'There's a popular delusion with regard to lovers.'
'We are not such ninnies.'
'But seriously, Theodora, what can induce Fotheringham to have you?'
'I expected you to ask what induced me to have him.'
'That in its own time! Tell me, first, why he takes you.'
'The same reason that you took Violet.'
'As if you and Violet were to be named together!'
'Or you and Percy!'
They laughed, and Theodora then spoke with deep feeling. 'It does surprise me, Arthur, but it is the more pleasure. He has known me all my life, and sees there is less humbug in me than in other women. He knows I have a heart.'
'That scientific discovery is his reason. Now for yours.'
'Because he understands me.'
'So your partnership is founded on a stock of mutual understanding! I devoutly hope it is; for my notion is that Percy will stand no nonsense.'
'Of course not.'
'It remains to be proved how you will like that.'
'I am not given to nonsense.'
Arthur whistled.
'That means that I will not yield when I am not convinced.'
'And he will make you.'
'He will never be unreasonable,' exclaimed Theodora.
'It does not follow that you will not.'
'That is unjust. I yield where duty, good sense, or affection make it needful.'
'Oho! Affection! That is like other people. Now I see some hope of you.'
'Did you think I would have had him without it?'
'Certainly, it is the only explanation. You will not find being wife to a scrub of an attache the same thing as being Miss Martindale.'
'I am glad of it. My mind revolts at the hollowness of my present life.'
'Well done!' ejaculated Arthur.
'I do,' said Theodora, vehemently. 'Ours has never been a home; it was all artificial, and we had separate worlds. You and I amalgamated best; but, oh! Arthur, you never cared for me as I did for you. The misery of my life has been want of affection. Any one who loved me could have guided me at will. You doubt! You don't know what is in me! How I felt as if I would work night and day at my lessons, if they were ever to be heard by mamma! I remember once, after a day's naughtiness, lying awake, sobbing, and saying, again and again, half aloud, "I would be good if they would love me!"'
'No one would have thought such fancies were in a wild colt like you.'
'I would not have had them guessed for worlds. Then came that one gleam of Helen. It was a new life; but it could not last. She went back, and I cannot say things in letters. She told me to talk to John, but he was of no use. He has always despised me.'
'I don't think you are right there.'
'He would help me in trouble, but I am nothing to him. You were all I had, and when you gave yourself away from me I was left alone with the heart-ache, and began to think myself born to live without love.'
'In spite of the lovers you had in London?'
'You know better. That was the Honourable Miss Martindale. What did they know of the real Theodora?'
'Poor critturs, what indeed! They would have run far enough if they had.'
'I knew it. It is the soft, gentle, feminine mould that attracts men.'
'Another curious discovery.'
'I cannot change my nature. But when he comes, superior to them all, understanding my true self, seeing me high-spirited and cold- mannered, but able to look into me, and perceive there is warmth and soundness--oh! is not that a new well-spring of happiness!'
'Yes, he is as much out of the common run of folks as you are. You'll go as well together as Smithson's pair of piebalds. I am satisfied; I only wanted to know whether you cared for him, for you don't "act as sich."'
'I can't talk stuff. I managed pretty well with papa, but I could not bear it with John. He began to praise Percy, which made me ready to cry, and that provoked me: besides, I know he does not believe in me. He cares for Helen's brother far more than for his own sister, and does not think me good enough for him. I saw he thought I should trifle, and meant to give me a lecture; and I could not stand that, you know, so I got away as fast as I could.'
'John does not lecture as you might expect, if you give him his full swing. He is the best and kindest fellow in the world.'
'I know how Percy looks up to him. The only thing I don't like is, that I believe one cause of Percy's attachment is my being his sister.'
'I tell you, Theodora, if you are so outrageously jealous, you will never get through the world in peace.'
'I shall have no reason for jealousy.'
'And for fear he should, had you not better give a hint to Wingfield? You are turning the poor fellow's head with your confabulations over the dirty children, and you'll have him languishing in an unrequited attachment.'
'He understands me too well,' said Theodora.
'You reckon a great deal on understanding! And you put yourselves to the test. Why don't you marry out of hand, and trust to the fates?'
'We have talked it over,' said Theodora. 'As to our income being equal to yours, that is nonsense. We have no expensive habits; but Percy says L450 a year is too little, so we shall wait for the appointment, or till he has made it up to L700. But I own I did not expect such ready consent from papa.'
'Ha! You would have liked a little opposition? You would sing a different song if he had set his face against it. It is very knowing of my aunt to take the line she does.'
'I wish my aunt was twenty years younger!'
'That you might fight it out, eh!'
'One comfort is, she will never leave me her money now! But I must go in, and send Miss Piper for a walk with Harrison. My aunt must be repaying herself on her.'
'Then I shall take another cigar, to get the damp out of my throat.'
'You wretch, you like to boast of it!'
'Ah! you don't know what Percy learnt in Turkey.'
'I know he always abominated smoking.'
'Perhaps he'll let you think so till you are married.'
'For shame, Arthur! That's the way you served your wife.'
'Not I. She is duly grateful to me for only smoking at fit times and places, wherein I don't resemble her precious brother.'
