She slammed the rear door of the utility vehicle, then kicked the door to the garage shut behind her. When she put the last two bags down, she counted
"…fifteen, sixteen, seventeen bags? These boys know how to eat."
Before starting to unload everything, she tossed another load of laundry into the washer. She'd barely gotten the frozen food into the freezer when the phone rang.
She juggled bags of apples in one hand and reached for the receiver with the other.
"Hello, Haynes residence," she said, tucking the phone between her head and shoulder and trying to remember what she'd planned for dinner that night. Did she need to make a salad?
"Jill, it's Kim. Are you still speaking to me?"
Jill set the apples on the counter and bumped the refrigerator door closed. She leaned against the kitchen wall by the phone and sighed. "Kim. I wondered when I'd hear from you."
"Are you mad?"
"Not exactly." She sank onto the sparkling floor. The service she'd hired had sent four cleaning people over. They'd gone through the house like a plague of locusts and had finished in three hours. It would have taken her two, maybe three days.
As she closed her eyes and drew in a breath, she inhaled the scent of pine cleaner and lemon furniture polish.
Her friend sighed. "I'm really sorry. I should have told you the truth, but I knew if I did, you'd say no and then I couldn't go get married and, Jill, I feel so bad."
Amazingly, Kim got that out in one long breath. "Not bad enough," Jill said.
"So you are mad."
"No, but I would have liked to have known what I was getting into. Mr. Haynes thought he was hiring a full-time nanny, and I thought I was baby-sitting for a couple of nights."
"But it can't be too awful. You took the job."
"You didn't leave me a lot of choice. The poor man was desperate."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't keep apologizing. I'm not upset." She glanced around at the piles of laundry yet to be folded and the groceries she had to put away. Her gaze strayed to the clock and she realized she had to leave in less than an hour to pick up Danny and C.J. at school.
"This job might be good for me," she said slowly. "At least I don't have to worry about finding a place when you come home from your honeymoon. This job will give me time to think."
"So you don't hate me?"
"No, I don't. How was the wedding?"
"Wonderful. And the honeymoon is even better. Oh, Jill, Brian is everything I dreamed he would be. I can't believe I put off getting married to him for so long. Every day is better than the one before. He's thoughtful and tender. My heart beats faster when he comes into the room. And the sex—"
"Spare me the details," Jill said quickly. "I'll use my imagination."
Kim laughed. "Then you'd better have a good one because—"
"Kim!"
"Okay, I won't tease you anymore." Her friend was silent for a moment. "I do appreciate all you've done. Without you reminding me what was really important, I wouldn't have married Brian."
"You were there for me. When I realized I couldn't stand it anymore, you gave me a place to run to," Jill said. "I owed you. Now we're even."
"How are the boys?"
"Interesting. Very different from Patti and Heather. But I like them."
Over the phone line she heard the sound of a door opening. Kim called her husband over. There was a breath of silence, then a soft giggle.
"Sounds like you two have plans," Jill said. "I'll talk to you when you get back."
"Definitely. We want to have you over for dinner."
"Sounds great. Bye." She hung up the receiver.
Despite the bags of groceries that needed to be emptied, she sat on the floor a little longer. She envied Kim her happiness. Jill tried to remember the last time she'd been excited about a man. She had been married to Aaron for five years, but the thrill wore off very quickly. Had she expected too much, or had she sensed that he was holding back something of himself?
Funny that she never thought about leaving him. Of course, he'd gone out of his way to make her feel obligated to the girls. Maybe that was his way of making sure she was around. Sometimes she felt as if Aaron had played her the way an experienced fisherman plays with a prize bass. Reeling her in slowly, teasing her with just enough line so that the hook sank in deep.
She stood up and put away the rest of the groceries. She glanced at the clock, then made a batch of quick bread. The timer on the oven would turn the heat off at the right time, so it wouldn't overcook. Then she grabbed her purse and keys and headed out to the garage.
