by Oram, Jean
“You have parents, don’t you?” he said, brushing off the comment.
“They never did that sort of thing.”
Rob scoffed.
“I was nothing more than a chess piece in their game against each other when they divorced. The courts wanted me to choose, and there was nobody to protect me. So, I ran away and moved in with the first person to tell me he loved me.”
She swung her legs around so she could lean against the shower beside Rob. He took her hand, rubbing her knuckles with his thumb.
“So, he protected you?”
It was her turn to scoff. “Sure, he protected me by doing my best friend behind my back while I worked my ass off in his parents’ store.” She choked back the bitterness.
He gave her hand a squeeze, saying nothing.
She glanced at him and let a wicked grin fly. “We should do that bar brawl thing again. I really want to slam a stool over someone’s back. It always looks so good in the movies.”
“Are you nuts?” He pulled back his hand, holding it in front of him. “That hurt like slamming my fist into the side of a truck.”
“Was that the first time you ever punched someone?”
“First punch thrown since I was a kid,” he said, cradling his sore hand.
She smiled. “Really?”
He gave a bashful smile, wiggling his feet back and forth.
She tipped her head back, studying the white ceiling. “Don’t tell anyone I kissed you.”
“Never happened,” he said, voice thick.
She breathed a sigh of relief.
“Because I kissed you,” he said, pulling on her chin, turning her lips to meet his.
She laughed as their lips parted. She ran her hands down her legs. Worries battered her like moths against a porch light. She really wanted to kiss him again.
“I wouldn’t want you or your work to be discredited due to perceived favoritism. The word would get back to Judge Radcliff. Everything does.”
“I understand.” He took her hand again, looking sad.
She leaned her head against the shower door, her goose egg throbbing. “This isn’t going to work, is it?” she whispered, blinking back tears. “The timing’s all wrong.”
He shifted to face her, taking her chin between his thumb and finger. His eyes were a warm, soft gray. She tipped closer to him, his body heat soaring through her, filling her veins with everything she lacked.
He gave her a gentle kiss, and frustrated by his care, she grabbed his head, keeping his lips planted on hers as she swung herself into his lap. If they were going to do this, they were going to do this.
Rob let out a moan and she couldn’t tell if it was from longing or from the way she was applying pressure to his sore lip. She loosened her grip, but his hands immediately wrapped around her back, keeping her close. She rocked against him, her tongue delving into his mouth, her teeth scraping his lips as they destroyed each other’s boundaries and walls, the heat between them escalating until she had to push him away, afraid of what she might do if she continued.
“You are irresistible, you know that? You’re like a sip of coconut rum after a day in the scorching sun,” she said against his lips, tasting him, unable to resist wanting more. Wanting to explore every inch of him and more. More, more, more.
He ran a hand down to her waist, drawing her hips closer. His fingers laced lines down her leg, leaving thrilling tremors skittering through her body. He pushed her hair back, running his fingers through its length. She sighed and tried to hold back a tremble. There was nothing as sensual as having someone else run their hands through your hair. The gentle tug on each hair was as though he’d strummed over every nerve ending, a low base that hummed deep within her.
It had been so long that she’d been touched, felt wanted. Tears sprung to her eyes, and he cupped her face, peering into her eyes. “What?”
She shook her head, tears breaking from their dams.
He hugged her close, pulling her against his chest. Quietly, he hugged her against his chest, stroked her hair. Comforted her until she’d broken through the wave of emotion, leaving her hooked into him so deep and with feelings so strong she knew she was in really big trouble.
CHAPTER 9
Jen, tucked between Dina and Rob, kept her hands tightly clasped so she wouldn’t reach out and pet Rob’s leg which sometimes drifted over toward her on the bench seat of his truck. He shifted gears to take another curve in the mountain road, making Dina slightly greener around the gills. His electric fingers grazed Jen’s bare knee, and her body responded to his touch. She’d finally peeled herself off him last night, then sat on the bathroom floor and talked until the sun started creeping into the sky. As a result, she felt closer to Rob, and had a stronger connection. But not enough to feel calm about meeting his parents—especially for a Father’s Day brunch.
