Max rang up her items. “Your total is three dollars and eighty-nine cents. The orange juice is on the house. You’re a first-time customer and I hope you’ll return. I can extend credit if you need it.”
“No, thanks, I don’t need credit.” She extracted a five from her purse.
After Max gave Silk her change, he called out to Sonny Boy. “Stop what you’re doing, Sonny Boy. I want you to carry the lady’s bags home.” Max turned to Silk. “Where’d you say you live?”
“Oh, I’m only a hop, skip, and a jump away. The white house on the corner of Twelfth and Flower,” she said.
“Oh, that’s where the Dixons live. Shame about Ernestine; she was a nice lady. Are you a family member?”
“I guess you could say that. In a few days, I’ll be Buddy’s new wife.”
Max looked surprised. “I thought Buddy would be in mourning for a while. I can’t believe he’s getting married, so soon. Well, congratulations, uh, I didn’t catch your name.”
“It’s Silk.”
“Sonny Boy, this is Silk. She lives in the white house across the street from the school. I want you to carry her bags home and then come straight back, you hear?”
“Yes, sir, Mr. Max,” Sonny Boy replied.
With Sonny Boy toting two large shopping bags, Silk led the way home, and then she suddenly stopped walking. “Take those sunglasses off and let me see your eyes, Sonny Boy.”
He shook his head. “My Aunt Verline told me to always keep these glasses on when I’m out in public.”
“What your Aunt Verline doesn’t know won’t hurt her. I bet you have nice eyes, Sonny Boy. Come on, let me see ’em,” Silk cajoled. She was morbidly curious about the damage that the violent crackers down South had done to Sonny Boy.
“One eye can’t see nothing, and the other one sees things fuzzy.”
“Stop blabbing about it and let me see for myself what kind of shape your eyes are in. If you wanna carry my bags home, you gotta let me see what’s underneath them glasses. Now, take ’em off and show me.”
Sonny Boy carefully placed the bags on the ground. Slowly and hesitantly, he removed his sunglasses. Silk inhaled sharply. She hadn’t expected his eyes to be as damaged as they were. The right eye was a hazel-colored, stray eye that didn’t appear to be able to focus on anything for very long. The left eye was gone, and Sonny Boy was left with an empty eye socket.
Silk was reminded of how she’d gouged out the eyes of Mr. Perry with a pair of ice tongs. During her fit of rage, the gory result of her actions hadn’t turned her stomach at all, but looking into an empty eye socket, unexpectedly, had her on the verge of vomiting. Averting her gaze, she asked, “What happened?”
“They pulled it out.” The memory caused Sonny Boy to tremble.
“Who pulled it out?”
“Mean white men yanked my eye out. They said they’d fix it so I couldn’t look at any more white women.”
“What else did they do to you?”
“They beat me and kicked me. Hit me over the head with a baseball bat. And they broke both my legs.” The horrifying recollection caused Sonny Boy to throw a fit. He began whining unpleasantly, turning in fast circles, and smacking the dented side of his head. “I ain’t looked at no white woman. I kept my eyes down. I ain’t looked at no white woman. I kept my eyes down,” he continuously repeated.
“Simmer down and stop acting the fool, Sonny Boy! Put your sunglasses back on, pick them bags up, and let’s go,” Silk said sternly.
Responding to Silk’s sharp tone, Sonny Boy pulled himself together. “Are you gonna tell my Aunt Verline that I showed you my eyes?” he asked meekly.
“No, that’s gonna stay between you and me. It’ll be our little secret.” She gave Sonny Boy a sneaky smile. “You wanna keep secrets with me?”
He nodded briskly. “Okay.”
She leaned in and planted a kiss on Sonny Boy’s lips. “Now, our little secret is sealed with a kiss.”
Sonny Boy grinned and seemed to be hyperventilating. “Are…are…are you my girlfriend, Silk?”
“Uh-huh. But that’s a secret. You gotta keep our romance between you and me,” she said teasingly. “I’m gonna be getting married soon, and we don’t want my new husband to find out, do we?”
“No.” Sonny Boy shook his head.
When they reached her house, Silk gave Sonny a dollar tip for carrying her bags.
