Fleeing Isandor had still been an option. He could have climbed down the web of stairs to ground level, then struck out of the city with nothing but the clothes on his back and the baked goods stolen from Camilla. For a long time, Hasryan had considered it. He had stood at Carrington’s Square, where they had tried to hang him, where an unexpected friend had saved him, and he’d thought to flee. The cold night wind buffeted him. Blood ran down his leg. He should leave, he knew. It would be safer.
It would be lonely.
And staring at the small hole through which the Sapphire Guard had sought to push him, reflecting on the life he’d built in Isandor, he realized he was trapped. Locked in the city, as surely as if they had him in a cell. It didn’t matter if his partnership with Brune lay shattered in a thousand pieces, if Larryn resented his profession and his secrets, or if Cal hadn’t even tried to save him from death. He couldn’t leave. He didn’t have the strength to start from scratch, not anymore, especially not without Arathiel. Isandor was his home now, and Lady Camilla’s quarters were the only place safe for him. He would stay there for however long this lull of peace lasted.
Hasryan pushed the blankets off himself. His memory of the previous night became fuzzy after that. He’d returned to Camilla’s, his limp growing as more blood trickled out of his cut. Brune’s men hadn’t inflicted a deep wound—nothing he wouldn’t overcome within two days—but in the lightheadedness that had followed, the weight of his decision had hit him hard. By the time he’d reached the Dathirii’s tree-shaped Tower and Camilla’s private door, he had turned into a shaky mess. He flushed at the memory, from shame and more than a bit of gratitude. She’d opened the door for him, and he’d fallen into her arms, weeping.
He had lost control. It unnerved him, how easily Camilla could reach past defences set up through the years, how comfortable he felt around her. Not many could do that. Arathiel had shared his struggles, prompting a natural understanding, but Camilla and Hasryan had nothing in common. He couldn’t explain this casual proximity, and it made him wary of his own reactions. He would have to be more careful and establish clear boundaries.
A good first step would be to find his pants. Camilla had removed them to treat his wound, leaving him in nothing but tight red underwear. They used to be his favourites—the lucky ones, he would call them, before teasing Cal for a blessing—but that didn’t mean he wanted to parade in them in front of an aging elven lady. All he found after a quick scan of his surroundings was his shirt. Lady Camilla was humming a melody from the nearby living room. At times, he heard the delicate clink of a teacup being put down. Hasryan couldn’t help but smile. Of course she had tea. Perhaps she had his pants, too.
Carefully, he slid down the bed and set his weight on his wounded leg. He winced at the pain and sat, steadying his heart as much as his body. Hasryan hated to rely on anyone. He had left in a fit of panic, convincing himself he would rather strike out alone than depend on Camilla. He knew better now—not that it made his situation any easier. But, well, Hasryan had seen his share of hardships. He could deal. He always did. His resolve hardening, Hasryan limped his way across the room, still wearing nothing but underwear.
Lady Camilla sat in a comfy chair, a kit of strings and needles on the small table in front of her. She held his pants and was sewing the bloodied rip with obvious practice. Hasryan stared, allowing the sight to sink in. She was repairing his pants. First she had tended to his wounds, and now she was stitching his pants. Why did she put so much effort into helping him? A grazed leg wouldn’t have killed him. She should have let it go. Hasryan cleared his throat to draw her attention, but he didn’t know what to say. This was too weird. She smiled.
“I knew you were there, dear,” she said without looking up from her work. “Are you certain you should stand on your leg so soon?”
“It’s nothing. I’ve had worse.”
“I noticed.”
This time her gaze did leave his pants to trail over the many scars crisscrossing his skin—chest, arms, and face alike. The intense sadness in her eyes scared him. He wanted to go over and shake her, to tell her he’d gotten most of these trying to kill people—and succeeding. Not all, of course. Some came from beatings triggered by his dark elven heritage; others had been earned during his years surviving the wild as a kid. Most important of all, however, was the slim scar that ran across his throat, stopping under his chin. Given by his mother. Sometimes he wondered what she regretted the most upon dying: trying to kill him, or failing?
