“If that’s a compliment, then I like her already.”
Sarah couldn’t help a smile. “For the sake of peace on my first day here, let’s say it is.”
He grinned. “Good. Would you like to look around before dinner? If you feel up to it?”
“I’d like that.” She slipped one foot into a flat shoe and followed him to the main part of the house, using the crutch to take pressure from her ankle.
A large sitting room dominated the front of it and led into a dining room that could seat twenty. Behind that was a kitchen which wouldn’t be out of place in a magazine. It had two double ovens and fridges that included a see-through wine compartment.
“Help yourself to anything you want. There’s a small fridge in your sitting room which I’ll make sure is topped up with anything else you prefer.”
“I don’t expect you to do stuff like that. I can afford to buy what I want, when I want it.”
“I know. It’s not about money, or who’s doing what. Isn’t this all about you laying low for a while, until you decide on what you want to do while resting up?”
He made perfect sense. It was her fear of losing control of her life that was instigating her stubbornness. Even knowing that about herself couldn’t make her willingly accept him telling her what he was going to do for her.
“It’s hard for me to be here and not contribute. That’s not how I operate.”
“I don’t know what to say. I guess I’d feel the same if I was in your shoes.”
“If you were pregnant?”
Christian laughed, that rich mellow sound she liked. “Maybe I can’t empathize totally, but I’m doing my best in this whirlwind relationship, and this was the only solution I could come up with on short notice. I’ll try to be less bossy.”
“And I’ll try not to sound so unappreciative. Especially when I was drawing blanks about an alternative.”
They walked down another hall, similar in length to the one her room was situated in, but the opposite direction.
“Christian? Does this feel weird to you?”
“Yes and no. Having someone in the house I barely know isn’t usual for me, but I feel fine with you being here.”
“That’s nice of you to say, but what about other visitors?”
“Actually, I don’t often have guests.”
“You don’t like to have people around?”
“Not especially. I’m not at all entertaining.”
“That’s not true.” As the words came out, Sarah wanted to bite them back. She blushed furiously at the memory at the way he had entertained her.
He grinned, but didn’t push it. “I’m different outside of home. This is my haven, and I had the idea that after you got used to it, you might think so to.”
Sarah leaned against a wall. “Hang on a minute. I’m not staying long.”
Christian held up a hand. “I didn’t imagine you would. I meant for as long as you feel the need.”
“Not too long. I’ll have to face the music at some stage.”
He nodded. “By then, we would have decided how to handle the intricacies of parenthood. I hope.”
He opened a door which pushed back into its own recess, and they stepped out onto a large covered patio which extended all the way back to the sitting room, effectively quadrupling the living space.
Sarah turned to face him. “You seem so calm about all of this. Aren’t you a little scared?”
“Petrified. I am a surgeon though, so I’m used to hiding my thoughts and emotions. What about you?”
“For the first time in my life, I admit everything scares me, which is incredibly frustrating considering I’m a successful business woman who’s usually more in control.”
Christian nodded. “Tell me what bothers you the most.”
“Mostly I worry I’m strong enough to give birth, or I’ll be a terrible mother.”
He put a hand on her shoulder. “You’re strong. You’ve proven that.”
Sarah frowned even though she liked what he was saying. “You don’t know me.”
“I’ve made it my job to find out about you today. I don’t have an Andy, but I do have Lilith, and she found a lot of evidence to support your strength and business acumen.”
She felt a touch of pride at the findings. “But it’s not the same as being a good parent.”
“Maybe not, but being organized has to help. I did help raise my sister, because Mom had to work such long hours to make ends meet. When she passed away, Jessica was already a teenager, so the baby side of things is a huge concern to me. As for you being a good mother, I bet you had a lot of practice on your own brothers and sister. I’m sure you’ll do fine.”
With their mother attending to the business after their father’s death, Ben and she had been responsible for the other three, but they were also not babies. Did that even count?
“Babies need a lot of attention.”
“They do.”
They were now standing at the edge of a field and could see down the length of the property. Well-manicured lawns surrounded them, and with tall trees bordering the edges, the place was totally secluded.
Christian leaned on a rail. “Will we find out the sex of the baby?”
Sarah shook her head. “I’m too impatient for most things, but I’d like to wait. Is that okay with you?” Asking his opinion was an afterthought, but she might have to be more aware of doing so going forward. And what if she didn’t agree? Ever.
“I’m happy to wait, I just thought it might make it more real for both of us. You don’t even look pregnant, so it is difficult to visualize.”
He was staring at her stomach, so her hand automatically went to rest there. “The baby’s not very big yet.”
“True.” He smiled a little, before looking guilty. “Sarah, I do have something I’d like you to agree to. I know you don’t need money, but I want to help support my child.”
“We can discuss those things later.”
Christian’s hesitation was less noticeable this time. The determined look in those deep blue eyes more so.
“Not everything will wait. I’d like you to do a paternity test.”
She reared back as if he’d slapped her. “Why would I do that? I told you, I haven’t slept with anyone else.”
