The next morning, I woke up and experimented a moment of disorientation. For a few seconds, I couldn’t remember where I was or how I got there. I didn’t recognize the dark silver sheets, the midnight blue comforter, or the pale wood of the bed. Then, I remembered the previous night’s events. Becoming slightly more lucid, I realized that Christopher’s arm was wrapped around my waist. Turning my head to look at the man I liked, I realized that he was still asleep. I rolled over and kissed his forehead. He moaned, adjusted his position slightly, and said, “Go back to sleep.” I kissed his nose, running my fingers through his hair. He opened his eyes, blinking at the sun’s light pouring through the windows. I kissed his mouth, hands sliding back down over his muscled chest. “What time is it?” he asked, sitting up a bit.
Looking over at the silver clock on his wall, I sat up quickly. “It’s 8:28! Class starts in two minutes!” We both jumped out of bed, looking for our clothes. I quickly pulled on my clothes, finding everything but my underwear. Great. Not only am I wearing the same clothes as yesterday, but now I have no underwear. Turning to Christopher, I asked, “How are we going to get there on time?”
Grinning, he grabbed me and said, “Did you forget already?” I closed my eyes as he used his mind to bring us to a secluded spot close to the classroom.
We rushed into the room, just as the clock read 8:32. Though there is no obvious penalty for tardiness, Dr. Fritz dislikes students that are frequently late. We moved to our seats, trying to get there as quickly as possible to avoid a lecture from Dr. Fritz. Fortunately, someone else ran in a few seconds later, diverting Dr. Fritz’s anger. Leaning over, Kevin whispered, “Is everything ok? You weren’t in your room this morning, and you’re wearing the same clothes as yesterday.”
I nodded, whispering back, “I’ll tell you later.” Turning to listen to Dr. Fritz, my hand bumped Christopher’s under the table. He ran his fingers over mine, sending a shiver down my spine. As I turned back to Kevin, I saw the shock that filled his face. He had seen the physical exchange, seen the way the Christopher had made shiver. I saw him put two and two together. Pain crossed his face, pain that hurt me inside. Kevin was my best friend, the person that I could talk to about anything. He was the person that knew the most about me, that accepted all of my past and my flaws. And I had just hurt him.
Chapter 19
After class, Kevin ran out before I could talk to him. Christopher looked at me questioningly, and I whispered, “He knows. I’m going to go try to talk to him.” Christopher nodded, and I rushed off.
First, I went to Benson Hall, hoping Kevin had gone to his room, but he wasn’t there. I tried the pool hall and the engineering lounge, hoping that he was at one of them. But, he wasn’t. Finally, I tried the coffee shop, the place we’d sat and talked, telling each other everything, everything but the fact that Christopher and I had started seeing each other. He wasn’t there. I had no clue where else he could be. Sad and frustrated, I decided I needed some caffeine to cool my nerves. I grabbed a cup and sat alone at a table. A minute or two later, someone cleared his throat, giving the universal sign that he wanted to sit down.
“Finally! I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” I said turning around to see Phil.
“I’m sorry. Was I supposed to meet you here?” he asked, seeming somewhat confused.
“No. Sorry,” I replied, “I was looking for a friend. Please sit down.” I gestured to the empty seat in front of me. “Something happened with my closest friend, Kevin.” I sighed. “I accidentally hurt him. Badly.”
“I’m sorry. Was it your fault?”
“Yes.”
“Are you in some kind of trouble?”
“No! Why would you think that?” I asked, surprised.
“Nevermind. Usually when people say that they betrayed their friends and that it’s their fault, it’s because they’re in some kind of trouble and are trying to get out of it.” He laughed, shaking his head, “I guess I just watch too many cop shows.”
“I guess so,” I replied, laughing along with him. “They can be addicting.”
“Are you with two guys at once now? I mean, after what happened, I knew you were sneaky and treacherous, but I never thought you’d be the kind to cheat on someone,” Josh interrupted, continuing his trend of being incredibly annoying and butting in at the wrong time.
“What do you want now?” I sighed, turning to face my nightmare ex. I didn’t understand why he just won’t leave me alone to live my life the way I want to, and the accusation that I was with Phil was ridiculous.
“I thought that you wanted a ‘change’,” he said, doing the finger quotes. “I thought that you wanted to be a better person, lead a better life. I hate to break it to you Jules, but becoming a skank is not being a better person.”
“Is this guy bothering you?” Phil asked, standing up and shooting Josh a sharp glance. I’ve never understood the testosterone driven male bravado that always seems to happen when two guys are in the same place.
“I used to bother her in all the right ways,” he said, shooting me a ‘been there, done that’ kind of look. “Now I just laugh at the way she’s fucking up her life.”
“Jules and I are just friends, and you’re being rude,” Phil said, taking a step towards Josh. “I think you should leave now.”
“I’ll leave when Jules tells me what the hell is going on,” he replied, looking angrily between me and Phil.
