Destiny

by Mitchel Grace

After I got to Olivia’s house, I immediately told her everything about the last forty-eight hours. I saw something in her eyes that I wasn’t used to. She pitied me. Olivia had always looked at me in a certain way that made me feel better than I actually was, but the pity I saw was enough to make me question just how bad my situation was. Could I recover from everything?

  “I’m sorry that things have gone so badly for you. Is there anything I can do?” she asked.

  This was my chance. There was one thing she could do. I loved her, and I knew in my heart that she still loved me. She could make a life with me. It would be asking a lot, but wasn’t it worth a shot?

  “Are you okay? You’re being awfully quiet,” she said.

  “I’ve actually never been better. An event like this puts life into perspective. I did a lot of bad things to get to where I’m at, and God knows I made some mistakes with us back when we were younger, but I know what’s important now. None of the money I’ve made has resulted in happiness, and if I’m being honest, Chastity never made me feel the way you did. I guess what I’m saying is that I’m going to start doing things the right way, and I’m going after my happiness. That all starts with you. I love you, Olivia. I never stopped loving you for one second.”

  “I don’t know what to say, Eric.”

  “Just tell me how you feel. I need honesty.”

  “I can’t do that. I’m married, and I know your life seems messed up at the moment, but I’m sure Chastity is going to call any day now. No woman in her right mind would walk away from a guy like you. I know.”

  “You walked away.”

  “In a moment of insanity.”

  “So you do have feelings for me?”

  “Of course I do. What we shared doesn’t go away. It fades somewhat, but every time I see your face, it all comes flowing back. I’m fourteen every time I see you, Eric. I love that, but it’s not right for either of us. I think you know that deep down.”

  “I used to, but I see things clearly now. There are things that are meant to be in this world, and we can’t stop fighting for them. I know your situation is complicated, but I’m all right with that.”

  “Are you really? Think about it for a second. If I did tell you I loved you right now, what would happen?”

  “We would make a life together starting today.”

  “So it’s that simple? What would you do when Richard came knocking at your door, and how would I explain to my son why I was leaving the only man he’s ever called dad? For that matter, could you be the man in Phillip’s life? Are you really willing to take responsibility for a child and our actions?”

  “I should have had a child with you a long time ago. I think back to that all the time. I wish I could take back what I said so we could have a family together. I would welcome any child who was a part of you. I would be the best stepdad, or even just plain dad, that’s possible. As for Richard, I can take whatever he wants to do, if it means I get to be with you.”

  “You’re putting me in a difficult situation.”

  “I know that, but this needs to be said. I’m already twenty-five, and I’m not getting any younger. I don’t want to wake up one day and realize that I should have pleaded with the love of my life to be with me when I was younger. I’m never going to be satisfied unless you’re by my side, and I know deep down that you won’t be either. Just let me show you that all those same feelings are there,” I said and wrapped my arms around her.

  I moved my lips toward Olivia’s, but she pulled back. I neither pulled back nor advanced in that moment. I simply looked into her eyes. As we gazed at each other, I saw so many things in her. She was scared and confused, but also excited about what we could be doing there. I knew that no matter how much she acted like she didn’t want this to happen, she had been craving this moment just as much as me.

  “Give me a chance to show you that what we have is still worth pursuing. You can say when, and I’ll stop immediately. Okay?” I asked.

  She nodded, and I kissed her. I had almost forgotten her soft embrace. I slowly turned our soft kiss into a deeper one. As I did, I lifted her up, and she wrapped her legs around me. I carried her to the bedroom, and we crashed down to the bed. She pulled my shirt off, and then we paused for a second. She simply stared into my eyes. This was what we had been missing. Wrong or not, this just felt right on every level. I went back in for a gentle kiss and slipped my arms around her as I did. We slowly removed each other’s clothes, and then I made my way down to her neck. She had always loved the way I kissed her neck, and I couldn’t help but notice the way her whole body quivered when I kissed her in just the right place. As I slid down her body, I made sure to kiss every inch of it until I got to her legs. She suddenly let out a breath of frustration and pulled me back up to her. As we met face to face, she said the word I least wanted to hear.

  “When.”

  “How is that possible?” I asked in disbelief.

  “Because as much as I love everything you’re doing right now, it’s wrong. This is my fault. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let things go this far.”

  “I don’t believe that you think this is wrong. I think you know with every part of your being that this is how things were supposed to be. I can feel it every time we touch. You want this. Why not let it happen and see where it can take us?”

  “I do know that, but it’s complicated for me.”

  “What happened to that girl I used to know? She wouldn’t have thrown away one moment of passion just because someone she didn’t even love would be disappointed. She wasn’t serious about much either. She just enjoyed life and loved the only boy who would do anything for her. I miss that Olivia.”

  “I grew up, Eric. I have a kid now, and . . .”

  “You don’t this morning. Right now, you’re the same Olivia I’ve always known, and we’re not going to overthink this or put labels on it until it’s over. We’re just going to do exactly what comes naturally. This is what’s meant to be. Now, what is it that you really want to do?”