“If we knew each other more, maybe I wouldn’t need to have it confirmed, but we’ve literally been around each other for less than a week in total.”
“You’ll just have to trust me.”
She hobbled back to the house, quivering with anger. Was he saying she was promiscuous? It sure as hell sounded like it.
He came up behind her, unhampered by an ankle twice its normal size. “Look, it’s not meant as an insult. I have my sister’s welfare to take into consideration. If she got attached to the baby—hell, if I got attached to the baby—and it turned out not to be mine, it would be devastating.”
She stopped and leaned on her crutch so she could poke him in his wonderfully firm chest. “It’s also devastating to be called a liar. You can fancy it up as much as you like, I’m still insulted.” She tried to move, but he stood in her way.
“Sarah. Don’t be mad. I won’t force you to do anything.”
“You couldn’t. I’ll get myself something to eat in my room.”
“Sylvia’s already made dinner for us. It’s in the oven and only needs warming through.”
“Then it won’t matter where its eaten.” If he thought she would sit at his table after his insinuation, he was sadly mistaken.
She was such a fool to come here. What had she hoped for?
Chapter Fourteen
The next day, Christian sat at the dining table with a file he was meant to be studying, but was finding it hard to concentrate on. He kept checking the doorway, and eventually Sarah surfaced. She had shadows under her eyes that he’d hoped to eliminate by bringing her here.
He stood and pulled out a chair. “You didn’t sleep well?”
She brushed away his
concern, refusing to sit down, her chin tilted. “I think me being here is a mistake.”
“Look, if it’s because of the test, then forget it. I won’t mention it again.”
She studied him for a moment. “You’ve changed your mind?”
He frowned. “Sarah, I’m happy to do this your way, but I can’t pretend it wouldn’t make me feel better to have a piece of paper in my hand which tells me I’m the father.”
“You alluded to something. It concerned you being a father to another baby and it didn’t work out.”
He rubbed the top of his head, and went to the counter and boiled the kettle. He didn’t make a drink. He fiddled with bits of paper and the fruit bowl, unsure if he wanted to tell her the sordid story, but it might help.
“She was a woman I’d dated off and on for a while. She had a fling with a friend of mine, then insisted she was having my child. I decided to believe her. It wasn’t a great time for any of us and eventually she decided to have the test. I was not the father. I should have been relieved, I am now, but at the time I was so invested that…it hurt Sarah. It was like I’d lost him. I know it’s stupid, because he wasn’t mine in the first place. But I didn’t know that.”
She looked like she was giving it some serious thought, which was a start. When she sat down, he let out a breath he hadn’t been aware he was holding.
Then her chin went up. “I’m sorry, Christian, I truly am. But I’m not her.”
He couldn’t win this battle of wills, and he couldn’t let her leave. Not yet. “Okay. Let’s not discuss it further. What would you like for breakfast? There’s cereal or toast. I can whip up some eggs, or would you like something else?”
“I’d like it if you didn’t fuss, especially if I stay. I can’t sit on my backside and have people waiting on me. Point me in the general direction and I’ll get it myself.”
He did as she asked, and she came back to the dining room to eat her cereal and fruit, which was painful to watch since she could only use one hand, but it was also a huge relief. He’d been worried she was going to hibernate in her room for the duration of her stay, or that she’d already called Andy or one of the brothers to collect her.
She was such a mixture of warmth and coolness. The warmth made him want her, even when the cool pushed him to the extreme. The need to have her near, despite the fear the baby wasn’t his, was so strong it made him nervous.
He sat with her until she’d finished, trying to concentrate on his file, aware of her every movement. “What do you plan to do today?” he ventured.
She began to clear her plate, ignoring the crutch, and using the furniture for leverage.
“I’m going to do some work, and I promised to call my mom. Fascinating stuff.”
Her sarcasm was better than her silence. “Don’t overdo it on your first day. If you want a car, my sister’s is in the garage. The keys are hanging by the back door.”
“You said she was overseas, where exactly?”
“She’s in Argentina finishing her last year of study. We’ve always been pretty close and I was going to go see her last month, but I’ve been swamped. I have to go into the hospital for a surgery this morning, and I have a couple of appointments, so I won’t be back until later this afternoon. Sylvia will be in to cook dinner, she won’t knock, so don’t get a fright.”
“Thanks, and don’t think you have to clock in with me. Do what you normally do. I’m going to try to do the same.”
As much as he had to go, he would have rather stayed. He wanted to break down her barriers and work things out. Patience was second nature to him when he was in surgery, yet is was proving elusive around Sarah.
Knowing it was no use trying to get her to leave the dishes, he went to get changed. On his way back, he passed through the kitchen and could hear her on the phone out on the deck. He couldn’t hear the other side of the conversation, and hated that he was eavesdropping, but it was interesting, and his excuse was that it did concern him.
“Mom, it’s okay. He’s being nice, he just wants to know he’s the father.”
“No, I won’t do it. If he thinks I’m lying then that’s his problem.”
“I’ll come home if he gets heavy handed. You know how stubborn I am.”
