by Jan Meredith
“Holy stud in a tux, Batman! Is that Thor giving compressions?” Connie worked her fingers over the screen, enlarging the photograph for a better look.
Beth clutched the stack of handouts to her chest. She hadn’t gone through the photos. Hadn’t wanted to see Gabe’s face on the screen. Hadn’t wanted to be reminded of how good they’d been together…and that she’d sent him away.
“Um, let me see.” She glanced at the photo. Her heartbeat quickened. The rest of her flushed with heat. “Oh, that’s, um…Dr. North. He was a, ah…groomsman.”
“Love the hair,” Connie murmured. “Hell, love everything.” She flipped to another shot and tilted her head, squinting at the screen. “Beth, he’s looking at your ass.”
“What? Let me see that.” Beth snatched the phone out of Connie’s hand.
The focal point of the shot was of the paramedics loading Albert into the ambulance, while in the background, she, Beth, was on her knees, and yes, her ass was in the air while she stuffed the defibrillator back into his medical bag. Sure enough, there was Gabe, standing right behind her…looking squarely at her ass.
Beth closed her eyes, dropped her head. Oh, God, had Drew noticed this? Had he already sent copies to the bride and groom? If not, could she be lucky enough to find his computer on, get into his file and delete the damn things? Heat stung her cheeks.
Connie looked at the photo again and then back at Beth. Her green eyes narrowed. “You got laid…by Dr. Thor!”
If her face got any hotter, her skin would steam. Beth spun around and headed out of the break room, Connie hard on her heels. She rushed down the hall behind her and into her office.
Connie closed the door, leaned back against it, and crossed her arms. “Spill it, sister, and I want details.”
Knowing her friend wouldn’t leave her office until she gave up something—something juicy and intimate—Beth dumped her papers on the desk and opened the bottom drawer. She pulled out a large flat object covered in Cracker Barrel’s signature gift-wrapping paper and handed it to Connie, who immediately tore into it. With a squeal, she held up the five-pound Hershey’s chocolate bar.
“Lick-o-licious!”
Beth started at the beginning, with the conversation she’d overheard in the bridal chambers. She told her about the kiss at the wedding and the one at the lounge.
“So…on the ride up in the elevator, did you two…?” Connie waggled her brows.
Beth rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “Sorry, no story there.”
Connie pouted for a second before flicking a hand in the air. “Doesn’t matter, as long as you finally get to the good stuff.” Her eyes narrowed into slits. “And you did get to the good stuff, right?”
Heat suffused Beth’s cheeks.
“Awesome! I haven’t seen you blush this much since I talked you into going to my sex toy party.” Connie laughed, then sobered and asked, “I only have one question…did he make you happy, hon?”
Beth closed her eyes, allowed the memories she’d been holding at bay to tumble out. “Many times.”
“Are you going to see him again?”
Beth…change your mind. Gabe’s parting words rang inside her head.
Oh, God, she wanted to. Wanted to see his smile, hear his voice, feel his touch.
“No.”
Connie’s mouth thinned. “You know, it would be a damn shame if Jamie Roberts was still pulling your strings.”
It might have been nerves, or the lack of sleep from the night before, but Connie’s comment pissed Beth off all the way down to her toes. That it hit a tad too close to home may have had a little to do with it, and that she would keep to herself. Because their friendship meant more to Beth than a pointless argument, she hid her annoyance by clearing a spot on her desk for her laptop.
“The only one pulling my strings is administration and the meeting I have in”—she checked her watch—“oh, shit, twenty minutes.”
“Hmm.” If Connie had more to say, she kept it to herself. “You up for pizza and a movie this weekend?”
“Sure. Give me a call later and we’ll set it up.” Grateful that Connie had taken the hint and let the subject drop, Beth reached for her laptop case. Connie shot her a thumbs-up, tucked the giant candy bar under her arm, and left.
