I sat up quickly, and threw back the covers. I was trying my best not to overreact or worry. She had probably gone to the vending machine, unless maybe she needed some fresh air. I hit the switch on the lamp by the television, and looked around. Her stuff was still neatly tucked next to mine, even her shoes. She couldn’t have gone far.
When I opened the door of our room, I peeked out. The hallways were clear, not a soul in sight. I could feel my anxiety growing.
Maybe Fox came and took her away. Maybe she was ready to go, and she called them to pick her up. But then why would her shoes and bag still be in the room. Nothing made sense. Last night was incredible. It was everything I’d hoped it would be, and more. I couldn’t wrap my head around the idea of her leaving after what we’d shared.
My phone was in my bag, but I fished it out to try and call her. When I powered my phone on, I didn’t bother checking the missed calls, because I knew they’d all be from Obi and Fox. Now was not the time, to worrying with that. There sister was missing, and on my watch.
Okay, maybe she wasn’t missing, but I couldn’t help the unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach.
It rang, but she never picked up. I tried the number again, and still nothing. It wasn’t ringing inside the room, but she could’ve had it turned off.
“Shit!”
I scrambled around the room and threw some clothes and shoes on, heading straight for the door. My hands hit the buttons on the elevator like they were Fox’s face. It was like my brain was running a marathon, but time just stood still. I couldn’t get things to work fast enough. Inside the elevator, I tried to dial her number again, but I couldn’t get service inside the moving box
When the elevator doors opened, I rushed over to the reception desk. An older man stood behind the counter. It wasn’t the same girl that was there when we checked in. It wasn’t even a girl. An older man stood behind the counter.
“Excuse me, Sir.” I gathered his attention. “Did you happen to see a young girl come through here? She has long blonde hair, and she stands about this tall,” I held my hand up to my chest to show him where.
“Does she wear glasses?” He asked.
“No,” I replied quickly, rubbing my head. “Wait, yes.” I proceeded. “Sometimes she does wear glasses. They are kind of big for her face, with black frames.”
He smiled. “I think I saw her then. She walked out the front there,” he pointed straight ahead. “And she took a right.”
“Was anyone with her?”
“No,” he shook his head. “She was by herself.”
My slapped my palm on the desk. “Thank you, Sir.” I jogged off towards the door.
When I got outside, I looked towards the right but the street was empty aside from a few people sitting with their backs to the hotel. It was too dangerous for her to be out at night by herself. Fox must’ve picked her up. It was the only logical explanation. She wouldn’t be out roaming the city streets alone. She wouldn’t.
I rushed to the corner trying to see if I could see down the surrounding streets. I was about to give up and call Fox, submit to the fullest, but I was afraid. What if she wasn’t with him, and something had just happened to her? I’d never forgive myself.
My eyes shot through each street, covering every inch as quickly as I could. Trying my best to make sure I didn’t miss her. My throat felt like it was closing in, and I was blinking back a burning sensation from my eyes. Full on panic mode was setting in. I was about to lose my shit.
Standing at the corner, I heard some commotion coming from my right. Crowds of people were gathered outside of what looked like an all-night pharmacy or supermarket. My heart rate picked up. It was pounding so hard in my chest, that I could feel it in my throat. I looked both ways and then darted across the street in that direction. Something was calling me there, pulling me in that direction. The moment I made it through the crowd, I knew why.
“Gwen!” I yelled.
She was pacing back and forth, with her head buried into her chest. She was still wearing the tiny shorts she went to bed in; only her legs were both covered in blood from her knees down.
People from the crowd were shouting, but my brain couldn’t process it all. There was broken glass scattered all around, and someone yelled for me to get her out of there.
I stepped up to her, and touched her shoulder. “Gwen,” I said softly into her ear.
She lifted her head up slowly, and my heart dropped to my feet.
FUCK!
I gasped. I couldn’t breathe.
“Someone call an ambulance!” I screamed.
“They won’t stop touching me. I just need to get something to drink.” She explained. She looked at me, but it felt more like she was looking through me. Tears stained her cheeks, and she held a piece of glass in her hands. She was rocking back and forth, and saying things that made no sense.
“Gwen, listen to me. You’re going to be okay. An ambulance is coming. Let me have the glass.” I reached my hand towards hers in an attempt to take it from her.
She shook her head back and forth. “I feel sick.”
“I know,” I nodded. A single tear slid down my cheek.
“Where’s Fox?” She asked. Then she looked back up at me.
I stepped closer to her, but she backed up. “Don’t touch me!” She yelled out.
I held up my hands. “I won’t. Everything is going to be okay.”
Only I wasn’t so sure about that. The sound of sirens grew closer. Something was wrong. She was having some kind of breakdown or something. I’d never seen anything like it before, but when I saw her blank eyes, I knew something was seriously wrong.
A police officer showed up around the same time as the ambulance. “Back up!” He yelled to the crowd, before trying to approach us. “Ma’am, are you alright? What’s going on?” He asked her.