Rob pulled up in front of the highway’s restaurant. “Last chance to bail.”
Jen straightened, ready to take him up on the offer.
“Too late.” Dina pointed to a couple waving eagerly from the diner’s window.
Rob held the truck door for Jen, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze as he helped her out of his side of the vehicle.
Jen lagged behind as Rob’s mother engulfed Dina in a quick hug, then Rob. His mother gripped his chin, eyes on his bruised lip as she tsked. Their father rested a hand on Rob’s shoulder before giving Dina an arm-around-the-shoulder squeeze as the kids wished him a happy Father’s Day.
They were like a movie family. Happy. Smiling. Glad to see each other. No hidden agendas making them shoot snake eyes at each other or angling to position themselves closer to the person they needed to beg a favor from.
Jen thought of her own family. They’d been like this when she was a kid. She remembered going to overnight camp in fifth grade and when they reunited after the two days away, her parents had been this happy. At ease. Could they have something similar now that they were on the other side of the divorce? Had they tried to reach out to her when she was with Ken, but she’d been too busy running away? Were they trying to respect what Cody had led them to believe were her wishes—to be alone? To not be followed? What would happen if she called them up?
Rob’s mother, noticing Jen off to the side, bodily pushed Rob aside before unapologetically sizing up Jen. She had Dina’s curls and inquisitive eyes. She gripped Jen by the arms and beamed. “You must be Jen.”
“Pleased to meet you—” The words were thrust out of her as Mrs. Raine pulled Jen against her for a huge hug.
“Call me Clare. Please.”
She wiggled her fingers at her husband who came forward. “This is Marty.”
He winked and shot her a mischievous smile that reminded her of Rob. He echoed his wife’s emphasis as he said, “Call me Marty. Please.”
Clare, not letting go of Jen, tucked her into the booth beside her. While she was a fit woman, she took up space, making Jen keep her arms tucked at her sides.
Rob sat by the window, hidden behind a menu, leaving Dina the spot across from her mother.
“You didn’t tell me Jen was so pretty,” Clare said to Rob.
Yep. She should have bailed. Stayed ducked down in the truck, taken a nonexistent bus back to Blueberry Springs, pretty much anything. Jen sank a little lower in her seat.
Marty, getting down to business, flagged the waitress and got their meal ordering under way with a directness that reminded her of Dina.
“We heard about your ankle,” Clare said. “Rob’s year of med school finally paid off.” She smiled at Rob with pride.
“Thanks, Mom.”
Clare pushed a binder across to Dina. “I took care of a few more last minute details for your wedding this morning and marked them in the binder.”
“Great.” Dina smiled as she flipped through the pages of notes, clipped photos, ads, business cards and more.
“Wow. You guys are really organized,” Jen said in awe.
Clare turned to Jen,
her brow furrowed in concern. “Oh, I am so sorry. I forgot you just got out of a long-term relationship. How thoughtless of us.” She snatched the binder back from Dina and flipped in closed.
“Um, it’s okay. It was years ago.”
“Oh, good. I’d hate to think you were dealing with a big ol’ heartache while we were discuss Dina’s upcoming wedding.” Her eyes turned sympathetic as Jen eased lower in her seat. She needed to escape all this sympathy for what ended ages ago. “Was it a very long relationship?”
Six years,” she said weakly. She sat still, afraid to draw more attention to herself, not even daring to tip coffee into her system when her body yelled for a top up.
Rob’s cup landed with a bang.
“You were with Ken for six years?” Dina asked, leaning forward with a frown.
“I thought you said…” Rob trailed off, studying her.
“We dated awhile. Lived together awhile.” Please, someone save me.
