Leah tapped her foot against the carpeted floor as if the nervous energy whirling inside her couldn’t wait to escape. “When I’m with Felton, it’s… pleasant. Nice. We have enjoyable visits and nothing bad happens.”
“Go on.”
“He’s polite and thoughtful and pays me quite a lot of attention.”
Cecilia watched Leah, her blue eyes wide and unblinking, but didn’t say anything.
“I don’t want to sound as if I’m ungrateful for his attentions. I’m not.”
“I know.”
“If I’d never met Daniel, I might not have known how… how wonderful it can be between and man and a woman.” The warmth. The feeling of belonging. Of perfection. “You understand, don’t you?”
Cecilia lifted one side of her lips. “Of course I do. It is wonderful.”
“Felton could offer me marriage, a nice home, a secure future for me and any children we might have.”
“Those are all positive things.”
“Yes, they are. More than I had ever hoped to have.” Guilt washed over her again. Was she being selfish for wanting her family to have a better life?
“But Mr. Kensington hasn’t asked for your hand yet, has he?”
“No, but I have a strong feeling it won’t be long in coming.” Every time they were together, Leah had wondered, Will today be the day?
“Having seen the way he is around you, I’m inclined to agree. So, he can offer you several things. Especially security.”
“Right.”
“But not love?”
“I don’t… I suppose, as you said, love might come in time, but I’m not sure it would be the same.”
“The same as with Daniel.”
Leah nodded. There would be no comparison. She knew it deep in her heart.
“Now, tell me a little about Daniel. How he makes you feel. What he could offer you that Mr. Kensington couldn’t.”
Heat climbed up Leah’s cheeks when she thought of Daniel’s warm kisses. His caring caresses. The way he held her. The sweet words he said. “When I’m with Daniel, I feel alive. Treasured. Adored.”
“Ah yes. I know that kind of love.” Cecilia sighed, her expression dreamy.
“It’s as if he’s my other half. The man I’ve been waiting for. The one who was created just for me.” Leah pressed her hand to her chest. “My body reacts to him in strange ways.” She shook her head slowly. “No, that’s not right. Not strange exactly…”
“New? Different?”
“Yes. That and… When he’s near, I feel a pull toward him, like I can’t help myself. That if I don’t embrace him, I might die. Does that sound silly?”
“Not in the least. You’ve just described true love.”
“Have I?”
Cecilia laughed. “I think you already know the answer to that.”
“Yes, I guess I do. Perhaps I’m feeling guilty.”
“About Mr. Kensington?”
“About both of them.”
“But why would you feel guilt about Daniel? You’ve said he doesn’t seem to take much seriously. He hasn’t asked for your hand. And wasn’t he the one who encouraged you to try for a match with Mr. Kensington?”
Leah took a deep breath and let it out. “That’s where things have changed.”
Cecilia tilted her head. “Oh?”
“You see, yesterday Uncle Percy caught my attention when I was passing by the library.”
Cecilia chuckled. “Whenever someone starts a sentence with Uncle Percy, I know there’s an interesting story.”
“Then you won’t be disappointed this time either.”
“Do tell.” She folded her hands in her lap.
“He requested that I go up into the attic to retrieve an antique vase that was his mother’s.”
“In the attic? There’s nothing much up there but old clothing and bits of this and that.”
“I found that out.”
“If he really believed the vase was up there, why didn’t he ask one of the servants?”
“That was my question. He said he didn’t trust them to handle it since it was fragile. He also spoke in whispers, saying he didn’t want them even to hear his request.” Leah lowered her voice for the last part as if mimicking Percy.
“This sounds strange. Even for Percy. Go on.”
“Once I got inside the attic, the door slammed shut behind me. It was locked.”
“Locked?” Cecilia widened her eyes. “How frightening. The few times I’ve been up there, I didn’t enjoy it one bit.”
“Believe me, I was scared to death.”
“What did you do?”
“I pounded on the door and yelled until someone came.” Leah tried to push away the memory of the hot, stuffy room, the near-darkness, the fear that no one would find her.
“And obviously someone did, for here you are. Who was it?”
“Daniel.”
Cecilia narrowed her eyes. “I see.”
“You do?”
“Uncle Percy is a master of creating situations to, shall we say, bring people together.”
“I do believe you’re right.”
“Don’t keep me in suspense. What happened next?”
“Daniel stood between me and the door. Wouldn’t let me leave. Then he…” Her face heated again.
Cecilia smiled. “I can guess what he might have done next.”
“Well, there was quite a bit of that.” Her entire body warmed at the memory.
“Which you didn’t mind in the least, I’m guessing.”
“No.” Leah giggled. “I didn’t mind.” In fact, she’d been very disappointed when he stopped.
“And then?”
“Then he said he’d been wrong to send me in Mr. Kensington’s direction. And also… that he loved me.”
“He did?”
She nodded. “And… he asked me to marry him. He said he’d leave the choice to me.”
Cecilia grabbed Leah and enfolded her in a tight hug. “Oh, my darling. How you’ve waited to hear those words from him.” She sat back and studied Leah’s face. “But you’re still conflicted about what to do?”
