by Kim Faulks
I smiled, nodded as my breath slowed. Gabriel was alive…my boy was alive…my girl…lost.
“Doc…Doc!”
I flew forward and then slammed against the seat. The thunder of a car door followed, and he was there—that stranger with beautiful eyes.
“Doc, can you hear me?”
Shadows danced on the other side of the ethereal glow…God’s light.
Belief gave way to calculated purpose. I believed in what I could see. I believed in what I could feel, not God’s light…not Hell’s shadow—fire lashed my chest—I believed in pain.
Doctor, come to me.
The words echoed. So pure, perfect, and it fit his description. I closed my eyes and light washed over me. It was so nice here…so nice and peaceful.
“No, hey there! No…come on now. I’m not leaving you, Doc. I’m not leaving you behind.”
He grabbed me, pulled me forward, something wet and warm brushed my lips.
“Drink it down, Doc. It’s my blood. Drink it down.”
He gripped my jaw and forced apart my lips. I tasted old pennies, rich, like the earth itself.
“That’s the way.”
Faint shadows moved behind the glare…too big for a person, and as the outline sharpened, green eyes cut through the murky fog…
Doctor Angel Leigh… Tell me this, do you want to pass?
I winced as the voice boomed through my head.
The pale, hulking monster loomed over me. Wings stretched upwards and touched the sky. Lightning flared up there, burning midnight blue into the tips of his wings.
Like this beast…this Dragon descended from the Heavens.
His lips curled, revealing razored teeth. Do I frighten you?
I swallowed my fear. “Yes.”
Movement came from the corner. The long massive tail sliced the air, curled upwards and then slammed thick bone-like talons into the earth. I stared down at soft white fog that covered my feet; it came from everywhere and nowhere, dancing around this massive beast.
I held my ground, straightened my shoulders, and met the Dragon’s gaze. He wouldn’t hurt me—I swallowed hard—he was just like my Thorn.
Except this one was all male, stained with divine violence.
Ivory scales glowed as he took a step. I craned my head, looking up past the thick flank and the massive shoulders.
The sudden draw of breath filled my ears. Closer, the Dragon commanded. Bring her closer to me.
Wind buffeted my face, scattering hair into my eyes. I reached up, brushing the strands, and curled them around my ears.
“Go to him, Doc. The Saint…the Saint will help you.”
Whispered words warmed my ear. I reached up touching my lobe, and yet somehow I knew the real me never moved…
You can’t move…can you?
Imploring green eyes watched my every move. He studied me, not like a male, but like a doctor—picking me apart with his mind—to find out what made me…tick.
Do you want to pass?
The deep bass voice rocked the air and then he sniffed.
He was bigger than the black Dragon inside Zadoc. He was bigger than anything I’d ever seen.
Light blazed from the carvings across his face, as though this pure light wasn’t flesh and blood—but something else, something inside him.
Do you want to pass? The growl came again.
My mind raced as I looked past him to the world beyond. Do I want to pass?
Die. The word hit me. He was asking if I wanted to die.
I hovered in the thought, tethered like a balloon on no string. Pain ebbed in the back of my mind and I knew somehow I was already leaving, already shedding this skin to find a new home.
I drew my gaze from the murky light beyond and stared at the Dragon…a home with him?
I licked my lips as an ache flared. I had no home. My parents were gone, my sister buried. I didn’t belong here, not with my kind…and not with his. “Where am I?”
You are with me.
Sparks danced like yellow fireflies in his eyes. He seemed amused, goading. I clenched my jaw. The doctor replaced the woman, adding a sting to my words. “And where is that?”
One immense wing heaved into the air hovering chest high before he slapped the ground. My world.
The fog danced, and light pulsed. I licked my lips and softened my words. “Are we in Heaven?”
Neon green darkened to pine. No… His lips curled, a snarl formed the rest of his words. God and I do not get along…
My lips curled, a smirk took flight. For some strange reason, the idea of that amused me.
