by Moore, E. M.
She clutched my wrists. “And this is who I am, Simon. I don’t want to be here. I don’t know what I was thinking before. You kidnapped me. You tortured me. Still somehow, through all that, I let it go.” A tear ran down her face. “But I just can’t do it anymore, Simon. We’re not from the same world, and I’m not going to stay here and watch you continue to be you when the very thought of it sickens me.”
“Sickens you? You don’t mind when my cock is buried so deep in your pussy you can’t think straight, but the moment you see something you don’t like, you don’t want to be here anymore? If that’s not hypocritical, I don’t know what is.”
“Don’t pretend like you care,” she said, throwing the words at me. “You’ve never given me any reason to believe you actually do. The only reason why you even took me is to get revenge, and you can’t get it anymore because my grandfather doesn’t care. You don’t need me anymore, so let me go.”
“No,” I bellowed.
“I’m not staying.”
She ripped her chin from my grip. My nails cut through her skin leaving deep scratches. She turned to make her way out the door, but I was right there. I twisted her around and pinned her against the door. Need pulsed through me. She wasn’t going anywhere.
I covered her mouth with my own, kissing her like we had back on the train. Emotions swam through me, each of them bumping against one another as if I didn’t know what to think at all.
I wanted Delilah. I couldn’t deny it any longer. But how? Why? And for what purpose?
I tasted blood. I pulled back to see that some of the blood from the scratch on her chin had smeared on her face while we kissed. I licked her, and she trembled. I did it again, and she sighed. “Don’t deny that you want me.”
Her hips circled against mine, and we both groaned in need. “I’m not,” she said. I moved forward, licking her wounds until the blood stopped flowing. Then I kissed my way down her neck, pulling down the collar of her shirt to kiss the very tip of her shoulder.
Her hand reached out and cupped me through my jeans. I ground against her. “You’re staying.”
“No.”
I growled, then bit her neck. I pulled long swallows of her sweet draught from her body, reveling in its taste. It made my body tingle. She worked me through my jeans until I meticulously undressed her from the waist down. She fumbled with my own pants, so I moved her hands out of the way and pushed them to the floor along with my boxers until there was nothing between us physically. Mentally, there were a thousand barriers, but we’d never had a physical one. Even when I was supposed to be torturing her for her grandfather’s sins, I ended up torturing her for the sensual pleasure of it. And she loved it too. She could deny it all she wanted, but she loved the pleasure pain I put her through. Maybe that was her problem, and why she wanted to leave. She didn’t want to be that kind of person, but she hadn’t realized she was already that person.
I pinned her against the door and slid inside her warmth. “This isn’t going to be pretty,” I warned.
She cried out as I started to pound inside her. Already, I could feel her slipping away. She didn’t know she was already too much like me to go back, but I couldn’t make her see it either. She had to get there all by herself. Shit. I stumbled as when I came to the realization. Even though I was straining inside her, as soon as this was over, I would let her leave if she wanted to. I couldn’t keep her against her will. Maybe I’d changed too much.
“Fuck, Simon!”
I didn’t relent. If this was the last time I was going to be buried inside her, it was going to be memorable.
I wound my hand around her hip and then between us. She trembled as I started playing with her clit as I fucked her. She tried to move my hand out of the way, but I didn’t let her. “Too much,” she said.
It was never too much.
Her hair fell in front of her face and cascaded down her shirt. It was like silky raven feathers, swishing with my strokes.
Keeping one finger pressed to her clit, I snuck my other hand behind her and massaged her ass. She rocked into me happily, cooing my name. I reached further, inching closer and closer to my intended target until I swirled my finger around her tight hole. “Oh God, oh God,” she said. It puckered, and I kept circling.
She struggled against me, grinding her pelvis against mine as I came at her. “No, Delilah. Not God. I’m the devil, remember?”
