I walked around her and took that stupid band off her hair, loving it as it falls down her back. She looked so beautiful and I had to touch her. I pulled out the anklet and touched her cheek. At my surprise, she leaned into it. I ran my hand down her body. I lifted her ankle and fastened the anklet as her foot rested on my knee.
A tear rolled down her beautiful face and my heart ached. She really didn't want me anymore. Okay, if this was it, I was going to make it count. I prayed I could change her mind.
I smiled and wiped her tear away with my thumb. I pulled her close to me and danced with her like I'm making love to her, praying she feels all my love and that we can get past my idiocy.
As the song ended, I had to kiss her. I dipped her and her leg wrapped around mine. I instantly became erect. I grabbed the back of her head and kissed her with all the love, want, need, passion and desire in me while praying she’d give me a clue that she's willing to take me back.
Instead, through the passion, I felt finality in her kiss; like she was kissing me for the last time, ever.
I hugged her tight and she held me tighter, around my neck. I pulled back and thumbed her tears again. I had to kiss her once again.
Again, it felt final. She pulled back and looked away.
My heart was broken again, this time in front of all my family and friends.
First and last time I ever open up to love, I vowed. Mandy, Joshua, Matthew and Nathan were dead for making me do this.
I took her hand, and escorted her to her table, cherishing the last time I’d touch her. I fought panic when we made it to her table and I had to let her go.
Rachel said something to me and I replied with a polite thank you. My mother stood next to her and I put my hand out to her then glanced at Mariah once more when she took it.
“Good night, everyone. Please enjoy the rest of your evening,” I said then walked my mother back toward the house.
“Marcus, where are we going? What aren't you with Mariah?”
“She doesn't want me, Mother. I fucked up her trust. I need you to keep me from getting piss drunk, again. I have to kill Twerp and Mandy, then I’m going to bed straight, after. I just wanted you to know where I’ll be. Enjoy the rest of the party,” I said, then gave her my keys. “Maybe a few more drinks before I retire.”
Mother gave me a sad look and sighed. “All right, darling. Not too much. I’ll come find you in a while.”
“Marcus what happened? That looked like you and she made up,” Mandy asked when Mother walked away sighing.
“She said it was done before the dance started. I'm going to bed. I've had enough. Never again tell me what I'm missing without love, all right?” I glanced at the red in the corner of my eye. “I can't do this again.” I hurriedly walk away when I saw Mariah coming our way.
July 13, 2011
I decided earlier that enough was enough and I was going to get her back, with a ring in my hand. When I saw her in Dad's office, I forced myself to remain still and not to drag her from around that desk and kiss her back to me. Instead, I held my ground while asking for my father and vowed to do that kissing thing later.
As I tried not to stare at the woman my heart, mind, body and soul ached for, the receptionist informed me where Dad was and when I saw him, I told my father of my impending proposal and asked for his mother's ring. He agreed right away to give it to me, praising my choice for a wife, as he did with Joshua.
I sprinted to Thomas' office after meeting with my father. Thomas was at his desk and watched me curiously when I appeared in his office’s doorway.
“You have a moment, Thomas?”
“Jesus... are you here for Mariah's hand, Marcus? I can't take this twice in one damn day!”
I looked like him: stunned. Nathan's proposing, huh? Hmm...
“Would you like me to come back tomorrow?”
“That is why you’re here?” He lowered his head and shook it. “Fine… have a seat. How are you going to work this out? Mariah's not even speaking to you right now.”
“I'm going to propose after Josh’s wedding on Saturday. I'm hoping to see her Friday and talk to her. I've already given her birthday gift to Lisa, in case she doesn't want to see me. I have to try, Thomas, and I'd like your blessing but if you refuse, I will ask her, anyway.”
Thomas studied at me, seemed like forever. I stared back watching his emotions play across his features. I hoped he understood I meant what I said: I will propose regardless of his answer. Finally, he exhaled and spoke in an authoritative tone.
“Never take her to live out of state, never disrespect her again and always be completely honest. Can you agree to my terms?”
