by Sabrina Kade
She shrugs. “You do all of these things. You wouldn’t be a good protector if you didn’t.”
Testing me. Always testing me.
“Never mind,” she quickly says before I can respond to her protector remark. “I don’t want to fight.” She quickly rises back into a standing position, meeting my eyes. It’s rare, and both of us are shocked by it. She doesn’t get to see my face up close too often. The massive height difference between us does not allow for natural eye contact.
Which is precisely why I can never take her.
“Oh,” she gasps suddenly, leaning forward.
I pull back. “What?”
“It’s just…” She giggles, but it’s an uncomfortable sound, much different than the one I used to hear. “I don’t think I’ve seen your face up close like this before.”
“I was thinking the same thing.” My response is automatic. Suddenly, I am relieved humans cannot dive into the minds of other beings. Ellis would be frightened to discover what I am thinking about.
Ellis is more radiant up close than she is standing beside me. Now, I not only see the top of her head but her eyes and full, pouty mouth. Her cheeks are full like a sprog’s, but unlike the other young-looking human female, Ellis’ eyes gleam with untold stories and unfinished confrontations. Within the depths of those muddy brown eyes are galaxies worth of knowledge, and I want nothing more than to learn about them. I want to know how someone can look so young and so old at the same time.
How can someone be small and fierce at the same time?
I bet her cunt is a beautiful blend—
“I always thought your eyes were just gold,” Ellis interrupts my thoughts before I have to stroke my cock to relieve the building pressure. “Like this, though, I can see there’s brown swirling around. Can you…” she trails off, sounding tentative.
“You do not have to be afraid to ask me anything, Ellis.”
She glances off to the side, nervously shifting before she speaks again. I am relieved the words will come because it means she is not too frightened to ask. “Can you hold still? I swear I won’t do anything weird, I just want to have a closer look. All you guys are so fudging tall, I can’t get a close look at your faces. But right here? I can see you… and… and it’s nice.” Her eyes lock with mine, and my pulse quickens. I feel some of the scales splay away from my cock.
“Touch me as you see fit,” I mutter as she leans closer. Her hand lifts and fingers unfurl close to my jaw, testing the surface.
“Your skin is always chilly,” she says softly. “Some of the others are hot.”
“We are known to run at different degrees of warm and cold.”
“Your face is cool. I like it.” She traces fingers across my jaw and cheek, testing the scales on the bones under my eyes. “These are incredible.”
My cock can’t take another compliment without reacting. My shorts tighten. I smell her. How can she expect to get this close to me and not expect a reaction? She is testing me, for sure. Prince Korben knew this one would push me to my limit. I must not give in.
“The light hits them, and they look like little rainbows.”
She licks her lips, testing the surface as her eyes flick up to meet mine. I lower my attention, ashamed I have allowed myself to become weak around a human, or any female for that matter. So single-minded. The only thing that’s on my mind is mating with her. Pleasuring her. Making her scream out my name.
She pulls her hand away, and I lean forward to find her touch again before realizing how silly I must seem.
“Sorry if I’m making you uncomfortable,” she says quickly.
“You are not.”
I say nothing more because I’ve never been good with words. I can say much more with my fists. If I like someone, I won’t use them on their face. If I don’t like them, they may as well stop looking for mates because they are about to get ugly like me. Violence is my only friend, so I’ve never found a reason to choose a mate. Right before exile, Prince Korben needed protection all the time, so there was no time to think about something as meaningless as a mate. Not that any women were trying to claim me. I may be a fierce fighter but I suppose that doesn’t make up for my face. Even Azan, who claims no one cared for him before York, had secret admirers who watched him from afar. But he always rejected them because he worried no one could love him because of the poisonous fangs behind his mask.
I did not even have the option to reject an interested mate.