“Jen’s parents got divorced,” Dina announced.
Great thing to move on to. Thanks, Dina.
“How old were you?” Clare asked.
She swallowed hard. “Sixteen.”
“Was it difficult?” she asked, her voice thick with compassion.
Jen nodded, her throat tight. Too much sympathy. Too much caring. She needed fresh air.
“Oh, my dear.” She gripped Jen’s arm. “Do you see them often?”
Jen swallowed, unable to talk.
“She hasn’t seen them in years,” Dina said.
“Do you still talk on the phone?” Clare asked.
Jen shook her head. It was Father’s Day. She should at least call, shouldn’t she?
“Oh,” Clare said, hand to her chest. “I just knew you were alone.” She leaned past Jen to address Marty. “I could sense it. Couldn’t you sense it?”
Jen inhaled slowly, willing herself to not die on the spot or, worse, faint. She fidgeted and glanced toward the bathroom. She needed to escape before her whole life was laid out for all to see. She glanced at her plate of waffles. Maybe she could stuff her cheeks at the right moment so she could politely decline answering any more questions. Clare didn’t strike her as the type to wait for someone to clear her mouth in order to provide an answer.
“I think Rob should take someone to my wedding,” Dina said.
“I agree,” replied Clare. Rob merely rolled his eyes.
“A girl who is good for him and shares the same interests.” Dina met Jen’s eye. “Someone who’s been down the dating block told me that’s the most important thing in finding a mate.”
Jen let out a strangled sound as though the air had been kicked out of her and tried to make herself smaller in the booth.
Clare and Marty faced Jen. Wow. Her hangover had suddenly become a lot worse.
Clare slung an arm around Jen’s shoulder and smiled.
“Thanks, Dina. Tactless as ever.” Rob stood. “Ever think that maybe the timing on this thing isn’t exactly peachy? And that maybe you could butt out long enough to let me run my own life?”
Clare gasped. “Robert Alvin Raine, sit down before you make a scene.” She pulled Jen into a protective embrace. “I can’t believe you’ve let this forest fire thing run on this long.”
“Mom—”
“A girl like Jen would never start a fire on purpose. What would be the benefit?”
“I know.”
Marty pointed his fork at Rob. “Your mother asked you to sit down and stop making a scene.”
Rob took his seat again and Jen watched him out of the corner of her eyes. If she was feeling awkward and uncomfortable, she could only imagine how Rob felt.
“Rob really needs a date,” Dina said, her voice loaded with disappointment.
“I need to make sure he doesn’t get fired,” Jen said, pushing on Clare to let her out of the booth. “Excuse me. I need to use the restroom.”
Clare let Jen out of the booth. As she neared the bathroom doors she heard Clare say to her kids, “My goodness you two. A little patience would do you a world of good. You’re going to scare off Jen. Be patient. Good things always happen in their own time. And something good is going to happen here.”
Jen heaved herself through the bathroom door, Clare’s words circling through her mind. She braced herself against the sink, head down.
Would good things happen for her and Rob?
Would Rob be afraid of her past? Her dark side?
And what if she did start that fire? What if he was brought in to testify against her?
But most of all, what if he really did like her?
She needed time to breathe. Time to get past this hurdle before figuring out the next one. She needed to run.
* * *
She stared out the window of Rob’s truck, Dina having stayed with her parents to work on last-minute wedding preparations, and quietly worked on sorting out her thoughts. In the distance, a trail of smoke wove its way out of the forest, creating another gray cloud in what was proving to be a gray day. Jen sat up, staring at the cloud. Another forest fire. Forcing herself to sit back in the seat, she clutched her hands together, watching the smoke continue to add to the cloud above.
The brunch had been too much. All that concern and love. She’d felt awkward. But the genuine kindness shown by Clare and Marty had made her love Rob and his family all the more and long to be a part of it. Except for the scary parts, of course. Which was pretty much all of it. Except for the kisses. She could handle more of those form Rob. The only problem was that they made her want more. More of everything. Everything she couldn’t have. Not yet.
