by Lark, Sarah
Elaine was shocked. Not so much because John Sideblossom was clearly sleeping with, or had slept with, his Maori maids. But because it must have happened before his son’s eyes. Thomas must have witnessed at least two of Emere’s pregnancies. And had she not been his nanny? How could John have forced the woman to give the children to an orphanage?
Elaine turned pale. “Are there more?” she asked hoarsely.
Arama’s face took on a searching expression.
“Sheep?” he asked tentatively. “For the dog? A whole bunch. Please join us if you like and…”
Elaine did not answer but let her gaze rest seriously and expectantly on him.
“Mr. Sideblossom has taken five mulatto children from the mission school in Dunedin,” Arama said finally. “Two girls as maids and three boys as farmworkers. I’ve been here four years, and he trusts me. I’m in charge of the farm while he’s off herding the sheep with the others. And—”
“Does Thomas know?” Elaine asked without emphasis.
Arama shrugged. “I don’t know, and I don’t ask. You should do the same. Mr. Sideblossom is not very indulgent. Nor is his son. Would you like to help us with a few other sheep? We’re repairing the fences, and there’s still some herding to be done.”
Elaine nodded. She could think later about what she had just learned. And about what Zoé might know. And about the news Zoé had proudly shared with Elaine that morning: she was pregnant. Thomas would soon have a half brother or half sister—though apparently that was nothing new.
Elaine pushed aside her father-in-law’s unique method of increasing his staff and followed Arama and Pai to the other sheepcotes. There was not much work for a sheepdog of Callie’s caliber, since most of the sheep were in the highlands. Staying behind were only a few sickly sheep, a ewe that had been covered very late and hadn’t yet lambed, and a few dozen sheep that were to be sold. The latter were the most fun for Callie, because it was a larger herd, and the dog enjoyed the challenge. For the first time in a long time, Elaine, too, was something akin to happy when she made her way back to the house that evening.
“You smell like sheep,” Zoé complained when they ran into each other at the house’s entrance. “I cannot tolerate that in my condition.”
Elaine had already heard that remark twice at breakfast. First Zoé had not been able to tolerate the smell of coffee, then she had felt sick at the sight of scrambled eggs. If things continued in this manner, several difficult months lay ahead for Elaine and the female servants.
“I’ll wash up straightaway,” she informed Zoé. “And the baby should get used to the smell of sheep. Mr. Sideblossom is hardly going to raise his child to be a rose gardener.”
With that, Elaine rushed off to her own chambers. She was rather pleased with herself. She was slowly regaining her old quick-wittedness—though she had never been so cutting and mean in the past. Maybe I should be more patient with Zoé, Elaine thought, particularly if she’s drawn the same conclusions that Arama and I have. It had to rattle Zoé’s nerves to live in such close quarters with Emere. Zoé had no avenues of escape like Elaine did in the closed-off west wing. Zoé and John’s apartments included the manor’s common rooms and were adjacent to the kitchen. And Emere ruled over them all. Cold as ice, with her penetrating gaze. Zoé was probably in hell.
Elaine returned to the stables first thing the following morning. Arama and the few men who had stayed behind with him had more work for Callie. After they were done, around midday, Elaine decided to risk an afternoon ride. Arama offered to saddle the small black horse that she had been friendly with the day before.
“His name is Khan,” Arama said. “He’s just three years old, and has only been ridden for a few months. You can ride, can’t you?”
Elaine nodded and told him about Banshee. “My father will send her as soon as her foal can handle itself. I can hardly wait. I miss her a great deal.”
Arama looked skeptical, which astonished Elaine. Did he not trust her horsemanship? Or did the thought of a white mare in these dark stables bother him? Elaine did not plan to lock up her horse anyway. Banshee was used to pasturing.
She erased any concerns Arama might have had about her riding ability in short order. She climbed nimbly onto Khan’s back without help, and laughed when Arama told her regretfully that he could not offer her a lady’s saddle.
