“That’s… great, Hunter,” I said. What did that mean exactly? I wondered.
“Yeah. I’ll be moving to St. Louis permanently tomorrow and doing a lot of traveling,” he said with his back to me.
“Wait. What?” I asked.
“I’ll be taking over most of the business. My dad wants to phase himself out of the movie theater business. He’s busy enough with the farm and the church as it is. He asked me tonight if I would consider taking over.”
My mind was spinning. Hunter would be gone from Salem on a permanent basis. I sucked in a sharp breath. It hurt even more when things worked out like I hoped they would. With Hunter gone, it would make things easier on me when people found out I was pregnant, easier to keep it from him, and easier to pretend I knew what I was doing. Still, to hear him say he was going to be gone permanently hurt me on a level I didn’t realize was possible.
“I don’t know what to say,” I answered truthfully. “I never thought you’d leave Salem.”
Hunter turned and smiled sadly. “Neither did I.”
“So, this is goodbye for now then?” I asked, suddenly unsure of everything I’d been so sure of a few hours before.
“This is goodbye,” he confirmed.
I walked over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. His eyes closed as I reached up to kiss him on the cheek. “I wish you the best, Hunter,” I whispered.
He took a deep, shuddering breath and pulled me to him in an embrace. “And I wish the same for you too, Jen,” he whispered back. He pulled back and walked away from me without looking back. I locked up behind him and got everything ready for the rest of my week at the inn.
Planning and organizing kept my busy.
Keeping busy kept my mind off everything I didn’t want to think about.
And that was all I could handle right then.
“To be honest, I have no idea how you’ve kept that a secret as long as you have,” Beth said, motioning to my rounded tummy.
I turned this way and that, looking at myself in the mirror. “Well, it’s cold out now, so I’ve gotten away with it by layering, wearing a sweater over my clothing, and avoiding going out of the house unless it’s absolutely necessary,” I said, running a hand over my stomach and the long-sleeved dress I wore. It was soft, comfortable, and it accentuated the one thing I’d been hiding for the past three months—my big, ‘ole baby bump. I was just sick and tired of it. Here I was a few weeks away from my final trimester and I hadn’t had any tummy pictures taken, I hadn’t bought any pretty maternity clothing, and I hadn’t enjoyed a single moment of my pregnancy journey… all because I didn’t want people to start talking.
“Well, they ain’t gonna misunderstand what that dress is trying to display,” she said with a wide smile. “Are you sure you’re ready to just let it all hang out there though?” Beth asked, eyeing me up and down.
I looked over at the stack of clothes we’d already tried on and the things I’d fallen in love with and was planning to buy. I put a hand out on my tummy when I felt a little kick. Baby Jedi was happy with the dress. I’d been working my rear end off for over three months since opening the Countryside Inn and Bakery, all while keeping my pregnancy a secret. It was exhausting and by god, I wanted to be able to waltz into the Piggly Wiggly in my pajama bottoms and maternity tee and purchase a jar of pickles and a container of ice cream without giving a hoot who saw me. Yeah, I was over it.
“Oh yeah, I’m ready,” I answered. “I’m ready to really begin enjoying this pregnancy before it’s all over, and I realize that I was so busy worrying about people’s opinions that I missed the entire experience.” I set my jaw and watched Beth in the mirror.
“Well, it’s about friggin’ time!” she squealed. “Get that dress. You look fabulously pregnant in it.” She jumped out of the chair she was sitting in and left.
“Where are you going?” I shouted.
“I’m going shopping for my niece finally!” she shouted back.
I went into the dressing room to change with a huge smile on my face. We were about to do some major damage in this mall.
“Beth, seriously, what are you going to do if it’s a boy?” I asked, eyeing the pile of pink baby clothes piled up on my bed. Beth snorted and held up another little outfit for me to fall in love with.
“Only a little girl would be so stubborn as to not even let us get a good look-see and keep us in suspense all this time,” she shot out.
