by Harper Wylde
“No, sweetheart. He’s not.” Damien said gently. I swear that something broke at that moment because a giggle burst out of me followed by peals of laughter.
My outburst silenced the rest of the room, and I couldn’t contain myself as I laughed hysterically. He wasn’t my fucking father. All those years and I didn’t even belong to him. There was not a piece of him inside me—not one broken, evil, little, tiny bit of his DNA hidden deep inside of me, waiting to come out. What. The. Fuck. It was ridiculous; and sad, and I was pissed as fuck. I was devastated and relieved. I was broken. I didn’t know how to react, so I laughed until I snorted. Looking around the room, I noticed the guys were all on the edge of their seats as they watched me, unsure of how to move forward. Even Damien looked pained at whatever he was picking up off of me.
My stomach hurt as I laughed. I clutched it as tears filled my eyes, and suddenly I was sobbing in between laughs.
“Guys, I think we broke Nix. She’s losing it.” Ryder sounded concerned. I pushed off from the table and walked a few feet away while I wiped the tears with my fingertips, trying to control the sobs and giggles that quickly transitioned to hiccups. Taking a deep breath, I turned towards them. What a sight I was sure I made. My eyes would be puffy and red from all the emotion leaking out of me.
“Why?” The word was breathy and sad.
Damien must have understood because he answered me while everyone else tried to catch my meaning. “Phoenix have strong and desirable powers. He wanted the blood of your Phoenix.”
“He wanted… blood?” I cringed. It sounded fucked up, just like Michael. My frustration at myself built as I tried to wrap my head around everything. I felt like I should know what value phoenix blood held, and I resolved in that moment to learn everything I could about her. She was as much a part of me as I was, and I needed to take control of my own life. I had no excuse. I loved research, hell, I had spent years searching for answers, but I hadn’t set aside any time to keep looking for answers since classes started. What I had researched the day after I found out I was a phoenix had been about shifters in general, nothing specific to my alternate form. I’d have to ask Theo to get me everything he had relating to phoenix, but right now my education needed to start with my heritage. Squaring my shoulders, I took a calming breath and faced the guys.
“Ok, I need answers. Why is phoenix blood important?” I was proud of the strength seeping back into my voice.
“We think your Phoenix’s blood can enhance other shifter’s powers. Michael mentioned selling it.” The growl in Killian’s voice matched the unadulterated anger that surged through me. That fucking piece of scum. He deserved a much more potent expletive; I’d work on it. I felt my fingertips heating as my hatred for Michael blazed, and I had to clench my hands into fists to stave off the fire power I knew was building. I didn’t want to scorch their house if I lost control.
“That’s why he kept you. He’s been waiting for you to shift so he could bleed you dry and sell your fucking blood.” The menace in his voice scared me a little, but I appreciated his anger on my behalf.
“My whole life…” I trailed off as I thought about all the times he had beat me. All the times I had died at his hands. He had been waiting for me to shift, trying to provoke it. All those wasted years when my life could have been something else. I felt the tears building behind my eyes.
“It’s ok to grieve.” Damien walked over to me and slowly reached out, making sure I knew his intentions so I wouldn’t flinch or tense. I sidestepped him. I wasn’t sure I wanted to be touched right now. I wanted to stand on my own two feet. I didn’t want to have to rely on people. “Being fully reliant on people and letting others be there for you when you need them are two separate things. Let us help you. Let us be there for you. We’re all stronger as a family, sweetheart.”
Wrapping my arms around myself, I nodded at him but didn’t move any closer. If he touched me, I might fall apart. I was a roller coaster of feelings as it was, and I needed to be able to finish this conversation and get myself to privacy before I lost control of myself.
“Uh, Nix… your shirt.” The urgency in Ryder’s voice made me look down.
“Oh shit!” I pulled my hands away from myself and fisted them again. I had burned perfect finger sized holes through my hoodie.
Hiro jumped up and placed his hands on my shoulders as he led me to the kitchen. Running cold water, he positioned my hands under the stream of water. “Does this help?”