Sonny Boy looked at the dollar and frowned. “This is too much. I only charge a quarter to carry bags. Mr. Max is gonna get mad if he thinks I stole your money.”
Silk dug around in her purse and retrieved a quarter. “Here you go. Show this to Max and hide that dollar in your other pocket. That’s another secret between us.”
Sonny Boy stuffed the dollar bill in his pocket and lingered on the stone walkway. “You’re real pretty, Silk, and I love you.”
“Yeah, all right, but don’t go around blabbing about how much you love me. Keep that information to yourself, you hear me? Nobody is supposed to know our secret.”
“I won’t tell anyone,” he said earnestly, and then whispered, “I love you.”
Silk cracked up laughing. Poking fun and playing mind games with the town idiot was somewhat pleasurable. “Go on, now, Sonny Boy. Get back to the store before Max comes looking for you.”
CHAPTER 20
Silk filled two bowls with cereal and called Dallas and Myron into the kitchen. One look at the box of Cheerios and Myron wrinkled his nose. “Mommy buys us Frosted Flakes.”
Without a word, Silk picked up Myron’s bowl and dumped the cereal back into the box. “You done earned yourself a punishment, so get on upstairs with your brother.”
“But…”
“Don’t backtalk me, boy. Get upstairs before I grab some switches and go to town on your bare legs and backside.”
Myron skulked off toward the stairs. He looked over his shoulder and forlornly watched Silk pouring milk into Dallas’ bowl.
“You want some sugar on your cereal, Dallas?” Silk asked in a sweet tone.
“Yes, ma’am,” Dallas responded, quickly learning that agreeing with Silk was the best way to get along with her.
“I don’t like it when you say, Yes, ma’am, it makes me seem old. Being that I’m your new stepmother, you need to give me a proper title.” Silk stared up at the ceiling thoughtfully. “Do you wanna call me, Mommy?”
“Um…” Dallas fidgeted with her spoon, not wanting to say anything that would cause her to be banished to her bedroom.
“I realize I’m not your real mother, so you don’t have to call me, Mommy.” Silk squinted as she contemplated a suitable name for the children to call her. “How about Mama?”
Risking punishment, Dallas hesitantly shook her head no.
“You’re trying my patience, Dallas. You gotta call me something, so what’s it gonna be?” Silk’s voice took on a hard quality, and Dallas’ winced in fear.
Silk smiled suddenly. “I got it! I know exactly what I want you and your brothers to call me. Y’all can call me, M’dear. That’s the shortcut way of saying, my dear. It’s nice and classy, don’t you think?”
“Yes.”
Silk arched a brow. “Yes, what?”
“Yes, M’dear.”
“Good girl. Now, eat your breakfast.” While Dallas ate cereal, Silk put away most of her goodies, storing them in a hiding space behind the canned goods. With a Hershey’s chocolate bar and a Coca-Cola in hand, she sat across the table from Dallas. She removed the wrapper from the chocolate bar and popped the cap off the bottle of soda pop.
Silk was delighted to have a cabinet full of goodies all to herself. Back home, Big Mama hardly ever allowed her to have sweets. Whenever the white folks stopped by for their remedies and brought along treats for Silk, Big Mama would keep the goodies for herself, telling Silk she didn’t want her getting cavities because she was trained to nurse folks, not to pull out teeth.
It was rare, but every now and then, after giving Big
Mama her thrills, Silk would earn a piece of candy or a slice of cake. When Silk grew older and had money in her pocket, she used to buy all sorts of goodies. She tried to stash them in secret places in the shack, but Big Mama, having a nose like a bloodhound, could always sniff out Silk’s treats. She’d take a strap or a couple of switches to Silk’s behind to break her out of the habit of hiding goodies from her.
Silk’s mind began to wander back in time.
“Ain’t nothing worse than living under the same roof as a liar and a cheat,” Big Mama complained after whipping the daylights out of Silk.
“I won’t hide goodies, anymore, Big Mama.”
“Shut yo’ lying mouth! Now, go lay your yella tail on that bed and gap your legs open for me. You done worked my nerves something terrible, and I gotta get me some thrills in order to calm myself down.”