Five minutes later she pulled up in front of the school. She joined a long line of cars filled with mothers waiting for their children.
She watched the smiling kids run toward their parents. There hadn't been a lot of laughter in her house when she was growing up. Before the divorce, her parents had fought constantly. After the divorce, they'd spent their time thinking up ways to torment each other. Usually she was the preferred method, each parent playing her against the other. Once she'd grown up and escaped, she'd been willing to do anything to belong to a family, even turn a blind eye to Aaron's real motive for marrying her.
Before she could question her gullibility, she glanced up and saw two boys racing toward the vehicle. They were laughing, and she couldn't help but smile back.
She unlocked the car and they tumbled inside. Danny took the front seat. C.J. had had it that morning.
"How was your day?" she asked and waited until they'd put on their seat belts before starting the engine.
"Great," C.J. said. "I've got to do a science project."
"Wonderful," she thought, fighting back a groan. She had a mental picture of a pudding-filled volcano exploding in her freshly cleaned kitchen.
"What about you, Danny?"
Craig's youngest frowned. "I wanna play Pee-Wee ball, but Daddy won't practice with me. He said he would this weekend, but he was gone."
"Your father is working on something special right now. It's important for him to be gone. But he thinks about you and misses you. As soon as he can, he'll start spending more time at home." She paused, wondering if either boy would ask how she knew this bit of in formation. She didn't, exactly. She was assuming. Because Craig was a decent guy and he genuinely seemed to care about his kids.
"You don't have to practice," C.J. said. "Everyone gets on a team."
"I know." Danny blew his bangs out of his eyes. "But I don't want to be on a baby team. I wanna be good."
"Not a problem," Jill said, glancing at him. "We'll help you."
Danny made a face that said he wasn't impressed with the offer.
"I'll have you know that I'm a very good Pee-Wee ball player," she said.
C.J. looked at her and grinned. "You're lying. You've never played Pee-Wee ball."
"Well, I could if I wanted to."
Danny laughed. "You're too big."
"There's a first," she said. "Okay, maybe I haven't played Pee-Wee ball, but I can still help. Your brothers can, too. You'll see, Danny. You'll do great."
"I'll help the kid out," C.J. said. "But Ben won't. He just watches TV or plays video games after school."
Jill didn't like the sound of that. Children needed to get outside and run around. When she'd been a child, she'd often escaped outside to get away from her parents. There, in a tree house, she'd been able to pretend she was somewhere else – in a place where people cared about each other.
She turned the corner and stopped behind the school bus. It turned on its flashing red lights as children began to step down. Ben was one of the last ones off. None of the other children spoke to him as they walked away in groups of twos and threes.
Jill stared at the boy. He had his father's good looks, but he needed to lose weight. His whole body shook when he walked. She frowned, wondering if she was qualified to deal with this problem. Then she realized Ben didn't have anyone else right now. She was going to have to do her best a
nd pray that it was enough.
When he was in the car, she signaled and pulled away from the curb.
"How was your day?" she asked brightly, glancing at him in the rearview mirror.
He looked out the side window and didn't meet her gaze. "Dumb."
"Okay." She thought for a moment, trying to plan the afternoon. It was staying lighter longer so there would be plenty of time. "What's the homework situation for everyone?"
"I don't have any," C.J. said quickly.
"Me, either," Danny piped in.
Ben didn't bother answering.
"No one has homework?" They all shook their heads. "Interesting. No homework on a Monday night. Gee, I'm very surprised. I thought everyone would have some homework. But if you say you don't have any, no problem."
They were all lying, she thought, fighting a grin. But she knew how to fix them. She turned on the radio and found one of those stations playing elevator music. The kind with twenty-year-old songs sung by a no-name group. She turned the radio up just loud enough to be annoying, then joined in.
Her natural inclination was to sing off-key and this time she didn't fight it. She sang right along, loudly, making up words if she didn't know them.
The boys stared at each other in disbelief. C.J. clasped his hands around his neck and made a choking sound.