“I don’t know, you tell me?” He smiled at me.
I laughed and felt the tension release for me in a whoosh. The fire in my fingers died, and I felt more like myself. I wouldn’t let Michael have any more power over me. I was done. He’d had years, and I was going to take my life back. I had when I moved here, and I was doing it again now. No more. I was a fucking Phoenix. These men, Rini, and even her bears were all my family now. I wouldn’t waste tears on Michael or my past anymore.
Seven
Theo
The fire in her eyes when she returned to the dining room made me proud. We had all been bloody worried that she would freak out at the news. I hadn’t known what to expect when we started this conversation with her, but her laughter hadn’t been it. Still, there she was, ready to take on the world and win.
“Theo… I want to know about the markers or my heritage or whatever it is you know. Tell me everything.”
Picking up my glasses, I slid them onto my nose as I retrieved the file I had in my laptop bag sitting next to my chair.
Nix came to stand behind me, leaning over my shoulder to see the paper. I knew this wasn’t the time to notice such things, but she smelled amazing. A mixture of soap—a sweet, fruity smell that was all girl—and the wonderful aroma of bonfires in the fall. I couldn’t get enough of her, and I had to clear my throat and focus past her to get the words out.
“You obviously have all the markers of a phoenix. I was able to identify your avian markers, which explains your alternate form. There aren’t many Egyptian bird shifters—the benu, it’s a relative of the phoenix, and, if you stretch a little, the griffin. Since we’ve seen you shift, we already knew your alternate form. We assume your mother was a full-blooded phoenix shifter from what you’ve told us.”
“She looked like me, from what I remember.” Her voice was soft as she spoke near my ear. I could feel her breath caressing my cheek as she looked at the paper in my hands.
“Your Phoenix could have been primarily Greek or Egyptian, but the markers show your roots are from Egypt, which explains your beautiful long, black hair and deep brown eyes.” I turned into her slightly, my nose grazing her cheek before I quickly turned back to the report.
“So you’ve confirmed I’m of Egyptian descent?” The awe in her voice made me smile.
“It explains all that golden skin,” Hiro spoke up from across the table, looking at Nix with heat in his eyes. Damn him, couldn’t he see that Nix and I were having a moment here? Did he have to pipe in?
He chuckled in my head. Yes.
I narrowed my eyes at him while I spoke to Damien telepathically. Damn it, Damien.
Share nice, boys. His amusement came through the line crystal clear.
“And my… father?” She nearly choked as she said the word. Poor girl. I knew this was all a lot to take on. Damien had been trying to get a read on her, but her walls were flying up and down like crazy during the whole conversation. We were getting jumbled pieces in the process. I’m sure that’s what she was feeling. Confused and raw. She had every right to cry, to rage, to mourn the terrible childhood she’d had.
“Your biological father is a little tougher for me to figure out. There are avian markers there as well, which led me to believe your father was also an avian shifter. Unfortunately, I’m having trouble narrowing down which kind and there are extra markers that I’m not familiar with. I’ll continue working to categorizing them, Nix, and get you more answers.”
“But I don’t have his form or his pow
ers?”
“No. Only those of the phoenix, although we think you have much more power than what has manifested thus far. Your power pours off of you…”
What I left unsaid was that her power called to mine. I felt my Kraken stir under my skin in agreement. It was a constant battle to tame him, to keep him from scaring her with his intensity.
“Thank you, Theo.” She turned and placed a light kiss on my cheek, stunning me. Her skin grazed mine as she stood and started pacing.
“How did Michael have me?” It seemed like she was talking more to herself, but Killian growled. He was having a hard time containing his outrage at the man who had escaped our grasp, and he was beating himself up for missing out on the chance to put the man in the ground. I, personally, wanted to see him paraded in front of the Council for his crimes. I wanted to watch him sweat as they doled out his punishment. It might not be as instantly satisfying as burying the guy six feet under like Killian wanted, but it would be sweet justice to see the panel of powerful shifters bring the man to his knees. No, they would not be pleased that he had kept such an important shifter away from them. Purposely hid her away for his own gain. Such a slight against mythologicals would never go unpunished. They would make an example out of him, and I wanted to see that happen. I wanted Nix to never have to look over her shoulder again.