Okay, I had to admit that was pretty good reasoning, but I suspected it was really just a lot of hot air so she could buy what she wanted. Auntie Beth had her heart set on a little girl to spoil rotten. Beth began folding the onesies and blankets and every other little thing she’d bought the baby, putting it all in the tall chest of drawers we’d bought a few weeks back. I sat on the sofa and glanced over at the bassinet. It still needed a fresh coat of paint. I guess I needed to carry it downstairs soon and get that done.
“So, what are you going to tell Matt when he asks you if you knew I was pregnant this whole time and if you know who the father is?” I asked after a moment. It had been on my mind since I’d made the decision to stop trying to hide my pregnancy.
Beth shrugged. “The truth,” she said simply. “That of course I knew the whole time, but that I made you a promise not to tell anyone who the father is.”
I sighed. “I’m really sorry about this, Beth,” I said again.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Jen,” Beth answered immediately. “You have the right to keep it to yourself. I may not like it and think you’re gonna regret it, but that doesn’t mean I can’t support you and your decision.”
I smiled at my best friend, nearly buried in a pile of tiny, pink clothes. “Well, after tomorrow, we won’t have to worry about keeping it all a secret any longer. Everyone in Salem, hell, probably half the state will know I’m pregnant,” I answered wryly.
“Yeah, about that….” Beth began. “You think this is the best idea you’ve ever had? I mean, deciding to let the cat out of the bag is one thing… but letting the cat out at church?” Beth raised a brow.
I huffed and rearranged myself on the sofa to get more comfortable. “I want it all out there and quickly, with no way I’ll be able to doubt that everyone knows,” I answered. “You know of any other place as good as a church for spreading gossip that quickly and effectively?” I asked.
Beth shrugged. “I suppose you’re right,” she admitted.
I smiled. “I know I’m right.”
“Okay, if the is how you want to announce to the world that you’re expecting then… I’m in,” Beth said.
“You ready?” Beth asked me as we sat in the parking lot of New Hope Community Church. I’d been attending Pastor Wright’s church since Beth started going on occasion with Matt. I taught Sunday school every other Sunday and helped with a lot of the children’s ministries. This Sunday, I wasn’t teaching my little kindergarteners; it was my week off in the rotation. I took a deep breath and nodded. It was now or never, and I was ready to put this behind me already.
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” I said with a shrug. We got out of my car and headed for the church together. When we entered, we both took of our jackets. Taking a deep, fortifying breath, I hung my jacket over my arm that carried my Bible. I followed Beth into the church where most of the adult congregation was gathered and fellowshipping before services would start a few minutes later.
“Jen!” I heard a familiar voice call from a few feet away. “I was just telling…” McKenna’s voice trailed off when she saw all of me. My dress was a knee length, wine-colored sweater dress with a pretty, draping neckline. It also had little pleats stitched in just above my baby bump, meant to really highlight a pregnant tummy. And man, did it. It was adorable, soft, and comfortable though, so I’d chosen to wear it to church that morning for the exact effect it was having on several ladies as their eyes rounded when they realized what they were looking at. And boom goes the dynamite. McKenna Jacobs… the biggest gossip in three coun
ties, possibly more. Just the person I needed to see. I clenched my jaw and stepped forward.
“McKenna,” I gushed, reaching in for a little hugs as usual, like nothing was different. I placed a hand on the top of my stomach as I spoke. “I was hopin’ I’d get a chance to talk to you before services.” Her eyes hadn’t left my stomach.
“Jen… when did…?”
I cut her off immediately. “I have those classroom cutouts for you that I promised to bring with me.” I put a hand out and patted her arm. “Don’t forget to get them from my car after church, hun,” I said quickly with a huge smile.
“Beth.” Matt waved as he walked up to us. His smile faltered once he realized there was some tension in the room.
“What’s going…?” His voice trailed off as he reached Beth’s side. His eyes widened as he saw my hand resting on my belly and all the women standing around gaping like he was just then. Beth elbowed him in the side, never breaking her smile. An oomph left his mouth as he rubbed his side, looking completely flabbergasted.