So I put all my energy into protecting Prince Korben and any of those who supported his beliefs. Murder was never a crime in my mind if it saved the ones I cared about. Pleasure was something for beautiful beings. I don’t know what it feels like to have my face between a female’s thighs. I do not know the joy of passing out when a woman squeezes me, letting me know she is interested in mating. And I certainly do not know what it feels like to spill my seed into a woman in hopes of giving her a sprog.
After my initial meeting with Ellis, I became unusually curious about these sensations.
Does having a Chosen change a male so much? Prince Korben certainly seems calmer, and Azan has become clumsy in desperation to please his mate.
I don’t know if I want that.
I don’t want to be weak.
I don’t think Prince Korben and the others will stay on Hethdiss forever, and when we are allowed back to the fatherland, I don’t want to be ruined because I have spent my time with a woman’s thighs wrapped around my head when I should have been working on my spars and attacks.
But Ellis makes me wonder if it would be worth it.
Some of my brothers may find the humans small and strange, only worthy of tending to their needs like pets or slaves, but they also humor them because they fear Prince Korben and myself.
Ellis is neither of those things to me.
She does not look like any Sidyth woman I’ve ever seen, and she is much more beautiful. Her skin reminds me of the mud on the walls if mixed with the slightest hint of jendari cream back home. Her eyes are like black holes in the starry sky, pulling me in and drawing me closer. And her body… there are no words to describe it. I suppose if I had to, I would say she is fragile, but she is not frail. Ellis is sharp looking with thick muscles in her thighs and ample rear. And though her chest is not as shockingly prominent as Prince Korben’s mate’s, she is womanlier than Azan’s mate who reminds me of a sprog about to begin his studies.
Her frowns are beautiful.
Her smiles are spectacular.
A small, sick part of me loves the fear on her features because, for the first time, I long to take it away.
“You looked like you were uncomfortable.” Ellis takes a few tentative steps away from me. I feel the heat of her body leaving the mix of mine, and I don’t like it.
“I am not uncomfortable with you touching me,” I say quickly, not minding my choice of words. “I was wondering if you’d let me touch you in the same way.”
I shouldn’t say this, but the words tumbled out before I could contain them.
Ellis’ dark eyes widen in shock. Fear. She’s thinking of Yayk.
“I am not him,” I say in a low voice, throwing my legs over the edge of the bed. I spread my thighs slightly, inviting space for her to fill. I don’t know why I’m so intent on teasing myself, but the idea of her standing between my thighs is enough to make me push forward. “And I would never hurt you.” I pat my thigh, hoping she doesn’t view this as an insult. Ellis is very concerned about being seen as a woman despite her size and youthful features.
“Are you sure?” Ellis sounds like she’s struggling to keep her breathing steady, and now she almost seems as nervous as me.
I start to close my thighs. “Am I asking too much?”
“No!” she squeaks. “I just… I didn’t picture this happening when I snuck into your room.”
“What did you picture?” I start to spread my thighs apart for her as she inches forward, resting and curling her hands around my knees.
“I didn’t think you’d be so open to this...”
“Seeing you at this level has let me see you in a new light, I suppose.” I shrug as the urge to close my legs around her seizes me. I am tempting myself. I do not know how much longer I will be able to contain my desire for this woman, but for now, I simply want to gaze upon her beauty.
Ellis lets out another shaky breath. “Are you sure you’re awake?” She takes another step, and finally, she’s entirely situated between my thighs. Our eyes meet.
“I can assure you I am awake.”
“Does this mean…” she trails off, standing up on her tip toes just a bit, completely closing off any gap in differences between us.
“Mean… what?” I tilt my head to the side, enjoying the warmth of her scaleless skin.
“Are you…” she slicks her un-forked tongue across her full, pink lips. “Do you Choose me?”
My face darkens. Testing me. I gently push her away and close my thighs. Why do I continue to do this to myself? Of course she would ask that.
“Ellis,” I say firmly. “You know I cannot do that.”