“They’re nothing,” he told Camilla. “A series of misadventures.”
That’s what he would call people’s attempts to murder him from now on. Misadventures.
“They started early.”
“You have no idea.” His fingers reached for his neck, but he stopped himself. He didn’t want her to notice if she hadn’t yet. She already worried too much. “I can repair the pants myself.”
Camilla laughed and shook her head. “I’m almost done, it’s fine. Do you need a cane? I take care of Isandor’s elderly and have gathered many spares through the years.”
Hasryan tried to picture himself leaning on a cane, and a slight smile curved his lips. Maybe he could make it work—find black and white outfits, build a classy style. Larryn would never let him hear the end of it. Or … well, he would need to know about it, first. Hasryan’s mirth vanished. Larryn wanted nothing to do with him. He had abandoned Hasryan in prison, fleeing when he’d learned about the assassinations. Another lost friend. It cut deep, that betrayal, more than Hasryan cared to reflect upon. He had always thought he could count on Larryn, even if only as one of the Shelter’s flock. It seemed he had been wrong.
“I’ll manage.” His voice rough, he made his way across the room and threw himself into the sofa. He ought to thank Camilla, but the words flitted out of his grasp. How could he? Since Arathiel had removed the rope from his neck, Hasryan had stepped into this strange, inexplicable universe where he could safely lounge on an old lady’s couch with nothing on but his tight underwear. Not for the first time, he wished his saviour could see him. When the thought had first occurred to him two days ago, he had voiced it with a smirk.
“Will Arathiel not come to enjoy my illustrious presence?” he’d said.
“He can’t.” Camilla’s calm and pleasant tone had given him no warning of what followed. “They arrested him.”
The words had smashed Hasryan’s breath away. He had straightened up, horrified. Even now, thinking of it, Hasryan’s heart sped and twisted. “We need to get him out.”
In an instant, his mind had revised everything he knew about the Sapphire Guard’s headquarters. How to enter, where they kept the keys, how frequently they changed shifts. There had to be something he could do. Camilla had rested kind eyes on him and shaken her head.
“If you get caught, we will be back at the beginning, except he’ll share your rope.”
Hasryan had wondered if that would kill him. Did Arathiel need to breathe? How much of him was still human? No, that was wrong. Hasryan wrenched his thoughts away from that pattern—from thinking of Arathiel and his body as separate entities. They were the same, and Arathiel was a kind soul, with hopes and fears and compassion that exceeded any Hasryan had met. Arathiel had saved him, carving himself a special space in his heart. And wasn’t he also Camilla’s friend? They couldn’t let him rot in a cell.
“Then you do something!” he’d exclaimed. “You’re a noble! The Dathirii have influence. What’s the point of a fancy title if you can’t make this right?”
Camilla had started shaking her head before he finished. “Officially, my relationship with Arathiel was limited to the sharing of infrequent afternoon tea and a promise of help should he choose to return to House Brasten. If I push to free him, I imply there is more. I already caused a distraction among the guards to facilitate his approach on the day of your execution. I do not dare get involved further. Sora would connect the coincidences.”
She would. H
asryan had learned how acute Sora’s instincts and logic were. She would understand the pattern if given the chance. And no matter how often she’d told him she would rather not hang him, she had still put him at the end of that rope.
One from which Arathiel had saved him, risking his life and getting captured in the process. One thing Camilla had said still bothered Hasryan, even two days later.
“So he’s a noble? He has family here—House Brasten?” Arathiel had never talked about it.
“By the divines, he didn’t explain anything to you, did he?”
Hasryan bristled. She made it sound like a lack of trust. “We don’t ask. We take people as they are. Arathiel was himself, and we didn’t need titles to appreciate him.”
“But it is a part of who he is,” Camilla said. “He may not share, but the grief he carries from that time impacts him.” She inspected her handiwork, then snapped the sewing thread with a satisfied smile and threw the pants at Hasryan. “His full name is Lord Arathiel Brasten. He was their weapon master, a little over a century ago.”
Hasryan almost choked. “A century?”
His family would be dead, then. No wonder he avoided the topic.