“You want me to give you the special treatment before I lay down on the bed and gap open my legs?”
“Yeah, I guess so. Get on over here and sit on this chair,” Big Mama said, kicking off her boots. Next, she took off her skirt and let it float down to the floor.
Silk sat on the chair and Big Mama pulled it close.
“Don’t I teach you right from wrong, Silk?”
“Yes, Big Mama.”
“Then, why you so bad and ornery?”
“Because I was borned bad,” Silk said, repeating what Big Mama had always told her.
“Is you ready to be good?”
“Yes, Big Mama.”
Following the steps of a ritual she’d been participating in for as long as she could remember, Silk tugged down the woman’s big bloomers and when they pooled around her ankles, Big Mama stepped out of her underwear and kicked them out of the way. She propped a big, meaty foot on the seat of the chair that Silk sat upon.
“Welp, get to it, girl.”
Eager to get Big Mama out of her foul mood, Silk palmed the woman’s enormous buttocks as she used her tongue to provide pleasure.
Big Mama shuddered and widened her fleshy thighs. “You getting better and better at giving me the special treatment.”
Encouraged by the compliment, Silk worked harder, sucking with her lips and penetrating deeply with her tongue.
Suddenly angry, Big Mama yanked Silk’s hair. “Slow down, you lil’ yella heifer. You think you slick, trying to take me over the edge before I’m ready. I don’t know where you learning this stuff, but you getting mighty tricky with them nasty lips and that wicked tongue of yours. That’s enough special treatment. Go lay your fresh-butt on the bed, so I can get me some poontang.
Back in the moment, Silk gazed at Dallas curiously. “Hey, Dallas, did you give your mama thrills at night?”
Dallas looked at Silk, puzzled. “Did I give her what?”
“Thrills. You know, in the bed?”
“We said our prayers kneeling by the bed, and she taught me how to make up my bed. Sometimes she put my stuffed toys on the bed—”
“That’s not what I’m talking about. You ain’t never lay underneath your mama in the bed…you know, so she could get thrills?”
Completely perplexed, Dallas shrugged. “I don’t think so.”
“Y’all Northerners sho’ is strange. Kids talk back to their elders and complain about what they don’t want to eat for breakfast.” Silk shook her head. “I had a strong Southern mama. She didn’t take any mess off of me. She taught me right from wrong, and most importantly, she taught me how to keep her nerves calmed down by giving her thrills and special treatment. She told me it’s a secret that’s kept between little girls and their mamas.” Silk pondered briefly. “Maybe it’s a Louisiana tradition.”
Having no idea what Silk was referring to, Dallas asked, “Does giving thrills mean you made your mother laugh?”
“I suppose you could say that. Actually, what I gave my mama was way better than laughter.” Silk looked at Dallas. “Can you keep secrets, Dallas?”
The innocent little child gazed into Silk’s eyes and nodded her head.
CHAPTER 21
Wearing Ernestine’s blue apron with white ruffles around the edges, Silk greeted Buddy at the door with a kiss and a glass of Jack Daniel’s. She noticed that on many of the TV programs she enjoyed watching, the wife greeted the husband with a drink and made sure the children were quiet and orderly.
“It sure is quiet. Where are the kids?”
“They already ate dinner and they’re upstairs in their rooms. The boys are building something with their Erector Set and you know, Dallas, she’s fooling around with her dolls.”
“We always ate together as a family when Ernestine…”
Silk winced, and Buddy’s voice trailed off as he noticed the hurt look on Silk’s face.
“Forgive me, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to compare you to my ex-wife.”
“It’s okay. We can all eat together tomorrow, if you’d like,” Silk said quietly. “I figured it would be nice to have a romantic dinner with just the two of us on the first night that your sister isn’t here. It’s nice to have some privacy from all those church folks that were hanging around the house.”
“You’re right. This is our first night having our home to ourselves. You know, I’m really looking forward to making you Mrs. Richard Dixon. Out of tragedy came an unexpected blessing, and having you makes me feel like the luckiest man in the world.”
“Tell me more,” Silk said, grinning.
“You’re beautiful on the inside and out, and I already know you’re the best mother I could have found for my children.”
