austin. I can’t believe you asked me that,” she said, sounding taken back.
I frowned. “I didn’t mean to upset you, Mom.”
“You didn’t,” she said, throwing up a hand as if to quell me. “It’s just…well…why are you suddenly asking about Colorado?”
The way her voice trailed off she said that made me wonder just how much she knew about that state. Was she trying to hide something from me?
“I just had the strangest dream the other night, one where I lived in a town called Monument, Colorado. It felt so real. Someone else claimed to be my mom. I think her name was Valerie Jonson or something.”
Mom’s hand covered her mouth so quickly I almost missed the movement altogether.
“I can’t believe you’ve heard of her. How is that even possible?”
I shrugged. “Like I said, it came to me in a dream.”
Mom looked at me blankly. “Oh, God. She was my dearest, sweetest friend. She and I practically grew up together. In fact, when we turned eighteen, she insisted on making me the guardian to her children, just in case something ever happened to her. And then she got pregnant, and gave birth, and then the disease got her. I…oh my God! How could I be so stupid? I need to talk to your doctors. I think I know what’s wrong with you.”
She charged out of the room with renewed vigor, leaving me hanging. Trusting she knew what she was doing, I rested my head against the pillow again and tried not to drift off. I didn’t want to give Keith a shot at messing with me in my sleep. Also, the possibility of waking up in Denver all over again snapped at my nerves.
Half an hour passed. Mom returned with a female physician with greying red hair and bifocals. Before either of them entered the room, Mom pulled the lady aside and whispered something to her that I couldn’t make out. A second later, Mom returned to my side, the doctor hanging out in the shadows by the doorway, almost invisible.
“Okay,” Mom said, drawing in a breath. “Austin, there’s something you need to know. Something that you may not want to believe. I guess I shouldn’t have waited until you became gravely ill to bring it up, but the truth of the matter is…you aren’t my son.”
At this, my eyes grew large. What exactly did this mean, that she wasn’t my real mom? I couldn’t believe it.
“I’m so sorry,” she told me. “I should have mentioned this to you a lot sooner.”
Exhaustion oozed all over my outrage, allowing only for a slight grunt to extend beyond the reaches of my nostrils. It took me a minute or two to find any strength to speak.
“So, go on then. Tell me about Valerie, or should I say my actual mom?”
She looked at me through shiny eyes, a sniffle implying tears.
“Valerie was my best friend. We went on double dates all throughout school together. We went to college together. We even got married together, although she came close to having you out of wedlock right after graduation.
“Then January 1995 happened. She had just given birth to you in Denver and I had come to stay with the both of you over the following weekend. Her husband, Luke, had to go out of town to Tallahassee for his accounting firm, right after your birth. I figured it was as good a time as any to meet you.”
“So, my actual name is Austin Jonson?” I asked, fearing her answer.
“Your real name is Tyler.”
“What the hell? Then how come you didn’t keep it at that?” I asked, the irritation in my voice rising far beyond what was acceptable levels.
“It’s like what I told Valerie back then,” she said, hanging her head so that we didn’t lock gazes any longer. “Because you always looked more like an Austin to me than a Tyler. And then when she passed away, I came to find that the Jonsons never made Tyler your legal name.”
“Wait a second. How come my dad never came back into the picture?” I asked.
Mom sighed, fell back further in her seat, and glanced up at the ceiling.
“He never came back from Tallahassee. There was no plane crash. He made it there just fine, but the airline reported that he never checked in on the date of his return flight. I think Valerie had already told him she was sick, and he couldn’t handle the truth at all. My lawyer managed to track him down, and he signed away all rights he had to you as his son. You were mine to care for as I saw fit. I figured that if I had kept the Tyler moniker, it might have caused major problems down the road. I wanted to give you a fresh start to live a wonderful life free of pain.”
“And just look at how well that turned out,” I said, my stare wandering towards the window.
“I did what I thought was best.”
“By lying to me this whole time, huh?” I growled again, finding strength from becoming angry. “So, what did my mom die from, or are you trying to protect me from that, too?”
Mom blanched at me. “I only did what I thought…”
“The truth!”
“I’m sorry,” the doctor at the door said, reminding me that she had been there this whole time. “I do want to give you both your privacy, but seeing as how I was asked to come all the way down here…”
“Sure. Maybe you can tell me what she won’t.”
Mom buried her face in her hands and said nothing.
“Very well. My name is Dr. Wilheier. From what Mrs. Teph has told me, your mother suffered from an aggressive form of leukemia,” the doctor said. “I don’t have the full story aside from what I just told you, but I suspect Mrs. Jonson may not have found out about her cancer until it was far too late.”