“Well, we better take our seats,” Beth said with a huge, sugary-sweet voice. She tucked her arm in mine and turned me away from the group.
“She just doesn’t know how to take it easy, ya know?” Beth whispered over her shoulder. “I keep telling her she’s got to sit down and rest every once in a while. It takes a lot out of you, growing a baby and all that… Or so I’ve heard,” Beth said with a grin.
“Just think, Matt,” Beth said loudly as we headed toward the pew where the Wright family usually sat. “We’ll be able to spoil this baby like it is our own… maybe we can hold off trying for one after all,” she added in a mock-whisper. Matt looked so lost that I actually felt bad for the poor guy. Beth had just confirmed I was pregnant in front of the whole church, showed her support and Matt’s, and managed to start another small thread of gossip that she was anxious for her own baby. That was going to take a teensy bit of the spotlight off my own scandal. Beth was freaking amazing!
“We’re going to be talking about this later, right?” Matt whispered into Beth’s ear as we sat.
I cringed. Poor Beth. Beth just patted his hand in answer and snuggled into his side until the class started. I had no doubt that by the time church was over that Salem would be abuzz with the news. Shrinking down into my seat, I frowned. A tiny little nudge from Mini Jedi brought a smile to my lips though. For the first time, I was able to lay a hand on my stomach without worrying about anyone seeing me. By the time Sunday school was over, I was grinning ear to ear. It didn’t take long for that to change though.
In between Sunday school and church services, I decided to hurry to the restroom. The baby seemed to press on my bladder in the worst way when I was seated. Eyes followed me as I walked, whispers did too, but I didn’t care… not too much, anyway. I was washing my hands when a voice broke up the happy thoughts I was having.
“Jennifer Collins.”
I cringed and turned to the sound of the most annoying voice on the face of the planet. Jill Mason and her super nasally, southern drawl scraped against my eardrums.
I grabbed a few paper towels and began drying off my hands. “Jill,” I acknowledged. Jill had been the bane of my existence in school. Not even Beth knew of the lengths Jill had gone to in order to make my life miserable. I thought she might have changed once we were all adults, but if anything, she became worse. No, she didn’t bully me anymore, but she didn’t waste an opportunity to be nasty either. Looked like today wasn’t going to be any different.
“Look who done went and got herself knocked up,” Jill said as she turned on the water in the sink next to me. “Goody-two-shoes Jen Collins.” She sneered at me. A few other ladies were in the restroom, some clearly finished, but they were hanging back to hear the gossip, to hear what I might have to say. I wasn’t going to give any of them the satisfaction though. I smiled as wide as I could without pulling a muscle in my cheek.
“Well, bless your little heart for noticing, hun,” I gushed, rubbing a hand over my baby bump. “Everyone keeps sayin’ I’m so tiny that they hardly realized I was pregnant.” Jill had never been pregnant before that anyone knew of, but it was a known fact that people regularly asked her if she was expecting, only to find out quite embarrassingly that she just had added quite a bit of pudge around her middle section since high school. Her face turned a mottled red sort of color as I continued on as if I were oblivious.
“I keep thinkin’ I need to wear a sign or somethin’ to announce I’m carrying this precious cargo around every day,” I said sweetly. “Thank you so much for making me feel better about my tiny baby bump,” I added in for good measure. By then, Jill looked like she was ready to blow a gasket. I took a step back, ready to make my exit and let my face cool off before the main church service started.
“Why, Jen, look at you!” came a sweet voice from behind us all. I twirled around in mortification. Mrs. Wright, the pastor’s wife and Hunter’s mother, stood there. She must have been in one of the stalls. She had to have heard everything. I could feel a blush working its way up my neck and across my cheekbones. Jill Mason grinned like she was the cat who ate the canary—smug and self-satisfied.
“Mrs. Wright…” I began.
“How did I not know you were expectin’ a little blessing?” she asked with a bright smile as she washed her hands.
I tried to find words, but they just wouldn’t come out.
She dried her hands off quickly and came over to me. “May I?” she asked.
I nodded, unable to even think straight. She placed a hand on my stomach and smiled at everyone in the ladies room.
