It was even colder on the water, but by the time he’d rowed to Rose Cottage and tied the boat up to the dock, he was warm.
Ashley was waiting for him at the back door, a cup of coffee in hand. “Thought you might need this right away. You didn’t sound too alert on the phone.”
“I’d decided to sleep in,” he said, giving her a peck on the cheek and studying her curiously, looking for evidence of turmoil in her eyes. Her expression was perfectly bland.
“Why were you sleeping in?”
“Because I could.”
She laughed. “And I picked today to call at the crack of dawn. Sorry,” she said without much real evidence of regret.
“No problem. What’s up with you? You seem awfully cheerful this morning.”
She lifted her cup of coffee in a mock toast. “I am, actually. I quit my job.”
Josh blinked hard, sure he had to have heard wrong. A workaholic who’d just quit usually wasn’t quite so chipper. At least that explained the barely concealed note of hysteria he thought he’d detected in her voice earlier.
“When did you do that?”
“About an hour ago.”
“I thought you were going to take my advice and let things mull a while longer before making any decisions about the future.”
She shrugged. “Things change.”
“Such as?”
“My hand was forced,” she said succinctly. “I did what I had to do.”
“And you’re okay with that?”
“I’m sure the sheer terror will set in eventually, but yes, at the moment, I am ecstatic. I am feeling strong and in control.”
“I see. Mind telling me why you woke up at dawn and decided that the first thing you’d do this morning was to turn in your resignation?”
She gave him an apparently condensed version of what her sister had told her and her subsequent conversation with the senior partner in her law firm.
“How could I go on working for people like that?” she asked.
“You couldn’t,” Josh agreed without hesitation. He would have done the same thing. “I’m just surprised you didn’t wait till you had something else lined up.”
She shrugged. “So am I, but it seemed like the right thing to do at the time, so I went with the flow.”
His gaze narrowed. “You aren’t going to blame this on me later, are you?”
“How could I? You weren’t even here.”
“But the whole go-with-the-flow philosophy,” he re minded her. “I’ve been its biggest proponent around here.”
“And an excellent philosophy it is,” she said happily. “Trust me, it won’t come back to bite you in the butt, not even if I wind up destitute.”
“Good to know. Have you given any thought to what happens next?”
“No. I’m on vacation.”
“Actually, you’re out of work. It’s not exactly the same thing,” he said, though he had to admire her new attitude. She seemed to be embracing it with surprising enthusiasm. Unfortunately, he wasn’t buying the act for a minute.
She waved off his reminder. “Not going to worry about it today. Let’s go fishing.”
He nodded slowly. “Fishing it is.”
“I packed a lunch. I thought we could stay out a really long time.”
“Okay,” he said slowly. “Why?”
“Because once my family gets wind of this, they’re going to think I’ve lost my mind. I don’t do impulsive things. I don’t do much of anything except work. I’d rather not be around when they show up with a shrink.”
He laughed. “You may surprise them, but I doubt they’d go that far.”
She held out an obviously heavy picnic hamper and a cooler, then said grimly, “I’m not taking any chances.”
Ashley really appreciated Josh’s silence. Either he was in shock or he was showing amazing restraint. Whichever it was, at least he wasn’t pestering her with questions for which she had no answers.
They’d been out on the water for a couple of hours. He’d caught several fish that he declared to be too small. He’d tossed them back. Ashley hadn’t even felt a faint stirring of her usual competitive spirit, which suggested she was more shaken by the morning’s events than she’d realized.
“Josh?”
“Hmm?”
She nudged his foot. “Wake up.”
“I am awake.”
“Then look at me.”
He tilted his sunglasses down and peered at her over the top. “Yes?”
“Do you think I made a terrible mistake? Be honest.”
“Doesn’t matter what I think. Do you?”
“No.”
“Then there’s your answer.”
“Do you think any other firm in Boston will touch me after this?”
He appeared to give the question careful consideration. “That’s hard to say,” he replied eventually. “You’re a good lawyer with a fantastic track record. I’d think that once the publicity dies down, any firm would be happy to take you on.” He met her gaze. “Or you could start your own firm and capitalize on the notoriety.”
She shuddered at that idea. How could she take advantage of all the negative publicity, when that was exactly what she’d accused Wyatt of doing? It seemed sleazy and opportunistic. “Are you serious?”
“It’s just an option. I’m not making recommendations here, just tossing out ideas.”
“Any others?”
“You could always open a firm here,” he suggested.
His expression was casual, but she had the distinct impression that he’d given this particular option a lot of thought long before this morning’s turn of events. “Here? There are probably plenty of lawyers here now.”
“One or two,” he said, almost sounding as if he’d looked into it. “The area’s growing. You might not get rich, but you’d do okay.”
Stay here in the boondocks? The idea held more appeal than it might have when she’d first arrived, intending to endure her three-week banishment from Boston, but to stay forever? Wouldn’t she go nuts after a few months? A year at the outside? How challenging could the cases be? She’d be defending the occasional DUI charge or maybe a drug dealer. Those were not the kind of crimes on which she’d built her reputation. She’d handled the high-profile white-collar crime, the occasional sensational murder case. She would miss that.