Beth tipped her head from side to side, stretching muscles taut with tension. She could blame the tight bands cording her neck and shoulders on the job. Or she could admit the truth and be done with it. In spite of her busy schedule, thoughts of Gabe intruded into her days…as well as her nights. More than once she’d questioned her reasons for adhering to their agreement, and more than once, she asked herself, Dammit, have I made the biggest mistake of my life?
It shouldn’t have been so difficult, letting Gabe walk out that door and out of her life. She had watched him pull on his clothes, covering the body that had given her pleasure far beyond anything she could have imagined. His smiling face haunted her. The memory of his touch tormented her. He had broken through her defenses and breathed life back into her.
And you sent him away, that needling voice in her head mocked.
I want to see you again. She clung to those words as she would to a life preserver in a stormy sea. For a moment, just a moment, she thought how wonderful it would feel to be with him again…then caught herself.
One night only. No romance. No complications. No relationship.
Her stipulations.
So why did she have this hollow spot in her chest? Why, after spending one afternoon and one night in the arms of this magnificent man, did thinking about him cause so much angst?
She flipped the lid back on the computer case. A small square of yellow paper waved back at her, as it did each time she opened it. Twice she’d peeled it off and tossed it in the trash, only to snatch it out again and smooth it back onto the computer lid, as if having it there kept a part of him close.
She peeled it off now and ran her finger over the number. The hole in her chest deepened.
She missed him.
Beth fell back against her chair and her breath came out in a woosh. There. She admitted it, and the heaviness pressing down on her chest lightened just a little. How long since she’d missed a man? Not since Jamie…
Beth shot up in her chair. Goosebumps prickled her arms. Her fingers tightened around the little piece of yellow paper. Oh God, Connie was right. Jamie was still pulling her strings, controlling her life…even from the grave. Her heart rate kicked up a notch, her jaw tightened. No. She was allowing him control. Her stomach roiled at the injustice.
No more.
She took out her phone. Her fingers trembled as she entered Gabe’s number, and then she hesitated. What if he didn’t want to talk to her, let her call go to voicemail, and deleted it without hearing what she had to say? Or worse, what if he picked up, her nerves kicked in, and she rattled off some idiotic garble that made no sense and he hung up on her?
She could text him, but that was so impersonal. She wanted to hear his voice.
Her thumb hovered over the call tab as a terrifying thought occurred. What if he’d changed his mind? What if she’d hurt him with her thoughtless comparison to Jamie and he decided she wasn’t worth the trouble, told her to take her one night mantra to a proctologist for advice on the best place to stick it?
Then again, what if she didn’t contact him, and missed out on the chance of a lifetime? How would she know if she didn’t at least give it a try?
It was time to stop living in the world of what ifs.
And the first thing she needed to do was apologize for hurting him.
She took a fortifying breath and hit Call. Please, please don’t go to voicemail. The things she had to say, she didn’t want to leave on a machine. He picked up on the third ring.
“Dr. North.”
Seconds ticked by, and then she took a breath. “Hi, Gabe. It’s Beth.”
“Beth?” Surprise resonated in his voice. “How are you?”
She swallowed
. “I’m good. You?” Gah, could she sound any lamer?
“Good. On the road.”
Beth’s foot tapped a rapid tattoo on the carpet. A conversation like this could go on for hours without ever saying anything…or she could just spit it out.
“I…ah, just called to say…” Please don’t let me mess this up. “…I’ve been thinking about what I said, just before you left…”
“Yeah?” Was that hope in his voice?
“About things being good with Jamie at first…I wasn’t making a comparison. I’m sorry if I hurt you.”
His hesitation in answering confirmed it. “Oh. Apology accepted. Don’t ever be afraid to say what you feel, Beth. Not to me.”
It’s now or never, Beth. Just say it. “I’ve changed my mind.”
Silence. Her stomach plunged.
“Changed your mind as in…” Caution trailed words that were neither question nor comment.
“As in…us, if you still…”
“Yes, I still do.” The ring of finality in his voice left no doubt.
