Maybe she could talk to Maryanne, but knowing her friend she’d get all carried away and be planning the wedding by lunchtime. She’d have to see how desperate she got first. Maybe she could just figure it out on her own.
Never in a million years did Harly ever think she’d be in this position.
“Honey?” Her father called. “Your mother is eating all the cake! You better get in here if you want any!”
“Hal, really,” her mother complained.
Sighing, Harly went back into the house.
Mrs Bentley eyed her as she walked into the kitchen. “So, the Lawson boy.”
“Yep.” Harly rinsed the coffee mugs out and placed them on the draining board.
“Army boys don’t stay long.”
“They’ve got a job to do.” Mr Bentley completely missed the undercurrents in the kitchen.
“Why didn’t Paul and Becky come and check on you?” Mrs Bentley ignored him.
“I don’t know, Mum, why don’t you ask them?”
“Seems odd that he’d come here.”
“I heard that you had a drink with Alex in the pub the other night.” Mr Bentley winked. “Anything you want to tell us?”
“No.” Catching her mother’s narrowing eyes, Harly added, “We were just catching up on old times, that’s all.” And not the kind of things her parents would want to remember. Just the thought made Harly’s shoulders straighten and she looked from her mother to her father. “And if it was more, do either of you have a problem with it?”
Her parents looked at each other.
“What?” Harly demanded a little irritably.
“Well, he’s an army boy, chicken,” Mr Bentley replied. “They’re away a long time. You sure this is something you want to go further?”
“Especially with Alex?” Mrs Bentley added.
“Why especially with Alex?” Harly watched her mother closely. Could she have guessed? Was it possible?
Mrs Bentley looked away suddenly. “He has a reputation for the girls.”
“He’s not a seventeen year old kid anymore, Mum.” Even though I said almost the same thing to him.
“True, but what do you really know about him?”
“For goodness sakes!” Harly threw up her hands. “He’s only just come back, we caught up on old times, had a drink, what’s the big deal? Geez!”
“You’re right, chicken.” Mr Bentley turned to his wife. “They’re old friends, honey. Let’s not make something about something that’s not there.”
“Thanks, Dad.” Harly blew out a breath of relief.
Mrs Bentley looked dubious, but she nodded and stood up. “Okay, Harly, you know what you’re doing. We better go; I have the gardening club this afternoon and want to ensure that my orchids are packed carefully to go.” Crossing to Harly, she gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and whispered, “Just be careful, Harly. Promise me.”
“I’ll be fine.” Harly gave her father a hug and saw them both to the front door. “Thanks for the goodies, too.”
“Our pleasure.” Mr Bentley pulled on his shoes and held his wife’s arm as she stepped daintily into hers.
“Don’t worry about closing the gate behind you,” Harly said. “I have to go to the shops soon.”
She waved them off before going inside, breathing a sigh of relief as the silent peacefulness of her home surrounded her. Outside the birds sang and from the lounge came the chime of the bell in the ball with which Sunny was playing.
Moving into the kitchen, Harly switched on the radio and collected the dishes. Yes, this was what she needed. Peace and quiet, solitude, to think things through and make decisions.
Decisions about Alex, about herself, about where they stood.
Problem was, she had no bloody idea, so after twenty minutes of staring out the kitchen window, she shook her thoughts away, checked her pantry and made a list of groceries and other items she needed to pick up, and after securing the house, she got into her car and headed into town.
Mundane chores, that’s just what she needed to clear her head.
On the way into town, she passed the house that Paul was helping to build, but of him and Alex there was no sign. Something did a jitter-bug low in her belly, and fell just as fast upon not seeing Alex. Go figure.
First stop was the post office to buy more post packs to send the clothes she made to the women who had ordered them. While standing in line waiting to pay, she listened idly to the gossip around her.