Or would she? Having seen the dark side of that kind of law, was it still what she wanted? She honestly didn’t know. She wasn’t quite ready to turn her back on it, at least not without exploring all of her options.
“Maybe I could go to D.C.,” she suggested instead. “Or even Richmond.”
“You could,” he agreed, though he looked oddly disappointed by her response.
She studied him intently. “Josh, is there some reason you want me to stay here? Say, for the sake of speculation, that I did, are you thinking that we’d go on being together? Is that your agenda?”
He grinned at her careful phrasing. “The thought did cross my mind. It might give us time to find that suitable bed we keep talking about.”
It would also change the dynamics of everything. If she was leaving, she was free to indulge in a wildly passionate fling. If she was staying, then she’d be toying with a relationship. She didn’t think she’d be any good at that.
“I don’t know,” she said honestly. “I can’t base a decision about my entire professional future on what might or might not happen with the two of us.”
“I’m not asking you to. I’m just giving you some thing to consider while you’re weighing all those options.”
“I need to make a list,” she said, frustrated by the magnitude of the decisions facing her. She’d known all along that it would eventually come to this, but she’d avoided confronting it. Now she had to. No matter what Josh said to the contrary, proper decision-making required organization, not drifting around in a rowboat.
“Not today,” he chided. “The list is already dancing around in your head. It will sort
itself out if you give it enough time.”
“This is my life. I can’t just wait around for the stars to align or something,” she said impatiently. She could only do the go-with-the-flow thing for so long. As of seven o’clock this morning when she’d quit her job, it had outlived its usefulness.
He laughed. “Come here,” he urged.
She studied him suspiciously. “Why?”
“Just wriggle your sexy bottom over here next to me. Otherwise, I’ll just have to come over there.”
Filled with suspicion, she finally maneuvered until she was next to him. He put his arm around her.
“Rest your head right here,” he said, patting his shoulder.
After a moment’s hesitation, she leaned against his chest, tucked her head on his shoulder and heaved a sigh.
“That’s better,” he said. “Now close your eyes.”
“Why?”
“Because I said to.”
She bristled at that. “You’re not—”
“I know,” he said with amusement, cutting off her protest. “I am not the boss of you.”
“Right.”
“Just trust me. Close your eyes.”
She finally permitted her eyelids to drift shut.
“Clear your head,” he instructed. “Just concentrate on the sound of the water lapping against the boat, and on the sun on your face. Let everything else go.”
Out of sheer habit and stubbornness, she fought it, but eventually his soothing tone relaxed her and her mind finally slipped away to a calmer, more tranquil place.
“This isn’t so bad, is it?” he asked eventually, his voice low.
“What?” she murmured.
“Being here, with me, just existing in the moment.”
She smiled. “No,” she admitted, filled with wonder at just how right it felt. “It’s not bad at all.”
“Then why would you give it up one second before you have to?” he asked.
Good question, she thought, right before she snuggled more tightly against him. Why give up something that felt this right? She’d eventually have to think about that, worry it to death, in all probability, but not right now. In fact, it could wait till later.
She sighed happily. Much, much later.
10
To Ashley’s dismay, the entire D’Angelo family was waiting at Rose Cottage when she and Josh got back late in the afternoon. She scowled at Jo. “Your doing?”
“Don’t blame your sister,” her mother said, stepping forward to give her a fierce hug. “Your father and I decided it was time to come down here and give you some moral support. We booked a flight right after that awful morning newscast today. Jo tried to talk us out of it, but when we insisted, she refused to be left behind.”
She leaned back and searched Ashley’s face. “How are you holding up?”
To Ashley’s total chagrin, the sympathetic note in her mother’s voice was the last straw. She burst into tears. To her shock—and probably everyone else’s—it was Josh who stepped forward and tucked a finger under her chin.
“Want to go for a walk?” he asked solemnly. “Get your bearings?”
She looked into his eyes and felt the ground steady under her feet. What an amazing thing, that a man she’d known only a few days could have that effect on her. She’d have to explore the reasons for that later, when her entire family wasn’t standing around smirking. Her mother might be a bit perplexed by Josh’s presence, but if they hadn’t done so before, her sisters were probably now planning her wedding to the man.
Her father stepped up just then, and with a scowl in Josh’s direction, took his place. “You sure you’re okay, kitten?”
Hearing her childhood nickname that only her father had ever dared to call her almost brought on another round of tears, but she managed to blink them away and offer him a beaming smile.
“I’m fine,” she assured him, giving his hand a squeeze. Then she announced brightly, “Since everyone’s here and probably starved, let’s go out for crabs.” She linked an arm through her mother’s, hoping to wipe the worried frown off her face. “Remember Grandma’s favorite place? It was always our very first stop when we came in the summer.”
