by Jill Cooper
He or she is actively blocking my abilities.
I can even make out their silhouette in the dark, but I can’t see the person’s face. It’s the shape of a man, tall with broad shoulders. He’s different from Rex. And the same, all the same. From how he moves and tilts his head to the side.
If he’s coming for me, I need to move. I have to find Lara and get her back. I haven’t moved through the timelines like she has, but someone has to bring her back. She’s the one who always has the answers and I need her, now more than ever.
I open the door and check the hallway. When the coast is clear of nurses, I run down the hall. There are so many doors on all sides that I’m not sure where to turn or where to go. Voices come toward me from the other end of the hall. I’ll be caught and can’t risk such a thing so I open the door to the janitor’s closet and slip inside.
Inside smells like bleach and peroxide, a combination that makes my mind swirl. I peer out as a nurse and doctor walk by. I close the door gently, so they won’t see me. I gasp as the wall in front of me disappears and I’m staring at the stars, drifting through time and space.
“She barely holds on now.” It’s Rex and he’s talking to Patricia as if I’m not even in the room.
That’s when I realize I’m not. I’m adrift, floating from timeline to timeline, but which one is real?
Which one is mine?
“Her mind fractures and it’ll give us everything we need to cement these changes and make them permanent.”
“Good,” Patricia says. “Because being dead or in jail aren’t acceptable situations for me. How long do we have to nail this down?”
They gaze down at my unconscious body, strapped down to a hospital bed.
“A matter of days. Soon the timeline will stop trying to fix itself. It’ll stop with the reminders of Lara and she’ll be trapped where we sent her. We just have to give our new friend a little more time. If Molly wakes up and begins to talk, this could all be over.”
“She won’t.” Patricia turns and stares right at me. “Will she?”
I scream and fling myself backward against the storage bins of cleaning chemicals, mops, and rags. My heart pounds, races along, and whatever images I had just seen fade away. I’m staring at a simple janitor’s closet again. There’s a tile floor and a wall.
There’s no space or stars. There’s no black abyss.
What’s happening? Is it from what Rex had injected me with? Or is it something more sinister? Maybe they’re right and my mind is fracturing. I keep the timeline pure. I sense when things are wrong and when they aren’t. Except, right now, I’m not sure which event belongs where. I’m useless.
There’s no answers to my questions so I press on. I run down the hall and slip inside the elevator. I push the button for the lobby, my heart thudding. Exiting the building unseen is a long shot, but if I can get clear, I can find somewhere to hide. I can make Cassidy believe me.
In the lobby, I make a quick sprint for the front door. I bow my head as I walk by the reception desk and tuck my hair behind my ears. The woman at the desk leaps to her feet and points at me. “Stop her! She’s not supposed to get out of here.”
Great.
I charge for the door, pumping my arms, and run for it. I take a page out of my big sister’s playbook and slide beneath the legs of several guards. I slam into the revolving doors, and then I’m on the other side and hailing a taxi before anyone can reach me
“Taxi!” I scream and when I reach for the door I slam into a wall. I’m suddenly back inside the hospital even though I was just outside.
My noses crunches against the wall and I’m splayed onto my back. My head spins and I stare up at the hallway as people approach me. I had been clear of this place, I know I had. So, what had happened? Who had brought me back here?
“Sorry, everyone. New medicine isn’t working, but we’ll find the right combination for her soon.” Rex struggles to get me up to my feet because I won’t help him. I push against his arm, desperate to get away. His grip tightens on me until he pinches my skin.
“If you insist on playing it this way, Molly, I can make your life very uncomfortable.”
“Get her back into her bed before everything we’ve worked for goes up in smoke.” Patricia races down the hall toward us. “I have my own problems to deal with. This one is yours.”
“Yes, Patricia.” Rex strains to keep his voice calm as she hurries past. He gazes at me with malice. “Come to your room quietly and I’ll see you get some extra jello with dinner tonight.”