More than once Alex was mentioned, or as he was more commonly known, ‘the Lawson boy’. A new face in town was always a welcome diversion. One man ahead of her was discussing the new house that Paul was building new cupboards into, and two children squabbled over which comics to buy until their mother decided for them both by putting all the comics back in the rack and taking them, bawling, outside.
Daily life. Harly smiled. It was always interesting to listen and watch other people.
The small supermarket was her next stop and she had her shopping trolley half full when she rounded a corner, nearly running full tilt into Becky.
“Hi,” Becky greeted with a gleam in her eyes.
Harly groaned inwardly. “Hey, Becky.”
“So.” Leaning on the handle of her shopping trolley, Becky smiled widely. “Rough night last night, huh?”
“The rain was pretty heavy,” Harly agreed.
“Yep. Too heavy for Alex to come home.”
“Absolutely.”
“So.” Becky waited, her gaze avid.
No way was she telling Becky anything. Harly raised one brow inquiringly. “So?”
“Alex slept in your spare bedroom, did he?”
“Yes.”
“Did he sleep well?”
“I guess so. He didn’t complain.” Far from it, in fact.
“Really.” Becky’s gaze slid over Harly’s face speculatively.
“It was a pleasant enough evening.” Harly shrugged. “We had stew for tea, watched TV, talked about old times, and went to our separate rooms to sleep.”
“Huh.” Becky didn’t look convinced.
“Was there anything else?” Harly asked. “I really need to get going, I have a heap of chores to do before I go back to the café tomorrow.”
“Nope.” Becky smiled. “I’ll see you later, then?”
“Sure.” Harly sighed with relief when Becky moved out of sight.
Next stop was the bank and then the newsagent. Finally finished with everything, she headed on home. Paul’s work ute and other assorted workers’ cars were at the building site, but there was till no sign of Alex. He was obviously inside with Paul.
Unpacking the shopping was another mundane task which required little thought. Sunny, Pepper and Chuckie amused themselves by investigating the contents of the bags, while Buffy sat and waited patiently for the meaty bone that Harly always bought her.
Once everything was packed away, she started to tidy the house which didn’t take long, not when it was just her and the furries living in it. But as she walked down the corridor to start the washing machine, her gaze fell on the open doorway to the spare bedroom and she stopped and looked at the bed.
The bed in which she’d made love with Alex, and then gone to sleep in his arms.
Jesus, she’d made love to Alex.
He’d then stated that he’d found her again and didn’t intend to let her go.
Her hands fisted in the winter top she’d been taking to the laundry as her thoughts started to tumble around in her head.
The most alarming was that he might think he wanted her, might believe it, but maybe his declaration would change in the cold light of day. Intimacy and the sharing of sadness made people look fondly on others during those times. His belief might very well change by the end of the day, the next day, or the end of the week or fortnight.
And where would that leave her? Yeah, she could just imagine him driving off into the sunset, shuddering with relief that he’d escaped the clutches of the backwoods town and Harly Ben
tley. She’d never hear from him again. That hurt a little more than it should have done.
Or maybe she was just letting her own insecurities take hold.
Slowly she walked into the laundry and opened the machine to drop the top inside to land on the other clothes awaiting washing. Alex didn’t really seem like the kind of bloke to make declarations and then regret them later, but honestly, what did she really know of him? Her last contact with him had been sixteen years ago, that was a long time. They hadn’t even been close then, not in the everyday friendly terms, anyway.
Adding a small amount of liquid detergent to the clothes, she bit her lip. And what about herself? How did she feel about Alex? Really feel? Closing the lid, she turned the electricity on at the wall, chose the water level and turned the machine on. Listening to it fill, she thought about it.
Truth be told, she had no idea. Her thoughts were a bit cloudy on the whole issue, made murky by combined desire, the memory of his masterfulness, yet gentleness, too, in the bed, and the way he’d cuddled her later.
To say he’d swept her away was putting it mildly.
Her cheeks flushed and warmth swept through her body, even as her hands shook a little while putting the detergent bottle back into the cupboard.