“Absolutely.”
“Then you have my permission to ask. For your sake and sanity, son, I hope she accepts.”
July 15, 2011
Mariah's birthday rolled around and I'd been tempted to call her. I felt anxious every time I thought of hearing her sing again, that night. I hoped it's something sexy.
I'd been at Mother's all week, and she's had me stationed in the kitchen the entire time. I asked her to distract me from drinking and she'd done a good job, but not at the beginning of the week when I lost myself in a case of champagne left from the party. Hearing bullshit out of Adina's mouth Wednesday about how sullen and bad I looked didn't help my sobriety.
I'd wanted to call Mariah all week, especially when I was on the fourth bottle of champagne, and force her back to me. Instead, I concocted a plan to confront her after she sings. I prayed she’d respond as I washed my hands, after seeing my last patient for the day.
God, I missed her. I hoped she hadn't decided to date someone else while we’d been apart. The thought of that pissed me off more than anything.
I heard a knock behind me. I frowned; I believed there were no more patients.
“Come in,” I grunted, now thinking I shouldn’t have stayed that afternoon. “Yes, what is it,” I snapped. I grabbed a paper towel and turned. I couldn’t believe who was standing in front of me. That's not Mariah... is it? If this was a mirage, I willed it to disappear. It didn't.
“Hello, Marcus.”
I stared at her, my gaze going up and down her body. Fuck, she looked good in that pink dress. And she's wearing the anklet... Will she wear it on her wedding day? My heart wrenched at the thought. I tossed the paper towel in the trash. This cannot be good. Better fucking brace myself.
I nodded. “Hello.” My hands rested on my hips. She looked good, real fucking good. “Happy birthday,” I muttered, feeling conflicted.
She smiled. “Thank you.” My cock twitched and I wondered why and how this woman made me respond to her, just by looking at her. I moved to the table and tried to relax, waiting for the ball to drop. Why wouldn't she just get it over with?
I crossed my arms. “What brings you here, Mariah? I don't need another nurse, especially not one dressed like that.”
She inhaled then murmured, “That 'no seeing anyone else' thing we agreed to... is that still active?”
What? Was she serious with this shit? Who the hell was she trying to date? I didn’t want to know. Resolved, I decided to play this game.
“No comment.”
She looked wounded. What the hell was going on in her head? This shit was rapidly getting on my nerves. Come on, Mariah, let's get this over with; I needed to call Lisa and let her know tonight was off, at least from my end.
God, she looks so fucking good. I was going to have to move out of town; I couldn’t see her with another man. That shit would push me over the edge and I do not relish spending the rest of my life in jail for killing the fucker that gets her.
“Is that all,” I asked, all my patience in the wind. I began wishing she would just go away and save me the verbal Dear John letter. I swear, I didn’t want to hear her confirm we were forever done.
“I don't know, you tell me.”
What the hell was I supposed say to that? I just stared at her, willing her to just say it. ‘Come on, Ma
riah, let's get this over and done. Go on and make it clear for the final time you don’t want me, anymore.’
“I'm a stubborn fool.”
Huh? What the...
Mariah straightened, walked to me then kicked my feet apart. My heart went into double duty. To have her so close yet still feel so far away, tugged at me. Maybe if…
I moved back and opened my legs wider, hoping she’d move in closer. She did! I wanted to hold her; to pull her close and never let go, instead my hands gripped the edge of the table.
She leaned her forehead to mine and elation shot through me. She gripped my waist and I gasped in surprise. I gripped the table tighter, afraid to touch her. I got a kiss on each corner of my mouth and before I could stop myself, I moaned softly in want.
“Am I too late?”
She kissed my jaw. I moaned again. I couldn’t help it; having her that close was killing me.
“Too late for what?”
My voice was so low, I barely heard it. I erected as she cuddled into my neck. And I instantly got pissed off about it.
“You.”