  For a brief moment, I saw her smile and caught a glimpse of that girl I used to know. She was still in there. She kissed me, and we picked up where we left off. It was passion filled and romantic. Most of all, it was complete ecstasy. It was just like the first time. As I got to know every inch of Olivia once again, I knew in my heart that everything about what we were doing was right.

  After all passion had faded, I wrapped my arms around her and kissed the back of her neck. That’s when she asked the question that was most on my mind.

  “What does all this mean?”

  “Whatever you want it to,” I answered.

  “I’m not the only one here. What do you want?”

  “You. I don’t care how. I just want us again. Can we make that happen?”

  “Tell me how you envision our lives.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Tell me what will happen if I leave my husband. How will the rest of my life go?”

  “You’ll leave him, and he’ll hate me. Richard will probably even hate you for a while. He’ll stay involved in his son’s life, though. After everything is settled in that area, we’ll get a place here in town. It’ll probably be an apartment for now, but that’s not where we’ll be staying permanently. There was a place on the lake that you always wanted. I’ll find a way to buy that land and pay someone to build the exact house you always dreamed of. While that’s being done, I’ll take you out on dates again, bring you flowers and gifts for no apparent reason, and make love to you every single night. I’ll also endear myself to Phillip. I’ll make him understand that I know I can never be his dad but that I’m someone who can make his mom happy. It won’t happen all at once, but I’ll find a way to be his friend and a third parent. I’m hoping that by the time the house is built we’ll be friends.

  After that, we’ll move in. Our friends and some of our family members will have some nasty things to say about us, considering I will have broken up a marriage, but I’ll make ou
r relationship into an honest one just a few weeks after we move into our dream home. I’ll ask you to marry me in the grandest way. I’m not going to tell you how because I don’t want to spoil it. After that, we’ll live our lives together as happily as we used to. Instead of being that person you described earlier who couldn’t act like the girl I used to know, you’ll realize that a life was always possible where laughter, love, and passion were a given. I’ll have my best friend beside me all the time, and I’ll never want for anything again. We’ll go ice-skating in the winters behind the house and raise Phillip together. Eventually, we’ll get a surprise. You’ll find out that you’re pregnant, but this time when you tell me, I’ll be ready. I’ll want that kid like I’ve never wanted anything besides her mother,” I said.

  “Her?”

  “Yeah, I think so. Then we’ll raise our daughter. She’ll have your blue eyes and sense of humor. We’ll raise her the way we both wished we had been. Money or accomplishments won’t be my number one priority like it was for my parents, and she won’t grow up seeing her mom and dad fight like you had to.

  As time goes by, the kids will leave the house, and we’ll realize that we’re getting old. We’ll temporarily panic. Without the kids we love, we’ll lash out at each other. It’ll be so hard to let go of them that we’ll have to lash out at someone just to deal with it. Slowly but surely, I’ll remember what really matters, though. I’ll remember that this all started with you. I’ll take you out on dates again like when we were sixteen and spend all the energy I used with the kids on you. In time, you’ll be able to let go, too. We’ll see that it’s a good thing that they grew up into such good and independent people. We will have done a good job, and it’ll be our time for each other. We’ll grow closer every single day. When I’m seventy and we’re both so wrinkled that we barely look like ourselves, I’ll realize something. In that moment, I’ll find you more attractive than I ever have. I’ll love you more, even though I didn’t think that was possible back when I was telling you this story. We’ll get sick, and we’ll forget who we are some of the time after that, but we won’t forget what we feel for each other. That will always be the constant in our lives.

  I don’t know when it will happen, but one day, I’ll be lying on a hospital bed with you holding my hand. I’ll be dying. As I’m leaving the world, I’ll still be trying to cling to any sign of life, though, because I’ll know in my heart that no matter how great Heaven might be, it can’t compare to my worst day with the woman who meant everything to me. I won’t be able to stay, though. All I’ll be able to do is smile at the thought of every memory I made with you. I’ll know I was the luckiest man to live on this earth because I got to make a life with someone who truly was my soul mate when most people never even get to find someone half as beautiful and completely captivating as you.”

  “I’ll give you this. You can still tell a good story.”

  “It’s not just a story. It’s our life, if we want it to be. I know I do. The only question now is what you want.”

  “You know exactly what I want. It’s always been you, Eric. It isn’t that simple, though. There are things you don’t know. I’ve got to tell you something, and you’re probably going to hate me for it . . .” Olivia managed to say before we heard the front door open.

  She looked at me with fear in her eyes. Even if we were going to be together, this wasn’t how either of us wanted to do it. Having Richard walk in was just about the worst way to do this.

  “Hide in the bathroom,” she whispered and grabbed her clothes.

  I nodded and grabbed my things. I ran into the bathroom and put my clothes on. Then I jumped into the shower. I closed the curtain and sat down just in case Richard came in. Sure enough, he did. As he rinsed his face off, I took a quick peek out from behind the curtain. He looked dirty and worn down from his job at the factory. In that moment, I felt guilty. I didn’t like the guy, but I was ruining his life. Everything he had been working for was about to be gone. It almost seemed too cruel. Then again, the life I envisioned with Olivia was worth hurting anyone I had to. A part of me wanted to get it over with right there. I could step out of the shower and reveal myself. I could tell him everything, and Olivia and I could start our lives right then. I knew that would be selfish, though. He deserved to find out in an easier way, and it was really Olivia’s choice to decide on how to tell him. I decided to simply hide in that shower, and I had to hide for a while. After nearly an hour, Olivia came and got me.