“So, what does this mean for me?”
“I’ve taken some blood samples. And from what I’ve learned of your family history, we may have cause for concern. There’s a good chance you may have leukemia.”
I was still so angry with my mom for her deception that I nearly missed the doctor’s news altogether. A second later, the realization finally struck me.
“Wait. What?”
“I’ll know more when the official results come back, but it looks like this may be the direction we’re heading.” Dr. Wilheier adopted a gentle glim
mer in her eyes, a faint grimace on her lips.
“I can’t believe this,” I muttered, twisting away from her.
“I know this is hard for you to accept, but I need you to trust me, Austin. You could have leukemia. Unless we address it right away, your chances of survival are not that great.”
“Whatever,” I said, drawing the sheets over my shoulders.
Mom and the doctor spoke softly with one another. After a moment, the woman who’d lied to me all these years peeled the sheets off me and made me face her.
“You can beat this,” she said in a soothing tone. “I have faith in you.”
A shrug forced its way through my shoulders.
“That’s assuming I have anything wrong with me at all. Kind of weird for you to tell me I’m both adopted and at risk for cancer at the same time, don’t you think?”
“I admit I dropped the ball on telling you about Valerie. That’s something I’ll never be able to forgive myself for,” Mom said.
“Really?” I gnashed my teeth. “Does it burn in the back of your mind how much I resemble your dead best friend? My God, you robbed her grave to fill your cradle with me, her actual son. What kind of a person does that to their best friend?”
The look of shame on her face didn’t waver. She tore away from me and crossed over to the window, staring at the world outside, her arms resting on the windowsill.
Meanwhile, the doctor presented a clipboard to me filled with sheets of paper. I rolled my eyes but accepted the clipboard when she refused to walk away. I looked at the first few sheets on the stack, but found nothing of interest, or anything I’d understand.
“The truth is there on paper, if you’re inclined to look.”
“Okay,” I said, with no conviction in my voice. Whether I believed the doctor remained to be seen. After all, how was I to know that Anne Teph hadn’t simply paid an actress to put on a white jacket and pretend to be a doctor? The time I’d spent in Colorado had shattered my trust in what was real and what wasn’t.
“I need time to process everything.” I didn’t know who my words were meant for, nor did I care.
Finally, the physician stepped toward the door.
“Very well,” said Dr. Wilheier. “I can come back later after you’ve gotten some rest.”
“Sure thing,” I said.
The doctor left the room, her shoes loud on the tiled floor. A few moments later, she was gone.
My gaze drifted away from the hallway entrance to the woman by the window.
“You gonna say anything?” I asked, her silence driving me insane.
“Do you really know, Austin, just how horrible a mom I’ve been to you?”
I heard her words but didn’t get the chance to reply. A sharp pain in the back of my head struck, followed by another glimmer of white light. Throwing myself backward on the bed, I tried in vain to prevent what I knew was coming. I could feel Keith’s essence growing stronger, could almost feel his hot breath chafing the back of my neck. My eyes shut in response to the agony. How could I possibly keep him away from me?
CHAPTER 10
COLRADO, REDUX
Heading Back to Colorado…
Light flared, then darkness. When I opened my eyes, I was no longer laying in my hospital bed, but rather in the bed in that room with that window boarded up. I went to get out of bed, but found my wrists and ankles burning from some sort of restraint holding them back.
“What’s going on?” I muttered.
Something moist slathered against the side of my neck, sending a chill creeping down my body. I twisted my head to the left, the direction from where the moisture had come. I grew enough awareness to realize that someone lay in the bed right next to me. Strands of blue hair shone under the light seeping in from the hall outside.
“Regina,” I said, keeping from spitting out her name.
“The one and only, big boy,” she said in an airy voice. “I’m so glad Keith agreed to let me keep an eye on you.”
“Of course.”
“He and Sissy are really worried about you. After how you threw that little hissy fit in the kitchen the other day, I’m surprised he didn’t kick you out.”
I rolled my head away from her, finding nothing else to distract me from her presence.
“He claims to love me,” I said.
“Oh, honey,” Regina whispered right into my ear, filling it with the hot air of her own breath. “Keith would have dumped your sorry ass a long time ago if he didn’t love you.”
I didn’t even blink at her words.
“But I don’t love the guy, Regina. I’ve never loved him. I’m not who he thinks I am. You seem like a smart woman. Surely you can see that.”
Regina smacked me clear across the face, my face ringing with pain. “I hate skanks. Don’t be a skank, Tyler.”