Was she kidding me with this shit? What the fuck was going on here? I frowned, thinking she is only here because she wants sex. That had to be what this was, all this touching and kissing. My adrenaline pumped and I gripped the table even tighter. I was ready to throw her the hell out of there.
“Mariah, what exactly do you want from me? A drink or two? Dinner and a movie? Or do you want a fuck for your birthday?”
She blinked and her eyes welled. “No, I... I'm sorry I bothered you.”
She quickly turned to leave and grabbed her purse. Damn it, I offended her. She wanted... more? Her hand was already on the door knob. I felt like an ass. I needed to talk to her.
“Mariah, wait! Shit,” I yelled.
She stopped and looked down at the floor. “For what? If it's done, then it's done; you have every right in the world to move on. Let's not prolong my pain, however much I deserve it.”
Why, you little… Fuck this!
“Your pain,” I yelled at her. “What about my pain? You think this week has been easy for me? I've been aching every-fucking-day and not one word from you! And now you're standing here asking me for... what? What exactly do you want from me, Mariah?”
She finally looked up at me, her eyes watering again, and all I could think was, ‘Good going, Marcus, you completely stupid idiot!’
“I just want you, Marcus. You. I've missed you so much and I can't do another day. I wanted to see you yesterday, but... woo...”
She tried to fan her tears away then looked as if she's trying to calm. Damn it. She crossed her arms and found her favorite spot on the floor again. Yep, I was an idiot. A huge one.
“I thought our dance was it for you,” I said quietly.
“It wasn't but I thought it was for you. After yesterday, I was positive you were done.”
“Come here.”
She slowly walked to me and stopped at my feet. No, baby, not close enough.
“Closer.”
She took one small step more. She was hesitating... oh, no... that definitely would not do. You're not getting away, baby.
“Closer,” I demanded.
“No,” she said stubbornly.
I grabbed her waist and moved her get closer... Where she was not five minutes before, determined to settle this now.
And we did.
July 16, 2011
Saturday, in the vestibule, I anxiously focused on the church doors, waiting for Mariah to enter with her family. I hated dropping her off that morning but she needed to get dressed for Joshua's wedding. I even walked her to the door, as if we'd been on a date.
I felt exhausted from the events last night... the make-up sex then Mariah's birthday party... listening to her sing alone then with Jesse Harper... proposing and the all night celebratory sex with her.
I think we squeezed in about two hours of sleep before Matthew called and woke me with his digs about me and my fiancée practicing for our honeymoon. I laughed as I hung up with him. I woke Mariah and got another round in. Best damn night and morning of my life.
Waiting for her to get there, I was starting to get pissed I couldn't stay with her while she got ready, but I had to arrive early for pictures. Good thing, because memories of the previous night and that morning kept a huge grin on my face.
I stifled a yawn as my mother approached me. I smiled and kissed her cheek for the hundredth time today.
“I love this side of Marcus,” she smiled.
I grinned at her. “Is there another side of me you hate?”
“I love all the sides of you, but this one, this Marcus, is my favorite. I'd like him to come around a lot more and I think he will, now that he has Mariah back.” She grabbed my arm and led me just beyond the church’s side doors. “Don't fuck it up again,” she ordered then smiled at me. After promising I wouldn’t, my mother kissed my cheek then we went back in the church.
“Good afternoon Katherine, Marcus,” Thomas greeted as Rachel beamed at us.
“Thomas, Rachel.” I rapidly kissed Rachel’s cheek then looked behind her as I shook Thomas’ hand. Nathan and Lisa were walking in, followed by Monica, Tom and Ethan. I absently greeted them still looking to the door. I frowned when Mariah didn't follow.
“Are you looking for something, Marcus,” Rachel snickered. Mother was stifling a giggle.
“Where's Mariah,” I asked, about to panic.
I felt a tap at my shoulder. I turned and she was behind me, grinning wickedly. She looked beautiful in her birthday gift from me and that clinging dress. I wanted her again.
“That's for the 'no comment' remark yesterday,” Mariah said as she waved a finger at me.
I groaned. “Don't remind me, baby.” I kissed her and held her tight.