“Yes,” Camilla said. “For a hundred thirty years, he was gone. His sister was very sick, so he left in search of the Well, a magical place reputed to cure everything. Back then, wild tales about it flew all around Isandor. Most agreed one should travel north, though no one truly knew what to look for. I never dared prompt Arathiel for what he’d found, in the end.”
Hasryan craved more details, but it would be unfair to Arathiel. They did not ask, he’d said a moment earlier. He didn’t need to know.
Larryn would have wanted to, though. A bitter snicker escaped Hasryan. “He’s a noble. Larryn will tear him to pieces when he learns.”
Hasryan slipped his pants on, careful not to worsen his wound. As he tied the belt around his waist, he noticed the worried frown on Camilla’s thin features. “Nothing angers Larryn more than a noble abusing a resource not meant for him. The Shelter, where Arathiel was staying, is a haven for homeless folks. It doesn’t cater to oblivious jerks who feast every night and just want to try out the cooking.”
“I hardly think that is a proper way to describe Arathiel.”
Hasryan raised his hand and shrugged. “I know. He saved my ass, I’m not about to forget.” He’d done that, and so much more. “Larryn’s another matter, though.”
He didn’t handle shades of grey very well. He had run away as soon as Hasryan had admitted to the assassinations. One moment, they were best friends; the next, Larryn was terrified of him. Hasryan couldn’t even blame him—it had happened too often before. Camilla would be the same if she learned how many he’d killed. She could offer him all the cookies in the world, or brew the best tea, or fix every piece of clothing he’d ever owned. It wouldn’t change anything. If she knew, she would return him to the city guards faster than he could put his pants on.
“So … what now?” he asked.
“What do you mean?”
“I can’t stay here forever!”
“Forever?” Camilla laughed and shook her head. “Must it always be absolutes with you? You can stay here as long as you like.”
“I don’t like it.” A lie. He loved it, and the more he did, the stronger his fear of losing it became. He would rather leave on his own terms. But not now, not if it meant starting over.
“As long as you must, then.”
“Look, lady, you’re nice, but this is just another prison. A sweet-ass deluxe prison, but a prison anyway. I’m stuck here. Everybody out there hates me. I need some sort of plan! I can’t spend my life trapped, eating your cookies and drinking your tea.”
“Wouldn’t that be fantastic, though?” She winked at him, chuckled at his horrified expression. “I jest. Of course you cannot stay here forever. Arathiel and I had hoped to dig through Brune’s activities and unearth what we could, with your help and input, but I am afraid such plans must be delayed. House Dathirii has an entire enclave of Myrians to fight, and Arathiel is detained. I understand you want an answer, Hasryan, but I know very little of what should come next. The truth is, I would love to speak with my nephew—Lord Dathirii—about this. About you. I trust him. My life is not the one on the line, however, and we will not approach anyone you don’t trust.”
Fear squeezed Hasryan’s heart at the mention of Lord Dathirii. His muscles went taut, ready to spring on her, as if he needed to stop her from reaching to the elf immediately. Despite her reassurances he would always have the final word on whom they spoke with, Hasryan’s swirling panic didn’t lessen. She will betray you, a voice inside repeated, again and again. A reliable advisor, that instinct.
“I don’t even trust you,” he said.
Camilla tilted her head to the side with a saddened expression. She pressed her lips together and leaned forward over the centre table between their respective seats. The moment she set her wrinkled fingers on his hand, he snatched it away. She held his knee instead.
“It doesn’t matter. I trust you.”
She stood, picked up her sewing kit, and headed back into her room. Hasryan looked out the window and stared at the city, shadowed by the Dathirii Tower. Outside, people went on their daily business. They had friends and families, and their lives rolled by without his string of betrayals and fights. They were free—of crimes and prejudice alike. Would he ever be one of them? Hasryan brought one leg back to his torso, leaving the wounded one stretched out. He’d tried so hard to build a normal life, only to be pushed back to the edges again.