She’d never had sex with anyone else apart from Alex. There’d never been any man who’d made her heart flutter even a little, her belly squirm a tiny bit, her blood get a weak spark. But one kiss from Alex, one caress, one whispered word and her blood was sparking like embers of a fire gone wild, her heart stuttered, and earthy, downright lusty, feelings roiled low in her belly.
Just remembering how he’d felt as he’d loomed over her made her palms damp. Just the thought of having him inside her body, hot and hard and powerful, had a pulse beating deep inside a very low, low place in her body.
“Cripes!” Blowing out a breath, she went into the bathroom and washed her heated face. If she kept thinking hot thoughts about Alex, she’d end up needing a cold shower, late autumn or not.
Patting her face dry, she looked into the mirror and frowned. What did he see in her that attracted him, if he were being truthful? Sure, she liked her eyes, and her smile had always been described by friends as, well, friendly. But compared to the women he had to meet both while helping his family with their business, and on his travels in the Army, she must pale.
“And maybe,” she whispered at her reflection, “You don’t think you’re as worthy as you believed.”
That was sobering. Over the years she’d thought that she’d matured, had her own life, knew her own worth, and yet here she was, doubting that Alex could really be attracted to her.
Because she didn’t really know him, and as it turned out, she obviously didn’t really know herself, either, and that was just as bad.
Maybe having dinner with him wasn’t a good idea after all.
Why not? Think you’re not worth it?
No, I’m worth it, damn it! But I don’t know him.
So this is a perfect way to get to know him.
He’ll think it’s a date.
So? Isn’t it?
No. Yes. Maybe.
Get a grip on yourself, girl! It’s just dinner.
What if he intends to have sex after it?
I want sex.
No I don’t! How can I want sex with a man I’ve only just met again?
Because I’m attracted to him. Alex Lawson is…hot.
So how can he possibly be attracted to me?
How could he not? Why not? I’m a good person.
But I’m not beautiful, I’m not slim, I’m not who men are attracted to.
I should slap myself. I have plenty to offer a man.
Yeah. Four furry babies and a good sewing hand.
I make a mean cappuccino, too.
The absurdity at the last part of her internal argument had her laugh out loud suddenly as she walked into the kitchen. “God, Harly, you’re pathetic! The first decent date you’ve ever had in your life and you start to poke holes in it. Cripes, so what if I choose not to have sex with Alex? If he really respects me, he’ll not push it.” Hey, maybe that’s a good test. No sooner had the mean little thought crossed her mind than she scowled. Looking at her reflection in the toaster as she lifted it up, she scolded, “You are not mean-spirited. You’ll go and you’ll enjoy yourself and you’ll get to know Alex better.” Shaking the crumbs from the toaster into the sink, she nodded decisively as she returned it to the cupboard. Yes, she’d go to this dinner with the objective in mind of getting to know Alex better and enjoying herself.
There was no denying she was attracted to him. Sure, he’d come down here spitting fire, but when everything had been explained and burned down, there was the glimpse of the Lawson boy she remembered. Good natured, friendly, charming with his old-fashioned courtesies. Now she just had to find out if those qualities still existed in reality. And if he was really attracted to her enough to make truth of the declaration he’d made.
One of those outstanding qualities was pretty plain. He could have just ignored the fact that a woman he’d had sex with once in his teenage years had, unknown to him, been pregnant and lost the baby. He had no ties to her. But no, he’d come seeking answers. Yes, his questions had been tinged with undealt sadness for his friend, but he’d come, and she knew that even if Mark had lived, Alex would still have come to see her looking for answers. Instinctively she knew that if the baby had lived, he’d have demanded his share of time with it, taken on his duties, and started to provide for them. His baby. Their baby. His child who would have now been sixteen years of age. He’d have insisted on being a part of their lives, because that was just the kind of man he was.
Because Alex Lawson knew what he wanted, in what he believed, and that was family and loyalty.