“It’s none of your business,” I said, standing up. “Phil is a friend of mine, and you are causing a scene. You need to leave me alone. My life no longer concerns you. Get over it.” Turning to Phil, I added, “It was nice talking to you, but I should go now before things get out of hand. Call me sometime and we’ll hang out again.” I walked off, glancing back to make sure Josh was backing off and leaving. He was, which was good because I didn’t want any more violence from the people around me. Between what had happened to Susan and what Christopher was, there was more violence in my life than I ever wanted. So, I turned my back on the threat of more and walked off.
Chapter 20
I returned to my room, wondering what would happen next. I had no clue what I would do, could do without Kevin as my best friend. He was honestly the single person that I trusted with everything. Without him, who would I have? Just Christopher? Despite how I felt about him, he was a vampire. He’d never age. He’d always be 22, always young and gorgeous. His life was so unstable, so violent. I couldn’t live forever with someone like that, someone that needed to hurt others to survive. I sighed at the realization disappointed because we just clicked. He understood me, something that had never really happened before. He’d hurt people and knew how to deal with it, something that I was still working on. He could help me. But, would it be worth it?
I opened the door to my room to see Christopher sitting on my bed, head in his hands. Looking up, he jumped up and grabbed me, pulling my mouth to his. We stood there for seconds, minutes, hours; I lost count, reveling in the feel of his lips on mine. I heard a noise behind me, a combination of shock and pain.
“I knew this would happen. I knew when you first changed your mind about him. I’d always know that I wasn’t the type of guy you went for, but I hoped that you’d open your eyes to see me as more than your best friend. Apparently, I was wasting my time hoping that something would ever happen. I hope the two of you are happy together.” I turned to see Kevin standing there, looking at me with the most painful expression I’d ever seen in my life. And it was my fault.
I broke away from Christopher, going over to where Kevin stood, “You have been my best friend for years. You know everything about me, things I still haven’t told anyone else. You are the one person I trust above all others. I’m sorry I hurt you, but please. I can’t lose you. I can’t lose my best friend again.” I started crying, pleading with Kevin to stay.
He looked over at Christopher, glaring at him until he walked from the room, shutting the door behind him. “You always told me everything? Right,” he said sarc
astically. “When did this start?” he demanded, showing more anger and aggression than I’d ever seen from him before.
Sitting on my bed, I admitted, “Since the Bond movie. That’s when I first realized that I might like him. I never meant for this to happen. You know what happened the last time I started with someone, the last time I was with a guy. You know how it ended. I honestly never thought I’d be able to feel like this again. I’d hoped it would be with you, someone that I already trust. But, it didn’t. For that, I’m sorry. But, please don’t hate me for falling for someone else. I couldn’t bear it.”
Taking a deep breath, he looked at me, “Would you choose my friendship over him?” He closed his eyes, fearing what the answer could be.
I stood up, putting my hand on his shoulder, “Don’t make me choose. I don’t know who I would pick, but I don’t want to lose either of you. Look at me!” I demanded, getting more emotional than I intended to. “You can’t make me choose. You both mean so much to me, and it’s not fair to you or him to try to make me pick one. You knew that eventually I would meet someone, that I would date someone again sometime. I know you hoped it would be you, but it wasn’t. Please don’t punish me because of it.”
He looked at me, seeing my eyes full of pleading and pain, and took a step back. “Just because I accept it, it doesn’t mean I like it. I won’t make you choose because you know how much I still care about you, and I don’t want to cause you more pain than I already have. Just remember that I love you and will always be here for you.” He turned around, putting his hand on the doorknob. “Give me a few days to wrap my head around this, to get used to the idea of you and him. I’ll call you when I’m ready to face it.” He turned the knob, throwing open to door, and walking away. As much as it hurt to see him walk away, I knew that he just needed time.
Christopher was sitting on the floor right outside my door. I walked around to face him, pulling him up and into my room. “We need to talk,” I said, taking a deep breath. “There are some things we should discuss.”
“Agreed,” he said, following me inside.
Chapter 21
“First of all, I don’t know who I would choose. I assume you heard our conversation because, let’s face it, you can do that.” Pushing him onto my bed, I continued. “Second of all, we should talk about Marcus. I want to know who he is and why he’s after you.” I straddled him on my bed, putting my face close to his. “Finally, I want to know why me? Why do you want me of all people?”
“You of all people? What do you mean by that?” he said, touching his lips to mine before pulling away. “You are amazing,” he kissed me lightly, “gorgeous,” he kissed my right cheek, “intelligent,” he kissed my left cheek, “and the first person I’ve felt this way about.” He kissed me passionately, taking away my breath and any doubt that he was the person I wanted to be with, at least for now. I smiled against his lips, letting my questions slide from my mind as he made me feel like I was the only person he’d ever known, ever cared about. And, it felt amazing.
Until Josh threw open my door, looking like he was wanting a fight. “What the hell Jules!” He demanded, “I didn’t understand what happened with you back then, and I sure as hell don’t understand what’s happening now. I don’t know or care who this asshole is, but I deserve to know why what happened did.” I stood, shocked that he would ever go this far, that he would break in the way he did, that he would ever have the balls to demand the truth from me.
