by K. A. Linde
“What?” Her mouth hung open in surprise at the words.
“It’s not your fault for what he did to you.”
“He didn’t do anything to me.”
Hayden continued speaking as if she hadn’t. “He’s a skilled manipulator. He made you see what he wanted you to see.”
He sighed heavily, as if the weight was off of his chest, and she just stood there, ramrod still. Hayden thought that Brady had manipulated her. But he hadn’t. She had never once thought about it like that. She knew what she was getting into from the start, right? He had set the terms in that diner, and she had agreed. That wasn’t manipulative. Right?
She felt all fucked up from what Hayden was saying. On some level she understood the manipulation, but her heart was saying it wasn’t. And that made her feel even guiltier.
“Lizzie, I love you,” Hayden said, pushing her hair off of her face. “I hate that this happened to you. I hate that you cheated on me with someone who was only using you . . . that you cheated on me at all.”
“I’m sorry,” Liz cried. “I didn’t mean to cheat on you. I just got so angry and stupid. I’m never going to be like that again.”
At her words, his lips crashed down on hers. She let him have her. What else could she do? She had lost her fight. And she deserved much worse than a hard kiss. She deserved his fury, and him leaving her.
But he wasn’t leaving her. He was kissing her passionately, feverishly. His fingers were tangled in her long hair, pulling the life out of her. One of his hands found the zipper on her dress, and when he pulled it down, the material dropped to the ground in front of him. He snapped the clasp on her bra and she was left standing before him in nothing but her black thong.
“You’re mine,” he growled against her lips. “All of you. Every inch. Make it like he never touched you.”
Liz whimpered as he bit down on her bottom lip and sucked it back through his teeth. His hands were everywhere at once. Caressing, fondling, claiming, owning her body. She hardly even moved as he raked his hands down her skin. He had every right to his anger.
“Turn around,” he ordered, directing her until she was facing her bed.
She didn’t dare move. She had never seen Hayden like this. A part of her was crazy turned on by it, and another part knew that she should stop it. She shouldn’t let him do it. But she couldn’t. She deserved it.
Liz heard the zipper of his pants and the swish as they dropped to his feet. Her heart rate skyrocketed in the seconds that she waited for him to act. She could feel her body tingling in anticipation and fear, wondering what was coming next, what he would do to her.
Hayden bent Liz forward roughly at the waist, and she braced herself on her mattress.
“Hayden,” she whispered. “Please . . .”
He didn’t respond, just knelt behind her before dragging her thong down her lean legs. She trembled at the feel of his hands along her thighs. He helped her step out of the clothing, and then roughly spread her legs apart before him.
Hayden bent forward over her, and Liz turned her head to look up at him. “Shhh,” he whispered, collecting her hair in one hand and tugging on it lightly.
Where was this coming from? Nearly her entire body was telling her to stand up . . . to stop him. But she hadn’t up until this point, and she wasn’t going to now.
Then his dick was spreading her lips and sliding easily up inside of her. Liz gasped with the pressure of him filling her, unable to move with the way he had her pinned down. He gripped her hip with one hand and began to work himself in and out of her. His momentum picked up quickly. Soon he was driving into her hard enough to push her entire body forward into the bed.
She didn’t want to enjoy this. She didn’t want to derive pleasure from it. She didn’t want to feel anything at all. But her traitorous body refused to listen. He was fucking her with vengeance. Not just owning her, but staking his claim . . . asserting his right. He fucked her as if he didn’t want anyone else to even think about coming close to this.
And even when she tried to hold it off, her body cracked open for him. She saw black as her orgasm tore through her body. She tightened all around him and screamed her lungs out, until he drove into her for the last time, and emptied himself buried deep within her.
Chapter 21
HE HAD IT COMING
Hayden left the next morning without much more than a good-bye. Liz stayed in bed until well past the time that he walked out. He hadn’t left her. That was as much as she could say about their relationship at this point. He hadn’t left her, but things were far from okay.
Her brain and her body felt numb. What had happened last night? She had thought the worst thing would be for Hayden to leave her. But here she was lying in bed, feeling worse than she had before. Telling Hayden hadn’t gotten rid of her guilt; in fact, maybe she felt worse. He had proven that her guilt was warranted. She had been in the wrong and then lied to him about it for months. It made her stomach turn.
She finally forced herself out of bed, fumbling for a light on the nightstand. She stood and that’s when she saw it. The necklace. It was resting on the nightstand as if Hayden had never hurled it across the room. It mocked her from its position as if he wanted to say Here, take your necklace back, whore.
She felt her chest sliced open again and it took everything in her to reach for the necklace. She checked it to make sure that it wasn’t damaged. Another wave of guilt hit her that she should even care if it was broken. She hastily put it back into her jewelry box and stumbled into the shower. She turned the handle to the hottest setting and stepped into the hot spray.
She was most surprised by the fact that she didn’t cry. She didn’t shed one tear. It was as if she hurt all over and still she couldn’t feel anything.
Victoria had ended up staying at Daniel’s house, so Liz had the place to herself. After her shower she shut all the lights back off, crawled into bed, and slept the afternoon away. She couldn’t think about her neglected responsibilities when her body and mind weren’t functioning. Maybe tomorrow . . .