“Zoé Sideblossom does not ride,” he said.
Now why did he say that so portentously?
No matter. Elaine was not going to read anything into Arama’s words. Instead, she set off to investigate her new surroundings. Riding Khan proved to be a real pleasure. The stallion was spirited but easy to ride, and Elaine, unaccustomed to Arabians, enjoyed the feeling of lightness. When her grandmother’s cobs galloped, the earth beneath their hooves seemed to quake. Khan, however hardly seemed to touch the ground.
“I could get used to this,” Elaine remarked, patting the horse’s throat. “Let’s do it again tomorrow.”
On her first ride, she had limited herself to the area immediately around the farm, examining the pastures around the house and the shearing sheds. Lionel Station had two, both of which were of an imposing size. There was no cattle breeding, as on Kiward Station, because the terrain was too rocky. She knew that cattle only made a good return on expansive grassy flatlands like the ones in the Canterbury Plains, since they could not be driven up into the highlands in the summer like sheep.
The next morning Elaine set out early after packing a lunch for herself. She wanted to ride along the river in the direction of the mountains and explore the foothills of the McKenzie Highlands. It was her family history, in a manner of speaking. She giggled when she thought of her grandfather and the breakneck ride that had brought her mother to safety back then. Fleurette had come across James while fleeing John Sideblossom—and both of them had nearly fallen into the same trap.
Elaine enjoyed her excursion tremendously. The weather was grand: dry and sunny, with a light breeze, ideal for riding. Khan set off energetically but was more even-tempered than the day before and no longer took advantage of every opportunity to go at a gallop. Elaine could therefore concentrate on the landscape and take in the panorama of the high mountains on both sides of the Haast River. Callie ran happily beside her, only leaving her occasionally to lay fervent chase to a rabbit—which she really should not have done since sheepdogs were normally discouraged from hunting. But the rabbit problem in New Zealand had grown so dire in the last few years that even purists like Elaine’s grandmother Gwyneira didn’t reprimand their dogs for engaging in a bit of hunting. Brought to New Zealand on some ship, rabbits had multiplied explosively due to a lack of natural predators. In some parts of Otago, they were even making grass scarce for farm animals. Entire plains that would otherwise have served as pastureland for sheep had been eaten clean by the long-ears. The desperate settlers had finally introduced foxes, lynxes, and other rabbit hunters into the wild. But there were still nowhere near enough predators to significantly reduce the rabbit population.
The rabbits had nothing to fear from Callie, however. True, she set after them enthusiastically, but she never caught any. Gwyneira liked to say that border collies were more likely to herd the rabbits together than to eat them.
Around midday Elaine rested by a stream that flowed down a little waterfall into the Haast River. While Khan and Callie splashed about in the water, Elaine took a seat on a rock. She set her lunch on another, since the stones were arranged like a table with chairs around it. The Maori would like that. Elaine wondered if Rahera’s tribe often camped here, but she did not see any trace of them. Well, she would not be leaving any behind herself—the Maori treated the land with care, and Fleurette and Ruben had taught their children to do the same. Khan ate a bit of grass, of course, and his hooves left imprints in the tall grass, but they would be gone in a day. Elaine did not even light a fire.
After eating, she lay in the sun a little longer, enjoying the clear, bucolic day. Where th
e landscape was concerned, she liked her new home. If Thomas would only behave normally! What did he enjoy so much about torturing and humiliating her? Perhaps there was some kind of fear driving his behavior. She considered trying to speak to him again, to make her point of view clear. If he could only bring himself to confide in her! Here in the sunshine—far from the gloomy apartments she had come to view as a nightmare, and after three days of freedom without Thomas—her situation no longer felt as hopeless.
