“Then you shouldn’t have proposed.”
“Yeah. Well. It was complicated.”
I saw the crack in his perfect life. The foundation to his hard exterior was faltering and I was here to see it crumble. His eyes grew wet. He stopped talking. “What’s going on?” I became more concerned the more his brows furrowed. He was really having a difficult time.
After a second he took a deep breath. “I don’t know. I was pressured into this sort of. Or, at least I feel pressured. I don’t know.”
“Oh. That’s not good. You two seem so happy, though. What’s the problem?” he seemed so in love and ready to marry her when he spammed my timeline with photos and posts about her all the time. It was as if nothing else went on in his life. Just the thrill and excitement of expensive vacations with one of the prettiest girls in California.
“When I asked her to marry me, I did it out of necessity.” He was still hesitant to tell me. What did that mean? Did he feel the same way when he proposed to me? Like I needed it for reassurance? I had actually loved him. When I said yes it was because I had thought about spending the rest of my life with him years before he showed me a ring. I felt sick to my stomach. I didn’t want to have to coach him through his wedding after he shattered me before mine.
“What do you mean?”
“She said that she was pregnant.” He dropped the bomb. I didn’t want to hear that. He had always been so careful. I couldn’t imagine him not using protection. Even when I was on the pill he would use it, just in case. He was never ready to be responsible for another person. That was an even bigger commitment than marriage. “I couldn’t have that happen. I loved her enough that I thought it could work, but now she isn’t pregnant anymore. I don’t know if she ever was. But I can’t go back on it, because then our parents will ask. My mom and dad were already furious at me when we….”
“Yeah.” He didn’t have to say anything. I knew. I had loved his parents like they were my own. They treated me like family. I was certain that I was going to become family. They must have felt the same way. I wondered if they liked her as much as they liked me. I wondered if they were just being nice to me. They were such sweet people, Tom could have brought in a homeless person and they would be head over heels for them.
“But you seem to be having such a great time with Grant that I wanted your advice. What keeps you two going? I know it’s probably early in your relationship, but I have to wonder. Are you two doing well?” The way he said it made me feel like he had other motives. He looked at me with hope. It made me even sicker.
I thought about his question. I wanted to help Tom, but at the same time I didn’t want him to feel like he could stomp me until I was a pulp of a person. He had already caused enough emotional damage. I didn’t need to become his relationship therapist for this one. And I didn’t want to become his rebound. I didn’t want him anymore.
“Love.” I said. I stopped picking my fingers.
“Genuine, unfaltering love. He and I may have difficult times, sure. But even when we fight, we keep what’s important in our thoughts. We just want to be happy with each other, no matter what it takes. I have never felt such a powerful amount of emotion for one person. I am in love like never before.” I could see the daggers I threw at him cut him.
“When we make decisions, we know that it is because we want to, and not because we feel like we have to. We love each other.”
I looked over to Grant. He was still chatting with my mom, making her and my father laugh. I wasn’t in love, not yet. But I could see myself falling for him. I looked back at Tom, the person I used to love. I knew all his strengths and weaknesses. I had been with him through thick and thin. When I looked at him now I didn’t feel anything. When I looked at Grant, I could feel sparks.
“I don’t know if she and I have that.”
“You better find out soon. It’s about to become legally recognized.” I did have some pity on him. It would be hard to be stuck in a relationship without love. It would be hard to be stuck in a relationship period. Without love, he would become bitter and either have to get a divorce or stay unhappily married if he waited too long.
“You guys do so many fun things, though. I wouldn’t have guessed you weren’t happy. Your Instagram streams are flooded with smiles and what seems like exotic vacations. How do you know it isn’t just cold feet?”
“I don’t know that. But there are a lot of issues, too. Those have been there for a while.”
“Well, I’m not a therapist. But if you want help, there are people out there that can help you.” The party began, and people at the front started giving speeches for the two of them. Tom listened intently. I looked for his fiancée. She was sitting at the front, looking for Tom. “You should go stand by her at least.” I said.
“I’m fine back here.” He still listened. A lot of her friends spoke, saying that they couldn’t have asked for a better guy for the bride. He would clap and laugh when appropriate, but I could see the pain in his eyes. This was one battle that I didn’t have to help him through.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Grant get up. He came over to us and said hi to Tom. Tom said hi back and went back to listening to the speeches, but he watched us out of his peripherals. Grant smiled at me.
“Hey.”
“Hi.”
He put his arm around my shoulder and pulled me in close to him. I looked into his eyes. I saw a man. More man than Tom. I saw someone who wanted to make others happy. I saw someone who did things for other people not because he had to, but because he wanted to. I saw someone that I wanted to keep seeing over and over again.
He was being very understanding about Tom. I appreciated that so much. He no longer actually needed to be here with me, but he chose to. It was nice to have someone with me to fight this battle. I was lucky that it was Grant. He noticed me staring and smiled back.
“Hey.” He said, again.
“Hi.” I repeated. I was falling for him. How could I not fall for him? He was kind, dashing, and he had already won over my parents. This was the easiest relationship I had ever been in. I wanted it to last. I wanted to rub my happiness in Tom’s face.