Taking a breath to help me find the words, I strode over to Josh and stood in front of him. “You and I were close once. I loved you, and you loved me,” I said, “But then Susan… happened. After that, I couldn’t look at you without thinking about her and it drove me crazy. I distanced myself from everything that reminded me of her. It hurt too much. It changed me as much as it changed you.” Glaring at him, I punched him on the shoulder, “You never used to be an asshole. Now, every time I see you, you’re a bigger and bigger douchebag!”
He stood there for a second, surprised by my outburst, before retaliating. He grabbed me around the waist, pressing his lips to mine. Furious, I pushed him off, slapping him on the face. “I sure as hell don’t feel that way about you anymore and never will again! I’m with Christopher now, and you need to get over it.” I gestured, looking over my shoulder to find that Christopher had risen and come over to my side. The look of anger on his face was enough to make plants wither and die. Fury radiated from him, and I was briefly scared before remembering where it was focused. “Look,” I said quietly. “We can try being friends again if you promise to stop being such a dick.”
“You heard what she said,” Christopher growled, “I’ll give you a free pass for that kiss, but if you come near her again, I will hurt you.” He sounded so deadly serious that it scared me. I knew he was a killer, but I’d never seen anything to convince me that he could be one again. The way he looked and talked to Josh made me certain that, if Josh came near me again, he might not survive the encounter.
“I don’t care that you’re her new boy toy; you can’t talk to me like that.” Josh retaliated, “I don’t respond well to threats.” Had Christopher been human, it would have been a fair fight. However, Christopher’s lack of mortality would leave Josh badly hurt or worse. I had to stop the impending fight.
“Josh. This is Christopher. I like him, and you need to get over it, over everything that happened. I don’t want to see you again.” Defeated, I was able to push him out of the room. “And if you ever break into my room again, you had better knock first.” Slamming the door on him, I turned the lock and wheeled around to face Christopher.
Chapter 22
“What the hell was that?” I demanded.
“I know,” he replied, “that guy was way out of line.”
Shaking my head with my back to him, I said, “I wasn’t talking about him. I understand that you have to do the guy thing and show dominance when you feel threatened, but I don’t give a shit about him. The way you acted was worse than what he did.”
“But-“ he tried to interject.
“Your threat was unacceptable. Unlike most people that say similar things, you could actually follow through. I accept what you are, but if you act like an animal, I’ll treat you as one. I’d kick you out, but Josh is there. So, I’m leaving instead. I need some time to think. Teleport out of here and think about what happened and why it’s never going to happen again.”
“But-“ he tried again, but I wasn’t having it.
I turned around, a resolved look in my eye, “If you try to push this, it will not end well for you. I need some time alone. Do that mental trick and go back to your place. Now.” Turning, I unlocked the door and strode out without checking to see if he’d followed my directions or not.
I walked to Denison Hall, the site of all labs. A bio lab was just what I needed to take my mind off the day’s complications. I had lab for my Genetic class in about half an hour, but the prof always got there early for students that wanted to start early. I’d never been one of them, never seen a reason to go to lab early, but I needed something else to focus on.
Fortunately, this week’s work required focus. We were running an ELISA assay on the contents of a pig liver, looking for certain enzymes. It was definitely one of the most interactive and fun labs we’d done up ‘til that point. It was both a good thing and a bad thing that I dominate at labs since I finished with an hour still left to go.
Still unsure about what I should do, I dashed back to my room to grab my sneakers. There was a three mile hiking trail pretty close to campus, so I decided to go for a walk, hoping to sort through some things. After the three miles, I was no closer to resolving anything, so I decided to do another lap.
And another.
And another.
After walking around a wooded circle for four hours with no human contact, I was finally ready to go back to my dorm. The sun had barely begun to set, but the air had started to chill, making it less pleasant than it had been.
As I got to the trail head, I saw someone I recognized. “Kevin!” I called out with relief, running towards him. “Hey. What’s-“ I stopped, seeing the expression on his face. He looked completely shocked, worse than when he’d realized that Christopher and I were together. “What happened? What’s wrong?”
Chapter 23
“Josh-“ he cleared his throat. “Josh is dead. He was killed over by the pool. No one saw it, but some of the swim team found him in the parking lot after practice.” I took a step back, realizing what had happened. “I knew you’d probably be here after what happened earlier. You come here when you’re frustrated and need to think. I thought you’d want to know since the two of you were close years ago.” All that I could think was Christopher did it. He said he’d kill Josh and he did. I shouldn’t have kicked him out when he was so angry.
“Holy shit,” I sank down to the ground, “It’s all my fault.” I knew that he had the ability to, that he could kill. I just didn’t think he would. Standing up, I turned to Kevin, “Thanks for telling me. I promise that I’ll explain it to you sometime, but I really have to go.” I started walking towards campus, towards the site of my ex’s murder.
Blood Delirium (Blood Trance Book 1) Page 6
