“I promise,” I mutter barely above a whisper. He looks up at me, worry in his eyes. I brush my hand across his cheek. “It’s okay.” I try to sooth him. He grabs my injured hand and presses his lips to my palm for what feels like hours. When he let’s go, I back away from his grasp so he can get up. His eyes never leave mine as he gets to his feet. He takes a step to me and puts his finger under my chin tipping it up to his face. He barely brushes his soft pillow lips to mine and then let’s me go to move to the door.
“Stay,” I don’t even know if I say it aloud. He stops his progress to the door so I must have. “Just hold me tonight.” I feel so weak right now, but I need someone to hold me in their arms tonight. He doesn’t look back at me or make a move, so I crawl into bed and turn out my lamp. I can take care of myself. That’s twice now, I’ll not be rejected a third time that’s for damn sure. I’m sure he’s gone when I feel my bed dip and his arms engulf me. He pulls my back to his front and holds me firm against his body. I feel safe. That’s the last thing I remember thinking before I drift off to sleep.
I wake to voices in the distance.
“Jason came up to us and told us he saw her on the security cameras,” Kavy’s explaining. “We beelined it to where she was. All I saw was her with blood on her and dude bent over.” He’s confused and upset.
“We were walking through the dance floor and she wouldn’t let me hang onto her,” Kel’s filling in the blanks. I open my eyes to see them standing at the end of my bed. Kavy is shirtless his gladiator body still glistening after a shower, I assume. His intricate tattoo covered pecs bounce and flex while his arms are moving constantly as he talks and listens. I stare at our clover and let the warmth of its symbol encapsulate me. Kel is still shirtless. His back is to me and he has his hands laced together behind his head. His back is sculpted like a Michelangelo statue, perfection. His pajama pants are low on his hips barely covering what appears to be a rock hard succulent ass. If I could, I’d have morning wood right now!
“I fucked up and she was pissed at me,” Kel sighs, “probably still is. Anyway, I made my way all the way to the door, then I looked back and she wasn’t there. She had just been there. I couldn’t figure out where she was so I started makin’ my way back, but it was slow movin’,” his tone is irritated, at himself. “I could see her man, but I couldn’t get to her and she didn’t hear me yellin’ her name. He tried rammin’ his tongue down her throat and I think she kicked him, I couldn’t see that well. She tried to get away from him but he snatched her back up and said something to her. Her fuckin’ face changed when he said whatever that was.” He drops his hands from his neck and bows his head. “It was pain and rage mixed together. I’ve never seen anything like that.” He scrubs his hands over his face and rests them on the top of his head, he’s yummy.
“She reached back and clocked that motherfucker, like it was her job! Over and over again. That dude was so taken off guard he didn’t move. That was no chick move. It was aggressive and stout. It’s what I woulda done. You saw the rest.” He drops his hands and plops down on the end of my bed. I pretend this wakes me up and look up at Kavy.
“Hey,” I smile at him, “I thought you’d just get your dick wet, not take a swim in it.” I’m funny.
Kavy shakes his head at me but chuckles.
“We gotta talk, Kid.” His face in gentle but serious. “All of us.” He motions a finger spinning in circles.
“Awesome,” I snark and sit up, “is there coffee served at the black site?”
“It’s not like that, we just need to talk. Yesterday was a clusterfuck! Put some clothes on and come downstairs. Everyone’s waitin’.” He’s bossing me around, but I don’t have the energy to fight.
“I’m gonna head to my place to shower and change. I’ll be back in a half hour,” Kel says to Kavy.
“Why?” I ask confused.
“He’s a part of this conversation, Kid. We asked him to be here.” I flop back down in my bed. I feel like a teenager getting a family sit down. At least I think that’s the feeling, having never experienced it! FUCK!
“Cool,” full on sarcasm. “Why don’t you conference call all your families in too? I’m sure they would love in on this. Maybe get everyone from the firm in on it too. I mean, obviously this is a matter of national security.” With that rant Kel is up off my bed looking at me. Glaring is a more appropriate term.
