Sinful Illusions

by Morgan James

  Damn her for doing this—for making me feel. I was going to fuck these emotions out of me if killed both of us.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Eva

  I was torn from a deep sleep when a huge hand wrapped around my ankle, and I let out a startled yelp as I was dragged toward the foot of the bed. Rolling onto my back, my gaze connected with Fox’s. It took several seconds for my muddled mind to bring his gaze fully into focus as I came awake. His face was dark with fury, his jaw set in a firm line as he glared down at me. Automatically on guard, instinct bubbled to the surface, and I kicked out at him.

  He let out a roar of anger but instead of releasing me, his fingers clenched more tightly around my ankle, and he ripped me from the bed. I landed hard on my back, a grunt escaping my lips as the wind was knocked out of me. My chest ached as I dragged in a breath, and rage consumed me as I forced my muscles to move. “Goddamn it, Fox! What the fuck are you doing?”

  Not bothering to respond, Fox reached down and fisted one hand in my hair. I shrieked as pain exploded across my scalp. Forced into moving or risk having my hair ripped from its roots, I scrambled to my feet and stumbled along beside him as he guided me through the door connecting our rooms.

  Gritting my teeth against the pain, I let out a relieved breath when he thrust me facedown on the bed and released me. I whipped around to look at him as he stripped out of his dark jacket and tossed it in the direction of the chair to his right. He didn’t bother to look; his dark, piercing gaze remained fixed on me, his brows drawn slightly together in anger.

  A combination of confusion and anger welled up, rendering me motionless. What the hell had happened over the past few hours? He’d been cold when he left this evening, but this was extreme, even for him.

  “What the hell is wrong with you?”

  Without a word, his hands moved to the hem of my shirt and ripped it over my head, leaving me in my panties. No fucking way was he going to drag me out of bed in the middle of the night, then try to fuck me without some kind of explanation.

  I planted my palms on his chest and shoved as hard as I could, but it was like trying to move a brick wall. He snatched my wrists in his huge hands and shoved me away. The back of my legs collided with the bed, and I bounced when my butt hit the mattress. I fought his hold, glaring up at him, but he moved between my legs, forcing more of his weight over top of me. It was too much; he was too angry, too out of control. He liked it rough, but he wasn’t himself right now. Tumultuous as our relationship was, I’d always been a consensual partner. Right now, though, his eyes were feral and wicked, and I couldn’t bear the thought of being raped, whether he was aware of what he was doing or not.

  My breath heaved in and out of my lungs as I wriggled my body backward on the bed, trying to put some distance between us. When that didn’t work, I screamed as loud as I could, hoping to break the spell of angry silence.

  He froze, his hands still curled around my wrists as he stared down at me.

  “I asked you a question!” I glared up at him, trying to shake free of his hold. “You sent me to my room earlier, but now you’re seeking me out when you want sex? Who the fuck do you think you are?”

  “You want to know what’s wrong with me?” His arm whipped forward, and his fingers curled around my throat as he forced me to my back on the mattress. “You. You’re driving me out of my goddamn mind.”

  Me? My mouth dropped open, and I was momentarily stunned into silence. All things considered, I’d been relatively well-behaved recently. “What the hell did I do?”

  Fox released me and immediately reached for the waistband of my panties. I grabbed for the material, kicking at his hands, but he tore the fragile fabric from my body, then delivered a stinging slap to my left ass cheek.

  “You’ve ruined me, you little bitch.”

  That was the last thing I expected, and I halted my movements as he stared hungrily at my naked body. I couldn’t tell if I was offended by him calling me a bitch or if I was surprised at his venom-filled words.

  “I can’t think about anything but you. The second I pull out of your tight little cunt, the only thing I want to do is slide back in. I can’t even be with another woman without thinking of you.”

  For a brief moment, his words filled me with a deep satisfaction—knowing that he desired me as much as I wanted him. A fraction of a second later, cold washed over my skin as the rest of his sentence sank in.

  “Other women?” I couldn’t help the incredulousness that crept into my tone, and Fox glared at me.

