“And there you are being a pig, just like I said all men were. Thanks for proving me right.”
“And there you are being bitchy, proving me right.”
I took a few steps forward, irritation flooding through me. Even though I had just called all men pigs, I was still pissed with the way he described women. Maybe I was being a hypocrite, but I honestly felt like he’d gone too far. Him calling me ‘bitchy’ was a tipping point. Walking away would be letting him off too easy. Then again, if I stayed and argued I’d pretty much be proving his point further. It was a toss-up. Deciding I didn’t give a damn what he thought of me I turned to face him. I could tell he was expecting me to do just that. He was just waiting for my next barrage of words.
“If you don’t do relationships and I’m so bitchy then why’d you even ask me how to get in contact with you, Ethan?”
“I don’t know Amanda. You didn’t seem bitchy this morning,” he admitted.
I dropped my gaze to the floor. That one stung. I had no idea if he did it on purpose. With that one sentence, he reminded me of what we shared upstairs, and I wasn’t thinking about the sex. It was hard to figure out what kind of person he was now, so I stuck to my guns. At the core, no matter how messed up his childhood, I figured he was an asshole like the rest of them. This little conversation was doing nothing to change that opinion anyway.
“If we’re going down that road, then you didn’t seem so–”
“I’m just going to stop you right there. We can go in these circles all day and there’s no point. That would only be a colossal waste of time.”
“I guess there is something we can agree on,” I told him.
I couldn’t shake the feeling of being offended by the insults he slung at me. I took another few steps forward until I was closer to the doors leading outside. I didn’t hear Ethan following me so I turned to look at him. He was standing in the exact same spot as before, arms crossed over his chest. Despite all the bickering we had just done, I couldn’t help but notice how good he looked, even if he was just wearing gym clothes.
He must have caught me checking him out because he laughed and shifted his weight to his other foot. “I thought you were done with me?”
“I am,” I quickly shot back.
My face grew hot and I couldn’t for the life of me figure out if it was anger or something else. My eyes focused on his bobbing Adam’s apple. I felt a familiar churning in my stomach and quickly thought about how he’d just said I was being ‘bitchy’ and how pissed off it made me. Even that wasn’t enough to wipe away my attraction for him.
“Doesn’t look like it,” he said with a smirk.
“I’m leaving,” I turned on my heel to walk away.
As I made my way outside I finally heard his footsteps behind me. He wasn’t rushing, but he was walking fast enough to catch up to me. He swooped in front of me and stood in my way, making me stop dead in my tracks. I made a noise of frustration and stomped my foot.
“You’re so fucking annoying! I need to put that on my list of shit qualities in men.”
“I might be,” he told me before leaning in and whispering in my ear, “But that didn’t stop you from enjoying last night with me.”
I felt a shiver run straight down my spine. His hot breath on my earlobe, the sound of his husky voice, and the words he said were too much for me to ignore. Whether or not he was a pig like the rest of them, I couldn’t deny sleeping with him was a great time. It was more than a great time actually. The man knew what he was doing and damn if I didn’t think he was panty-dropping gorgeous. Still, I had to keep up my strong appearance. I was determined.
“That’s beside the point,” I told him, voice quivering.
Ethan pulled back from my ear. He looked me in the eyes, but I was distracted by how close his face was to mine. I didn’t know what he was trying to pull or what kind of point he was trying to prove, but it wasn’t sitting well with me. It felt like I was losing at a game I didn’t even know I was playing. No matter how physically attractive he was and how great he was in bed, that didn’t take away from the fact that he was an asshole-pig.
To make matters worse, he seemed to revel in his cockiness and loved to show off his wealth. That just made him an even more despicable person to me. There was no doubt in my mind that he felt the same way toward me for his own stupid reasons.
“Oh, it’s exactly the point,” he countered.
I looked at him and made a gesture with my hands asking what he meant. I was so done with the conversation.
He smirked, “Just sex?”
I stared at him. I was pretty stunned for a moment, but then it made sense. He loved last night just as much as I did. Neither of us did relationships. And, most importantly, he was a man who only had one thing on his mind. I stayed quiet for a moment to let his question sink in. I thought back to my pact with Tina. We had just made that pact the night before, agreeing not to get involved with a man—emotionally involved to be exact.
I looked him up and down for a moment and figured he was safe for the ‘friends with benefits’ clause in my makeshift contract with Tina. Even though he was a little personal with me that morning, that didn’t mean we had to do a relationship. I still found him despicable. We had a moment, if that, and now it was gone.
I cleared my throat and stood up straight as I gathered as much dignity as I could muster. “Fine.”
“What was that?”
I knew he just wanted to hear it again, but I said it anyway, “Fine. JUST sex.”