And now I ask my question, human. Do you want to pass?
I didn’t look past him to the shadows that waited on the other side of the light. I looked at him, at this beast that stood sentry to my world and the next. I looked at the ancient being and felt a pang in my chest.
He was here with me…keeping me company.
Why?
I turned inward to where the torn flesh and the shattered bones waited. This shell was done. I could feel it, turning inward, slowly dying. A slow, quiet throb filled my head, hovering in the background, but it was fading now.
That me was still alive.
That me waited for death with the faint taste of blood in my mouth.
I should already be dead. I closed my head and traced the pain…shattered ribs, internal bleeding, and my neck. In this dreamlike world, I reached for my throat and found my vein. It’d been a miracle I lasted this long.
That slow, rhythmic pulse called to me, urging me to put the pieces together.
Something was keeping me alive. Something beyond the machines and the science—something beyond everything I knew.
The bitter taste of blood bloomed in my mouth. I licked my lips, but the memory faded and what replaced it was an understanding…a knowing that it was not a something…only a someone.
I turned to the light and the Dragon. “No, I don’t think I want to pass at all.”
Good, he growled and those murky eyes brightened. Then you’ll stay here with me.
He drove taloned nails into the misty ground and rose to his full height. Wings scraped, and then lifted into the air. Long bones drove higher, stabbing the darkened sky above. Lightning flared, shooting bolts into the tips of his wings.
The bitter stench of ozone pinched my nose as the thunderous crack tore free. The beast rode that charge of energy, harnessed it, and then wielded it like a weapon.
But the battle wasn’t out here with the cold and the dark and the mist at my feet—it was inside him.
His body brightened, glowing like a lightbulb riding the current. I winced from the glare and dragged my hand up to my face.
“Doctor.”
Sparks danced behind my eyes. Dull pink of my eyelids lightened, turning white until I didn’t just see the burning glow—I felt it.
“Doctor, can you hear me?”
“I’m not afraid of God.” I turned to the Dragon and the light. “And I’m not afraid of you.”
A rumble filled the air, dark and deep like that bottomless black lake. It took form in a chuckle and grew in crescendo until the sound filled me with the violent roar of rapturous male laughter.
“Angel, can you hear me?”
I opened my eyes ready to see a bright green gaze filled with amusement and stared at a red bulbous nose. Spidered veins cut across the ridge. His brow furrowed, brown eyes searched mine. He scowled, shone a pen light into my eyes and then eased backwards.
“There she is. Good to see you, Angel. You had me worried there for a bit.”
The light was softer. Faint beeps of a cardiac monitor crammed my head. Pain came alive like a distant memory pushing to the forefront with a rush. I sucked in a breath and then stiffened from the pain.
“Easy there,” Doctor Elon Marks cautioned. “You're not out of the woods just yet.”
“Where…” The word was nothing more than a hiss lashing my throat with fire.
E
lon frowned. “Flinders Public Hospital. You’re back home.”
Home. That word echoed deeper than it should, lingering somewhere where I couldn’t feel. I took it slow, licked my lips, drew a breath and asked. “How…long?”
“Three days.”
I closed my eyes. The room seemed to sway. Another question burned brighter than any… Light of God, the words filled my head as I spoke. “Thorn.”
Elon leaned closer and turned his head. I stared at the hair that sprouted from his ears and forced the word again. “Thorn.”
He leaned backwards. “I don’t understand the question, Angel. Your injuries—”
“Baby.” Fire lashed through my chest. I swallowed blood and forced the word. “Dragon.”
A darkness swept through his gaze. He pursed his lips until they were nothing more than a bloodless slash across his mouth and lowered his head. “Anything I say isn’t gospel. You must understand that. But the nurses talk, especially when…” He looked away, staring at the wall and finished. “When their bloodshed comes to our door.”
Their bloodshed…
I dropped my gaze to my fingers. They sat like bloodied, broken sticks of nothing on the end of my hands.