Grant excused us and we went back to the table. He ordered a couple drinks, sensing that me talking to Tom wasn’t what I had wanted to do. He asked me multiple times to make sure I was okay. I was. I felt better for sticking it to Tom. I felt better that his life wasn’t as perfect as it seemed. It made me feel less awful about mine. It gave me hope. Maybe everyone was going through pretty shitty times. It didn’t just have to be me.
All of the bride’s family and friends were beautiful too. They were the majority of the people who spoke that night. I recognized a few of Tom’s friends, but most of these people were strangers to me. It seemed like he had started a new life with her, and had a clean slate after me.
I grabbed Grant’s hand and then excused us again from the table. The party wasn’t over, but I was done with it. I pulled him back to the room.
22
Grant
After talking to Tom, April was more and more interested in me. I was so relieved. I was worried that he would try to win her back. I’m glad he didn’t. When we got back to the room she immediately kicked off her shoes and led me to the bed. My pulse was racing again. I was so thrown back by her abrasiveness that it gave me butterflies. I felt cheery and I also kicked off my shoes.
She pulled me in by my neck, kissing me. She tasted like cherries. She was lovely. I began to pull at my belt, but she took my hands and gently rested them on her waist. She was so soft. I wanted to shock her. I was going to. I was going to drive her wild.
I grabbed at her waist and leaned over her again. I kissed and kissed, my heart racing more and more. As it went on, I began to kiss her faster and harder. She gasped under the kisses. I moved my hands to her back and let my tongue into her mouth, twirling it over and over around hers. She sighed.
I wanted her so bad. I wanted her now. I was going to have to
make it last, though. I was going to milk every minute of this, enjoying all of her body. She was so curvy. She was hot. I pulled at my belt again, this time getting it out of my pants.
April pulled back, letting down her hair and shaking it back and forth. The bun had curled the ends of it into gentle waves. She was stunning. She looked at me through heavy lidded eyes. “You’re so sexy.” I whispered. She smiled and pulled me back in. I kissed her neck. She let her head fall to the side and took every bit of it with pleasure. She smelled like lilacs. Her hair was soft. I pushed my hands into it, feeling all of it. She sighed again.
I couldn’t handle it when she made noise. It made me harder and harder. I hadn’t been this aroused before. I wanted to have her. I wanted her bad. I stopped kissing her and went back down to her feet, lifting her dress. This time I lifted it over her head. He bra didn’t match her panties. It was adorable. I kissed her neck and started to work my way down. I kissed her breast. Unhooking her bra, I pulled it off with my teeth. I was going to use all the tricks I could to impress her.
“Very talented,” she giggled. She sighed as I resumed kissing. I sucked on her softly. Her legs wriggled beneath me and I felt her hands grip at my hair. I was becoming harder and harder as she did, letting out soft moans as I kept kissing.
She pulled me up to her face, using her hands to unbutton my shirt. I pulled off my tie, tossing it to the floor. Her hair was already a little bit crazy, and it just turned me on more.
I let the shirt slide off my arms and pulled off my under shirt quickly. Leaning to the side, I slid my hands down her waist and into her underwear. They were wet. I played with her, going in circles. My fingers danced, and she breathed heavier, hanging on my lips with hers. Her hands worked quickly, unbuttoning my pants and unzipping them. She felt me from outside of my underwear, stroking me slowly.
I bit her lip. It made her gasp. I couldn’t help myself at all. I moved to her ears and sucked softly on the lobe. She sighed again, and rubbed faster and faster.
I pushed her underwear down, in hopes she would do the same with mine. She didn’t. She stroke harder and harder. I put my fingers in her, pulsing back and forth. She rocked with me, grabbing my arm with one of her hands. She squeezed and moaned louder.
“Take my pants off.” I whispered to her. She opened her eyes and slowly lowered my pants to my bent knees. I kicked them back. “Now the boxers.” I watched her as she lifted the band and pushed them down too. My dick was hard. I rolled a condom from my pocket down on it.
She spread her legs, bending them at the knees. I pushed into her gently, thrusting slowly. She put her hands on my neck and pulled me into her, kissing me. She was tight. I took my hand and moved it down to her clit, playing with it as I humped her. She moaned louder and louder.
I couldn’t help myself. I went faster and faster. I loved the way she sounded. It was so hot. I caught myself sighing, too. She pulled me in hard, and I started kissing her harder. She rolled over and sat on top of me.
She pushed with so much force. I didn’t expect that. When she bounced, her boobs bounced with her. I put my hands on them, gently playing with her nipples. She kept sighing and kept bouncing, growing louder and louder.
She kept beating on me, harder and harder until she started moaning very loudly. The headboard beat against the wall. I could feel myself bubbling up. I put my hands on her thighs and pushed from the bottom.
I bit my lip. My pulse was high. I felt her hot and wet on me. She rocked back and forth, spinning around and around on top of me.
I pushed her back over and went back on top. Holding her legs up, I humped faster than I had before. I went deep, all the way in. Until I came. It sent chills down my spine. She grabbed at my back, leaving marks where her fingers had been. I humped a few more times until I pulled out.