I slipped the tip of my finger into her hole and she screamed out her release instantly. She rocked into me again and again, locking eyes with me. “You,” she said, like a threat.
Her hands came around my shoulders for leverage and she started sliding up and down my cock with authority. I let her control everything. She kissed my neck, flicked her fingers over my nipples, and pressed her fingers into my ass. Sweat dotted her temples as she moved her body on mine. Her cries rang out as she worked herself up for another explosion but trying damn hard to get me there too. She didn’t need to try that hard, but I had fun being the willing participant.
“Fuck, Simon, you’re so hard. I want…more.”
She bit down on my neck, and it spring-loaded my climax. I screamed her name and then dug my hands into her ass as I pounded my release into her. During the middle of mine, I felt her clench around me again, strangling my cock until it felt so good I thought I might pass out.
We fell back toward the door and I rested my forehead against it as I tried to think sanely again. I wanted to keep her here. Lock her up if I had to again, but then I realized it wouldn’t be the same if I did that. I wanted her to want to be that person who cared whether I ceased to exist or not. I didn’t want to have to make her do it.
I stepped back, pulling out of her as I did so. I worked my own clothes up, situating myself. When I looked up, she was still leaning against the door, watching me. I bent over, helping her put her clothes back on.
Her face was a mix of turmoil as we went through the motions. If she went to her grandfather’s, she wouldn’t like what she would find. But I knew it would be better if she saw for herself instead of everything coming from me. Once her clothes were on, I stepped back. “Kayleigh?” I called out.
I barely yelled it, but I knew no matter where the newborn vampire was in the estate, she’d be able to hear me. I needed someone to help Delilah out of here and it couldn’t be me. I wouldn’t be able to bring myself to do it.
Within a few moments, Kayleigh emerged, “Yes?”
“Can you take Delilah where she wants to go?”
“You’re leaving?” Kayleigh asked, pure shock in her voice.
Delilah only nodded.
I didn’t need to read minds to know what Kayleigh was thinking. She could never hide her own thoughts. Sure, she didn’t like me, but the way she looked back and forth between us, she clearly thought we were both being dumb. I had to agree with her, but I wasn’t going to force Lilah. Not anymore.
Galen came up behind us then. He put his hand on my shoulder and I watched as Kayleigh led Delilah from the house. They disappeared into the garage and then one of the cars started. I heard the telltale crunch of the tires against the gravel as they pulled down the driveway. I imagined my feet as big cement blocks, unable to move.
When they were long gone, I turned toward Galen. “Don’t tell me where they end up going. I don’t want to know.” If I did, there was nothing stopping me from going after her. At that moment, I had just enough willpower to listen to them leave the house, and nothing more.
I ran right up to my room and locked the door behind me, throwing my body down on the bed and staring up at the ceiling. I willed sleep to come. I’d gone without it for so long, and it did, eventually. But even in sleep, Delilah tortured me.
Chapter Fourteen
Delilah
For a vampire, I guessed Kayleigh was okay. She wasn’t intimidating like Simon or Galen. Galen, damn. I thought Simon was ferocious, but Galen had something more. Though he looked just as young as Simon, he had an air of authori
ty, like he’d lived a thousand hard years and was still here to talk about it. It was almost like looking at my grandfather, someone who you knew was weathered from experience and not just the passing of time. Much like my grandfather, when Galen came into the room, his essence was overpowering, but mostly, I could see how much he loved Simon.
I fretted over my lip. I tried to keep him out of my thoughts, but as I was in the same vicinity as another vampire, it was difficult. She’d been quiet on the way to the train station, quiet as she bought us tickets. I had told her I could make the journey alone, but she nearly only looked at me like I was crazy. “Do you want Simon to kill me?” Then, she laughed as if that was the funniest thing in the world. There must’ve been a backstory there I didn’t know about. All I knew was the stares she received as we made our way onto the train. There would be no compartment for us this time. Kayleigh didn’t try to impose her will on anyone like Simon had. She inquired after a sleeping car, but they were all filled, so she left it at that.