She looked up at him with that same scared, lost look. Her body continued to rock, and under her breath she kept repeating the words ‘make them stop touching me.’ She kept saying it, like her brain was on repeat.
The officer looked at me. “I’ve seen this before,” he said.
Well, I hadn’t. “She’s with me,” I explained. “We are staying at the hotel. I woke up, and she was gone.”
The EMS worker somehow managed to coerce her into the ambulance. I didn’t know what they said to her, but I was thankful.
“Does she have some parents or guardians that can be called?” The officer asked me.
I nodded, and placed a hand over my mouth.
She had to be okay. More tears fell from my eyes. It scared me have to death to see her like that. I still wasn’t sure what the hell was even going on. Was she okay? Had this happened before?
I had to call her brothers.
“Where are you taking her?” I asked the driver of the ambulance. He explained as quickly as possible how to get to the nearest hospital, and I needed to get there fast.
The officer stopped me before I could jet off to the hotel parking garage. “I have a few more questions for you, and we will need someone to take care of the damages caused here.” He explained.
“I can take care of everything. I just need to be wherever she is. Can you ask the rest of these questions at the hospital?” I pleaded.
“Give me your name, address, and telephone number now, and I’ll be at the hospital to finish up before my shift ends.”
I obliged, leaving him with all the information he needed. Then I rushed back to the hotel to get in my car.
Once inside, I dialed Fox’s number.
“I’m going to fucking kill you,” he said when he picked up. He started to scream at me from the other end of the line. I deserved it, but it wasn’t the time.
“FOX!” I yelled. “Shut up for two seconds.” I interrupted. “Get in your car and get to Little Rock East Memorial hospital, and hurry up.”
“What happened?”
“If I could explain it right now, I would. But I have no idea. Get here now!”
I hung up the phone, not waiting for him to reply. He was going to kill me, that was inevitable. But Gwen needed him now, and I didn’t want to spend my time hashing it out over the phone. He could murder me later.
It took me about twenty minutes to find to the hospital, and another ten minutes to get parked. I slammed my car door shut, and ran in through the emergency room entrance.
“Excuse me,” I said, getting the attention of the lady behind the plate glass window. I was so out of breath that I could barely speak. “Gwen Taylor was just brought in. I need to see her.”
“Are you immediate family?”
My eyes grew wide.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I spoke under my breath. “No. We were here together on a vacation.” I explained.
“I’m sorry, Sir. Immediate family only in the emergency room, unless specifically requested by the patient.
And the night kept getting better and better.
“She’s alone,” I snapped.
“I’m sorry. It’s hospital policy.”
What was I supposed to do?
I backed away from the entryway, and walked back outside. So many emotions were running through my mind, that I felt like I couldn’t get a grip on reality.
“Please let her be okay,” I whispered. “Please.”
24
Gwen
“Do you know your name?”
“Do you know where you are?”
“How old are you?”
“Can you tell me what day it is?”
“Fox,” I said, looking all around the room. The pungent smell of bleach burned my nose when I took a deep breath. These people needed to get out of my face. “Fox,” I said again.
I felt the stick of a needle in my arm, but when I tried to jerk away, I couldn’t. Something was holding me down.
It was scaring me. There was a ringing in my ears, and I couldn’t move my hands or my legs. “No!” I screamed and thrashed around. “Let me go.”
Those last words sounded hollow, as my eyelids grew heavy.
“Mom,” I whispered, but that was all I could remember.
25
Josh
My fist connected with the brick siding of the building, and I felt my knuckles crunch at the weight of my punch. It was the first solid feeling I’d felt in the past two hours, I had no clue what was happening. My Mom was on her way, which surprised the crap out of me, but I needed someone there who could understand. She hadn’t been an active nurse since I was born, but she knew the ins and outs of the medical field.
And well, I just needed her there.
I rested my head against the side of the building, feeling completely useless.
At any moment her brothers would be there. It should’ve brought me comfort in knowing that I could find out what was going on, but I was terrified because they’d likely leave me in the dark where I belonged.
When I closed my eyes all I could see was her face, that look of pure chaos in her eyes. She was lost. Her mind wasn’t there. It was choking me up inside.
“You,” I heard that familiar voice that I was dreading.
When I saw his face, my legs grew weak. I had been trying to prepare myself for the moment he showed up, but it was useless. The fight or flight mode kicked in. I swallowed down the hard mass that felt lodged in my throat.
I thought I was going to start swinging my fists, maybe even scream at him, but neither of those things happened. It was like a sudden feeling of relief invaded my body, and I cried.
I cried like a God damned baby, right there in front of her brothers. I’d never been more relieved in my entire life.
“Go to her,” I said through my sobs.
My back slid down the wall, and I gripped my knees.
It would’ve been the best time for Fox to let me have it. He could’ve kicked me while I was down, and I would’ve taken the beating. Gladly. But, he didn’t. I looked up at him, and wiped my face with the back of my hand. There was no anger on his face. There was no hate in his eyes. He wasn’t smug-like, not even a hint of satisfaction shown on his face. He looked hurt. He looked as bad as I felt.