“No!” I scream and scamper away. When I get to the elevator door, I’m free and in the clear. It’s almost as though he’s let me go. I don’t have time to think why I’m back in the hospital when I just almost been in a taxi a few short minutes ago.
I stab my finger on the down button. Behind me, Rex inches closer, a dastardly smirk upon his face.
“Molly, be careful of your health.” Rex’s voice comes from the intersecting hallway and I spin around and stare at another version of Rex coming…
And another…
No wonder the timeline has been so screwy. Rex is borrowing other versions of himself to manipulate time. I struggle to breathe as all these new Rex memories flood into my mind. I’m running through my house, I’m only a year younger than I am now, and I’m searching for something.
“Mike! Mike!”
I can’t find him anywhere, but as I burst outside, he’s there. He’s sitting across the street and staring down at his shadow. His face is drawn, despondent, as Rex sits beside him, whispering into his ear.
No! Is that why Mike has changed and grown so sullen? Is this the new friend he’s always talking about?
I scream as the elevator door opens and I scamper forward only to be met with a pair of men’s loafers. Slowly I gaze up into a face of a man older than me by five years—the timeline memories make it easy to place. I recognize his brown hair—it has a slight wave to it—and his soft brown eyes.
It’s Mike. A version of Mike who is older than me. But I recognize him and the soft way he holds his lips in a smirk, has only ever meant for me.
He bends down and cups my chin as I sob. The memories he has and the intense emotions of hatred and rage coming from him, can’t be his. He can’t hate me, can he?
“Oh, my sweet Molly. How I’ve loved you. How I’ve missed you.” Mike smiles at me, but then his lips twist and his expression turns to malice. “I’ve been so looking forward to this day, I can’t even begin to tell you.”
His words just make me sob harder. His voice has changed and he almost sounds like Rex. He’s cruel and twisted and not like my beloved twin at all. He doesn’t just want to hurt me, he wants to destroy me. “What did Rex do to you?”
“He freed me.” Mike smiles. “Just like I am now going to free you.”
Chapter Seventeen: Cassidy Winters
In the morning, Don and I enjoy toasted bagels and strong coffee that would make espresso jealous, but I’m distracted. He’d spoken Lara’s name several times through the night and with my meeting with Miranda coming up in a few short hours, I can’t think straight.
In the executive-style kitchen, I rinse my coffee mug and stash it into the stainless-steel dishwasher. The rolled-up newspaper on the counter catches my attention and I unfold it. My breath is taken away from the headline as I read it.
Senator O’Reily’s car had crashed into a ditch and he’s missing. While no foul play is suspected, my mouth tastes metallic and foul. My heart speeds up as Don enters the kitchen. “You ready to go?”
I pick up the paper and struggle to speak. I point at the headline. “Is this what you meant when you said he won’t be bothering Rewind anymore?”
Donovan’s eyes tick back and forth. He scowls as he takes the paper from me and reads it a few seconds longer than he needs to. “Of course, not.” He places the paper back down on the counter. “I came to an agreement with Marcus. I wouldn’t resort to hurting him, Cass.”
“Not even if you’re mother asked?”
He crosses his arms and stares me down. “She was a little terse with you yesterday…”
“That’s not what this is about.” I take a deep breath and try to remember that not everything is a conspiracy. Not everything is as bad as I think it is, but a coincidence that big?
“How could you think that of me?” Don’s voice softens as he rubs my arms. “I want things to be simple, easy, sure. But I wouldn’t hurt a senator, or anyone else.”
I’m not sure but a moment later, Don strokes my chin and lowers his face down to mine. He smells of a combination of cologne and mint toothpaste. “C’mon, who’s my girl, Cass?”
“I am,” I whisper and kiss him as if he’s placed a trance over me. Maybe love is just like that, but inside, parts of me scream.
“And I’ll take care of you. I promise.”
****
I smile and say all the right things, but as we arrive at the Rewind Headquarters at the old Prudential Tower, Donovan keeps me close. “Something wrong? You seem worried about something?”