Filled with renewed optimism, she climbed back onto Khan. She knew that she should start riding back to Lionel Station, but she gave in to the temptation to explore one more bend of the river, just to see what lay behind it. She told herself that she had been going almost entirely uphill, so she would make considerably faster progress on the return downhill. The river now lay far below her in a canyon. It looked as though someone had split the landscape with a knife and then poured water in the gouge. Elaine took in the spectacular view with delight, laughing at Callie who was standing on the ledge and peering down curiously at the river. She wondered where the McKenzie Highlands began and where the famous pass was, through which her grandfather had herded the sheep and where he had kept himself hidden from every pursuer’s eyes for so long.
It was late afternoon by the time Elaine decided to turn back. As she did so, Khan suddenly raised his head and whinnied. As other horses answered, several dogs barked, and Callie greeted them in turn. Elaine peered in the direction of the whinnying and recognized John and Thomas and their crew. They had returned much sooner than Elaine had thought they would.
Despite her earlier sense of contentment, the usual shudder of fear and mistrust shot through her when she saw Thomas coming toward her. Her instinct was to flee. The men might not yet have seen her, and Khan was fast. Then she chided herself for the thought. These people were her family, and she had done nothing wrong. There was no reason to run away. It was time for her to stop acting like a terrified rabbit in Thomas’s presence. Elaine put on her friendliest smile and rode toward the men.
“Now this is a surprise!” she called out cheerfully. “I would never have expected to run into you here. I didn’t think you’d be back until tomorrow.”
Thomas looked at her coldly. “What are you doing here?” he asked slowly, drawing out each word, and not bothering to acknowledge her greeting.
Elaine forced herself to look him in the eye.
“Riding, what else? I thought I’d explore the area a bit, and since my horse isn’t here yet, I borrowed Khan. That was all right, wasn’t it?” The last question came out like a whisper. It was not easy to act self-assured when Thomas assumed that inscrutable mien. Elaine did not appear to be the only one who felt threatened by the situation. The Sideblossoms’ men, almost all young Maori, withdrew perceptibly.
“No, that was not all right!” spat Thomas. “That stallion has hardly been broken in, and that’s not even taking into account the fact that it’s no horse for a lady. Something could have happened to you. Besides, it’s not ladylike, you riding around here alone.”
“But Thomas,” Elaine said. Despite the tension, his argument was so ridiculous that she almost had to laugh. “There’s no one here to see. Since leaving Lionel Station, I’ve yet to run into anyone who could find my behavior unladylike!”
“I find it unladylike,” Thomas said coldly. “And that’s the only one who matters. I have nothing against the occasional ride—together with me on a gentle horse. But you won’t be leaving the farm alone anymore. Do we understand each other?”
“But I’ve always ridden out alone, Thomas. Even as a child. You can’t lock me up!”
“Oh, can’t I?” he repeated coldly. “I see that we’re playing the usual little game. Who knows whom or what you were looking for here. But come along now. We’ll discuss this further later.”
The men let Elaine into their midst as though she were an escaped prisoner who had to be led back under guard. Suddenly she no longer found the landscape so intoxicatingly beautiful or sublimely expansive. Instead, the mountains felt as though they were closing in on her like a prison. Thomas did not say so much as a word to her, and the three-hour return trip passed in a dreary silence.
Arama and Pita, who had been waiting for her in the stables, took Khan from her. On Arama’s face in particular, Elaine detected a look of deep concern.
“You should not have stayed out so long, Mrs. Sideblossom,” he said quietly. “I feared something like this, but I did not think the men would return until tomorrow morning. Do not worry, we won’t say a word about your helping us with the sheep.”
Elaine would gladly have brushed the stallion down herself as she had done the day before, but Thomas indicated that she was to return to the house straightaway.
“Go change your clothes so that you will at least come to dinner looking like a lady!”
Elaine trembled as she fled into her dressing room. Pai had kept a dress of hers ready and quickly helped her to tie her corset tighter.
“Mr. Sideblossom is… angry?” she asked tentatively.
Elaine nodded. “I can’t take it,” she whispered. “He wants to lock me up. I can’t—”
“Shhh.” Pai caressed Elaine’s cheek with her hand as she put Elaine’s hair up. “Don’t cry. That won’t make it better. I know that from the orphanage. Sometimes the children cried, but it never helped. You get used to things, Mrs. Sideblossom. You can get used to anything.”