Valentine’s Day was coming up that next weekend. Liz had a hard time focusing on what she was going to do when she next saw Hayden. Their conversations were almost exclusively one-sided over the next couple days. Liz gave her input when necessary, but she had too much else on her mind to really be into it.
All she was doing was making Hayden more frustrated with her. Liz didn’t know how to stop it. She felt as if she was self-destructing.
Friday rolled around soon enough. It was the day Hayden was supposed to come back to Chapel Hill for Valentine’s Day. Liz had finally forced herself to start acting like a human again. She ate a full breakfast, went to all of her classes, ninety percent of which she had skipped earlier in the week, and made it into the paper. She had never lied to get out of work a day in her life before this week. She had left Massey in charge of editorial work while Savannah took over the Washington division.
The smell and feel of the office kicked her back into high gear. This was where she belonged. This made her blood flow and reminded her what she was doing with her life.
Savannah stopped her before she reached her office. “Hey, are you feeling any better?”
Liz smiled at Savannah and nodded. “A bit.”
She wished Savannah didn’t remind her so much of her brother. Brady was the last person she wanted to think about today. He was part of the reason she was in this whole mess to begin with.
“Good. We were worried about you. Can’t have a functional paper without the editor, and Massey is no editor,” Savannah said with an easy laugh. They started toward Liz’s office.
“I’m sure she held down the fort.”
“That’s one word for it.”
Liz laughed softly. It felt good to laugh. “Well, I’m back. So, no worries.”
They reached her office, and Savannah nodded her farewell. Liz stepped inside and shut the door. She wanted peace and quiet and the feel of being in contr
ol of something. She booted up her computer and plopped down in her chair.
As the screen came to life in front of her, her phone started vibrating. Liz fished it out of her pocket and stared down at the screen. The New York Times.
“Hello?” Liz asked. Normally when Nancy called, it was from her personal line. Liz had programmed the main line of the New York Times into her phone along with several other numbers Nancy had given her at the start of last semester, but Nancy had never used them.
It made her jittery with excitement.
“Liz, it’s Nancy. How are you?” she said in her thick northern accent.
“I’m doing well, and yourself?”
“Really well up here. When do I see you again?”
Liz furrowed her brow and tried to recall when she was next scheduled to be in New York. She knew for sure the first weekend of her spring break, and that was only a couple weeks away. She told Nancy as much.
“Perfect. That’s perfect timing.”
“For what?”
“Liz, I’m really very pleased to have worked with you so far this year, and I’d like to extend a job offer to you working as a political journalist here at the New York Times starting post-graduation.”
“Oh my God,” Liz breathed softly.
She had been waiting to hear about her job applications. She had heard back two noes already, but they hadn’t been a surprise. And now she had a job offer on the table. Her head told her that she should take some time to think about it and weigh her options, but her gut told her just to take the damn deal.
It would get her out of Chapel Hill. She could start over, move to New York, get a crappy place for way too much money, and just live out her dream. It sounded too good to be true.
“Yes,” she said without another thought. “Yes, I want to take the job.”
No way was she getting a better offer than that, and even if she did, she couldn’t imagine having as good a boss as Nancy. She was ecstatic.
“Wonderful. I can’t wait for you to start. We’ll be in touch with further details.”
“Thank you so much,” Liz murmured before hanging up her phone.
She sat in her chair in shock. She had just accepted an offer to work as a reporter in New York City. Holy shit! Her hands were shaking. She didn’t even know what to do. It was as if everything was finally falling into place. She couldn’t believe it.
The first thing she did was press the button to dial Hayden’s number. It was automatic. She had to let him know. He would be excited for her. This was what they had always talked about.
It rang three times before going to voice mail.
“Hey, Hayden, I have some exciting news! Call me back!”
Liz hung up the phone and tossed it down on her cluttered desk. Job offer at the New York Times. She had to keep reminding herself it was real. When she had gotten the internship there, she had been freaking ecstatic, but that paled in comparison to what she was feeling right now. She didn’t even know what to do or who to tell first.
She opened her email and started sorting through them, hoping that Hayden would call her back soon. She had been so out of it lately that the emails were piling up quickly. She was finding it hard to focus with all the adrenaline pumping through her, but since Massey had taken over, Liz knew she had a lot to do. She would tell Victoria when she got home and they would celebrate with some Patrón, if Liz knew Victoria. Hayden would get there shortly after and then it would all be as it was supposed to be.
Liz stopped on an email that she had from the Charlotte Times. She had become a junkie of that paper’s ever since Hayden had started working there. She subscribed to his byline, which allowed her to read all of the articles that had his name on them. Not that many did, but she wanted to know when they were there.
The email opened up and Liz froze. Her stomach dropped out, and she was pretty sure that she saw stars. This couldn’t be happening. It couldn’t.
The headline read, “Congressman Brady Maxwell’s Alleged Affair with University of North Carolina Student.”
Liz’s vision dipped and she had to clutch on to the desk to hold herself steady. Oh no. No, no, no. This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t possibly be happening.