She sighed and rubbed her face. Rob seemed intent on showing the world that he liked her. But he couldn’t. Not without consequences. And everything was moving so fast. They’d barely even kissed and she was meeting his family, being invited to Dina’s wedding. She wasn’t ready and she didn’t think he was either. It felt as though everyone was pushing on them. Pushing them into more. What was going to happen when she was ready for happily ever after and he realized he’d taken a wrong turn, not realizing that going with the flow had led him down the matrimonial path? He’d feel obligated, just like he did right now in getting her name cleared. She could see it in the way his demeanor had changed after his mother had given him a few stern looks. He felt obligated to do his best, and she worried that he’d go as far as putting his job on the line.
“I don’t want you to ever feel obligated to me,” she said quietly, letting her words reach across the space between her and Rob. “You don’t have to take care of me, look out for me, protect me. I can stand on my own. I’ll be fine.”
“What are you talking about?” Rob frowned as though she’d suddenly jumped up and done a little jig on his dashboard.
Anger and frustration rushed up inside her, expanding and putting pressure on her tear ducts. Why didn’t he get it? He couldn’t be her rescue hero. They were running down a path she’d already been on and it wouldn’t end well. And the way she’d come to feel about him, she really needed it to end well. “Don’t put on your loincloth for me.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Exactly.” She crossed her arms and stared out the window, struggling not to shut him out, but rather to let him know that she was fighting with some sizeable monsters that had just jumped out from under her bed. “Look, if you want to take me to your sister’s wedding, that’s fine. If you don’t, that’s fine, too. The last thing I want is your family pressuring you into doing something you don’t want to do or something that would lead to trouble.”
“Jen…”
“No. I saw the way Dina was pressuring you when we said goodbye.” She ignored his hurt and confused expression, even though hurt was always so much worse than anger. Anger, over time, dissolved. But hurt…it built up and created irreversible life changes. She’d been there. Wasn’t going there again.
And if she could help it, neither was he.
They rode in silence, frustration comin
g off Rob in waves and translating into sudden jerks of the wheel. Finally, he pulled over at a gas station, rested his arm over the back of the seat, and turned to her. “I get it, Jen. I’m very aware that nobody wants to make the same relationship mistakes twice.”
He locked his gray-blue eyes on hers, making it impossible to look away despite the discomfort she felt inside. Gently, he took her chin in his hand, ensuring she wouldn’t look away. “A relationship is about looking out for the other person, having their back, and sometimes that means protecting them.”
Jen’s breath stuck in her throat. The problem was they weren’t in a relationship. They couldn’t.
“I like you, Jen.”
“I like you, too.” She slipped her face from his grasp. She let out a sigh and rubbed her hands down her thighs.
“Then trust me.” He started up the truck. “And quit projecting your fears onto me.”
She turned to look out the window, hating the way she felt. Needy. Confused. Wanting. How things were getting all stirred up between them, how she felt as though there wasn’t a hope in hell of resolving them, and how everything she tried to do to make it better only seemed to dig her in deeper.
She just needed more time—the one thing she didn’t have.
* * *
“I never know where my boss is going to send me next,” Rob said, breaking their silence as he turned into Blueberry Springs.
This was it. He was breaking up with her. Well, if they’d ever been together…
“It used to be appealing, but now it’s just exhausting and uprooting.” He slowed outside Jen’s favorite house again, and she slouched further in her seat. It wasn’t time for dreams, it was time to hide out, recoup, and figure out how to get over the next hurdle—possibly a prematurely broken heart.
Rob shut off his truck in front of Jen’s apartment.
“Problem is I’m used to having the freedom of making my own hours when I’m on a job and being outdoors. I can’t hack a suit and desk,” he said, grabbing her pack and taking it out to the sidewalk where he waited for her.