Harly nodded silently. It was she who didn’t know, and the fact was that she would try to figure out where she stood on the whole subject of her and Alex Lawson. Never mind the fact that just having their two names in the same sentence was mind-boggling, it also sounded so unbelievably good.
What do you know? The giddy teenager who’d had a crush on the teenage Lawson boy was still deep inside her mature body. Harly shook her head and smiled a little. Guess some things never really change. Yeah, it was the truth, hard as it was to face. She, Harly Bentley, was having a little crush on the grown up Lawson boy.
Instead of being embarrassed about it, she laughed, felt a lot better, and went out to check the damage the storm had wreaked on pot plants and roses. Now she’d decided on a course of action it was time to leave that for tonight and concentrate on the hundred other things that called for her attention.
One of those things involved a visit to her doctor to go on the pill. She’d learned that lesson a long time ago. This time she’d be prepared. Alex might have condoms in his wallet, but she wasn’t taking any chances.
Seven
Helping Paul carry the bench top through the hallway of the house-in-progress, Alex listened to his friend with an inward smile.
“Women,” Paul growled, disgruntled. “I’m telling you, mate, a bloke can’t figure ‘em out.”
“You don’t say.”
“You know what happened this morning?”
“I’m sure I’m about to find out.”
They moved around Zac, the plumber, and set the bench down on the kitchen counter, moving it into place and shifting it here and there until Paul was satisfied.
“Yesterday Becky mentioned that she was craving marshmallows. Well, I forgot to get some, didn’t I?”
“Apparently.”
“So I get up at the arse-crack of dawn, go to the twenty-four hour servo and buy her two bags of marshmallows. Two.”
“Uh-huh.” Alex joined Zac, who was leaning against the wall and listening with a big grin.
“I take ‘em back to my beloved.” Paul disappeared behind the bench as he crouched down to check something before bouncing back up into view again with a scowl on his face. �
��And what do you think she said?”
“Thank you?”
“No! She said - get this, this is gonna kill you - she said ‘Marshmallows? But I fancy jelly beans now.’ Jelly beans!” Paul slapped his forehead. “Of course, how stupid could I be? I should have known that, right? Because I’m a bloody mind-reader, right? Right?”
Alex exchanged looks with Zac. “He’s a mind-reader.”
“I reckon so.”
“So you know what I did then?” Paul demanded.
“Dug your hole a little deeper?” Zac offered.
“I went back to the servo and got her two bags of jelly beans and drove all the way back home, and when I gave them to her - listen, you just have to hear this-”
“Don’t think we have a choice,” Alex commented, hugely entertained.
“She says to me, she says ‘jelly beans? Do you want me to get fat?’” Paul flung up his hands. “So then I said-”
“Oh shit.” Zac’s eyebrows rose in disbelief. “You were actually stupid enough to answer?”
Ignoring him, Paul stabbed one finger down on the bench top. “I said ‘Honey, you’re going to get a little fat but it’s okay, I’ll still love you.’”
Alex’s lips started to tremble. Really, he was trying to maintain a serious expression, but just imagining how it had all gone down between Becky and his clueless friend was just killing him.
“Shit a brick.” Zac was awed. “You didn’t.”
“I told her, I said “Honey, have a jelly bean.’ And she stared at me, you know? Her eyes sort of glowing, a funny kind of glow.”
“Sort of possessed-like?” Zac guffawed.
Jesus, Alex was having a hard time controlling himself.
Totally oblivious to his friends’ reactions, Paul continued his rant. “I said ‘Honey, sweetie, it’s not like you’re not going to get a little cuddlier anyway, right? So have a jelly bean, Becky. Enjoy the sugar rush.”
Alex started laughing.
Zac was guffawing so hard tears were in his eyes.
“And then she starts yelling at me!” Confounded, Paul shook his head. “I mean, what the hell did I say wrong? Here I am, trying to be a good, supportive husband-”
The Lawson Boys: Alex Page 15
