He finally had to pull back for air. “You know I never would have tickled you,” he said. “I’d never do anything you wouldn’t want me to.”
“I don’t do anything I don’t want to do.” She pulled him toward her again. “Not for as long as I can remember.”
They slipped into a deep cave that was all their own. No one bothered them, no one intruded. There was nothing but the desires raging in their souls. Her hands were all over him as if she could drink him through her touch and when they parted for air, he looked into her eyes, now like chocolate kisses floating in vanilla ice cream. There was no need to guess at her feelings; her hungers were as strong as his own.
She drew closer to him, putting a smooth, firm leg between his. “Your fingers aren’t the only things that speak with feeling,” she said, her voice husky and raw.
“That’s cruel.” He wanted to devour her with his lips, to explore every inch of her with his hands; to own her, to have her, to be one with her. But he pulled back.
“Are you sure this is what you want to do?” he asked.
“I told you. I don’t do anything I don’t want to do.”
“But…” He sat up, trying to make his befuddled brain work. “I wasn’t planning on this. I didn’t bring anything.”
She frowned. “What should you have brought? Your teddy bear?”
“You know. Protection.”
She laughed, the sound softening the shadows of the room and firing up his desire once more. “I think I have some condoms. They might be a little old, but they don’t spoil, do they?”
She got to her feet and pulled him to his. Ollie lifted his head slightly from where he was sleeping when they passed the kitchen door, but then settled back down as she and Jack went along the hallway to a bedroom that was somehow sparse but filled with her personality. She dug in the back of a linen closet and found a partial box of condoms, which was their only concession to practicality.
Once loose in the semidarkness of the bedroom, passion ruled. In a fevered heat, they undressed each other, clutching at chances to kiss, to caress, to feed the hungers that could not wait for the slow passage of a shirt being removed. It was like they’d never known lovemaking. Like the fires that raged in their hearts were out of control. Like their desperate needs could only be answered by each other and only at this moment.
There was a bit of awkward fumbling at first, but desire overrode their lack of familiarity and then all inhibitions dropped away. He carefully entered her, trying not to hurt her, trying to be gentle. But her legs grasped him hungrily, pulling him within her.
“I ain’t made for breaking,” she whispered in his ear.
And like a wild beast unchained, he mounted her, plunging into the paradise that was Cassie. He went deeper and deeper. Her legs and her fingers grasped him, bringing forth that mixture of pain and pleasure that only the deepest desire could evoke.
The pleasure climbed higher and higher. They were racing toward the heavens themselves. And then, just before their hearts would burst, they clung together and exploded into the stars. They floated there for a moment—a long, precious moment—then slowly floated back down to earth.
They lay in each other’s arms for half an eternity, waiting to be able to breathe, waiting for their hearts to settle. He was afraid to speak. He was afraid it would break the preciousness that lay between them.
“Oh, baby,” she whispered.
“Thank you,” he replied.
They had been on a long journey and could again feel the earth beneath their feet. Nothing was changed, everything was changed. Neither wanted to let go. Jack didn’t. And Cassie didn’t seem to. He was so happy that he could laugh and cry at the same time.
Cassie lay in Jack’s arms, in that netherworld halfway between dreams and reality. It was so pleasant there, like lying on a cloud. From Jack’s even breathing, she guessed he was dozing. She felt ready to curl up herself; just nod off and sleep until their passions awoke them. But instead she stirred and pushed herself up on one elbow.
His eyes flickered for a moment, then opened wide. His smile was totally satisfied. “Hi, beautiful,” he said softly.
“You seen an eye doctor lately?” she asked.
“Why?”
Cassie ran her fingers through the mess on her head. “I’m afraid I’m a bit disheveled.”
“Disheveled is good.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Well, it depends on how you got disheveled.” He rolled over, putting his arms around her waist and his head on her stomach. “And a body couldn’t get it better than you did.”
She kissed the top of his head.
“I have to get going,” he said.
“I know.”
He’d only been on loan, not hers to keep. She watched as he got to his feet, gathered up his clothes and went into the bathroom. Once the door was closed behind him, cutting off the light, she rolled over onto her back and stared through the dark at the ceiling.
It had been wonderful to have him here. He’d made her feel all woman; there were no traces of her gloom left after seeing Ron and his child. She was fine as she was. More than fine when Jack was around. She closed her eyes and let the warmth of his love surround her once more.
“Cass?”
She opened her eyes. Jack was dressed, sitting on the edge of the bed with a frown the size of Indiana on his lips.
“What’s the matter?”
“The condom split.”
She smiled at him, at his worries. “That’s okay. We didn’t really need it anyway.” She wanted to tell him about her problem, but just couldn’t. She just couldn’t bring a shadow into their perfect evening.
“You sure?”
She reached for his hand and brought it to her lips. “Positive.”
He leaned over to kiss her lips one last time, then with visible reluctance he pulled away. “Sleep tight,” he whispered. “I’ll give you a call tomorrow.”
“Yeah.” She yawned, then reality started slipping back. “Oh, wait. I’ll be gone all day tomorrow, I’m going into Chicago for a closeout sale at one of my suppliers!”