“You have two broken ribs, a concussion, a lacerated spleen, that they did their best to repair, and a badly infected cut around your ankle…those are the worst injuries. But your back…”
I met his gaze as he stilled. “My back?”
“The tears are substantial, Angel. Deep, scars are…”
A harsh bark of laughter ripped free and the sudden stab of agony followed. I didn’t care about tears. I didn’t care about scars. I latched hold of the rail and tried to breathe while Elon’s piercing voice rattled in my brain.
“Easy. You have to take it easy, Angel. You’re going to need to stay here for at least another four days until you’re stable.”
His voice dulled and moved to the back of my mind. There was something else calling me, faint, urgent, a tiny howl bounced around in my mind…a memory…a memory…
“Are you hearing me, Angel? Do you understand what I’m saying? One more blow, one more bite and we would’ve lost you. You’re not immortal, Angel. You're not one of them.”
I couldn’t nod, couldn’t speak, couldn’t do anything but cling to that faint sound that grew claws inside my head.
“I want you to understand how serious this is. You died on that operating table, Angel. You died and there was no way in Hell we could bring you back…but we did. By some goddamn miracle we did.”
A mist seemed to swell inside my mind, folding and unfolding all around me as that faint wail turned to bloodless screams. The piercing sound bounced off the walls and impaled my chest.
My hands shook as I gripped the railing. I stared at the doorway until my vision blurred.
“What the Hell is that racket?” Elon snapped.
I didn’t answer. I didn’t need to. I only needed to cling to that howl as she slipped around the doorway.
Tiny black paws kicked and stretched as the baby wolf fought his mother’s hold. My breath caught as I tore my gaze from the wriggling bundle to cold, unflinching eyes. “Joslyn.”
She glanced to the doctor, and then around the room where the ECG beeped and flared, and stopped inside the doorway.
“You…you can’t bring that in here.”
I flinched with the command. My top lip curled. The urge to strike reared, cutting through fear and pain. “He’s not a that, Elon. He’s a child, a baby. Have some fucking respect.”
A small grunt slipped out of the man, as if I’d just kicked him in the balls. Maybe I had. Maybe he deserved it. The thought filled me, and Joslyn was quiet as she moved deeper into the room, but underneath her emotionless mask there was a seething river of hate.
She wasn’t the same young woman I’d met days before. Gone was the shine in her blonde hair, gone was the pale pink glow of her skin. The lackluster oily strands hung limp around her face, serving to cover her eyes as she stared at the floor.
I knew the woman she once was. I could feel that woman, even sweat-stained and in the throes of labor, I could feel her. She had fight. She had spunk. She had everything this woman didn’t.
“I…I’ll just leave you two alone then,” Elon stuttered and made for the door.
I never gave him a second glance as he scurried behind Joslyn and left, only stared at this stranger who held my heart.
“He won’t settle.”
The words were like cracks through glass, shaking and shattering. She lifted her head to stare at me and for a second I couldn’t breathe. Hopelessness and pain leaked from those dark brown eyes.
The baby in her arms kicked and bucked until his spine bowed and he collapsed in her hold.
“He doesn’t want me.”
Agony ripped through my chest and welled in the back of my throat. My fingers twitched, breasts ached. He was not my son…he was not my baby. “He’s just scared,” I murmured. “He needs more time.”
Rage flared, burning red in her gaze. “Don’t you dare tell me what my child needs. He’s not yours.”
I flinched and breathed in her hurt and anger. Desperation screamed. I wanted to look at him, feel him…love him, but I never moved, only stared at her. Primal instinct reared as she dropped her focus to my neck.
“You gave him your blood. Zadoc said you saved him, even an immortal can be killed when they’re young.”
My pulse filled my ears with the panicked sound. My tongue skirted my lips, finding the cracks and the sting of fresh skin.
Choked words slipped from her lips. “It’s been three days and he still can’t stand the feel of my arms.”