Elaine thought she would scream if she heard that phrase one more time. She would never get used to this life. She would rather die.
Zoé was waiting for everyone with a sanctimonious smile.
“And you’re back as well, Elaine! How nice. Perhaps you’ll be offering me a little more company over the next few days. Spending all your time with the workers and the dogs can’t be any fun.”
Elaine ground her teeth. Thomas gave her an icy look.
“I used to ride out a bit before too,” Zoé continued cheerfully as the food was brought out to them. That evening, she supplied most of the dinner conversation herself. Thomas was silent, and John seemed to find it interesting to observe the young married couple. “Just think, Lainie, I had a horse when I came. But I eventually no longer cared to go riding. Our men hardly have any time to accompany a lady on a ride anyway. Then John sold the horse.”
What was that? A warning? Or was Zoé already looking forward to the fact that Thomas would surely sell Elaine’s beloved Banshee as soon as the horse arrived at Lionel Station? Elaine now understood why the mare had not been allowed to join them for the journey. It had not been about saving the foal from the long trip but about shackling Elaine to the house.
Emere served as silently as ever. But even she had her eyes on Elaine. That night she played the putorino flute. Elaine tried to shut the spirit voice out, but it sounded closer than ever, and not even the thickest curtains could block it out.
It was that ghastly night that Elaine tried the vinegar rinse for the first time. She groaned with pain as she washed herself. She could hardly walk to her bathroom as it was, after Thomas had driven the “little games” out of her more wildly and forcefully than ever. Emere’s eerie flute playing had only appeared to heighten his rage.
When he finally left her, Elaine would have most liked to crawl under her blankets until the pain eased, but then she remembered Inger’s directions for avoiding an unwanted pregnancy. For she would not have a child. Not ever.
9
William and Kura’s marriage had taken a very strange turn ever since Kura learned she was expecting. The young woman appeared to take offense at practically everything the residents of Kiward Station did. She spent most of her day alone, or with Heather Witherspoon, if necessary. She hardly played the piano anymore, and had not sung for weeks. Though Gwyneira was worried, James and Jack found it restful.
“Peace and quiet!” James said happily, sprawled in an armchair on the evening of his return from Queenstown. “And I used to like music so much t
oo! But now… oh, don’t make a face like that, Gwyn! Let her sulk. Maybe it’s because of the pregnancy. Women can behave very strangely when they’re expecting, they say.”
“Thank you very much,” Gwyneira returned. “Why didn’t you bring that to my attention earlier? When I was expecting Jack, you always said that pregnancy made me more beautiful! There was no talk of ‘strange’ behavior.”
“You remain the notable exception,” James said, laughing. “That’s why I fell in love with you at first sight. And Kura will calm down again too. She probably only just realized that marriage isn’t a game.”
“She’s so dreadfully unhappy,” Gwyneira sighed. “And she’s furious at all of us, me most of all. Though I did give her the choice.”
“Having our wishes fulfilled doesn’t always make us happy,” James said wisely. “But there’s nothing to be done. I almost feel sorry for William. He must bear the brunt of it. But it does not seem to bother him much.”
This equanimity mostly had to do with the fact that Kura’s bad temper and reclusive tendencies were limited to daylight hours. She seemed to forgive William everything at night and was at times an even more exciting lover than before. It was as though she were saving up all her energy to give herself and William the greatest possible satisfaction at night, and so one climax followed another. During the day, William saw to the work on the farm—which he felt quite a bit better about. Gwyneira mostly left him in peace these days. Even if something did not suit her, she generally took William’s side, sometimes even in confrontations with James McKenzie. James was by nature an easygoing person, and he had never thought of Kiward Station as his, so he accepted William’s occasional poor decisions without commentary. The young man would most likely be the master of the farm one day, so James might as well get accustomed to William bossing him around.