“Trust me. I’m not.”
She rolled about on the bed, throwing an arm across my chest as if to keep me pinned. Her other hand began stroking the cheek she’d hit a second earlier, then made its way down the side of my neck and arm. As I watched, her fingers grew ever closer to my abdomen.
“Don’t say another word,” she whispered breathlessly. “You might make him mad.”
“Not my problem.”
“It will be, and you know it,” Regina said, her lips inches away from mine. “We are all Keith’s puppets, to dance for him, to fulfill his every wish. It’s not a bad life, not by any means.”
She ran her tongue across my lips and I gagged, veering my head away from her.
“I do so despise that sound,” she sang to me, as though rehearsing for a musical act. “Why must you make such an awful sound?”
I choked on a laugh. “It’s better than you praising Keith when he isn’t even around.”
She pouted slightly. “No need to be rude.”
Her fingers withdrew and she slipped off the bed, standing up. She reached for a light switch on a lamp, brightening the room. She wore a dark dress with blood-red roses on the fabric, brown-green stems carrying a certain level of evil on their visage. Her barren arms carried dragon tattoos that looked like the ink had barely dried, her skin slightly blotchy around the body art.
“Do you like?” she said, catching me staring at her markings.
“They’re nice,” I told her.
“These were Keith’s idea. He knew of a tattoo artist who does dragons and recommended her to me.”
“I’ll bet.” I closed my eyes again, seeking out sleep. Until the white flash of light came to whisk me back to Washington, I had no desire to engage Keith or his puppets.
“Why are your eyes closed? You’re not sick, are you? I told Keith I didn’t want to play nurse today,” she said.
“I’m sure you did.” A low rumble protruded from my throat, but I decided to let it go. “Do you know when he’ll be back?”
“He didn’t say. He, Sissy, and Valerie had to go move some furniture or something.”
“And he left you alone with me?” I asked. “Doesn’t he think I might try to escape?”
“Oh, he took care of that. He bound your feet together. If you tried to get out of bed, you’d trip and fall. Then I’d have to come in here and bang your head against the bedpost a few times until blood ran out your nose and mouth. Lucky thing that won’t happen, huh?”
“Right,” was all I dared to utter. Considering the insanity of Keith and his cohorts, the odds of me surviving this Coloradan life shrank closer towards nothing.
“Maybe I should tell Keith you tried to escape,” she said, reaching for a jacket hanging from the door. She slipped it on and zipped it up, the top half of her dress disappearing behind the leather outerwear.
“And just what good would that do?” I asked.
She shrugged. “I’m just looking out for Keith.”
Regina closed the door behind her on her way out.
I lay back again, shut my eyes, thought of Seattle and Anne. She and Tony had done everything in their power to help me, but it ha
dn’t been enough. I was still stuck here in this godawful apartment, maybe never able to return home. Who knew when this whole shifting between two different cities thing would end? There seemed a certain permanence about the Colorado side of things now.
I opened my eyes, feeling a rise in the pressure filling my bladder. I tried to hold it in until Keith or Regina returned, but the pain against my organ wouldn’t relent. Moisture quickly dampened my garments and the bedsheets. The stench of my own urine soon tainted the air. I fought off the tears trying to fill my eyes but a few trickled out, riding the wave of embarrassment that overtook me.
Then, the door opened and Regina waltzed right back in, quickly slipping out of her jacket.
“Yeah, Keith just tore into me over text messaging because I left you alone,” she admitted, leaning her back against the door. She drew a deep sigh, but then cracked a smile a second later. “I guess he really means business with you this time around, Tyler.”
I didn’t dignify that with an answer.
“Keith needs you to use the bathroom before you…” she paused, smelling the air. “Oh my God, no! Tell me you didn’t pee on yourself.”
Knowing full well there wasn’t any point in lying, I smirked at her.
“Well, I can’t just spend my whole time in here without some sort of access to the toilet.”
She flew across the room to my side of the bed. A glint of malice filled her eyes and she punched her fist right into my eye, followed by a procession of more punches up and down my body, especially in the stomach region. I fought back with the only tool at my disposal, my teeth, and clamped down hard on her hand before she could move it. Another punch to my gut from her free hand forced me to let go, resulting in a deluge of bile saturating my bed and her hands. She shrieked with disgust and immediately stopped her assault. I tried to sit up and tug at the bands at my feet. But as I worked towards this she came at me again, this time striking a harsh blow to the side of my face.
“You’ll be lucky if Keith doesn’t slit your throat after this,” she said without remorse.
Life Flashes Page 7