I had never experienced sex that was that great, or at least, not for a very very very long time. She panted on the bed, exhausted and sweating. She was so adorable.
“That was something.” She breathed, pushing her hair behind her ears.
I couldn’t speak. I was overwhelmed. I just kissed her on the mouth. It sent more chills down my back. I hadn’t felt this way in a long time. I didn’t know what love felt like, but this was the closest I had gotten.
She pulled back and smiled at me. After kissing my sweaty forehead she went to the bathroom and put her pajamas on. Even though the TV played shows, I was distracted. I thought of her. I wondered what we would do after this weekend. I wanted to see her frequently. I wanted to see her forever.
She fell asleep quickly so I turned the TV off. Tucking her in, I kissed her forehead. Even though I had been upset earlier, I was happy to have met her. I felt like I should have been the one paying this time. It was a magical weekend.
I had a hard time going to sleep. Thoughts of earlier kept racing though my head and gave me more butterflies than before. Remembering the moments would make me hard enough alone. I wanted her again, but couldn’t stand to wake her up. I went to bed after a while. She looked so peaceful next to me.
23
April
I didn’t realize my phone was ringing at first. I thought it was a melody that was part of my dream. My sleep-crusted eyes shot open as soon as I figured out that I wasn’t prancing in a meadow. I must have forgotten to turn off an alarm, or maybe I accidentally set one. Grant stirred. For a second I thought I had woke him up. He turned over and continued to breathe his long and heavy sleep breaths. My screen was like sunlight through a magnifying glass to my eyes. Squinting through my eyelids, I saw I had one missed call. It was from Tom.
I let out a heavy, heaping sigh. There must have been some rule of etiquette he was breaking about the amount of times he had talked to his ex-fiancée at his current engagement party.
I snuck out of the room, slowly and as quietly as I could. I didn’t want to wake Grant. I didn’t want him to think that I was weak for encouraging Tom. I wasn’t encouraging him. I didn’t want him to call me. It was exhausting to be here and not away from the terror of his presence. I thought I had missed him. Now I miss the days where I could go hours without thinking about him once. Or at least, without seeing him once.
Almost as soon as I let the door lightly click shut my phone began to ring again. It was Tom again, right on queue. I slid my finger over the screen and answered.
“Hello?”
“April?”
“It’s six in the morning.”
“Hi. I know. Sorry. Good morning.”
“Hi?” I knew there had to be more to this than a wakeup call. There always was something that made what could have been simple infinitely more complex. “It’s six in the morning?” I said it like a question. I was unable to phrase all of my real questions. If I hadn’t woken up only moments ago, maybe I would have been smart enough to just turn my phone on silent.
“I know. I said sorry.” There was his snark.
“Couldn’t you have texted? Or waited to call when humans are awake?”
“I need to see you. Now.” He said it like a command. “This can’t wait any longer.”
“Is someone in trouble or something?”
“…No.”
“Is there an emergency?”
“Yes.” I could tell he was lying.
“Is there an emergency that requires my immediate attention?”
“I need to see you now.” He said again. “Come down to the lobby.”
My only course of action was to follow. I sighed heavily. It seemed to be the only thing I was in control of anymore. I could only express myself through insignificant signs of annoyance. “Fine.” I pushed the door open slightly, hoping even more now not to wake Grant. I kicked flip flops on and then exited the room as quietly as I could.
The elevator ride was long. My brain was now processing at a speed where I could frantically worry about everything. My stomach turned in knots. I made a mental list of all the things in the world I didn’t want to do right now.
10
. Get lost in the sewers of LA
9. Pluck out each of my leg hairs individually
8. Be water boarded
7. Get burned at the stake for being a witch
6. Fight my way out of a rainforest
5. Get stranded on a desert island, inhabited by cannibals
4. Retake my final exams
3. Live in a world of flesh eating zombies
2. Go to Tom’s Engagement party
1. Talk to Tom
I looked at the red button on the elevator. I could force it down and get locked in here. I wouldn’t have to think of any of this for at least one hour. I could turn the inside of the elevator into a tiny house and show it off to HGTV. I could be the woman who famously made an elevator into an adorable abode.
The numbers on the elevator counted down. I did nothing but stare at them as they initiated my inevitable doom. The lobby floor dinged. The doors parted, opening on an almost empty lobby, the only inhabitants being hotel staff doing their morning chores and Tom, sitting at a table where you had a direct view of the elevators. I had no choice but to sit by him now. He saw me.
With each step I considered a new escape plan. “I have a call from the president. I need to take it.” No, it needed to be more realistic.
“My dad is having a heart attack and my mom is having a stroke.” Too realistic and too morbid.
“I have explosive diarrhea.” That one was good. That was realistic. People experienced that. I can pretend that.
Several tiny steps and deep breaths later and I was at his table, staring in the eyes of the beast. He smiled up at me, his fangs gleaming, ready to snap the neck of his prey, me. I stood, frozen.
“Hi April.” I said nothing I stood, staring at him. If I made myself look larger than him, maybe that would scare him away. I could puff up my chest and growl.
Auctioned to Him 7: The Contract Page 88