Shaking my head, I scrunch up my nose—he thinks it’s cute when I do that. “Just anxious to get the day started. The wedding is weighing on my mind. DJs, flowers. It’s only a few weeks away, you know.”
We step onto the escalator together and get ready to go through security. I keep my badge ready for scanning. “I told you we could hire a wedding planner for all that.” His voice teeters on the brink of a sharp edge. Annoyed that I haven’t gone along with his plan?
“And I like to do things myself.” Quietly, I answer.
Donovan sighs as he scans his badge through security. “Fair enough,” his answers sounds more like a sigh than not.
“Trust me, it’ll be fine.”
“I just hate for that little blond head of yours to be stressed out.” Donovan fluffs the top of my hair, something that has always annoyed me, but I let it slide. We come to a fork in the hall where he’ll turn and I’ll continue straight. “Lunch?”
I start to nod, then shake my head. “Right. I would, but I’m meeting an old friend for lunch across town for a few minutes. Catchup from college.”
“College, eh?” Donovan runs his tongue along his teeth and puts his hands in his pockets. “If you’re sure there’s nothing wrong, I guess that’s okay.”
“Of course. I’ll see you tonight.” I lean in and kiss his cheek.
Donovan heads down the hall, but he gives me a glance over his shoulder. I sigh with nerves, more anxious about the exchange than I should be. When I turn I nearly bump into Thomas.
“Thomas,” my eyes widen with surprise, “I didn’t know you’d be at headquarters this morning.”
“Ms. James wanted to speak with me.” He shakes his head as if he’s trying to clear the experience from his mind.
“About?” I pry when I probably shouldn’t.
He waves me off. “Nothing that concerns you. Hey, you get your paperwork in time to her like you were supposed to?”
“I did. Still our secret, right?” I lean in with a playful smile, crossing my arms to do my best to appear flirty.
“Always. We have to stick together!” He raises his hand and I give it an appropriately hard high five.
“I’m having a box of those special candy donuts you like so much sent to the east wing for tonight.” I wink.
Thomas chortles as he heads down to the escalator. I step up to the elevator with a long sigh. One more bullet dodged, but how long can I keep it up?
****
There’s no sign of Patricia through the morning and I accept the fact she must be tied up in meetings. I go through my day as usual, doing the job best I can, but my mind focuses on my upcoming meeting with Miranda and Test Subject One in the east wing.
When I think of Molly, my stomach ties into knots. I want to visit her and see if she’s all right. It’s not so much that I want to, it’s that I need to.
But not yet. First, my meeting with Miranda.
Before I head to lunch, I give instructions to my security crew. The rest of my day will be in the east wing like it always is, and I make sure everything at headquarters is as it should be. “Everything is running smooth, Ms. Winters.” Tony smiles at me. “Go enjoy your lunch.”
“Thanks.” I grab my purse, apprehension making my stomach harden. There’s still time to change my mind, to not have this secret meeting with Miranda Crane. I could pretend we had never talked, I could go to Patricia.
But I can’t. That’d be wrong. Whatever I find out, I’ll deal with it as I always have.
I take the subway away from the Back Bay and over to Cambridge, switching from the orange line to the red line. The walls of the underground station have advertisements for Rewind on their walls.
Ready to relive the past? Visit Rewind Today and sign up for a frequent travelers’ program!
Store your favorite memories so you can relive them. There’s no time like the present to preserve your past!
The ads are made up of smiling families and children, and they don’t mention the illegal experiments or how the memory storage system is actually looking for new candidates for the memory deletion and implantation program.
I’m part of that and it sickens me.
On the red line, I’m a few minutes away from meeting Miranda and I try to center myself. I scroll through the news on my phone and when I come to an article about the restoration of the old St. George church on Liberty Street, I pause. Something about it seems familiar.
Not right.
A light blinds me from inside my own head and the pain ratchets up fast. I groan, almost dropping my phone, and then I grab the steel pole in front of me. My mind surges with a memory. I’m standing in the back of a church in a long navy gown and I’m holding hands with a beautiful woman in a wedding gown.