“Give me a call when you get back, then,” he said. “Let me know you got home all right.”
She shrugged, then realized he probably couldn’t see it in the dim light. “It’ll probably be late,”
“I’m a big boy, I’ll be up.” He kissed her again and then was gone, but the touch of his lips on hers lingered like the promise of sweet dreams in the night.
With a soft smile on her face, she rolled over and went to sleep.
Chapter Eight
Cassie looked at her watch and sighed. She had only a half hour before she was supposed to meet Burt and hadn’t covered even a third of the aisles she was supposed to. She would like to tell herself that it was because the plumbing warehouse’s closeout sale had too many things she was considering buying, but knew that wasn’t quite the case. Her list had barely a dozen items on it.
It was more because of a certain tall ex-football player who seemed to charge into her thoughts at the slightest provocation. She couldn’t believe how stupid she’d been last night, how weak and pitiful she’d been. Just because seeing Ron had thrown her for a loop, she’d practically begged Jack to stay the night.
Where had her courage been? What about her common sense? She needed to stay clear of relationships—not throw herself into them headfirst.
She stopped to look at some ceramic pedestal vanities. They were used, but seemed to be in good condition. A lot of rehabbers were looking for things like this. Jack might even—
No. She was not going to turn every business thought into one of Jack. She was not some moony young thing.
“Hey, Cassie. How are you?”
She turned and saw Lou Macri, the owner of the warehouse, hurrying toward her. “Hi, Lou,” she said. “Sorry to hear you guys are closing up shop. Hope we can take a number of things off your hands.”
“You name it and it’s yours,�
� he told her. “We need more like you in the business. Fair. Up-front. Honest.”
How honest had she been with Jack on Sunday night? She’d used him to soothe her shattered ego. But was he thinking they’d started some grand romance?
“I was hoping we could have lunch,” Lou was saying.
“Ah, I—”
“Yeah, I know,” he said with a laugh. “A pretty girl like you has more boyfriends than you can shake a stick at. You don’t want to waste your time with a married man who has eight grandkids.”
“Lou,” Cassie protested. “Going to lunch with you would not be a waste of time.”
“Sure, sure.” Then he hugged her again. “Hey, you ever in Florida, you come see us. Martha and me, we got ourselves a little place in Naples.” He patted her back as he stepped away. “But it ain’t too small. Got a couple of extra bedrooms for friends.”
“Count me in,” Cassie said before Lou sprinted off to greet another customer friend. See? She had lots of friends. Lots of places to go, things to do. She didn’t need to cling to a certain ex-jock. A stinging behind her eyes contradicted her.
Cassie shook her head sharply. Damn, she was in a teary mood today. And she didn’t have a practice or game or anything tonight. No softball. No soccer. Nothing. Not even swimming lessons for Jack’s twins.
Double damn. No matter which way she turned, that guy was sitting in her brain. Clenching her jaw tight, Cassie forced her feet down the aisle. There was no reason for her to let a onenight stand discombobulate her like it had.
Yes, she and Jack had made love to each other. They’d had sex. It had been exciting. It had been great. But there was no reason for her to act like a fifth grader after her first kiss. They were adults. And adults didn’t act like children. No matter how much they wanted to.
What she really didn’t like was how Jack was dominating her thoughts. He was like Godzilla sitting in the back of her mind. That could not go on.
She still had a business to run. She still had her sports teams to play with. She still had a life of her own. And she needed to keep it that way. If anything, that was certainly something she should have learned from the disaster that had been her marriage. Make someone else the focus of your life and you were in deep trouble.
“Hey, Cassie. How you be?”
“Hi, Marty,” Cassie replied. Marty Daniels owned a plumbing-supply store in Kouts, Indiana, and had a family of four boys. “How’s the family?”
“Eating me out of house and home,” the thin, balding man answered with a laugh. “And how’s that big mutt of yours?”
“I think he’s stopped growing,” Cassie said. “But he eats enough to feed a pack of wolves.”
“Maybe you just ought to turn him loose. A beast that big can kill his own dinner real easy.”
“I’ll think on it,” Cassie said as they parted.
Yes, she’d think on Ollie. She’d think on her business. She’d think on her sports teams. She’d think on her family. She’d think on all the damn pieces of her life—on everything but an ex-football player and his blown-out knee. Although that was the only thing in his body that wasn’t perfect.
She growled through her tightly closed teeth. Damn it, she was still doing it.
It wasn’t like she objected to giving Jack a piece of her thoughts, but that was all. They’d only spent that one night together, for heaven’s sake. It wasn’t like they’d pledged their troth to each other. He might be the marrying kind, but she sure as heck wasn’t.
“Hey, boss lady. Thought you got lost.”
She spun around, blinking at Burt and his frowning face. “No,” Cassie said, looking at her list. “I still have a few aisles to look at. Did you find much in your half?”
“A few things.”
She glanced at his list, then ripped off hers to go with it. “Why don’t you settle up with Lou for this stuff while I run through the last few aisles?”
“Sounds good.”