Leah pulled back and swallowed hard against the lump in her throat. “Very conflicted. I agreed to see Felton because of the future he could give me.”
“But that was mostly because you didn’t think Daniel was serious about marriage.”
“True. But it doesn’t change the fact that Daniel is still a valet and can’t give me and my children a secure future. You know what it was like growing up poor.”
“Indeed I do.”
“I don’t want that for any children I might have. It tears me up inside, thinking that they might be how I was. No money. Sometimes barely enough to keep hunger at bay. Please, my dear friend, tell me what I should do.”
Cecilia shook her head. “I wish I could. But it must be your decision. It sounds like your choices right now are Mr. Kensington with a secure future but not necessarily love, or Daniel, the love of your life but an uncertain future.”
“I just don’t know who I should choose. What would be best for my future.”
Cecilia placed her hand on Leah’s cheek. “My love, something tells me that you will make the right decision. I have faith in you.”
Leah let out a breath. “I’m glad someone does.
Chapter Twenty
Leah wrung her hands together as she paced back and forth in front of her favorite garden bench. Rollo lounged beneath in the shade, her kittens romping with unrestrained glee around Leah’s moving feet. She kept glancing down, making sure not to step on a tiny tail or paw.
Felton should be there any moment. He was nothing if not punctual. Did she have the courage to do what in her heart she knew she must? How would he react?
Cecilia was several yards away on another bench, reading a book. She was to be the chaperone, but Leah had requested a little bit of privacy in which to speak to Felton.
She hadn’t gotten to sleep until quite late the nig
ht before, agonizing over what to do. But then she’d had a dream about Daniel. It seemed so real. His warm skin caressing hers. His lips, hot and moist, pressed against her lips, her neck, her—
A hot flush crept up her chest and neck as she replayed each moment. When she’d woken up that morning, she had no doubt what she had to do. Down deep, she’d always known, she supposed, though practicality had taken over for a while.
But if a dream could make her feel like that, then she could only imagine how it would be when she finally gave herself completely to Daniel.
A smile crossed her lips when she remembered Daniel’s proposal. Part of her still had trouble believing it. He’d always been so jovial. Never serious. But he’d meant it in the attic. She had no doubt.
While it was true that they would be poor, somehow it didn’t seem to matter as much anymore. When she allowed herself to imagine a life without Daniel…
No. To her way of thinking, that wouldn’t be much of a life at all.
“Miss Hunter?”
Leah jumped. Felton had arrived. And stood a few yards away. He spoke with Cecilia for a moment before heading in Leah’s direction. When he reached her, she took a deep breath and held out her hand to him.
“Good day. Would you like to join me on the bench?”
He smiled. Did he think she’d give him the answer he desired?
After she was seated, she arranged her skirts. He sat down next to her and took her hand.
She’d hoped he wouldn’t do that. Wouldn’t add to the way she already felt about having to refuse his proposal. However, given how she’d allowed him to kiss her a Vauxhall Gardens, he would surely have the expectation of touching her now.
He squeezed her hand. “Leah, I made it quite clear the other night why I would visit you today. And that I would expect an answer.”
She forced a pleasant expression on her face. This was going to be so difficult. From the twinkle in his eyes, surely he expected her to accept.
“Might I be so bold as to forego pleasantries and simply ask for your answer?”
Her mouth went dry and she swallowed. “O-of course.”
His eyes crinkled at the corners, like a small boy’s might when waiting to open a gift. He laughed. “Nervous, are we? And what, my dear, would that answer be?”
The time had come. But she must do it. After the unpleasantness was over, she could go to Daniel and accept his offer. “Please know that I’ve given this much serious consideration.”
“I wouldn’t have expected anything less. Marriage is a very important step.” He rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand.
“In light of that… I—”
“I think I know what your answer will be. But if it’s too difficult for you to say the words, perhaps… a kiss might do for my answer?”
She shook her head and blinked back tears. She hated to hurt him. He was a kind, generous man.
His smile fell. “You don’t wish to kiss me?”
“I don’t wish to…”
He put his finger beneath her chin. “Don’t wish to… what?”
She bit her lip and averted her gaze to Rollo, who had crawled out from beneath the bench to follow her kittens across the garden. Finally, Leah forced out the words, “Marry you.”
“Pardon? You said it so softly I couldn’t hear.”
“M-marry you.”
“You’ll marry me? My darling, you’ve made me so happy, I—”
“No… I… that is, I can’t marry you.”
He blinked. “What?”
She shook her head, trying to convey the words that she didn’t want to have to utter again.
“Are you saying you’re refusing my marriage proposal?”
She nodded and slipped her hand from his.
“I don’t understand.”
Why was he making this so difficult? Couldn’t a woman simply refuse a man and be done with it? She raised her gaze then, realizing she needed to say the words again, this time while looking him in the eye. “Please know that I appreciate your proposal and—”
He stood abruptly. “Appreciate?”
“You’re a very kind man.”
“Kind?”
“I’m sorry, Felton. I… I don’t love you.”