Arthur thus reported this conversation to his wife. 'I met Theodora in the park. She is as remarkable an article as ever I saw.'
'What do you think?--is she really attached to him?'
'I know as little as she does.'
It was determined that the secret should be strictly kept; it was the one point on which Lady Martindale was anxious, being thereto prompted by her aunt. Theodora declared she had no one to tell, and Mr. Fotheringham only desired to inform his uncle and aunt, Sir Antony and Lady Fotheringham. He was now going to pay them a visit before settling in his lodgings in London. Theodora's engagement certainly made her afford to be kinder to Violet, or else it was Percy's influence that in some degree softened her. She was pleased at having one of her favourite head girls taken as housemaid under Sarah's direction, her only doubt being whether Violet was a sufficiently good mistress; but she had much confidence in Sarah, whose love of dominion made her glad of a young assistant.
The party was now breaking up, Violet in high spirits at returning home, and having Arthur all to herself, as well as eager to put her schemes of good management into practice. The sorrow was the parting with John, who was likely to be absent for several years.
Before going he had one last conversation with his sister, apropos to some mention of a book which she wished to send to London to be returned to Miss Gardner.
'Does Violet visit her?' he asked.
'There have been a few calls; Jane Gardner has been very good-natured to her.'
'Is that cousin of theirs, that Gardner, still abroad?'
'Yes, I believe so.'
'I hope he will stay there. He used to have a most baneful influence over Arthur. Theodora, if by any chance it should be in your power, you ought
to do your utmost to keep them from coming in contact. It may be a very superfluous fear, but your intimacy with those ladies might be the means of bringing them together, and there is nothing I should so much dread.'
'Surely Arthur may be trusted to choose his own friends.'
'You don't know what happened in their school days! No, you were too young. It was discovered that there was a practice of gambling and drinking wine in the boys' rooms, and Arthur was all but expelled; but it turned out that he had been only weak, and entirely led by this fellow, and so he was spared. Percy could tell you many histories of Gardner's doings at Cambridge. Arthur's worst scrape since he has been in the Guards was entirely owing to him, and it was evident he still had the same power over him.'
'Arthur is no boy now.'
'I doubt,' said John, half smiling.
'No one can make the least charge against him since his marriage.'
'It has done much for him,' answered John, 'and she has improved wonderfully. Theodora, now that I am going away, let me once more tell you that you are throwing away a source of much happiness by disregarding her.'
'Her romantic friendship with Emma Brandon is a proof that she cannot have much in common with me.'
'There is one thing you have not in common with either,' exclaimed John, 'and that is an unassuming temper.'
'Yes, I know you all think me prejudiced. I do not want you to go away misunderstanding me,' answered Theodora. 'She has good principles, she is amiable and affectionate; but there are three points that prevent me from esteeming her as you do. She has a weak fretful temper.'
'I am sure you have seen no sign of it.'
'It is just what is never shown; but I am convinced poor Arthur suffers from it. Next, she thinks a great deal of her appearance; and, lastly, she is fond of power, and tries to govern, if not by coaxing, by weakness, tears, hysterics--all the artillery of the feeble. Now, a woman such as that I can pity, but cannot love, nor think a fit wife for my brother.'
'I can't tell, I don't know,' said John, hesitating in displeasure and perplexity; 'but this once I must try whether it is of any use to talk to you. Her spirits and nerves are not strong, and they were cruelly tried last spring; but Arthur only saw her cheerful, and never guessed at the tears she shed in secret, till we found her papers blistered with them, when her never complaining and letting him go his own way had almost cost her her life! and if you knew her, you would see that the tendency to over-anxiety is the very failing with which she struggles. I wish I could make you see her in her true light.'
'I cannot help it, John,' said Theodora, 'I must speak the truth. I see how it is. Men are not clear-sighted in judging of a pretty woman of engaging manners. They are under a fascination. I don't blame you--it is exactly the same with papa and Percy.'
'Indeed?'
And for the last time baffled, John parted with his sister in much anxiety and disappointment, such as made it repose to turn to that other gentle, open-hearted, confiding sister, whose helplessness and sympathy had first roused him from despondency and inaction.
He begged her to write to him; an honour and a pleasure indeed; and now there was no fear of her letters being such as that she had sent him at Martindale. He declared the correspondence would be a great pleasure to him--he could not bear to think of hearing of those in whom he took so much interest only at second-hand; and besides, he had been accustomed to pour out his mind so much in his letters to Helen, that he felt the want of full and free confidence. His letters to his mother were not safe from the eye of his aunt, and neither his father nor Mr. Fotheringham could be what a lady correspondent would be to a man of his character, reflective, fond of description, and prone to dwell on the details of what interested him.
So the time of his departure came, whereat Arthur lamented, vowing it was a horrid bore that he could not live in England, and hoping that Barbuda would patch him up for good; while Violet made arrangements for his convenience and pleasure on the voyage, such as no sister had ever supplied for him before.