“No one is ever going to buy this.” My lips twist, my wry smirk reflected in the full-length mirror in front of me.
“You’re a cousin visiting from out of town. What’s not to buy?”
“How about all of it?” I gaze behind us and see the young girl Molly. She stands beside us and Lara pulls her hair off her neck to slip a locket on her. It’s heart shaped and inside is a picture of us.
Lara smiles at me. “We’re family. Nothing will ever tear us apart again.”
Family.
I moan as the memory fades and I’m back to sitting on the T. The pain slowly recedes but I’m left in shock with what had just happened. In the memory, I know Lara, I know Molly and we are family.
How?
There’s a splatter of blood on my phone. I wipe my nose with the back of my hand and stand up. My legs feel like jelly and for the first time I realize people across the way are staring at me. I clear my throat and as I approach the opening door, a woman slides away, clutching her purse.
“It’s drugs, right?” the old lady cackles at me.
I consider telling her off, but instead I just shake my head and exit the train. I’m looking forward to my lunch with Miranda even more now.
But, I’m afraid I won’t like what I hear. I’m afraid it could tear my whole world apart.
Chapter Eighteen: Cassidy Winters
By the time I arrive at the sandwich shop at Union Station, I’ve shaken off my experience on the train, labeling it as a strange anxiety episode. I sit on a bar-stool looking off at the street as I sip bitter, hot coffee. Outside, steam rises from the street grates and people rush to the subway platform.
All walks of life from proper women running in heels, to men with long dreds and hardly a care in the world.
By the time Miranda slips onto the stool beside me, I’ve eaten half a sandwich and can’t stomach any more of my tuna melt. She bounces with nerves as she slides her briefcase onto the counter top, and only a moment later she places her order with the acne-speckled waitress. A young teen working at this time of day? Makes me wonder what her story is.
“You’re early,” she say
s.
“I like to get the lay of the land. I was beginning to think you wouldn’t show.”
“If I had any sense I wouldn’t,” Miranda mutters as she sips her coffee. She licks her lips and I study her from the corner of my eye. The way she bounces, her fingers drumming on the countertop sets my police senses off.
She’s guilty of something. And dying to get it off her chest.
Even if she hadn’t caught me going through her office, Miranda would’ve cracked eventually. I’m not sure how to start the conversation, but words jump out of her mouth without any prodding from me.
“Ten years ago, Patricia started asking me to falsify information to Congress about what we were doing with the memories. How we were looking for candidates. It flew in the face of what we were supposed to be doing. She was using money from dirty places.”
“Mob?”
Miranda nods. “They were in a hurry to get results. Big results. They wanted time travel pushed to extremes. To the point where we started offering money to Vets, anyone with trauma. We found people with trauma or brain injuries were better candidates. We still don’t know why.”
“Okay. What does this have to do with your daughter?”
“I wanted to walk away. John found out I was having an affair.” Miranda swallows hard and tears spring to her eyes. “Jax Montgomery was his name. He worked at Rewind at the time. John was going to leave me so I promised I’d get away. We could start somewhere fresh. I didn’t want to lose my family. So, I sent in my resignation letter and Patricia was furious.” Her words come fast.
“What did she do? Did she threaten you?”
Miranda nods hurriedly. “She said she’d turn me in. She’d convince everyone that it was me, that she never knew. So, I started making tapes. I recorded everything I was doing. Meanwhile John and I planned to take Lara…at night when it was dark, so Patricia’s men wouldn’t see the moving vans. I hoped she wouldn’t find out until it was too late.”
“What happened to Lara?” I ask gently, putting my hand on hers.
She swallows, visibly and her eyes grow distant. Miranda isn’t with me anymore. Instead, she’s trapped in her own trauma and I make her relive it—the curse of all cops. It’s what we do and what we get paid to do, but I have to hear what happened to her daughter.