He sat back down and grabbed her shoulders. “But many couples aren’t in love when they first marry. You could learn to love me, couldn’t you?”
She shook her head.
“Think of all you’re giving up. I can provide for you very well. Give you a home of your own. A secure future.”
“I’d thought that would be enough for me, but… it isn’t.”
He blinked. “Have you had another offer? Is that what this is about?”
She cleared her throat but didn’t answer.
“I think I at least deserve to know the name of my competition.”
“I really don’t think that’s—”
“You owe me that at least. Don’t you think?”
Leah let out a slow breath. “Very well. I’ve had another offer. From Mr. Barlow.”
“Who the hell is Mr. Barlow? I’ve never heard of him.”
“He’s…” She pointed in the general direction of the house.
Felton looked at the house and back to her, his brow furrowed. “I don’t understand. Mr. Barlow… lives here too?”
“Yes.”
“Is he a relative of the Radcliff’s?”
“Not exactly.”
“Then who else…” He stopped and rubbed his hand over his face. “Wait. Isn’t Mr. Radcliff’s valet named Barlow? The one who helped you with the horse that day?”
Her face heated. She gripped her hands in her lap, wishing Felton would leave. That this terrible ordeal would end. From the corner of her eye, she saw movement. Cecilia was standing, staring at them. Leah shook her head slightly, giving her friend the signal that she could handle the situation. Cecilia sat back down, but kept watching them.
Felton stood again. “That’s it, isn’t it? You’ve had an offer from the valet?” He laughed, but there wasn’t humor in it. “Do you have any idea what you’re doing? What I’m offering you? What in the world can someone like him, a servant, offer you that I can’t? Will you at least answer me that?”
Tired of belaboring the conversation, wanting him to go away and never return, she stood up, straightened her spine, and looked him square in the eye. “I tried to spare you the details. I had no wish to hurt your feelings. But since you won’t let it alone, I will tell you. Mr. Barlow can offer me the one thing that you can’t.”
“And that is?”
“True love.”
Felton laughed again, his voice full of spite. “You actually believe in that?”
“I do.”
“Then you’re a fool.”
She pointed to the garden gate. “I’d like you to leave now.”
His face reddened, but he didn’t reply. Turning on his heel, he walked away, gave a curt, “Good day,” to Cecilia, and was gone.
Leah slumped to the bench and burst into tears.
Chapter Twenty-one
Once Leah spent some time in her room and composed herself, she went to seek out Daniel but couldn’t find him. Why didn’t he seem to be near Mr. Radcliff’s rooms lately? Was he shirking his duties?
She headed downstairs and found him in the library reading a book. Why wasn’t he working? She pushed the thought aside. That wasn’t important now. Not when she had wonderful news to give him. She stepped into the room. “Daniel?”
He looked up and smiled. “What a pleasant surprise.” He closed his book and set it on the floor then patted the seat next to him. “Join me, won’t you?”
She crossed the room, never taking her eyes from his face. Now that she’d spoken to Felton, she was free to accept Daniels’ proposal. Her heart soared.
But first, she wanted to give Daniel a little taste of his own medicine. All those weeks of him teasing her had made her want to do the same. Just this once. Being a jester wa
sn’t his alone. She sat down and smiled. “I had a visitor earlier.”
His smile fell. “Did you?”
“Yes. Mr. Kensington.”
“I see. Is he… still here?”
“No. He left.”
“Oh.” He drummed his fingers on his knee. “I suppose I might as well just come out and ask you… Are you now betrothed?”
“Yes. I mean I think so.”
Daniel let out a long sigh. “I… I wish for you every happiness.”
“Thank you. I’m sure I will be very happy.”
“If I may ask…”
“You may ask me anything.”
“Do you… care for him at all?”
Leah pressed her hand over her chest. “Very much so. In fact, I love him with all my heart.”
“I see. And has he told you the same?”
“Yes, he has. But I wish that I’d told him earlier that I loved him too.”
“Why is that?”
She shrugged. “When he first professed his love to me, at the time I wasn’t sure what to make of it.”
“You weren’t?”
“No. You see, I’ve never thought of an attic as a very romantic setting.”
He frowned and then widened his eyes. “Did you say… attic?”
“I did.”
“You mean…”
“Yes.”
Daniel took her in his arms and held her tight. At that moment, Leah didn’t care if someone happened to walk by and see them. Let the whole world see them. Daniel kissed her. It was the sweetest, most loving kiss she’d ever experienced. It spoke of promises, happiness, and a lifetime of being with her heart’s one true love.
He ended the kiss and looked deep into her eyes. “Leah Hunter, you have made me the happiest man alive.”
“Me too.”
He raised one eyebrow. “You’re the happiest man alive?”
She laughed. “No. I’m just happy. Deliriously so.”
Daniel stood and pulled her up beside him. He wrapped her in his arms as if he didn’t want to let her go. “Will you do something for me?”
“Of course.”
“I want you to go to your room and get your hat and pelisse. Meet me back here in a quarter of an hour. Will you do that?”
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