He smiled with satisfaction, but I didn’t let it get to me. This was the nature of the game and I was all for it. We exchanged phone numbers before we both turned and walked in separate directions, each of us going our own way.
The weekend went by in a blur. I had spent a lot of time getting things ready for a new store I was opening up, doing research, and working out. I also went out with Mike for drinks, but had conveniently left out the story about Amanda. That was something I wanted to keep to myself for the time being. Besides, we had just agreed to be ‘friends with benefits’. There was no reason I needed to share that with anybody.
I smiled smugly. I liked the idea of being able to call her up any time I wanted to get laid. I especially liked that there was no timeline. There would never be a complaint about how much or how little I contacted her. I was sure she’d still find something to bitch about though. After all, she was still a woman.
I was enjoying a lunchtime cup of coffee on a park bench before I had to head back up to the office. I typically enjoyed work and couldn’t complain about my office, but there was nothing like the freedom of fresh air. I sat back and relaxed, watching a family of four playing tag around a group of trees. They all looked so happy to be together. Even the parents looked happy. I watched them and thought about how they were picture perfect. The little boy looked to be about five years old and his sister looked about 7.
I laughed as I saw the little girl pretend to get caught by her little brother. She could easily outrun him, but she had no interest in doing that. She wanted to make him laugh in delight. He tagged her on the back of the knee and she let out a cry of defeat before tumbling dramatically to the ground. The mom and dad poked their heads out from behind a tree, both of them laughing hysterically. The dad ran to the little boy and high-fived him to congratulate the young man on a victory.
Meanwhile, the mom went over to the little girl and helped her brush off grass on her clothes. “You’re it!” the mom yelled before taking the little boy by the hand and trotting off.
The little girl buried her hands in her face against the tree and started counting down before charging off behind her family. The four of them ran around, further and further from me, but that didn’t stop me from continuing to watch. As I watched them play, I wondered what it was like. The only time I had ever played tag was at school and it was nothing like the game I was watching now.
I wondered what it was like to be a father and husband. I wondered wh
at the little boy felt. How it was possible for that little boy to be so happy. I hoped it wasn’t a rare moment for the family. It certainly didn’t seem like it. I thought about what sorts of jobs the parents had that allowed them to be able to be out with their kids at the park in the middle of the day. Whatever jobs they had, I’m sure they’re main priority was “family”. That was a concept I couldn’t comprehend. I couldn’t imagine what it was like to have a nurturing and loving home to go to every day.
I thought about the moment of comfort I had when I opened up to Amanda the other morning. I actually felt loved—like someone cared about me for once. Was that what the children felt every day? I pursed my lips and looked away. I was letting everything get to me too much. I wasn’t a “family man”. I took a long, slow sip of my coffee as I watched the them playfully run around a tree. The words that stood out in my mind were, “You never had this.”
“I’m just a playboy remember…” I whispered to myself as I sat back with a heavy sigh.
I saw the mother looking at her children fondly. She sat curled up against her husband, who had his arm easily slung over her shoulder. I leaned forward in my seat a bit and narrowed my eyes as I studied her carefully. There was so much love in her eyes it was unmistakable even at a distance. A knot formed in my stomach and it tightened painfully. I shifted in my seat and felt my phone slide a bit in my pocket.
I pulled it out and looked at the time. I had a few minutes before I had to go back to the office. I unlocked the screen and checked my messages even though there were no new ones.
“Fuck it.” I said, tapping on the phone screen.
I pulled up Amanda’s number to send her a text.
-Tonight? Your place?-
It didn’t take long for my phone to vibrate with a reply. I took a moment to smile at how quickly she had gotten back to me before opening the message.
-Your place. 7pm.-
I nodded. I liked that she was assertive and clear on what she wanted. She wasn’t shy in letting me know what she wanted. It was probably one of the things that made her different from all the women I had been with before.
I sent her another text.
-Dinner first?-
She instantly shot back.
-Just sex. Remember.-
I responded back with a simple “okay” and slid my phone back into my pocket. I let out another deep sigh. Here I was, making arrangements to hook up with a perfectly nice woman as I watched an entire family have the time of their lives. They were happy. They were close and loved being together. The entire foundation of whatever I was doing with Amanda was the complete opposite of that. I had brought it on myself, of course, and I didn’t exactly mind it. Amanda was interesting, and fun, and smoking hot. She was great in bed. She wasn’t shy.
If ever there were a woman I wanted as ‘friends with benefits’, it would be her.
But I watched the husband and wife sneak a quick, affectionate peck on the lips before each taking the hand of one child. They walked slowly off toward the ice cream cart. All I had ever known was how to pack a bag quickly and go to a new foster home. The only family games I played were the ones where I tried to figure out how to stay out of trouble. What I was looking at was the sort of thing that only existed in dreams or movies. It was a brief moment before my phone’s alarm rang, letting me know it was time to get back to the office.