“The laptop will keep me in contact with those I need to, and I’ll be back at work before they miss me too much.”
“Thanks, Mom. I love you too. I’ll ring tomorrow.”
“Yes, or before if I need you. Bye.”
The small laugh lifted his spirits. He was also intrigued that Sarah had told her mother about his request. Was Eloise Knight defending him or agreeing that he had no say? If it was the later then he would simply bide his time until the baby was born and then, if necessary, he’d get a court order for the test. It’s not how he wanted things to be, but if Sarah left him no choice, he wouldn’t hesitate.
He’d been down this road before, he knew how it worked. He wanted to believe her, because he wanted it to be real this time.
Chapter Fifteen
Each day that passed saw Sarah’s opinions about Christian fluctuate from admiring him physically and mentally, to thinking he was too smug. Too Handsome. And far too sure of himself.
The trouble was, she could see that a lot of his attributes and failings were her own. It created a highly charged situation in direct contrast to why she was here.
It was a time of day thing, too. In the morning he was more aloof, but solicitous about her health. In the evening, especially if he was late, he was apologetic and talkative, as if he’d missed her.
She tried not to look forward to his homecoming. Tried not to have feelings which had begun in Rarotonga, and had come back with a vengeance. In one of the many books she’d been reading on pregnancy, they’d written about cravings for sex in the second trimester. Perhaps it was natural hormones that created this spark of lust each time she heard his voice or saw him walk through the door. Sometimes, she only had to think of him.
Whatever it was, she wished it would quit already. It was embarrassing how her nipples peaked when he spoke gently to her, or looked at her in that smoldering way he had.
Tonight, Christian had suggested they eat on the verandah as it was such a lovely night. She’d agreed, and now they sat next to each other, closer than they had since the honeymoon. Too close. She could smell his cologne—a heady mixture of musk and citrus, another reminder of that night.
He had a glass of wine which he clinked against her glass of juice, evoking yet another memory of the place where they had first met.
“What are we celebrating?”
“The surgery I did today was a success.” He said with pride.
“Are they usually failures, then?” she asked, deadpan.
He raised an eyebrow, then grinned. “Don’t be cheeky. This one was special. It was a teenager I’ve been seeing for a few years, and he’s had several operations. I believe this will be his last.”
“Nice story. Who doesn’t like a happy ending?”
He took a long drink, a faraway look in his eyes. “It would be great, but it’s unfortunately not always the case.”
“Are you talking about us?” Sarah wanted to bite back the question as soon as it left her lips.
“I wasn’t actually, but since you asked, do you want there to be an us.”
“No, not that kind of us.”
He reached across the pristine white tablecloth and picked up her hand. “We could give it a try.”
“You’re deliberately misunderstanding me.” It was funny how her hand stayed right where it was. It felt good to touch him.
“Maybe. Don’t you remember Rarotonga? That was some day and night.”
“It was, but it was all about the sex.”
“It’s a good place to start. I’ve never stopped wanting you, even when I was angry about you leaving me like that. I’d resigned myself to not seeing you again. It was a shock to have you turn up unexpectedly, and pregnant.”
“Don�
�t, Christian.”
“Don’t what? Tell the truth? Can you honestly say that you have no feelings for me—sexual or otherwise?”
“I’m not saying anything of the sort.”
“Because you’re stubborn. Because you think going it alone is the only way. You don’t have to be a saint, Sarah.”
She shook her head. “I know I’m not a saint, but surely you don’t think sex is going to fix anything.”
Unfairly, he flashed those dimples. “It will sure fix a few things for me. I haven’t slept with anyone since you, and it had been a long time prior to that. I’m practically a monk. I don’t know what you did to bewitch me, but all I think about is your perfect skin. Perfect body.”
She gulped. “But it would be wrong.”
“How? We’re two consenting adults. It’s not like we’re strangers anymore. And, it’s not like you could get pregnant.”
“That’s not funny.”
“It kind of is.”
At any other time, Sarah would have headed for the hills, but if she was going home in a day or two, this might be their last chance to be together. Her last chance to be with Christian, the way she’d been with him in Rarotonga. She wanted him so badly her skin tingled.
“Okay.”
His glass tipped and red wine spread across the white turning the cloth to a frothy pink as it went.
“You’re playing with me,” he said, huskily.
Shivers raced across her, and she was not in the least cold. “I’m not. Not yet. The thing is, I want you too, and before I get fat, I want to make love with a man who knows what to do.”
He frowned as he digested her flippant manner. “I think I’m okay with that. Yes, as it turns out, I am. Shall we?” he stood and pulled her to her feet.
Walking along the corridor she hadn’t been all the way down before, her mind began warring with her libido once more. It was losing big time, which didn’t upset her as much as it should. His fingers caressed hers and her legs began to shake.
Christian’s bedroom was massive. It had a similar outlook to her own, but from the other wing. The bed was a monster. “Getting bedding to fit must be difficult.” She couldn’t believe she’d said that aloud. Her head was all over the place, but her body knew exactly how to react.
Reluctant Billionaire (Billionaire Knights) Page 6