He missed Larryn and the Shelter. They welcomed everyone, and for a while Hasryan had found his place there. A home, with lively music, amazing food, and friends. And despite his previous resolution to stop thinking about Larryn, his mind drifted back to the tiny refuge nestled at the bottom of Isandor, in the deepest layer of the Lower City, where the best people hid under the city’s filth.
When Vellien stepped into the Shelter for the second time, everyone was awake. Patrons lifted their heads to glare at them, dirty fingers curled around bowls of warm soup, their clothes ragged, thin, and full of holes. Without the fire, those inside would freeze, and their lack of proper winter garments made Vellien self-conscious about the thick fur cloak on their back. Larryn had scolded them about it on their first visit, and the young owner of the Shelter would no doubt do it again today. Vellien swallowed hard, their cheeks flushing red with guilt and shame—a sure-fire way to make their freckles stand out even more than usual. They wished everyone would go back to their conversations, but instead the patrons stared at Vellien as they picked their way through the tables. This much attention made them want to recoil and run, but Nevian still needed a healer’s help for his mind, and they wouldn’t abandon the grumpy teen because of a few hard looks.
Being in the Shelter was always a little difficult. Few places made them feel like they didn’t belong and were not welcome. At first it had been profoundly disturbing, but although Vellien struggled to accept it, they understood. Few establishments dared to outright shun nobles, to so clearly expose they were unwanted. Larryn didn’t care about the risks involved. His place had been built by homeless folks, for homeless folks. When Vellien stepped inside, they disturbed the Shelter’s status as a haven for Lower City residents where those without means could always grab a meal and find a warm corner to sleep. The first time, Vellien had been unaware of how their arrival would be perceived. It was the middle of the night, a teenager was dying, and their Aunt Camilla had asked them to help however they could. They’d strode in without considering the impact of their presence and quickly slammed into the wall of bitter indignation that was Larryn.
Now Vellien knew what awaited them. Anxiety built in their stomach as they approached the door on the other side of the common room. The Shelter lay nestled between two towers, at the very bottom of the Lower City and Larryn had somehow gathered the funds to buy one of their ground floors. He kept
his kitchens there, along with several private rooms for paying customers or disabled residents in need. Nevian had been granted one of them, which meant Vellien had to stride past the kitchen door to get to their patient. They doubted the Shelter’s owner would’ve missed the sudden silence in his common room, or that he wouldn’t come out to investigate. Vellien struggled to control their rising stress, but by the time they pushed through the door, their hands shook.
As expected, Larryn waited for them, arms crossed and scowling, blocking the corridor.
“You returned.”
Vellien’s courage shrivelled inside. Larryn’s strangely calm tone didn’t mask the anger in his eyes. They didn’t want any trouble, or an argument. They just wanted to heal Nevian’s mind, help him recover his memories, and finally talk to the teenager they had saved.
“I-I … yes. I’m sorry.” Vellien cleared their throat. They couldn’t even meet Larryn’s gaze. Vellien fumbled with the clasp of their cloak and removed it. With a glance up, they extended it forward, like a peace offering. “Here. It-it’s for you. For everyone.”
Silence stretched, and to Vellien it seemed to last forever. They almost dropped the cloak, as they had on their first night in the Shelter, but Larryn snatched it away with a laugh. A laugh! Excited relief surged through Vellien and they smiled.
“Does he need you?” Larryn asked.
“Nevian? I wish he didn’t. N-not because I hate coming here or anything like that! I didn’t mean to imply that, I swear. I am scared at how damaged his memories are. It’s a lot of work. But I don’t mind! It’s just sad—”
“Stop.” Larryn raised a hand. “I get it. You’re selfless and worried about his well-being or whatever. I don’t care. All I want to know is how often I should expect your prissy noble ass to grace us with its presence.”
“I-I have no idea.” Vellien hated how Larryn put them on edge. Not that it was all that hard: Vellien didn’t deal well with aggressive people. But this was different because they knew part of his anger was justified. Misdirected, perhaps, but not baseless. Vellien needed to hold their end, however. Hopefully, if Larryn had accepted the cloak, it meant he was in a better mood than the other night. “As often as Nevian needs it.”
City of Betrayal Page 2