CHAPTER 11
So she had prayed, and He who hears, Through Seraph songs the sound of tears, From that beloved babe had ta'en The fever and the beating pain, And more and more smiled Isobel To see the baby sleep so well.--E. B. BROWNING (Isobel's Child)
On a bright cold afternoon the next spring, Theodora was setting out for a walk, when she saw a carriage driving up the avenue, and Arthur emerging from it. Joyously she sprang forward--'Arthur! Arthur! this is pleasant. How glad I am. This is like old times.'
'Ay, I thought you would be ready for me. I have had a cold, and I am come home to shake off the end of it.'
'A cold--not a bad one, I hope?'
'Not very. I wanted Violet to come too, but the boy is poorly.'
'Oh! I hope there is not much the matter?'
'Only teeth, I believe. He is desperately fretful, and she can't attend to anything else.'
'Well, I hope you are come for a good long visit.'
'I can stay a week.'
'That's right, it will do you good. I was just going to write to you. I have a great mind to go back with you, if I shall not be in the way.'
'Not at all. It will be famous having you; but what makes you come? To gratify Fotheringham?'
'I have many reasons. I've got Charlie Layton elected to the Deaf and Dumb Asylum, and I must take him there.'
'I'm not going to take him! 'Tis enough to have to carry about one's own babies, without other people's.'
'We'll settle that,' said Theodora. 'Will you walk with me! There is no one at home, and I am stupefied with reading French novels to my aunt. Such horrid things! She has lost her taste for the natural, and likes only the extravagant. I have been at it ever since luncheon, and at last, when the wretches had all charcoaled themselves to death, I came out to breathe fresh air and purity.'
'Where's the Piper!'
'Piper no longer. Have you not heard?'
'Not a word since Percy announced that my aunt and Harrison had come to a split about the orchids.'
'You have great things to hear. Harrison got a magnificent appointment, as he calls it--situation is not grand enough--to some botanic gardens; splendid salary. Nothing hindered the wedding but Miss Piper's dread of my aunt. It was not only that she could not tell her, but she could not face her after it was told, though I offered to undertake that. So the upshot was, that for very cowardice she preferred stealing the match and taking French leave. It was a silly piece of business; but I could not help that, and they were accountable to no one. I promised to announce it to my aunt when the deed was done, and satisfied the poor little woman's conscience by undertaking to be my aunt's white nigger till she bought another.'
'If that's not self-devotion, I don't know what is,' said Arthur. 'I trust she has got one.'
'She comes to-morrow.'
'How was the wedding managed?'
'Harrison came with his license from Whitford, and I walked forth with sal volatile in one hand and salts in the other, administering them by turns to the fainting bride. I dragged her all the way by main strength, supported her through the service, and was very near giving her away by mistake, for there was no one else to do it but old Brand. He and I are the witnesses in the register. I received her hysterical farewells, and Harrison's elegant acknowledgments; saw them into their fly, and came home, trusting to Providence that I could inform my aunt without bringing on a fit.'
'After surviving the news of your engagement she may bear anything.'
'Ah! there she takes refuge in incredulity. Now this was a fact. So there was nothing for it but to take a high tone. I gave the history, and told my own share; then, in the style of Richard II, when Wat Tyler was killed, declared I would be her companion; and, after some bandying of words, we settled down peaceably.'
'One thing amazes me. How did you get Wingfield to do it? I had plague enough with the old parson at Wrangerton, and I should have thought Wingfield harder to manage.'
'They had no
consent to ask--no one could forbid the banns. He soon saw the rights of it,' said Theodora, unable to prevent herself from blushing.
'You talked him over, eh?'
'Arthur, you are looking at me as if you wanted to put me out of countenance. Well, you shall hear the truth; it is safe with you, and no one else knows it. It is my chief reason for wishing to go to London.'
'Ah ha!'
'Yes, you were right in warning me. He must needs think I worked in the parish for his sake; and one fine day, as I was walking home, he joined company, and before I knew where I was he was making me an offer.'
'And learnt what disdain means, if he did not know before.'
'No,' said Theodora, gravely, and blushing deeply. 'I recollected your warning, and saw that if there had not been something like encouragement he would not have forgotten the distance between us. This wedding has occasioned conferences; besides, Percy was exacting at Christmas, and I had rather tried to tease him. I thought, living close by, Mr. Wingfield must have known the state of the case, and that I need not be on my guard; so that, having so far taken him in, I thought it right to tell him I was afraid he had not been fairly used, for I had trusted to his knowing I was engaged. So we parted amicably; but it is a great bore, for he is much more cut up than I expected, poor man. He went from home the next Monday, and is but just come back, looking disconsolate enough to set people wondering what is on his spirits, and avoids me, so as to show them. It would be the best possible thing for me to get out of the way till it is blown over, for I have no comfort in parish work. It has been a relief to be always shut up with my aunt, since that was a reason for not going into the village.'
'Then you will stay till the family migration?'
'I don't think there will be any this year. Papa talks about bad times, and says the season in London is too expensive; and mamma was worried and tired last year, and did not enjoy it, so she will be glad to avoid it and stay with my aunt.'
'And, you being no longer a subject for speculation, there's no object.'
'Yes; I am glad to have ended that hateful consciousness.'
'Well, Violet will do her best for you.'
Heartsease or Brother's Wife Page 27