"Jill?" Danny said. "Why are you singing like that?"
"Because I want to. If you don't have homework, then there's plenty of time to listen to my singing. I'm going to take the long way home."
"I've got word lists and a math page," Danny said quickly.
"Really?" she said, sounding surprised.
"I've got Spanish and history," Ben said.
She looked at C.J. in the mirror. He smiled. "Okay, maybe some math and spelling."
She clicked off the radio. "Ah, the truth at last. Okay, here's the plan. We're going to have a snack and do homework for a half hour, then we'll help Danny with his Pee-Wee tryouts. Then, if there's any homework left, it can be done after dinner."
"I don't want to," Ben said.
Jill raised her eyebrows. "Which part doesn't appeal to you?"
"Helping the pip-squeak. I'm gonna watch TV."
"But, Ben, you're the oldest. I would have thought you would want to help your brother out. Don't you play Little League?"
"Not anymore," C.J. said and puffed up his cheeks. "Lard-o is too fat."
Before she could say anything, Ben launched himself at his younger brother. C.J. grabbed him and they started wrestling together. Jill glanced at the street signs. They were only about three blocks from home, but she wanted to prove a point. She pulled to the side of the road and put the car in park.
Danny stared at her. She gave him a wink. In the back seat the boys were grunting and squirming. After a couple of minutes, Ben looked up.
"Aren't you gonna stop us?"
Jill shrugged.
C.J. looked around. "Why'd you pull over here?"
"Because you're acting like animals. It's not safe to drive with loose animals in the car. If you want to settle down, we'll go home. If not, we'll sit here. Oh, look at that girl," she said, pointing to a pretty blonde who was about ten years old. Jill rolled down the window and waved.
"Don't do that," C.J. said from the back of the car. "She'll see you."
"That's the point," Jill said, still smiling and waving. The girl waved back uncertainly.
C.J. groaned and slunk down in his seat. "Please stop."
"Are you two done?" she asked. "If so, then you can apologize, promise not to do it again and we'll leave."
"I'm sorry," C.J. said quickly. "Real sorry. I'll never wrestle with Ben in the car again. I swear!"
She glanced over her shoulder at Ben and raised her eyebrows. "How long do you think it will be until someone you know comes along?"
"I'm sorry, too," he said. "I won't do it again."
"Perfect."
Jill rolled up the window, put the car in drive and headed for home. The last quarter mile was blissfully silent.
After she'd parked in the garage, the boys climbed out. C.J. paused in front of her. "You're not like our other nannies," he said.
"I'm not surprised. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"
He grinned. "I'll get back to you."
* * *
"I want one more slice," Danny whined, inching closer to the counter.
"Me, too," Ben said, stacking his books on top of each other. The boys had been doing their homework at the kitchen table.
"After we practice and have dinner," Jill said. "You've had your snack already."
Danny eyed the sliced loaf on the counter. "But it was good."
"I'm glad you liked the prune bread. I—"
She stopped talking when she realized all three boys were staring at her. Their eyes widened and their mouths opened.
C.J. recovered first. "Prune bread?"
"Yes."
He fell to his knees and started choking. "I'm dying, I'm dying."
Ben followed his lead and dropped to the floor. He writhed in agony. "Prunes. Yuck. She's poisoning us."
Danny stared at his brothers, then her. He wasn't certain who he wanted to side with. Jill ignored his older brothers.
"Don't worry about it," she said. "It was delicious before you knew what it was. It's still delicious. Let's go outside and practice."
She held out her hand. Danny grabbed her fingers. They started for the door. "I know how many slices there were," she called over her shoulder. "So don't even think about sneaking any."
It was warmer today, but still sweatshirt weather. The sky was a brilliant California blue. Tall trees reached for the heavens. The green leaves seemed brighter in the afternoon light, or maybe it was her mood. There was nothing like taking care of three boys to give her something other than herself to think about. Jill wondered if that was part of her problem. She'd had too much free mental time on her hands.