Her face turns pouty. Angry. Pissed off. They are all beautiful expressions on her rounded features. I resist the urge to pull her back closer to me. Press my lips against hers like I’ve seen Azan and Korben doing with their Chosens. I worry I’ll swallow Ellis if I try such a thing, but that doesn’t stop my mind from considering.
“Why?”
“Because you are not in your right mind, Ellis.” Looking at her this closely is making me weak. I quickly stand, so I don’t have to see the maturity in her eyes masked by her chubby cheeks. “I am not right for you.”
“Yes, you are.” She stares up with hurt written on her face. It’s terrible. “You are.”
It’s the one expression I do not care for.
She’s disappointed. She’s hurt by my words and even more so by my reactions. And why shouldn’t she be? I invited her into my arms. I stared into her eyes. I made her feel as though I was going to give her pleasure, but then I shoved her away.
All because she uttered that word. Choose. She wants me to Choose her. I don’t know what her motive is. A test. Her behavior has to be a test. Korben wants to see if I’m able to resist her.
He must reason that if I’m able to resist a woman throwing herself at me, then I must be able to continue protecting him. There is no other explanation.
And yet, I have fallen for Ellis’ feminine charm. Again.
Why does this woman tempt me so easily?
“You know I cannot Choose you, Ellis. That wasn’t part of the assignment.”
Pink erupts across her cheeks. Despite her being tiny, I wince back in shock.
“Are you married to someone back home?” she snarls.
“No. I have never even received attention from a woman.”
“Then what is the fucking problem? Are you not…” She licks her lips and stumbles back towards my lair’s entrance. I am not sure where she is going with this, but all traces of her arousal have floated away, replaced with hurt. “Are you not attracted to me or something?”
“Not attracted—” I stop myself short before I say something I’ll immediately regret. How can she ask me such a thing? Not attracted to her? She’s the only thing attractive on this planet! Her beauty is the reason why Prince Korben wanted me to get close to her! He knew she would tempt me. She looks like a smaller, rounder version of his mate! So, of course, he chose her to test me!
“So that’s what it is,” Ellis huffs. “You’re not attracted to me.”
“I…” The words blossom, but do not fully bloom.
Ellis’ back hits the wall next to the opening, and I realize I only have a few moments before she storms away. My mind and body are at war. My heart and my soul. My brain and my cock. They’re all in complete disagreement, and all because of this being with wild, curly hair and full, smooth cheeks. She’s crossing her arms across her chest, retreating into her memories of Yayk because she can control these horrors. The thought of that monster in her mind angers me more than I’d like. My anger takes over.
“Do not think about him when you’re here with me!” I roar.
She winces and uncrosses her arms. I smell less fear. More anger. Good. Her passion keeps her from retreating into painful memories.
“Why do you care who I think about?”
“Because I care. You are with me. You have no reason to think about him.”
She barks out a bitter laugh. “You can’t be serious!” Her eyes widen as I draw closer, daring her to continue. She’s shaking slightly, but she’s also gathering her courage. “You can’t ask to touch me, pull me close, and then say you’re not attracted to me!”
“I never said I was not attracted to you.”
“You may as well have.” She shifts toward the lair opening. “Hujun, you’re not playing fair. It’s cruel, you know?”
“I never said I was kind.”
“You were kind to me. But what you just pulled right there? That wasn’t kind. That was mean.”
“I did not realize wanting to explore your face would lead you to believe I was going to Choose you. If there was any confusion—”
“Of course, there was confusion, you poopsicle! Lean down!”
“What—”
“Lean down, you mammoth!”
I’m not sure what this word mammoth means but I’m too scared to ask Ellis to clarify and follow her orders.
“Lower,” she hisses in a voice that’s almost Sidyth.
I drop further. She grips my head and pulls my face until my nose touches hers. My cock stiffens painfully, and I take in a sharp breath.