It was as if someone pulled the plug on the tension reserve stored in Beth’s body and happiness rushed in and filled it back up.
Someone knocked on Beth’s door, and as usual, a head poked in before she could either say yea or nay. The head of radiology held up his wrist and tapped the face of his watch. “Meeting at two.”
Beth checked her own watch and groaned. “Be right there.”
“You have to go?” His deep voice held both regret and resignation.
“I do, I’m sorry. Another meeting,” she sighed. “There’s so much more I need to say.” Another department head stopped at her door, waved for Beth to follow, and then dashed away. “But I really need to go.”
Gabe cleared his throat. “I need to tell you…” Her pager went off, another reminder to get it in gear. “But duty calls,” he sighed. “I’m glad you called, Beth. I’ve missed you.”
Her heart sputtered, and then resumed with a rapid thump against her ribs. The hollow cavity in her chest expanded and the oddest sensation crept in and tested the space. Joy, long absent when associated with the opposite sex, welled up and surrounded her heart in its warm embrace.
“I’ve missed you, too,” Beth admitted as yet another head peeked in and nodded for her to follow. “I’m sorry, I have to go. Talk to you after?”
“Oh, yeah, you can bank on it.”
Beth ended the call, grabbed a legal pad and a pen, and headed for the meeting. Her heels clicked on the shiny tile floor with renewed purpose as she clipped down the hall to the conference room. The Beth she’d seen in the mirror at the hotel was back and it felt damn good.
Chapter Twelve
Beth glanced at her watch and smothered another unsatisfying, closed-mouth yawn. The Chief Financial Officer clicked his remote, flashing yet another slide of brightly colored graphs across the huge, pull-down screen in the conference room. The nasal, monotonous drone of his voice caused her eyes to glaze over, and if he didn’t wind it up soon, she’d be drooling like Homer Simpson.
She cast a surreptitious glance around the long, oval table and saw the occasional neck rub or pencil tapping on a notepad. At least she wasn’t the only one having trouble concentrating. However, she was willing to bet none of them had been awakened in the middle of the night by a pulsing orgasm after a restless, erotic dream of a ponytailed doctor with a very talented tongue. The dream had been so vivid Beth could swear she smelled his scent on her pillow. Hopefully that dream would soon become reality. She didn’t know where this…relationship was headed or where it would end, but now that she’d made the decision to move forward with it, she was anxious to get started.
Papers rustled around the table. People shifted, rearranging themselves in their chairs.
Finally—blessedly—the screen went blank, the CFO resumed his seat, and the lights flickered back on. Blinking, Beth caught a glimpse of her reflection in the floor-to-ceiling windows on the other side of the conference table and quickly pulled herself up from her slump.
Straightening her small pile of handouts, she clipped them together as the CEO, Brad Crawford, began his update on the upcoming construction of the new Emergency Department. She jotted down dates for meetings and projected deadlines around doodles, squiggles, and hearts.
Hearts, for crying out loud!
Brad’s cell phone rang and he apologized before taking the call. “Great, send him up!” He ended the call and addressed the meeting. “Our new ER medical director is on his way up.” Murmurs of surprise and missed memos circulated the room. He held up his hand and order resumed. “As you know, we had narrowed it down to two applicants. I got the acceptance call this morning from our first choice, and didn’t see the point in sending out a memo as he was joining us for the meeting today.”
As administration and the medical executive committee were conducting the interviews, the only contact Beth had with the potential hires was during ER tours. She had been out of town at corporate meetings on some of those days and had missed meeting a couple of them.
Her phone made a little zip sound in her jacket pocket. She slipped it out and snuck a look at the screen.
Are your eyes crossed yet?
Connie was an evil twit, but at least it broke up the monotony of waiting for their guest to arrive. Beth reread the text and grinned. There was a good chance Gabe was in need of a boredom breaker at his own meeting.
She typed in her message, pulling from one of her favorite movies.
Pop quiz: You have a bottle of wine, no glass, and a powerful thirst. What do you do?