“Babies are such a joy in a woman’s life, don’t y’all agree?” she asked, her voice dripping honey. All the women smiled and nodded. The baby decided just at that moment to bump into Mrs. Wright’s hand. She smiled even wider and rubbed her hand lightly over my stomach.
“That’s right, sweetie, Mrs. Wright is here to spoil you rotten to the core,” she cooed at my stomach. The baby rewarded her with another small kick and Mrs. Wright laughed, encouraging them to feel the baby moving all about in there. By the time we walked out of the ladies room, Jill had slunk off somewhere and I had been promised by a couple of women that they’d go through their old baby stuff and bring by all the things they had for me to see if I wanted any of it. Mrs. Wright never left my side, gushing over my “cute little baby bump” and the “precious little angel” I was expecting to everyone as we made our way back to our seats. Mrs. Wright had a way with people. They loved her, they looked up to her, and a lot of them wouldn’t have dared disrespect her enough to say anything against me or the baby when she was singin’ our praises. At least, not to her face.
“Jennifer Collins, you’re lucky I don’t tan your hide for not letting me know you’re expectin’,” she whispered fiercely as we took our seats on the pew.
I swallowed and nodded. “Yes, ma’am,” I murmured. “I’m sorry… I just didn’t know how to tell everyone. I wasn’t ashamed… just overwhelmed and confused,” I answered.
“All this time, you’ve been working all hours of the day at your new inn and all that baking you’ve been doin’…” Uh-oh… she wasn’t happy. “I could’ve been helping you.”
“I’ve been doing okay,” I said softly.
She snorted. “You’ve been doin’ better than okay… I know you’ve been running out of baked good halfway through the day and havin’ to bake a whole second batch just to keep up with demand. I know you’ve been gettin’ requests for catering jobs as far out as Dent County.”
My mouth popped open in a little O. “How did you…?” Beth. Of course, Beth had told her how well I’d been doing… and how much work I’d been puttin’ in. Truth was, I was exhausted. Between the baking, the catering orders, and the inn itself, I was wearing myself thin.
“The point is, young lady, you’ve got a lot on your plate. You need some help whether you want to admit it or not. That baby will be here sooner than you think. And just
imagine trying to do all you’ve been doing lately when you’re as big as a house and can’t even bend over to pick up something you’ve dropped.” Mrs. Wright harrumphed when she saw the look on my face.
She patted my knee and smiled. “Don’t worry. We’ll talk after church,” she said.
Pastor Wright walked up to the podium just then, asking us all to stand and join him in song. Mrs. Wright handed me a hymnal and carried on like any other Sunday morning.
“So, what do you think?” I asked, eyeing the girl as she glanced around the tiny room. We’d already toured the house and the kitchen. We were sitting at the small table in the bakery talking. I fingered the application she’d filled out. She smiled shyly.
“Are you sure you want me?” she asked. “Outside of babysitting and cleaning my own house, I don’t have a lot of experience. I mean, I’m not tryin’ to talk you out of hiring me or anything, but I don’t want to disappoint you either, Miss Collins,” she said.
I smiled at her. If I had any doubts at all, she’d just have obliterated them. Out of the handful of applicants that answered the part-time ad job I’d placed, Rachael was by far the best choice. She was shy and didn’t have a whole lot of self-confidence, but she was sweet, well-mannered, and I could tell we’d get along just fine. Plus, she did have babysitting experience, and I’d already told her that would eventually come in handy.
“I’m sure, Rachael,” I said with a small smile. “And please, call me Jen.”
Rachael smiled, took the hand I offered, and shook it.
“So, after school each day?” I asked.
“Yes, ma’am,” she answered. “I’ll be here just as quick as I can each day and whenever you need me on weekends, I’ll be available,” she offered with a grin. I smiled and stood. She followed me over to the counter where I put a jumbo chocolate chip muffin in a bag and handed it to her. She looked surprised.
“There’s a lot of perks to working here,” I said with a grin and a wink.
Perfect Contradiction Page 7