“I know you weren’t specifically asking, but I promise you we are going to get you answers.” The reassuring words came from Hiro, but sounds of agreement and assurance came from all of us.
Rolling her shoulders, Nix let out a puff of air. “I want to know more about my father. Is there any chance I have a birth certificate somewhere? A real one? Obviously, the one we had was forged.” Scoffing, she scrubbed a hand over her eyes as she tried to process.
“I’ll get right on that. Should be easy enough to track down if everything was done legally.”
“Legally? Like I might not technically exist on paper?”
I pulled my glasses off as I looked at her. I wouldn’t sugar coat things for her—it wasn’t in my nature—and I knew that Nix was strong. “It’s a possibility.”
“Fuck. I don’t think I can take any more tonight. Is there any other life-altering news you have for me? Or can I go upstairs now?”
I knew she wasn’t upset with us, but I also knew she needed her space. “Nothing else, Nix.” My voice was gentle, and I tried to pour compassion into it. I wanted her to know that I was here for her.
“Ok.” She headed for the stairs but turned around before she started up them. “Thank you, for being so transparent and not hiding shit. I don’t do well with secrets… so… just… thank you.”
We nodded and smiled as she started heading upstairs.
She’s had enough tonight. Let’s get her settled upstairs. I can feel her tiredness taking over, but she hasn’t eaten yet and barely had anything to drink either. Damien started gathering her food as Hiro grabbed a tray from the kitchen. Ryder headed up the stairs after her, and I heard her screech.
“Ryder! I’m going into the bathroom. Why are you following me?”
“I… uh… just needed my… uh… toothbrush?” He stammered unintelligibly.
Really, your toothbrush? I had to laugh through the link that Damien opened up for us.
I didn’t know what to say! Shut it!
“Oh. Well, here.” I heard a rustling sound and laughed at Ryder. We could tell that Nix had just handed him what he’d said he was looking for. “All set?”
“Um, yes. Thanks.” Ryder staggered down the stairs, fancy spinbrush in hand. Well, that went over like a ceraptor without his wings.
You mean a unicorn? I laughed out loud.
Fuck! No! Theo, not you too! Ryder’s forcefully enunciated his words mentally, and I couldn’t help but to quirk my lips to the side. Bloody hell, teasing Ryder was fun.
You walked right into that one. Hiro chuckled.
You should have been more casual about tailing her. What did you expect? Following her into the damn bathroom… Kill’s amusement slide through the line.
Damnit. Real smooth, Ryder. He chided himself. Obviously, I’m not on my game tonight.
It’s alright. It’s been a rough night, and we all just want to make sure she’s not afraid. Hiro soothed him.
Let’s try to be more inconspicuous about following her around, alright? Damien finished talking as he reached the stairs with the tray.
Good luck. Hiro smiled as he sent the thought to Damien.
Looking behind him, he realized we were all firmly planted in our spots. Cowards.
Hey, that was hard enough, and I did most of the talking. I arched an eyebrow in his direction.
Truth. His sigh was telling as he climbed the stairs. Nothing scared the Gargoyle, but our little bird had fire, literally and figuratively, and we all knew she was at her limit for the night. Whether she knew it or not, she had us all wrapped around her finger, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Our connection was strong, and we’d do anything to protect and take care of her.
Eight
Nix
A knock on my door pulled me from my homework induced stupor, and I pulled my headphones off my ears as I tossed the textbook to the end of the bed. I hadn’t resumed classes yet, and I was drowning in the reading and coursework load that had been piling up while I’d been recovering. Thankfully the guys had been able to get my assignments, and I was following along via the syllabus for each class. I’d be damned if I let myself fall behind in school; not after I’d worked so hard. It also served as a great distraction from the saga that was my past. I thought I was handling myself rather well, but I was also trying hard not to dwell on everything I’d learned, lest I drive myself crazy.