The little zip sounded and a green balloon appeared on the screen with her message inside it. Beth snickered and dropped the phone in her pocket—it could be hours before he got the message.
A knock sounded on the door at her back.
“Ah, good.” The CEO stood and walked around the table to open the door. “Welcome, Dr. North.”
Beth’s head popped up. Whaaaa…? No, it couldn’t be! She started to turn, and then caught the reflection of the two men in the window across from her.
Oh. My. God.
The CEO extended his hand and said something, but all Beth heard was a ringing in her ears. The man standing in the door looked up from the phone in his hand, a huge smile on his handsome face. A face she knew all too well—a face that had hovered over hers while he thrust inside her until she screamed her pleasure.
Gabriel North.
Her Gabe.
The ringing in Beth’s ears subsided as she watched Gabe slide his phone into his shirt pocket. He took the CEO’s hand, gave it a firm shake. “Thank you. Sorry.” He tapped his pocket. “A very important message that required an immediate reply.”
Zip! Beth dragged her gaze from the window and pulled her phone out of her pocket.
Pour it on the freckle between your legs and lick it off.
Beth blinked down at the screen. The little sound that left her throat got her coworker’s attention. He craned his neck, trying to get a look at her phone. She dropped it back in her pocket like a hot potato and gave him a weak smile. “New horoscope app. Really…detailed,” she whispered.
“Ah.” He pursed his lips and whispered back, “Sounds like things are looking up.”
She gave him a noncommittal, “Hmm.”
People rose from their chairs, exchanged handshakes and introductions with Gabe and exited the conference room. His scent reached her just seconds before he did. Beth drew in a breath, filled her lungs with him. How could this be? She stood, took a breath, and turned.
“…And lastly, this is Beth Roberts, our nursing manager of the ER. The three of us will meet later in the week and get your take on the construction project for the expansion. You two will be working together with the architect on the layout, bouncing ideas off each other…”
Gabe’s smile softened as she slid her palm across his. Although his grin was a little too wide for two professionals meeting for the first time, no one
seemed to notice as they shuffled out of the room and off to their prospective departments. She couldn’t believe he was here, in her hospital, and they would be working together. Her stomach took a low dip on the emotional roller coaster she was riding today. Less than an hour ago, they had agreed to start seeing each other. Well, they certainly would be, it seemed, but in a professional sense.
Of all the hospitals in all the towns, he walked into hers. Was her life a classic movie or what? Following up on a fling was a lot different than having an affair with a coworker. She studied his face, expecting to see the surprise and confusion bombarding her reflected back, but his eyes held the same determination as when he’d crossed the lawn and parked himself at her table at the wedding.
The shock of realization hit her full force. He’d known this was her hospital, that she’d be here, and he hadn’t mentioned it when they’d spoken on the phone. Conflicting emotions assailed her from every direction. Joy. Uncertainty. The gnawing pain of a lie by omission.
This could not be happening. Not now. Not when she’d just worked up the confidence to attempt a relationship with him. Every fiber in Beth’s body yearned to run to him, say, to hell with whatever reason brought him here, even as she struggled with the uncertainty squeezing her heart.
First things first, and right now she had to get through this moment as gracefully as possible.
“It’s nice to meet you, Dr. North. I hope you’ll be happy working with us here at Ridgemount.” She struggled to maintain an even, unaffected tone, but her voice came out a little tremulous, a bit on the husky side. He hesitated only a second before picking up on her cue to keep the fact that they’d already met to themselves. His fingers tightened around hers, just enough to reassure her they were on the same track…and send a sizzle of heat up her arm.
“Thank you, I’m sure I will be.” His eyes bore into hers, confident and sure. Trust me. The command was there, as surely as if he’d spoken it aloud. A flicker of hope sparked in her heart.
The persistent chirp of the CEO’s pager pulled Beth back to the moment. She tugged her hand from Gabe’s, curled her fingers into a loose fist, and let it drop to her side.