She needed to read the rest. She needed to see what he had written. Her hands shook as she scrolled down the page. She covered her mouth with her hand as she looked at a picture of Brady under the headline. She had been avoiding him at all costs, and seeing his picture now just made her whole body want to curl up into a ball and die. What had she done?
They had given up their entire relationship, everything, so that he could have his career. Now he was going to be faced with their relationship in the papers anyway! And he had just announced his run for reelection. This could fuck up everything.
She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t even focus enough to comprehend what she was seeing in front of her. All she saw was Brady and how horribly she had fucked everything up.
Her fingers curled around the desk, and she forced herself to read the article. It was all in there. Everything she had told Hayden and every twisted way he had interpreted her relationship with Brady. How she and Brady had met, their sexual relationship, the age difference, the pseudonym Sandy Carmichael, even the fact that Heather and Elliott were aware of the relationship. The only thing that wasn’t in the article was Liz’s actual name. She was the anonymous source to her own nightmare.
Liz reached the bottom of the article, and just when she thought she couldn’t hate what had happened any more, she read the byline: Hayden Lane and Calleigh Hollingsworth.
Banging on her office door pulled her out of her stupor. “Come in.”
Savannah stumbled through the door and immediately closed it behind her. She was breathing heavily and looked to be on the verge of tears. “Have you seen what your boyfriend has done?” she asked.
“Yeah. I just saw,” Liz managed to get out.
“Did you know? Did you know he was going to write this?” Savannah looked manic.
“No,” Liz said with enough ferocity that Savannah had to believe her. “No, I had no idea.”
Savannah sank to the ground and buried her head into her knees. “I can’t believe this is happening. Brady isn’t that kind of person. He would never just sleep with a random undergrad. He wouldn’t do that. I love my brother, but Clay is that kind of person. He would do it just for fun, but not Brady. He’s a good man, and Hayden is trying to ruin him.”
Liz didn’t know what to say. The story was true, but she couldn’t say that without explaining how she knew. And after telling Hayden what had happened, she never wanted to tell anyone else ever again.
“Do you know anyone named Sandy Carmichael? I mean, I know he said it’s a pseudonym, but maybe it’s not,” Savannah said hopefully.
Liz shook her head. “No. I don’t know anyone by that name.”
“Me either,” Savannah said with a sigh. “I just don’t understand what any of this has to do with Brady’s reelection, with what he’s done as a congressman. His private life should be private. I know Hayden’s your boyfriend, but I want to strangle him.”
“No need to apologize to me,” Liz said gruffly. “I want to strangle him too.”
Savannah turned her head to the side and narrowed her eyes. “Yeah? What’s been going on?”
“It’s been bad for a while,” she admitted. Ever since she had seen Brady again. He sauntered back into her life and she remembered in those fleeting hours what passion was. Her relationship with Hayden had never been the same. “It’s over.”
“Wow. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Liz said, shaking her head. “He had it coming.”
Chapter 22
MELODRAMA
Savannah left ten minutes later when she received a call from her father. Liz tried not to overhear, but the words lockdown and emergency were definitely thrown around. Before Savannah walked out of Liz’s office, Liz hugged her. She wished that she could tell Savannah
how sorry she was and how much she wished that she could take it all back, but it wasn’t possible. No one could know what had happened. She still had to protect Brady however she could.
Liz knew the best thing for her to do would be to lie low, keep her head down, and not draw any attention. Hayden’s article hadn’t mentioned her real name or the fact that she was a reporter. That made the search pretty broad, and Liz wanted to keep it that way.
She couldn’t imagine the cross fire Brady was under because of this article. He had just announced his intention to run for reelection, and the last race hadn’t exactly been a walk in the park. His opponents would surely use this to try to get him out of office. That was what he had feared last election.
Thinking about it made the numb feeling she had been harboring the past couple days shatter like broken glass. It was replaced immediately with a fury unlike anything she had ever felt. Hayden, her perfect fucking boyfriend, was the most selfish asshole she had ever met.
Without having to speak to him, Liz knew why he had done this. He had been hurt by what she had done, angry and jealous. But that did not excuse his taking her trust and smashing it into a million pieces. She knew Hayden wanted to advance his career, and he had taken the first opportunity to make it happen. He had used her story when she had trusted him. And he didn’t even have the decency to call her back.
Liz snatched her phone back off her desk. She had called Hayden only thirty minutes earlier to tell him about her job offer. She had been ecstatic, wanting to share her good news with him. She was calling for a very different reason this time.
She dialed his number and waited. As she expected, after three rings it went to voice mail. Either he was purposely avoiding her calls or he was just that swamped with calls about the article. Liz doubted that it was the latter.
The line beeped for her to leave a message.
Liz took a breath before speaking. “Hayden. This is Liz. Perhaps you’ve heard of me. I called you thirty minutes ago with some really super exciting news. I’m calling you back because I have some even more exciting news that I really need to talk to you about. Call me back at this number. I don’t think you’ve managed to lose it overnight. But in case you have, don’t worry . . . I couldn’t think less of you than I do in this moment.”