Cassie hurried through the rest of the warehouse, determinedly adding a few more items before meeting Lou and Burt at the front of the building. They got the truck loaded amid cheerful bantering that left no room for moping. Then there was nothing left but the drive home.
She had to get things back under her control, she told herself over and over again as she sped along the tollway. She had to stop all this moping and crazy dreaming, she admonished silently as she got off at the South Bend exit. She would have to make it clear that last night had been a onetime thing, she vowed as she pulled into the store parking lot.
By the time Cassie was driving home, she was feeling good. Feeling determined. Feeling strong. She could pull herself away from Jack. No problem.
Ollie greeted Cassie effusively when she stepped in the door, letting her scratch his ears. Then, tiring of that mushy stuff, he ran to get his leash. Apparently his energy level was on high.
“Hey,” Cassie said. “I take it you missed me a whole lot.”
He wagged his tail in agreement and Cassie realized how much she loved the big guy. She always knew where he stood. He didn’t have mood swings, nor would he walk out on her. She put his leash on and they went outside.
“Jack said to call him as soon as I got in,” Cassie said.
Ollie stopped as he checked out the scents on a clump of evergreen bushes.
“Like who made him boss, huh?” It would be a good place to start asserting herself.
Her dog grinned at her as he added his two cents to the string of messages that the neighborhood dogs had “engraved” on the bushes.
“I’ve been taking care of business for a long time now,” she said as they moved to the next message station, a young locust tree in the parkway. “And I imagine I’m going to keep on doing that for an even longer time.”
They reached the end of the block and Cassie turned around to head back home.
“So I don’t think I’m going to call him tonight.” She pulled on the leash to settle Ollie into a more sedate walk by her side. “No use starting something that’ll just bring us all problems. It’ll be better for everyone if we just leave things the way they are.”
“Daddy’s still grumpy.”
Jack gave Mary Alice what he hoped was a properly stern look.
“I know,” Mary Louise said. “Just like he was last night.”
“I wasn’t grumpy last night,” Jack said. Maybe a little concerned since Cassie hadn’t called, but that was all. “And I’m not grumpy this morning.”
“Are too,” the twins chorused, as they stuffed waffles into their mouths.
He wanted to shout “Am not!” but he knew better. His daughters were “Are too/Am not” professionals. Tournament champion material. There was no way he could compete.
“Eat your breakfast,” he said, turning his attention to the paper before him. Cassie hadn’t gotten in all that late last night—he’d seen lights on in her house by nine. So why hadn’t she bothered to call?
Jack stared at the paper and tried to make sense of the ink spots on the white background. And he would have if it wasn’t for the snickering that erupted.
“Girls.” Aunt Hattie turned from the sink where she was rinsing off some dishes. “Settle down, please.”
“Daddy’s got his paper upside down,” Mary Louise said.
“You can’t read that way,” Mary Alice added.
Jack squinted his eyes as he focused on the newspaper before him. Damn. No wonder he couldn’t read the stupid articles.
The snickering turned into laughter. Jack just sighed and turned his paper over.
“Clean off your plates,” Aunt Hattie said. “Then go upstairs and get dressed.”
Jack watched glumly as his daughters did as they were told. If it weren’t for his aunt, his kids wouldn’t have a clue as to what adult authority meant. They gave him a syrup-sticky kiss before skipping off to their rooms. He sighed.
“You’ve got to quit arguing with them, Jimmy Jack. You’re the father. And a father’s word should
be the law.”
“I know.”
“Although, I’ll grant you, it is hard for a man to raise little girls. Girls need a woman’s hand. Someone who won’t be taken in by their little tricks.”
Jack felt a heaviness around his heart. They’d had this conversation before. It was Aunt Hattie in her caretaker role— someone sitting in until he got things sorted out permanently. Except he didn’t expect things to change.
“How’s your young lady?” Aunt Hattie asked. “She feeling better?”
How would he know? He hadn’t talked to her since Sunday night. Or rather, yesterday morning. “Fine, I’m sure.”
“She suits you well,” his aunt said, turning from the sink and wiping her hands on a dishcloth. “Right well.”
“We’re just good friends, Aunt Hattie.”
His aunt snorted in an all-knowing, old-woman way. “If the Lord wanted men and women to be friends, he would have taught women how to spit, throw a baseball, and aim when they peed.”
“Cassie can throw a ball as well as I can,” he said and got to his feet. “I have to get to work. See you tonight.”
“You’re getting up on that high horse again, Jimmy Jack,” she called after him as he sped out the door. “Ain’t nobody won a lady’s hand by letting their pride get in the way.”
Who said he was trying to win Cassie’s hand? he asked himself as he pulled the minivan out of the garage. Neither of them was looking for something permanent. And didn’t he have the right to be a little miffed that she hadn’t called? She’d said she would. He frowned at the traffic ahead of him. At least, he was pretty sure she had.
But Aunt Hattie was right about what she called his “high horse.” He ought to find out what had really happened before he jumped to conclusions. He turned at the next corner and headed downtown. Her truck was in the store parking lot.
Jack parked his minivan and dropped to the ground, working on finding a smile. He needed to learn not to take everything so personally. Hell, she probably had a real good reason for not calling.
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