Her mother dutifully fell in with the obvious distraction, and for once her sisters even cooperated. Ashley glanced back at Josh and mouthed, “Thank you.”
He grinned. “Not a problem.” He turned and headed toward the water.
Ashley stopped in her tracks and stared after him. “Hey, Madison, where do you think you’re going?”
“Home,” he said.
“I don’t think so.” She sent the others on ahead and went back for him. “I need you there. Please don’t bail on me now.”
“Why not? You’ve got an entire family to lean on to night.”
“Which is precisely why I want you there, to protect me from their overly zealous questions.”
“Don’t you think my presence during this crisis will create a few questions, as well?”
She stood on tiptoe and kissed him. “In case you missed it, they already have questions. A lot of them, if I’m not mistaken. Not to worry, though. We can handle them.”
He looked doubtful. “Think so?”
“I know so.”
“Did you see the way your father was looking at me? If I hadn’t moved aside, I think he would have taken a punch at me.”
Ashley laughed. “He looks at any male who’s ever come within a mile of any of us exactly the same way. It didn’t scare off Mike or Rick. And I promise you, Dad’s all bluster. He’s never slugged anyone as far as I know.”
“All right, then,” he said. “Anything those two can do, I can do.”
“That’s the spirit.” She met his gaze. “One last thing before we join the others. Have I mentioned how grateful I am that you were here for me today?”
“My pleasure.”
It was a rare man who didn’t mind having a woman dump all her problems and insecurities in his lap. She studied him curiously. “One of these days we’re going to have to talk about you for a change. Somehow, from the moment we met, it’s all been about me.”
He laughed. “Also my pleasure. You’re much more fascinating than I am.”
“I don’t believe that. I think there are hidden depths to Josh Madison I should be exploring.”
To her surprise, her teasing remark was met with an unexpected wariness.
“My life’s an open book,” he said, though his declaration lacked conviction.
“Then it’s past time I started reading it,” she said. “I’ve been totally self-absorbed, and you’ve graciously let me get away with it. I promise that’s going to change.” Even if it meant that her feelings for him grew even stronger and more complicated than they were now.
That flicker of wariness appeared once more in his eyes, as if he viewed her words not as a well-meant promise but as a threat.
What was it that Josh didn’t want her to find out? Up until five minutes ago, Ashley would have sworn that he truly was an open book and that she knew everything important there was to know about him. She knew he had character and strength and compassion. She’d been so sure that was everything that really mattered. Now she wasn’t certain of that at all.
It was time to fish or cut bait, Josh concluded as he sat with the D’Angelos at dinner. He let the conversation swirl around him, all of it lively and filled with the laughter he’d once imagined enviously from his own lonely house down the road. He could put Ashley off for a few more hours or possibly even a few more days as long as her folks stuck around, but he’d seen that glint of determination in her eyes. She wasn’t going to be put off indefinitely.
How was she going to react when she discovered that he, too, was a lawyer, especially one who was about to make a decision to get out of the rat race and settle into a quiet country practice? Given the way she’d reacted when he’d floated a similar plan for her own career, he suspected she wasn’t going to be impressed.
It was funny
, though, that talking to her about it had just about solidified his own resolve. Whatever happened between them, he was going to settle here. He’d rediscovered the rare contentment he hadn’t known since childhood, and he wanted it back on a permanent basis. Before he made the decision final, though, he needed to be absolutely sure that his contentment wasn’t due entirely to Ashley’s intriguing presence, that it wouldn’t vanish if she did.
There would be other differences, too. He doubted he’d be able to fish all morning long, at least not if he expected to earn a living, but he imagined he could get out on the water for an hour or so most days. And this was a great place to raise a family. He’d been thinking about that more and more as he’d envisioned a future with Ashley. Her sisters had seen it. Why couldn’t she? Maybe with the right sort of persuasion she would, but if she didn’t, he had to make certain this was the right decision for him.
He noticed a movement beside him and realized that Mike had slipped into a chair vacated by Ashley’s youngest sister.
“You look distracted, pal. Everything okay?” Mike asked. “This crowd can be a bit overwhelming the first time you meet them.”
“It’s not that. I was just thinking about some decisions of my own that need to be made.”
“Anything you want to talk about? I’m a good listener. Rick, too.”
Josh was startled to find that the prospect of confiding in a couple of male friends held a certain appeal. He’d gone through most of his life with few confidants. Most of his colleagues at the firm had been too competitive to count as friends. Stephanie had filled the role for a while, but this wasn’t a decision he could bat around with her. Before he talked to anyone, though, he had to wrestle with it on his own a little longer.
“Another time, okay?”
“Sure,” Mike said easily.
“I mean that. I could use another perspective.”
“One night next week?”
Josh nodded. “Sounds good to me.”
Mike grinned. “I’ll set it up with Rick and get back to you. Maybe we can get all the women over to his place and have a guys’ night at mine. When you’re surrounded by these strong-willed D’Angelo women, it’s nice to have backup from time to time.” He glanced over at Ashley, then turned back to Josh. “The two of you okay?”
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