  “Where did you think I went tonight?”

  Lying naked beneath him, a white hot fury rushed through me, radiating outward and setting my nerve endings on fire. He was out with another woman tonight? Oh, hell no. With a flurry of movement, I kicked and punched at him, screaming at the top of my lungs. “Are you fucking kidding me? You’re coming to me after you were with someone else? I’m not your goddamn whore!”

  If he thought he could go fuck some other woman, then come to me with his dick still dripping with her juices, he was sorely mistaken. I lifted my torso and sank my teeth into the hand binding my wrists. He abruptly released me with a sharp expletive and shook his hand as if to dispel the pain. Shooting to my feet, I slammed my hands against his chest. “You motherfucker! I hate you!”

  “Shut the fuck up!” He growled low in his throat as he lunged forward and grabbed me around the waist.

  Fox easily overpowered me, forcing me back onto the bed before straddling my hips. Wrestling my arms, he pinned them, one by one, down by my side. With Fox’s muscular thighs squeezing me tight and pressing me into the mattress, I was completely at his mercy. My only remaining weapon was my raging anger. “I’m not some sex toy to use and discard at your convenience!”

  He slapped one huge hand over my face, covering my nose and mouth, then leaned so close that I could feel the heat of his breath when he spoke. “You are more trouble than you’re worth. I should’ve gotten rid of you when I had the chance.” Dark eyes still glaring at me, his free hand moved to my breast, and I winced as he fondled it roughly, his fingers digging into my flesh.

  “Now that I’ve had you, though… it’s completely fucked with my head. I held her, but all I could feel were your curves beneath my hands. When I kissed her, all I could taste was you.”

  The thought of him with another woman was enough to make me sick, and bile rose up my throat. A pang of irrational hurt ricocheted through my chest, and tears welled in my eyes, burning across the bridge of my nose.

  “I tried so goddamn hard. Tried to forget you. Tried to convince myself it was a fluke.” He shook his head as he squeezed my face tighter. “I couldn’t even get it up, for Christ’s sake. And it’s all your fault. I walk around with a hard-on half the goddamn time, just thinking about when I can sink into your sweet pussy. You’re on my mind every fucking second of the day, and for some insane reason I only want you.” He took a breath, his head shaking slightly as if he couldn’t quite believe it himself. “I found myself comparing her to you—and falling short in every way.”

  During the time he’d spoken, I’d stopped moving completely, shocked into stillness at his words. Despite my fury that he’d gone out with the intention of finding another woman to take to bed, he’d come home instead. To me.

  “I’ve never felt this way before, so crazy for a woman. Only you.” Fox lifted his hand away from my face and allowed his fingers to coast over my throat, down my sternum. My nipples peaked into hard points as he reached the valley right between my breasts. With his large hands, he cupped the round globes, pushing them together, thumbing the taut pink tips until I was crying out. “You know what I’ve decided?”

  Heat pooled in my core as I half-listened to him, mindless with pleasure. Whatever it was, I hoped it would end with him fucking me. I bucked my hips in response, and he chuckled, a dark sound.

  “Oh, angel.” He tweaked my nipples hard, and a scream ripped from my throat as my back arched a
t the sensation. He released me and leaned forward. “These feelings have to go away eventually. I’ll just fuck you until they do.”

  Oh, God. Yes, please. I licked my lips as I stared up at him, vision hazy with lust. “Do it.”

  “Don’t fucking tempt me, angel.” He curled his fingers into my breasts, and my mouth contorted under the sharp bite of pain.

  Instead of dampening my desire, fire erupted along my nerve endings, and I bucked my hips toward him. “You want me,” I taunted. “Take me. You know you want to.”

  He took my mouth in a brutal kiss, our teeth clashing under the force of it. His tongue rolled over mine, stoking, sucking, and I pulled against the almost bruising grip he had on my wrists.