Though we were seated right next to one another, we hadn’t spoken to one another yet. The lack of talking was making me continuously antsy as she just sat there stoically, gazing in front of her. I looked at her, wondering if she was still awake even though her eyes were open. Before long, I couldn’t handle it anymore. “Do you guys sleep?”
Kayleigh blinked, then looked over at me slowly. “I’m sorry?”
I groaned and leaned closer to her. A wash of cold brushed that side of her body as I neared. “Sleep?” I whispered. “Do you guys sleep?”
She smiled. “Of course. I suppose we don’t need to, but it’s something all of us hold on to as part of our human selves.”
“How long have you been…this way?” I didn’t quite know how to ask the question. Was it an intimate one? Would it offend her?
“A vampire?” She chuckled. “A month.”
“A month!” I blurted. A few people in our section of train turned to look at me, but there weren’t very many. I lowered my voice anyway. “Only a month?” I looked at her with more appreciation. Maybe that was why she hadn’t initially bothered me like Galen had. They were so obviously together, which begged a lot of questions to creep up my throat, but I bit them back. “I bet Galen is way older than that.”
Her tinkling laugh filled the space between us. “You would guess right. He’s been around a long time.”
“And Simon?” I cringed as soon as I said it. Why had I asked that? I didn’t care. I was going back to my old life where I would stay and be happy. Where I could pretend that things didn’t exist like vampires and people who abused others for fun, and—
“Didn’t Simon tell you?”
I leaned back in my seat, letting thoughts of Simon fill me. I’d tried putting a barrier up, but it just wasn’t working. It only succeeded in making me feel exhausted. “No. He was very cryptic about it.”
“Well, he’s not as old as Galen. I don’t know exactly how old he is. Simon or Galen would have to tell you that.”
“I know Simon met Galen when he was still human, but I’m guessing now that Galen was not. He was a vampire already?”
Kayleigh nodded. “I’m surprised Simon didn’t tell you all this.”
Why? I wasn’t. “He doesn’t like to talk much, and he was pretty intent on getting revenge on my grandfather.”
“Yeah, but…”
She trailed off, and I watched as she fretted over her lip. “But what?”
“It’s just that it’s obvious Simon has feelings for you. I mean, I’m as shocked as you are right now. I didn’t think he had an ounce of humanity left in him to be honest. If you can’t tell, Simon and I aren’t exactly the best of friends.”
“Is he friends with anyone?” I muttered dryly. It seemed highly unlikely given the kind of person he was.
“Galen,” Kayleigh said resolutely. “He and Galen have a bond that—even though I understand it—still baffles me.”
I turned my head to watch the scenery whisk by. Trees and rivers. Lakes and mountains. The journey would be a long one back home, but at least I was free from the restraints Simon had put me in. No one liked to be forced to do anything, especially me. “What’s it like being with a vampire, anyway?”
“You know that already,” she said, her voice serious.
I froze. She was right. I’d been with Simon, and not just when he was forcing me either. We’d been together on our own terms, and because we both wanted it. I doodled on the glass with my finger.
“Do you like Simon?” she asked, genuinely curious.
I laughed at that. She asked as if she would be surprised if I’d said yes.
“I don’t mean anything by it,” she said automatically. “I can tell he’s different with you, so it’s possible, but—”
“Unlikely?” I guessed. I thought long and hard on what she asked. Mostly, I knew the truth, I just kept trying to find reasons to deny it yet came up with nothing. The truth was, even when he tortured me, I enjoyed it. It may have started out maliciously, but by the end of everything, both of us found a sadistic pleasure in it. “I do,” I told her.
I wasn’t looking at her, but I could feel her body respond. “Galen was right then.”
I turned to her. “About?”