“Hello!” A sweet, feminine voice floated through my doorway and I squeaked, hopping up and rushing the door, toppling books in the process. “Your catering service has arrived!” My best friend joked on the other side of the door.
Flinging the bedroom door open, I saw Rini in all her petite glory holding up a donut box. The sweet smell floated to me and my stomach growled appreciatively. “What the hell are you doing here?” I squealed.
“I bring sustenance in the form of sweet sugary goodness. I figured you’d need it but you totally owe me! I almost lost a hand trying to get these past Damien and up the stairs, and then I almost lost the whole damn box to Ryder’s sweet tooth!” She grinned, and I pulled her into the room.
“How many did he get off of you before you made it up the stairs?” I laughed.
“Only two, but I swear it would have been the whole damn box. He may have saved you one… you know… since he likes you and all.” She gave me a silly grin. Glancing over her shoulder, I tried to see if one of her bears would be waiting in the hallway. To my delight, we seemed to have the upstairs to ourselves.
“They’re downstairs if you’re looking for the three musketeers. I convinced them that no horrors awaited in your bedroom unless you counted dirty laundry or dirty fun sex toys.” She grinned salaciously and I laughed.
“Girl, you give me way too much credit for having a naughty side.” We pushed the books on my mattress aside and sat cross legged on the bed, the box of donuts between us. “I’m not the one with three gorgeous hunks to serve her every wanton wish.” I winked as I threw the box open to survey my donut choices.
She shot me an evil grin. “No, you’re the one with five.”
I rolled my eyes. “Kissing is all I’ve done.”
“Or all you’ll own up to.” She wiggled her eyebrows like Ryder. Oh Lord, there were two of them!
I giggled. “What is up with you! You’re getting as bad as Ryder.”
“I have been stuck in that house with three overbearing, overprotective, way-too-sexy-for-my-ovaries-to-handle hunks, and I need a dose of estrogen before I self combust.” She rolled her eyes playfully and I laughed with her, understanding her predicament but also understanding theirs. I’d unwittingly put their mate in danger. If it had been me,
I’d be worried and protective too. I was pretty sure they hated me.
Trying to cover up my sudden wince, I tried to distract her from my reaction by diving into the box of goodies in front of me and choosing a cream filled donut. “I’ll love you forever for this, you know that right?” Biting into it, I moaned loudly.
“Oh, yeah! That’s right baby!” She yelled loudly, eliciting barks of laughter and groans from downstairs. Damn shifter hearing.
I nearly choked. My friend could appear so innocent, but behind those eyes lurked a trouble maker. “What the hell are you doing?” I whispered urgently, trying to swallow the bite I’d taken.
“Just had to get a rise out of them and lighten the mood. They’re all so tense down there.” She shrugged and looked toward the comforter, picking at the stitching.
“Your guys have every right to be upset. Let me clarify that… they have every right to be upset at me. Not the guys. All any of you were trying to do was help me. Thank you, by the way.” Losing my appetite, I put my food back in the box, licking the confectioners sugar off of my fingers.
“It’s my fault.” Her voice broke. “I’m the reason Theo got shot.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Rini, look at me.” When she looked up, I saw the tears swimming in her soft brown eyes.
“It was not your fault. I was the one who dragged my past into your lives and got Theo hurt. I’m the one who put everyone in danger. I wish I could make it go away.” Now I felt the tears pooling in my own eyes.
We looked at each other, taking in our weepy state and started laughing, letting the tears stream down our cheeks. We both reached out, clasping each others wrists, donuts forgotten as we laughed and cried together. It was filled with emotion, but by the time that we were done, I knew we both felt better. I was surprised at how well I had handled the contact, but my Phoenix had needed it as much as Rini and I had.