“Thank you, Buddy. I’m so glad you appreciate the effort I’m putting into helping you rear your children. I know I can’t take the place of their natural mother, but I plan to always do the best I can. The children were calling me Miss Silk, but that sounds like I’m no more than a neighbor lady, so we decided together that they would call me, M’dear. What do you think about that?”
“I like it. It sounds loving and respectful.” Buddy sniffed the air. “Whatever’s on the stove cooking, sure smells good.”
“I wanted to whip up some Creole cooking for you. You know, some good ol’ gumbo or jambalaya, but we have so many leftovers that the church folks gave us, I simply heated up something that was already in the ice box.”
In actuality, Silk didn’t know how to fry an egg. Big Mama had prepared all the meals at home, cooking up her remedies and supper out of the same black kettle.
“I’ve never tasted Creole food. I’ve heard a lot about gumbo and I can’t wait to taste it. So, what’s for supper? All this talk of food has my stomach growling.”
“Chili con carne, rice, and corn bread. Peach cobbler for dessert. I froze a lot of the leftovers that the church folks brought, but there’s too much to fit in the freezer. Do you want me to throw it all out or keep heating up leftovers for supper until it runs out?”
“Those good people toiled over those meals, and it would be a sin to throw away good food.” Buddy peeked inside the refrigerator and whistled in surprise when he saw the stacks of plastic containers. “You won’t have to worry about cooking a meal for quite a while, Silk.”
“I’m looking forward to cooking for you, Buddy,” she said, lying through her teeth.
“Make sure you put gumbo at the top of the list after we get through the leftovers.”
Silk set a steaming plate of chili in front of Buddy and prepared another plate for herself. She sat across from him, eating daintily. Stuffed from cookies and candy, she stirred the chili mixture around with her fork.
“You eat like a bird, Silk.”
“Never had much of an appetite.”
Buddy ate heartily, and then pushed his plate away. His jovial expression turned sad. “I have some bad news I was saving until after supper.”
“What is it?” Silk feared Buddy was going to tell her that they had to postpone their wedding plans.
“The twins aren’t doing well at all,” he said solemnly.
She let out a sigh of r
elief, and then quickly painted on a concerned expression. “Are they gonna make it?”
“They’re fighting hard and holding on. But they’re gravely ill with heart and respiratory problems. The doctors don’t think they got enough oxygen when they were born, and there’s probably something wrong with their brains.” Choked up, Buddy dropped his head. “My little babies aren’t going to be normal. They’re never coming home because they’ll need medical care for the rest of their lives.” Buddy looked distraught.
Silk had to contain herself from clapping her hands with glee. It was a stroke of luck that life-threatening ailments had worked their way into the twins’ bodies, preventing them from ever entering the Dixon household. Adding two sick babies to Buddy’s brood of kids was more than Silk could handle.
“Would you like me to call the children downstairs so you can tell them the sorrowful news?”
“Yes, it’s gonna break their little hearts, but I have to tell them.”
While Buddy sat in the living room, sipping Jack Daniel’s, Silk went upstairs and escorted the children down. Myron, Bruce, and Dallas stood with their hands folded in front of them. “Hi, Daddy,” they said quietly in unison.
Buddy was too broken up over the twins to notice that his sons weren’t behaving like their normal rambunctious selves, and Dallas wore a straight face instead of greeting him with a smile.
After he gave them the sad news, Dallas started to cry, but when Silk gave her an evil look, she quickly wiped away her tears. The boys shifted from one foot to another, but didn’t say a word.
“Well, it’s time for bed, kiddies. Go on upstairs, put on your pajamas, and hit the sack,” Silk said with a sweet smile and a sugary tone of voice. “We’ll all say a prayer for your baby sisters.”
“Mommy makes us take a bath before we go to bed,” Myron interjected.
“Oh, all right. I’ll run the bathwater.” Silk smiled at the three children adoringly.
When Silk got Myron and Bruce alone in the bathroom, she pinched Myron’s arm. He opened his mouth to yell, and Silk whispered, “Hush up or I’ll make it hurt worse. Did Mommy pinch you every night before your bath?” Silk asked in a spiteful tone.
The Secrets of Silk Page 12