  Without breaking the kiss, he shifted his legs wider, freeing my hands. Seemingly of their own volition, they immediately moved to the front of his shirt. I flicked the buttons from their holes, tearing a few off in my haste to get him undressed. As soon as the edges of his shirt gaped open, I slipped my hands over his shoulders, shoving the fabric down his arms. He struggled out of the shirt while I attacked his belt, pulling it free of its loops. I managed to get him fully unzipped by the time his shirt hit the floor. Fabric hanging around his hips, Fox slid off the bed and shoved his pants the rest of the way down, then left them in a puddle as he lunged for me again. My knees lifted, gripping his hips tightly as my arms wound around his neck, my fingers sinking into his hair.

  “You’re mine, Eva,” he growled, palming my ass. “You’ll never belong to anyone but me.”

  I gasped as he slapped my left cheek, then massaged it. It didn’t hurt, but the stinging sensation was just forceful enough to turn me on, make me want more. That sharp little bite of pain always came before intense pleasure, and my body needed it like I needed air to breathe.

  He spanked me again, in the very same spot, and I sank my teeth into my lower lip as I closed my eyes. I let out a little whimper as his erection rubbed right over the sensitive bundle of nerves at my entrance. I needed him inside me, needed him to fill me up.

  “Fox.” I cracked my eyes open and met his own dark irises, hot with feral need. Curling my fingers into his biceps, I pressed myself toward him. “Fuck me. Make me yours.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Fox

  Our mouths collided in another hot, needy kiss, and I ran my hands over every inch of her that I could reach. Touching her ignited a fire within me that only she could extinguish. My cock brushed through her hot, slick folds, and heat curled low in my belly, my arousal swelling at the feel of her.

  I slipped one hand between our bodies, coasting down to her slick center. Parting her folds with my fingers, I dipped inside. “Fuck, angel, you’re soaked.”

  Eva let out a sound somewhere between a sigh and a moan. “Fox…”

  Pulling my hand free, I lined the head of my cock up with her entrance and grabbed onto her hip hard enough to leave bruises. She cried out as I plunged forward, thrusting deep inside with one smooth stroke. Her pussy clasped me tight, the muscles pulsing as they accommodated my intrusion. I held myself there for a brief moment, reveling in the rightness of it before withdrawing and slamming back inside her.

  Feeling her contract around me was like watching a piece of a puzzle fall into place. It was absolute perfection, the way we fit together—hard to soft, darkness to light. She tossed her head back, hands clamping down on my arms as I fucked her hard and deep. She was already so close, I knew it wouldn’t take much to push her over.

  Sliding my arms under her legs, I arranged her so that her legs were spread wide, the underside of her knees settled in the crook of my elbows. Still deep inside her, I leaned forward, folding her almost in half. Her pussy tightened as the position forced her to take me deeper, and an expression of sheer bliss contorted her face. I withdrew slightly then plunged forward, filling every inch of her and eliciting a sharp cry.

  In this position, I was pressed right up against her swollen clit, and I used it to my advantage. Rubbing against it as I moved in and out of her, I could feel the swell of her walls as she hurtled toward orgasm. She let out a keening moan as her pussy spasmed hard around me, the muscles of her sheath rippling as she came. Her muscles gripped me tightly, urging me to come, too, and I couldn’t hold back a second longer.

  Gritting my teeth, I slammed into her with as much force as I could, the tingling in my lower body spreading and shifting into sexual bliss as I emptied my seed inside her. For a long moment, I held myself there, wanting to suspend the moment. Pulling out of her was almost painful, and I did so slowly before collapsing to the bed.

  Next to me, a tiny tremor ran through Eva’s body—remnants of her pleasure, I guessed. My body was still humming as I lay there, waiting for my heart to calm and my breathing to return to normal. My eyes fixed on Eva, I watched as she yanked the comforter over herself and curled into a little ball just a few feet from me.

  A strange sensation, like drunken butterflies battering my insides, took up residence, and my brows drew together as she snuggled into the pillow. “What are you doing, angel?”

  “Going to sleep.”

  Her voice was already drowsy, but we’d never slept together before—I’d never slept with any woman before. And I had no idea how I felt about Eva lying next to me all night long.