____________________________
After work I sat at my small, minimalist, but tasteful dining room table and ate in silence. The table was pushed up against the wall, but I still had a decent view out the window. I usually didn’t mind eating alone and having no one to talk to, but something about that day felt different. I finished up my dinner and threw the containers away before sitting on one of the hunter green chairs in my living room. I had just sat down when there was a knock at the door.
“It’s open,” I called out, swiveling the chair around to face the door.
It quickly opened and Amanda walked right in. She dropped her purse on the coffee table between the two chairs and the leather couch. She dropped down on the couch and took off her high heels.
“These are killing me,” she groaned.
She paused and looked up at me before dropping her other high heel to the floor. The look on her face had changed in an instant. She was no longer the person who had walked in freely, acting normally. She was whatever persona I figured she had adopted for our little agreement.
“So, men are dogs?” I asked snidely.
“Yup,” she said matter-of-factly.
“If I recall correctly, you’re the one who came running when I suggested sex.”
"I wouldn't say I came running but, even if I did, who proposed the sex, to begin with? Oh, that's right. The man." She grinned triumphantly.
“If you want to get off on a technicality,” I said. I had set her up for a perfect dirty joke, but wasn’t sure if she’d take the bait. When she said nothing, I went for it, “But I don’t think that’s what you want to get off on if you’re here.”
“See? Pigs. All of you. And, by the way, I don’t think I actually used the term ‘dogs’ to describe you all.”
“Oh, well, that makes all the difference.” I laughed sarcastically.
I stood up and unbuttoned my shirt before taking it off to drape it over the back of my chair. Amanda stood up and took off the little blazer she was wearing. I unbuckled my belt and stared her dead in the eyes before looking down at her chest.
“Pig,” she scoffed, but it didn’t stop her from unbuttoning her shirt and pulling it off. She was wearing a simple black bra but her fair-skinned, full breasts looked magnificent spilling out from over the cups.
“You’re not such a peach yourself,” I shot back.
She walked over and gripped the hem of my undershirt to pull it off. Hot blood pumped through my body. Even when we were bickering and letting insults fly off our tongues, there was no doubt in my mind that she went after what she wanted. It was hot. I couldn’t tell if I hated her or was insanely attracted to her. Maybe it was both. Either way, lust was entirely different and that was something we were both feeling.
I unbuttoned and unzipped her dark, skin-tight jeans and she quickly shimmied out of them. I picked them up from the floor and placed them on the chair I had been sitting on, appreciating the view as I watched her walk back over to the couch. She was swaying her hips more than she usually did, which made her round ass look even more appealing with the cheeks poking out from under her red panties. I could already feel myself swelling inside my pants.
I unbuckled my belt, undid my pants, and practically threw them down my legs. When Amanda turned around I was in nothing but my boxes. I always felt good naked. She reached up and twirled her caramel brown hair between her hands. My gaze traced over the curve of her hips as my eyes took in her body. Her legs were long and slender. She was beautiful in an effortless way.
I walked forward and wrapped my arms around her to unclasp her bra. She gripped my arms and gave them a squeeze before turning me around and pushing me to sit down on the couch. She straddled my lap as I pulled her bra off with one yank of my hand. I threw it back and heard it hit the window before sliding down to the floor.
She laughed, “Imagine being a passerby and seeing a bra smack into a window.”
I chuckled and licked over one of her nipples before pushing my hips up so she could feel my hardness against her. She pushed down on me, moving her hips in a circular motion with a breathy whimper.
“Fuck,” I groaned.
I had been with a lot of women. There was a good number of them who were confident, sexy, and sure of what they were doing. But there was something distinctly different about Amanda in the way she moved and responded to my touch. Even the way she looked at me was different. It was something I couldn’t put a finger on, but it drove me wild. It was that difference of hers that made me want her time and time again. That was why I agreed to our little ‘sex only’ arrangement. She didn’t disappoi
nt. Sex with her was scorching and natural. It felt like we always knew exactly what the other wanted.
I slipped my hand under the waistband of her panties and kneaded her ass before giving it a good pinch.
She jerked forward a bit and stared at me. I gave her a little smirk as she leaned in and licked the line of my jaw before nibbling my neck. She pressed down harder on me, then slid off my lap until she was on her knees in front of me. I felt my myself twitch and throb. As much as I wanted to be inside her again, I was dying to know how her lips would feel wrapped around me. I wanted to feel her wet, warm tongue trace along my length before taking me into her mouth.
She licked her lips and looked up at me with the cutest, sexiest smile I had ever seen. It was like she was reading my mind. The anticipation was probably written all over my face.
Just Sex Page 7
