by Conrad Jones
[EM17]##delete – repeated in the next sentence so not needed here.
[EM18]#revise – they’re? Sounds a little more natural
[EM19]#revise – they’re? Sounds a little more natural
[EM20]#revise – you’ve?
[EM21]#continuity – Peter went in saying that AJ owed him, would getting rid of the packets and Peter turning a blind eye to AJ’s deals make them even?
[EM22]#continuity – according to chapter 17 it is now forty-eight hours after the night Brian was arrested – would they have kept him in without questioning him further for all this time?
[EM23]#revise – talking?
[EM24]#revise – dashboard screen?
[EM25]#delete? repetitive
[EM26]#revise – away? Remove repetitive ‘the city’
[EM27]#revise – it’s?
[EM28]#revised – one word - no hyphen
[EM29]#revise – bodies? Or men and women?
[EM30]#clarify – how does he know that Thomas isn’t the right name at this stage? Consider deleting/revising this
[EM31]#revise – he would have had time?
[EM32]#revise – tooth?