By the time she'd dug out a couple of mitts and a bat, the other two boys had joined them. She didn't comment on Ben's appearance, not wanting to make a big deal of it, but in her heart, she was pleased he wanted to participate.
She tossed them mitts, then found a couple of big plastic balls that wouldn't go far, and wouldn't do any damage if they hit something. Ben came over and took them from her. "I'll pitch," he said.
He'd pulled on a baseball cap. It hid most of his dark hair from view. He wore a loose sweatshirt and jeans. Her heart ached for him. She'd been out of place at home, but at least she'd been able to fit in at school. Ben carried his pain with him everywhere.
She gave him a quick smile and gently touched his cheek. He stiffened at the contact but didn't pull away. His dark gaze met hers. Some emotion flickered there. She couldn't read it, but she knew it was hurting him. She wanted to pull him close and hug him until he felt better, but she didn't have the right. Even if she did, Ben wouldn't let her. He was as prickly as a porcupine.
"Batter up," he called, moving to the center of the yard.
There was more room in the front than in the back, so that was where they played. Jill stayed in the background, filling in where she was needed. C.J. was fast and talented, with the grace of a natural athlete. Ben had the same raw ability, but his weight slowed him down. He could pitch with perfect precision, but he got winded if he tried to run the bases. Even six-year-old Danny could catch him.
Jill stared at the youngest of Craig Haynes's boys. Danny stood hunched over his bat, his face scrunched up in concentration. Ben released the ball. Danny swung and missed.
"Keep your eyes open," C.J. called from the outfield.
"I am."
"Then hit the dumb ball."
"I'm tryin'." Frustration filled Danny's voice, but he didn't give up. He tossed the ball back to Ben and hunched over again.
"Is he standing right?" she asked, coming up to stand behind him. "Maybe it's his shoulders."
Danny looked at her and grimaced. "It's not my should
ers. Ben and C.J. are better than me."
"They're also older and have had more practice. You're going to make it. You're determined, and sometimes that's more important than raw talent."
He beamed, then hunched over. Jill moved back and studied him. He didn't have his brothers' dark hair or eyes. He must take after his mother. Despite having checked on the cleaning crew while they worked and going into all the bedrooms to put clean laundry on the beds, she hadn't seen a picture of the boys' mother. While she was curious about Krystal Haynes, she wasn't comfortable with snooping.
Ben pitched again.
"Keep your eyes open," Jill called.
Danny swung hard. The bat cracked against the plastic ball and sent it sailing toward the heavens.
"You did it!" she said and clapped her hands. Danny tossed off his hat in celebration.
Ben jumped to snag the ball, but he missed.
"Jeez, fatty, can't you do anything?" C.J. said as he raced toward it. He caught the ball in his glove, went down on one knee, rolled onto his back and came up, still holding the ball in his glove. "Craig Haynes, Jr., wins the national championship." He bowed to an imaginary crowd.
Ben threw off his glove and started for the house.
"Ben," she called.
The boy kept walking. He stalked through the garage. She ran after him. "Ben, wait. I know C.J. is being a pain, but you're doing great. Please don't leave."
In the background, she heard a car pull up at the curb.
Ben turned to look at her. Tears swam in his eyes, but he blinked them back. "Go back where you came from. We don't need you here. We don't like you." With that, he opened the door to the family room and stepped into the house. The door slammed shut behind him.
"Daddy, Daddy!"
She turned and saw C.J. and Danny running toward their father. She hadn't seen Craig since Saturday night. He was gone when she woke up Sunday morning and didn't come home until after she went to bed.
He wore his uniform, but he'd left his hat inside his car. The sunlight caught the dark wavy hair. He was tall and broad, and for some reason, her heart began fluttering foolishly in her chest. She told herself it was just the uniform, or the strangeness of the situation. Maybe it was a bit of indigestion. Maybe she'd eaten her slice of prune bread too quickly.
PART-TIME WIFE Page 6