Matthew appeared and greeted everybody. “It's time, Marcus. If I were best man, I wouldn't need reminding.”
“Get over it, Toad.” I looked at Mariah. “Save me a dance?”
“I'll save you more than one, Boo.”
“Good.” I took another kiss then reluctantly walked off with a grinning Matthew.
* * *
As I walked Elka, Mandy's sister, down the aisle, I spotted Mariah sitting on the aisle, next to Rachel. I caressed her neck as I passed her.
“Is that the mystery girlfriend,” Elka whispered.
“She's my fiancée now,” I murmured back.
Elka nudged me. “Congratulations. When did that happen?”
“Last night.”
At the altar and I couldn't wait for this to be over. I tried to pay attention to the ceremony but I kept wondering if there was a place in the reception hall where Mariah and I could disappear… until Matthew and his incessant sex jokes, mainly about taking wagers on whether Joshua could get it up and for how long that night, drowned out my thoughts and the ceremony.
That fool actually made me turn away from the crowd to control my laughter, after I slipped him a hundred. Joshua learned from the best. I knew the entire honeymoon was going to be a rounding success.
After the wedding
“Jesus... can the two of you come up for air?”
Mariah and I broke apart and looked up Rob, who was staring at us in mock annoyance.
“What do you want, Sammy,” I muttered as Mariah wiped my mouth. I scowled. Her lips taste so good and I hated to let them go.
“I'd like a dance with your fiancée, Frank. I hear she's pretty good,” Rob said as he put his arms up and danced with himself. Mariah giggled at the sight then fixed her lipstick.
“No,” I smirked, holding Mariah’s waist so that she wouldn’t move from my lap. “Go dance with whomever kept you so occupied that you had to miss your best friend become engaged.”
“Unexpected delivery, Frank. I keep telling you babies do not arrive on a nine-to-five schedule,” Rob smirked back. “Man up and watch me dance with this beautiful woman.”
Mariah smacked my chest then smile
d at my friend. “You can ballroom dance, Rob?”
“No, not at all. I get dizzy watching others do it. I'm hoping you can step, Mariah.”
She beamed as she turned to me. “Do you really mind, boo?”
“I do, actually,” I answered, giving Rob a mock scowl. I smiled at my beautiful fiancée. “But I'll get over it. Hurry back.”
She smiled before she softly kissed me. I stood after she did.
“Behave,” I tell Rob.
He gave me a ‘whatever’ smirk. “Pay attention, Frank. You 'bout to learn something.”
I smirked back. He took Mariah's hand and led her to the dance floor. Mariah looked up at Rob and said something quietly to him. She looked around and her eyes found what she was looking for. I turned and saw she was looking at her mother. Rob nodded and smiled. He said something to the bandleader and tipped him.
When the music started, Rob and Mariah slid around the floor, dancing in a way I’d never seen before. Very fluid, precise. Well, well... that's something she's going to have to teach me. Cooking for dance lessons. The thought thrilled me to the bone.
Mariah came back to my lap and Rob went to her parents. He addressed Thomas then Rachel, who blushed and took his hand.
“My friend Madison and I dragged Mom to this class with us. She's better than me at this,” Mariah said, proudly.
She was right. Rachel danced circles around Rob and he bowed at her feet when they finished. Everyone couldn't help but to laugh and applaud.
“You did great, too, baby,” I smiled at her.
“Thank you, boo.”
I kissed her. A waltz played and I asked her to dance. We were easy with it that time, nothing showy, just holding one another as we moved. Halfway through the dance, Lisa tapped my shoulder.
“Joshua says to tell you 'Rockford,'” she murmured.
I immediately grabbed Mariah and Lisa's hands and swiftly moved to where Joshua and Mandy were standing with Nathan, Elka, my parents and Mandy's parents.
I frowned when I saw Mandy visibly fighting back tears.
“What happened?”
“The singer backed out,” Joshua replied, holding his wife.
Marcus: The M Series, Book Three Page 12