My hands shook, my muscles trembled. I could almost feel his body, almost kiss his cheek and feel the points on his sharp little fangs. Phantom teeth carved my neck to find a vein.
I could still feel him limp in my arms.
Still feel the utter desperation.
I had one thing left…one simple thing left.
And I had no time.
“He stopped crying.” Tears slipped from my eyes as the horror came to life. “We’d had no water for days, barely any before that.”
Need balanced on the edge a blade. I sucked in the scent of pine and fir and waited. I’d sell my soul to spare her. No mother should ever hear something like this.
She looked at me as though I was the devil, as though I was the one who caused this.
I was just a woman—no more, no less. “After…” My voice turned thick and useless. I swallowed. My words squeezed around the lump in my throat. “After they took her he just stopped crying. I didn’t notice, not for a while and I’m so sorry for that. But I was barely alive, barely breathing. I had nothing to give him, but flesh and blood.” I lifted my head and met her gaze. “So I gave him that.”
Those dark eyes widened.
“I’m so sorry.” I dropped my gaze to the bundle against her breast.
My own breast ached. My own heart craved. He wasn’t mine…I knew that. She took a step and my heart shattered in two. She said nothing, only opened her arms. The white and black wolf howled and thrashed.
“Hey there…hey, settle down now.”
He clawed the air with taloned nails and screeched like a damn banshee. Black and white fur glistened under the harsh overhead lights. Five days we waited in the dark and the filth…five days would mean nothing to him in time…but right now, it meant everything.
Those blue eyes widened as he settled into my arms. The screech slowed, turning to a mewl. He was heavier, but not by much. His belly was sunken, chest hard and barreled. Tiny pointed ears with tufts of black fur.
“He won’t take my breast, won’t drink from the bottle. I even tried a nursing mother from the Bloodstone pack. He screamed and clawed her, until she tried no more.”
He opened his mouth, stretched out his tongue and yawned as if to say, What’s all the fuss about? I licked my lips and dragged him close and as though by instinct
, he opened his eyes and stared at me.
We’d shared something in that cabin, something not beautiful like life and living, but something desperate, something dark and infernal filled with the kind of terror that stains your soul.
Those perfect blue eyes blurred. Tears slipped from the edge of my jaw to splatter the white tuft on his chest. The strands darkened, sticking to pale skin underneath. Joslyn rustled in a bag over her shoulder and drew a baby’s bottle free.
“I expressed my milk,” she murmured. “I was hoping somehow…”
“That if I gave him your milk it’ll help him take to your breast?”
“You say it like I’m taking something from you. He’s mine…,” she growled, staring at the bottle in her hand.
There was a moment where I could’ve reached her, where I could’ve said the things she needed to hear. I ached for her. I ached for me. My heart clawed its way into my throat as I looked down at him.
He was not of my flesh, nor was his blood my blood. But his soul whispered a song mine heard, and it was that song I clung to, that song that filled me as I lifted his perfect body and pressed it to my face.
“He’s not yours,” Joslyn whispered and shoved the bottle into my hand.
I gripped the plastic and lowered him against my breast. He turned his head and nuzzled my body with a cold nose just as he’d done so many times before. I’d tried to protect him, with my blood and my body. I kept him covered, hidden underneath the dead and the dying.
I eased the plastic teat between his lips. Sharp teeth bit down. “Easy, easy there, no biting.”
Pale milk splashed the inside. He curled his tongue around the nipple, cheeks bowed, drawing softly. “That’s the way. That’s the way, drink little one.”
He sucked and swallowed, drawing deeper with every pull.
I balanced the edge of my hand against his chest, feeling the steady throb of his heart through his skin. “You miss your sister don’t you?”
The sight lulled me, moving the pain to the back of my head, and almost out of reach. Dark penetrating eyes surfaced, glistening inky scales shimmered, slick and smooth under the tips of my fingers. I could feel him now, the longing, the need, the quiet desperation that never went away. “You miss our Thorn, our beautiful, vicious tempered Thorn.”