  “I’m not a cuddler,” I said flatly, hoping she would take the hint and go to her own bed.

  “Me, either,” she replied on a yawn.

  My eyes narrowed, and I waited for her to get up but she never did. About a minute later, her breathing changed, and I knew she was out. Motherfucker. I turned to stare at the darkened ceiling, wondering not for the first time what the fuck I was doing. How had everything spiraled so quickly? I had a feeling things were never going to be the same again.

  I had two choices: I could either let her stay since she was already asleep, or I could carry her back to bed where she belonged. I was tempted to do the latter, but I was exhausted both mentally and physically and I didn’t want to move. Or so I told myself. Closing my eyes, I tried to ignore the body of the woman next to me.

  I dozed off and on all night long and awoke just before dawn. Rolling my head to the side, I threw a look at Eva. True to her word, she’d stayed on her side of the bed, an arm’s length away. Why, then, was I tempted to reach out and draw her to me? My dick throbbed with need despite our intense bout of sex late last night, and I reached between the sheets to stroke it. My morning wood protested at the feel of my hand, aching to be buried deep inside of Eva instead. But I’d already crossed one boundary last night. If the lines became any more blurred, they would disappear altogether. I needed this last wall between us. If she wormed her way under my skin, there would be no getting rid of her then. To my horror, the thought didn’t scare me as much as it should have.

  I slipped from the bed, taking care to make sure Eva stayed covered up, and strode into the closet. I dressed quickly, wanting—needing—to avoid Eva at all costs. Slipping out of the room, I made my way first to the kitchen where Carmen greeted me with a warm smile.

  “Good morning, Mr. Fox.”

  “Morning.” I headed straight for the coffee pot calling my name.

  “You look tired,” she observed from behind me.

  I didn’t typically welcome comments like that from my staff, but Carmen was different. “I didn’t sleep well,” I admitted.

  “Out late?”

  “No. Just tossed and turned.” I hesitated for a minute as I stared out the windows that overlooked the back yard. “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Of course.” She set down the skillet she’d pulled out and met my gaze.

  “I was wondering…” How did I go about asking this—and why the hell did I even want to? I framed it up in the most generic way possible. “What would you do if you knew something was bad for you, but you wanted it anyway?”

  A knowing light entered her eyes as she stared at me, reading between the lines. “Some things in life we�
�re drawn to because they tempt us. They’re forbidden, and we like the chase. Those things often lead down a dark and dangerous path. Other times”—she folded her hands on top of each other and rested them on the counter—“we are drawn to things that we truly desire. These are the hardest to reconcile because we feel we don’t deserve them.”

  I gave a tight little nod. “Thank you, Carmen.”

  From her spot near the stove, she studied me. “Remember, Mr. Fox—there is nothing you’re not worthy of.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that, couldn’t even begin to process something so wise—and untrue. I most certainly wasn’t worthy of Eva. Would that ever change? I seriously doubted it. Escaping Carmen’s searching eyes, I headed to the back of the house and into the sanctuary of my office. Rodrigo was just coming around the corner as I ducked inside, and he followed me in.

  “Sir, I have news.”

  “What is it?” I sank into my chair and took a long drink of coffee, waiting for the jolt of alertness to hit my bloodstream.

  “I believe I know when the shipment will be arriving.”

  “Show me what you found.”

  Rodrigo picked up a few documents I assumed he’d placed on my desk last night while I was gone. He directed my attention to a printout of an online conversation between four participants. “They’re using code words, but it matches up to previous conversations we were able to find. They reference a ‘little phoebe’ in each of these.”

  My vision went red at the name. “Is that a person?”

  “I thought so at first, but then I checked the dates again.” He picked up a new folder and flipped it open, then handed it to me. He pointed to the timestamps printed along the left side of the paper. “These are dated October thirteenth. And these”—he flipped to a new page—“are from late August. I thought it was strange that they would reference the same woman in all three conversations, so I did some digging. A ‘little phoebe’ is listed as the sum of four and one.”