“Don’t go anywhere,” he told me.
I agreed, willingly.
The two of them hurried inside the building, and I sat there awaiting my fate.
When my Mom arrived, the two of us sat together at the picnic table. I told her everything that happened, and reliving those moments nearly killed me all over again. It was like being stabbed in the same place over and over again. The knife would come out, and be stuck right back in at the same angle and same spot. The wound would never heal.
Fox and Obi were inside for a long time. It felt like an eternity. The moment they finally walked back out the doors, I had already anticipated the worst. You know when you think your body can’t take anymore it proves you wrong.
They spotted me by the table, and hurried in our direction.
“Fox, Obi, this is my Mom, Beth,” I introduced them before Fox could start swinging. I didn’t want him to cause a scene in front of her, and I wasn’t quite sure where his head was. He’d been known to flip out with only a moment’s notice.
Both of them were nice and said hello. “I’m going to go grab some coffee,” she said as she stood up from the table. “Would you boys like me to bring you a cup?”
“I’ll go with you,” Obi chimed in. I wasn’t expecting that, but I guess Fox had some things to get off his chest. I was just thankful we were right outside the ER.
Just as soon as my Mom and Obi were behind the glass, Fox spoke.
“I have some things to say to you, and you’re going to listen.”
“Wait,” I held my hand up. He was growing angrier by the second. I didn’t want to interrupt, but I had to know. “Could you tell me if she’s okay first? Please.”
“She on a forty-eight-hour psychiatric hold, but she’s okay.”
Psychiatric hold? I didn’t know what that meant, but it didn’t sound good. At least she was okay though.
“Obi and I had a long drive up here, and we talked through a lot of shit. He convinced me to tell you what was going on. Said that you needed to know, because not only do you love her, but she’s in love with you.” He took a seat on the opposite side of the table and continued. I just sat there still as a statue, hanging on to his every word. “Gwen is on medication that treats her for PTSD and Psychosis. Without it she has manic episodes like this.”
I swallowed roughly trying to figure out if I heard him correctly. “She seems fine.” I said. PTSD happens when a person witnesses or has a traumatic event happen. My head was spinning in circles. What could’ve possibly happened to make her that way.
“Most of the time, she is. But one day without her medication, or one night,” he rolled his eyes, “and it spirals out of control.”
My palms grew sweaty. “Where are your parents, Fox? Shouldn’t they be around more, if she’s sick?”
“They’re the reason that she’s sick.” The color of his face faded to a pale white shade. “That night of the party, when she was attacked. You know the one she confessed about the other day?”
I nodded.
He continued. “Gwen’s best friend Abbi called my parents the night of that party when she realized that Gwen was completely trashed. We didn’t know until later that she’d actually been drugged that night. The guy who had locked her in the room that night had slipped a sleeping pill into her drink, and she was out of it. My parents barged into that house and found my sister locked in a room with that guy. My Dad flipped out,” he shook his head as if he remembered the details vividly. “My Dad beat the hell out of that kid, before they pulled my sister out of that house. Cops were called. It was a big mess. But when they were headed home that night, a semi crossed over the yellow line and hit their car head on.”
“No,” I said the word, but hadn’t realized I said it out loud.
“Yeah.” He nodded his head. “It killed my parents instantly.”
“Gwen was in the hospital for a long time. She broke her collarbone and a couple of ribs, and suffered a severe concussion. She wasn’t even out of the hospital for my parent’s funeral. When she finally became alert, she asked for Mom and Dad. The doctors ran several tests on her and didn’t find anything. But, according to her behavior, the doctor’s diagnosed her with PTSD. They said that after a trauma like that, sometimes your brain will block out the memory. That’s what she did. She blocked out the memory of what happened that night. Anytime her brain starts to put together pieces, she shuts down. If she were to have a dream about that night, she’d wake up panicked. All the memories that she has from the night of the incident are locked away. It’s like she has a file cabinet in her brain that is locked, and no one is allowed in. Not even her. She refuses to open it up; letting those memories remain locked away forever.”
“Will she ever fully remember?” I asked.
He shrugged. “The doctors don’t know. After weeks of nightmares, she had a psychosis break at home, and that’s when the doctor put her on some medication. They said it would help keep her brain more organized, and help to make her feel less anxious. Without it, she’s a complete mess.”
She didn’t have it here. She didn’t pack her medicine for the trip. I’m a complete fool. How could I let it happen?
“Over the past year, she seems to have gotten worse. She’s had more episodes. Obi and I were afraid that the medicine wasn’t working anymore. We’ve done our best to look out for her, but we just keep failing. I’m fucking twenty years old Man; I never expected to be her legal guardian. I can barely keep myself straight, much less her. I’m failing miserably.”
“No,” I responded quickly. “You can’t place all the blame on yourself when you’ve been carrying around these kinds of burdens. It’s not your fault.”
“She’s under my care. It is my fault.”
“Can she recover from this?” I asked him. I wanted to know what we were up against.
Are you with me? Page 11