“I’ll be back in thirty,” he says to Kavy, not breaking eye contact with me. Kavy claps him on the back and I roll my eyes. During the eye roll Kel leaves the room. Kavy is still standing there staring at me.
“You’ve got a half hour to get your boney ass downstairs, or I’m comin’ back for you.” I glare at him. “You can shoot daggers at me all you want, but this is happening. I will drag your ass down the stairs and hold you in my lap until this conversation happens. Thirty minutes.” He turns and leaves the room, slamming my door before I have an opportunity to cuss, hit, or spit at him. He’s right, we need to talk. I’m done with this “everyone owns me” bullshit. They must have forgotten who I am, I’ll remind them.
I head to my bathroom and fill my tub, adding some vanilla and honey bath cream. I will soak away the tension and be in a better frame of mind for our talk. I don’t want to fight with my boys. Nothing has felt right for the last twenty-four hours, and I’m done with that. I slip into the tub sighing in release. After a good long soak I do feel better, but I’m in need of coffee. I dry off and lotion up. Skinny jeans, white tank, Stanford hoodie, and fuzzy brown boot slippers (Sunday uniform) complete my ensemble. No makeup and hair tied in a messy bun on top of my head. I look sexy.
I’m out my bedroom door when Kavy crests the stairs. I roll my eyes at him.
“Let’s get this done,” I say, as I brush past him down the stairs. He’s in loose jeans and a long sleeved, dark green T-shirt. I see the usual suspects laid about the sectional. Cally looks like he’s seen better days, lounging in sweats, an arm draped across his eyes. Finn got laid based on the look on his face. He’s got on a similar outfit to Kavy, but a white shirt instead. Sully is stretched out on his stomach, hoodie and shorts, his usual. Kel is standing at the breakfast bar pouring a mug of coffee. Dark charcoal thermal Henley skin tight across his broad shoulders, low slung loose jeans and brown leather boots. I want to lick him.
“Mornin’,” Finn says brightly as I pass the couch and head to the coffee. I give him a half smile. These people know I’m not a morning person…What the fuck?!
“Hey, Kid,” Sully and Cally mumble in unison. I don’t respond, they’re mostly asleep anyway. I reach Kel and wait for him to finish with the coffee.
“How do you take it?” Kel asks.
“Black.” He pushes the mug he just filled toward me and lifts another to his lips. A box of LaMar’s Donuts is sitting on the other side of him. I grab a chocolate long john from around him and stuff it in my mouth. Heaven! He never looks at me, just turns and walks to the breakfast table. Kavy follows, as does Finn.
“Come on Sleeping Beauties,” Finn chides Cally and Sully. They grumble but move to the table too. I’m the last to join the group. I take the last seat between Sully and Kel. I set my mug on the table and pull my hood up over my head, cross my arms over my chest, slouch down in the seat, and pull my left foot up to the seat so my knee is mostly blocking my face. I stare at Kavy who is right in front of me, “talk” my stare says.
He clears his throat and starts, “We all just wanted to sit down and talk after everything that happened yesterday.” He nods around the table and they nod back. It’s like sitting at a table of bobble heads.
“We all know you’re an adult, Kid.” The irony of that statement is not lost on me. “You certainly don’t need any of us to take care of you. But that’s not the point. We want to take care of you. We want to keep you safe. All of us fuckin’ love you and we don’t want anything to happen to you.” I drop my knee and sit up. I didn’t expect this.
“Finn and I were totally
outta line yesterday. And we’re both so fuckin’ sorry for puttin’ you through our shit. It wasn’t fair of us. All you do is make our lives better every day and you deserve the same in return.” I’m shaking my head looking at my bandaged hand, but I don’t realize it. “Don’t shake your head.” I stop and return my gaze to the men at my table.
“Guys, we’re a family. Families have bad days. It’s not that big a deal.” Why are they harping on this? “I love you all too. You guys have never done wrong by me,” I look directly in Kavy’s eyes, “Never!” He drops his head in his hands, that guilt is still there.
“Kid, we’ve gotta come up with a new system with you,” Cally says softly. “We all talked about it and realized we all worry about you being alone. With your cases and now the Butch thing comin’ up, we feel like you’re vulnerable right now.”