  “That was too close. You’ve got to go,” she said.

  “What are you talking about? I can’t leave now. Why was he even here, and you said that you wanted to tell me something. What was it?”

  “He came home for lunch. Richard doesn’t normally do that, but he wanted to see me. He was surprised to see your car out front and more than a little suspicious. I told him that your uncle came over, which isn’t a rare occurrence. I’ve become friends with him. I said he brought your old car and it wouldn’t crank, so he got Kristen to come get him. Richard thinks that Gary’s just getting a part and coming back to fix it. I don’t think he believed me at first, but he did a little walkthrough of the house, including the bathroom you were hiding in. I was scared to death when he came in here. When he didn’t find any sign of you, he took what I was saying as truth. He can’t ever know you were in town, though. Avoid him at all cost while you’re here. As for the other thing, I shouldn’t have said that. You just need to go.”

  “Hold on a second. I really want the life I described to you earlier. Don’t you?”

  “Yeah, I do. I’m just really confused right now. I think I need some space. Can we just pretend that this didn’t happen for a while? I have to figure out what I need to do, and having you press me for answers right now isn’t going to help.”

  “So that’s it? You just want me to leave until when? How will I even know when you make your decision? This isn’t fair. I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you, and I’m right here telling you that I’ll still do anything for you. You’ve got to give me something, though. I can’t wait forever. I’ve been going crazy over the last four years knowing that you’re with someone else. Make a life with me now, or put me out of my misery, and let me know that it’s never going to happen.”

  “I’m sorry, Eric. It can’t happen. I’ve messed things up too badly for it to.”

  “What does that even mean?”

  “It means you need to go back to Miami and fix things with Chastity before it’s too late. This was a mistake. It was a beautiful mistake, and I still love you, but it wasn’t right. No one can ever know about it.”

  “Are you really sending me away? You’re smarter than this, Olivia. Why would you waste what we could have?”

  “Because I don’t have a choice. Please, don’t make this harder on me. It’s bad enough sending away the man I love. I don’t need him trying to change my mind.”

  “If that’s what you really think, then goodbye, Olivia,” I said and walked out.

  In that moment, I was done with her. I had given her everything I had and come up empty. I was confused, and I didn’t want to go, but I felt like I had no choice. I wish I could go back to that place and make a different decision. She made it clear that she didn’t want to be with Richard. She wanted me, but something was holding her back. If only I had known then what I know now. I might have been able to say the words that would change everything.

  After I left the house, I called Chastity. Surprisingly, she answered.

  “Hey, we need to talk,” she said.

  “I know. I’m in Green Bay with my aunt and uncle right now, but I’m coming home soon.”

  “I’m sorry. I should have supported you. I was just shocked. Can you forgive me?” Chastity asked.

  “Yeah. I’m sorry for not being the man you thought I was. Let’s just start over. I’ll come home, and I’ll tell you everything about my past and where I want to go in the future. I’m a better person than I used to be, Chastity, and
I don’t want to throw away what we have because of something I did a long time ago.”

  That actually wasn’t true. I didn’t have any desire to marry her then. I had just left the woman I wanted to marry. What else was I going to do, though? Olivia had sent me away. Nothing was changing in that area. I had to live my life with someone who wanted to share it with me.

  Over the next few months, a lot would happen. I went home, and Chastity forgave me. We set our wedding date for December 2nd. It seemed like life couldn’t be better to people on the outside. Even the scandal surrounding Emmitt and me faded away like yesterday’s news. Then, on a cold November night, I got a call, and everything in my life stopped. Tragedy had struck, and I would have never thought it, but a secret was about to be revealed that would change everything.

  Chapter 31

  My Uncle’s Secret

  November

  All the wedding planning had been done, and Chastity and I were as happy as we could be. She was ecstatic, and I was doing okay for someone who had just cheated on his fiancée a few months earlier with the woman who should have been standing beside him at the alter. Here’s the truth. I wasn’t satisfied at all, but I thought Chastity was my only chance at happiness. She didn’t need to know what I had done in Wisconsin. It would only hurt her. She needed me to be the man who loved her, and I needed her to replace something that I had lost much longer ago than I cared to admit.

  As we sat in our apartment on a still sunny Miami winter day, I got a phone call from my aunt. I never expected to hear what she told me.

  “Hello,” I said.

  “Eric, I need to tell you something. Your . . .” she managed to say before I heard her burst into tears.

  “What’s going on, Aunt Kristen? Are you okay?”

  “No, I’m not.”

  “Is it Uncle Gary?”

  I don’t know how I knew it was him, but I just did. His health hadn’t been good since his first heart attack, and I knew it was only a matter of time, but I still thought we had many more years together.