“He said Simon only needed someone like me, someone who could show him that even though he is what he is, he’s not soulless. Their…activities…may be different than we’re used to, but look at the things we—well, humans—do for survival. Can we really say that we’re—you’re—,” she said, correcting herself again. “….better than them?”
“But the Feeders?” I said, my voice rising. “It’s disgusting.”
She nodded. “I thought so, too. It was my biggest hurdle, but I can tell you that the Feeders like being where they are. They came from worse situations. They’re happy having a home and being fed and clothed. They’re basically given everything they want, and in return, they just give up some of their blood and mostly have fun doing it.”
I tried to picture it in my head, but it just wasn’t working. “But you,” I whispered. “Do you do things with them?”
“I only drink from them,” she said. “Galen, too. He used to partake in every single way, but when he found me, he didn’t feel the need to find pleasure in them because he had me.”
“So, both of you only feed from them?”
She nodded. “It’s kind of like going to the grocery store except you never have to leave your house and the items just kind of willingly fall into your lap.”
She chuckled and smiled, but the thought of it still repulsed me. I didn’t care how she tried to spin things, the idea of vampires wasn’t something I could easily get past even if the ones they fed from were willing donors. I shrugged. “I don’t think Simon would ever stop.”
Kayleigh didn’t answer. She turned away and stared straight ahead again. I took that as agreeing with what I said without actually forming the words. What was her aim in all this? Did she actually want me to stay with Simon? She said herself that she didn’t even like him.
“Galen said he just needs someone like me…” What was her point?
I supposed I could be a reminder of his humanity. For all the terrifying things he did, though, it seemed highly unlikely he had much left. Most of all, I didn’t think I could get past those things. It was time to start thinking with my head and not just all about myself, and my whims, and wants. I was older now. If anything, this was teaching me that it was time to start caring for myself. Grandpa wasn’t the person I thought he was. I could go off and live on my own.
I could support myself if I had to. I’d gotten myself out of this mess, hadn’t I?
Chapter Fifteen
Delilah
Kayleigh rented a car at the train station and drove me straight to the front door of my grandfather’s house. She wanted to get out of the car and walk with me up to the house, but I told her not to. My grandfather didn’t like strangers near his things. She wouldn’t have even
made it inside the house, anyway. She would’ve been turned away at the front door.
“Are you sure?” she asked again. She dipped her head low and looked out the window. She’d spoken to Galen a dozen different times on the last half of the trip. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that the fiercest vampire of them all was genuinely worried about her, and he asked a lot of questions about me too from what I could hear.
“I’ll be fine,” I told her. “Listen, um, don’t tell anyone where I live, okay?” I asked. It wouldn’t matter because I was already determined to move out and find my own life, but just in case anyone came snooping. Simon already knew where I lived, but I also didn’t think I’d have to worry about him anymore. He wouldn’t come back for me at least, that much I was sure of.
“No problem,” Kayleigh said. “You don’t have to worry about us. We prefer to stick to ourselves, anyway. Now, Simon, I don’t know. Once he gets something in his head, it’s hard for him to get it out.”
“My grandfather?” I asked. I looked up at the house. I knew already that the guards would be assembling, scoping out the strange car parked near the driveway. I’d have to go in soon before they came out.
“And you.”
My head whipped around to stare at her. “I don’t think that will be a problem.”
“I think if you wanted it to it could be.”
I shook my head. What was she? Some sort of vampire matchmaker? No, I was done with this conversation, and I was done with this whole terrible episode of my life. “Look, the only good thing that came out of all this is that I finally realized something. My life’s on me to make it what I want it to be. I’d been too dependent on my grandfather, a man who may not even care. That’s all I want to take out of this.”
I pushed the door open and started to get out, but Kayleigh grabbed my hand. “Take care, Delilah.”
A shiver ran through me. She must’ve noticed because she pulled her grip from mine. I turned around, giving her a half smile. As vampires went, she was pretty cool even if her skin was ice cold. “I will.” I got out of the car and shut the door behind me.