“Come on Cally,” I say incredulously. “I’ve had the same job and cases for the last six years. I’m rarely alone, one if not all of you are always around. There’s security around the clock at the office and the house is secured like Fort Knox. I’m not buying what you’re selling boys. You better try a new pitch.” Busted. They’re all scanning each other for who’s going to drop the real story.
Sully clears his throat. “Last night scared me,” he says softly, “scared all of us. None of us could get to you in time. It brought back some tough memories—” I cut him off.
“Don’t.” I’m not doing this and I’m sure as shit not doing it in front of a stranger who has no idea what’s being discussed. It’s not show and tell. “It happened to me, not you four,” my voice is raised, not yelling but pointed. “You boys have issues, that’s on you not me. I’m not doin’ this.” I push back hard from the table to stand up.
“I don’t know what you guys are talkin’ about,” Kel whispers, “but it brought back some shitty memories for me too, Shannon.” He looks up at me with sad eyes. I hunch my shoulders. These men are carrying around baggage that doesn’t belong to them. How do I convince them to let it go?
“What do you guys want?” I ask softly, looking at my bandaged hand. I don’t want to be the reason they’re carrying this weight.
Finn clears his throat, “We want you to agree to not be alone until the Butch trial is done. A lot of nasties are crawlin’ outta the woodwork and you’re a target. Either one of us will be with you at all times or we’ll hire someone to be. It’s up to you how we work this, but we think this is what’s best for right now.” Wow. He’s worried, really worried. What the fuck is going on that I don’t know?
“Is it really that bad or are you guys being overly cautious? Because this is comin’ outta left field for me.”
“I got some information this weekend that changed things. This is necessary, Kid. We aren’t overreacting. I’ll fill you in as much as you want this week, but we need you to decide how we move forward now.” Finn is intense, this isn’t up for discussion.
“You guys can’t be with me all the time. With your case loads,” I glance at my boys, “and you running point on investigations.” I nod at Finn. “And well, I don’t know why you’re here…sorry,” I say to Kel. Everyone’s eyes bug a bit at the last comment. I don’t know why Kel’s here. He doesn’t know me and he’s not responsible for me.
“He’s here because of his connection to Mia and Butch,” Finn explains. “He’s going to be at the hospital a lot and so are you. We figured he could help out.” Kel winces at the explanation but doesn’t comment. I shrug and continue.
“I was already planning on hiring Rodger full time. He did a great job of hiding my cooch last night. So I don’t need a driver. Do you have someone in mind to babysit me?” I’m snarky. I’m not mad at them; they’re trying to keep me safe. Being a thirty-year-old woman and requiring someone to watch me at all times is just sucktastic, and it puts me in a mood.
“I put some feelers out this morning to some people I know. I should know more this afternoon. You can meet them and final decision is yours, but I’m gonna screen them all first,” Finn states.
“Me too,” the peanut gallery chimes in together, Kel included. I laugh. I feel bad for whoever dares to take this job.
“All right, well I’m gonna go enjoy my last moments of freedom then.” Frowns all around. “I need to go to the store if you animals wanna be fed.” I roll my eyes.
“I’ll go with you,” Kel says emphatically. I don’t mind some eye candy.
“’Kay, let’s go.” I get up from the table and make my way toward the door but Cally steps in front of me. He reaches down and grabs me around my waist, pulling me half a foot off the floor. I enfold my arms around his neck and look up at him. He’s smiling so wide his dimples almost look painful.
“Thanks for the refill last night.” He wiggles his Callaghan eyebrows. “You really were the most breathtaking woman on Earth last night.” My heart flutters, whose wouldn’t? I pull my legs up wrapping them around his waist and squeeze him tight to me, nuzzling him into my neck.
“Thanks Cally,” I whisper in his hair and press my lips to the side of his head. He starts nuzzling and wiggling his mouth into my neck and his stubble tickles me. I start to giggle and try to pull away which only intensifies his attack. I let go of his shoulders and try to grab his head and push him off.