“This does nothing for you, Hujun?” She closes her eyes, curling her fingers through my short hair. My thighs tingle. My scales flare away from my skin. Weak. “Do you think being this close is only for innocent exploration?” I can’t answer her. “And if you believe that, why don’t you get close with another girl? Why not hold Sloane like this? Or Phoebe? Or Kansas? Why do you only let me in like this?”
“I am supposed to protect you,” I manage to gasp. “I am supposed to make you feel safe. I simply wanted to—”
“And you don’t feel anything down there when we’re this close? When you can feel my fingers through your hair? When your cock presses against my belly? Are you fucking kidding me? Hujun, your dick is stabbing me in the stomach.”
“I cannot help how my body reacts.” I pinch my eyes shut, begging my cock to settle down, but it is worthless. She is too close. She is too brave. She is challenging me, so I may bend to her will. I should pull away. I should send her out of my lair. So many ‘shoulds’, but no words or actions come. I brush my nose against hers.
“Is this all you want from me? You want to protect me. You want to keep me safe. I feel safe with you already, Hujun. What’s wrong with giving each other more?”
I can’t answer. She’s right. It’s not wrong to want more. I want more. I want so much more with this woman. But I will not be made a fool of. I slowly open my eyes.
“I only want to keep you safe. I only want to protect you.” The words feel scratchy in my throat. The lie stings. “I am only doing what Prince Korben asked me to.”
“Bullshit,” she hisses, pushing my body away from hers. She doesn’t move me, but I give her space and stand at my full height, looking down upon her. Ellis’ eyes are angry and hurt. Disappointed and aroused. Too many emotions at once. I cannot focus on all of them.
“It is not bullshit, as you say,” I grumble. “You must understand that my physical reaction has nothing to do with you, Ellis.”
“IT IS FUCKING BULLSHIT! And so are you!” She reaches out and pokes a short finger against my chest several times. “You're an asshole, Hujun. Don’t brush your cock against my stomach, and then say you’re not attracted to me.”
“I didn’t say that—”
“You may as well have!” She spins away, and I drag a hand down my face.
/> “Where are you going alone?”
“Back to the Gathering Room.”
“You can stay—”
“I’m not staying with you just because you’re keeping me safe. I don’t need your protection.”
I wince, her words hitting harder than I expected. “You don’t know what you’re saying. You are recovering—”
“Let me reiterate. I don’t need your type of protection.”
Something protective stirs in my chest. I gently seize her arm and hold her back. She can’t leave.
“Let me go,” she snarls.
“You need my protection, Ellis. If not for me—”
“If not for you, yes! Your little buddy would have got his groove on without permission.” My nostrils flare, but Ellis keeps talking before I can hiss at her. “It wouldn’t have been the first time.”
“He is not my buddy.”
She rolls her eyes. “He may as well be. At least he goes after what he wants.” My fingers loosen in surprise, and that gives her enough of an opening to stumble away. “You say you want to protect me, Hujun. Well, your protection is hurting more than helping.”
“That was never my intent.”
“I’m not a baby.”
“But you are small.”
“That doesn’t mean I need your pity.”
She storms down the hall, and though everything in my body begs to go after her, I remain in the doorway until I can no longer see her as she rounds the corner.
Charity case.
The simplification of my duties annoys me, but what bothers me even more, is that Ellis is upset.
That hurts. The last thing I want is for Ellis to be disappointed in me.
And that’s when it dawns on me.
For the first time, I realize Ellis’ opinion of me matters more than Prince Korben’s.
I’m not quite sure what to do with this information.
CHAPTER THREE
Ellis
He doesn’t come after me.
Of course, he doesn’t! Why would I think my completely unromantic scaled beast of an alien would run after me like something out of a romance novel? Sigh. Still, it doesn’t hurt any less when I’m only a few feet away from the Gathering Room, and Hujun hasn’t come after me. I don’t want to go inside. I know some of the girls will want to ask questions – especially Kansas. She did a favor, and I completely wasted it.