“Get a room you two,” I hear Finn chide. I’m laughing and snorting (attractive) at this point and losing my grip around his waist. Cally stops, sets me back on my feet and slaps my ass.
“You know I like an audience, Finn,” Cally shoots back at his brother. I turn and head in my original direction to the garage. I pull off my slippers and slide into some comfy lined boots. Kel is just watching me, leaning on the door frame.
“Ready?” I ask chipper in my tone. Apparently a little tickle does a girl good. If only I could get the poke part of that equation, we’d be good to go.
“Yup,” he pops his p opening the door and lets me lead the way.
Kel whistles long and loud. Uncle Mick’s baby, and now mine, the reason for his attention.
“A 1968 Shelby Cobra GT 500KR.” He’s breathy. My car made him cream his jeans. He’s running his hands along the body, studying every curve like he could go blind at this moment a happy man.
“Do you like my Sunday drivin’ car?” I ask with a feigned southern accent. His head snaps up as I break his molestation of Shelby.
“Your car?” he says, testing how those words taste rolling off his tongue. I arch my brow at him and head to the driver’s side, wiggling my keys.
“Stop staring, Kellerman.” I’m in the driver’s seat and he’s still ogling Shelby. “Get in or I’ll leave your ass behind.” He gently pulls the door open and slides into the seat. He shuts the door and starts eye fucking the interior of Shelby. I open the garage and crank the engine. That sound really is special. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to it. He moans. That sound I could get used to. I snicker and pull out of the garage, heading toward the store. This is a classically restored car, no bells and whistles. Uncle Mick was a purist and I didn’t fuck with that. The AM push button radio still remains on the dash and I never turn it on. I ride in silence in this car every weekend. Cleansing doesn’t begin to describe the effect on me.
“You wanna go on a drive before we hit the store?” I ask. Not knowing if this will be allowed in the coming weeks. I can’t believe I have to get a bodyguard!
“Absolutely,” he coos, “I’ll text Kavanagh and let him know.” I nod. The babysitting has commenced.
“Let the warden know I peed before we left,” I snark at him. He doesn’t respond as he finishes his text and puts his phone back in his pocket.
“I know this is shitty, Kid,” he says matter-of-factly. He called me Kid, only my family calls me that. I like it coming off his lips. I like it more than I should in fact. “Everyone just wants you safe. I want you safe. That’s why I was there today…not the reason Finn gave you.” He doesn’t look at me. He just shakes his head a little and stares out the window.
I head north like I usually do. I like the drive up to Weston. It’s a small town perched up in the hills. The roads and highways leading to it are rolling and winding, perfect for a drive. We ride in companionable silence. I decide to take the scenic route up K-5. It’ll take longer, but like I said this could be the last of these for a while. I’m going to take advantage. It’s the perfect autumn day, crisp cool weather and a bright sunny cloud dotted sky overhead. The trees have all turned amber, golden, rust, and brown. It’s like driving through Keats’ To Autumn, peaceful and calm. I want some apple cider.
“You like apple cider?” I ask Kel.
He looks over at me with a sweet smile. “Love it.”
I pull into the Red Barn Farm in Weston. I love this place. Uncle Mick used to bring me here to pick apples and pumpkins every autumn. We’d do hayrides and visit the animals, then Uncle Mick would always buy me apple cider, I miss that. I haven’t been back here since I left home the first time.
We hop out of the car and head into the country store. Kel buys us an apple cider each and we walk around sipping in silence for a while, enjoying the gorgeous weather and squealing kids running around.
“Dad brought me here once when I was little I think,” Kel finally breaks the silence. “It’s the perfect weather to be here. Thanks for lettin’ me tag along.”
“No problem,” I grin at him. Like I had a choice. It’s nice to have him here though.
My BlackBerry starts ringing. It’s my warden.
“Yes sir, Warden,” I answer.
“Knock it off, Kid,” he laughs. “We’re all talkin’ about going to The Corner Café for lunch. You and Kellerman wanna meet us?”
“Hang on.”
Blackness Takes Over & Blackness Awaits Page 11
