by A. K. Koonce
Unless Minue miraculously shows up a day early.
We can only hope.
The moment I reach the fourth floor landing, a mixture of relief and buzzing adrenaline is rising in my chest. I’m just a few yards away from my bedroom door. I’m almost home free.
There’s a wide smile pressing to my lips at the simple feel of achievement. No one saw me with my just-fucked hair and my dragon friend’s wrinkled clothes.
Not that I have anything to hide anyway.
I’m innocent. This is the face of innocence.
Another manic smile stretches across my lips as my palm grips the cool knob of my bedroom door.
His big hand wraps around my wrist and he spins me to face him in one swift move. In two stalking steps Kain pins me against the door, his weight settling deliciously against mine. My lips part with an anxious warning against my tongue but the words are lost as his mouth covers mine.
All the tension in my body drifts away as my chest melds against his. Warm fingers skim along my jaw, angling my mouth up to his as his tongue slips inside. His other hand presses firmly against my back and pushes lower and lower until his long fingers brush against the curve of my ass and the back of my thigh.
Each stroke of his tongue has me arching against his body to get closer to him. My hands slip beneath his shirt to feel every solid line of his stomach.
I thought flying high in the sky was the most adrenaline, freeing feeling in the world.
I was wrong.
I was incredibly wrong.
His hold on me is strong and demanding and makes me want to know what it’d feel like to be fucked against a palace door. Harder he pins me against that door as his teeth rake across my lower lip and a whimpering sound hums through me. At the fragile sound of my lust, his fingers along the back of my thigh dig into my skirt, dangerously close to my sex.
“Ma’am, my lord wanted me to check if there was anything else you needed tonight.” The quiet sound of Marg’s voice is like a new douse of water over my incredibly heated skin.
I tear my mouth away from Kain’s and it takes him several seconds to pull away from me. When he does, the hard outline in his jeans does nothing to hide what we were just doing.
With a shaking hand I push my fingers over my swollen lips and try hard to steady my breath despite the rapid rising and falling of my chest.
Marg’s big eyes wait for my reply.
Complete patience is in this woman.
“Um, no. No, I think—I think I’m just kind of tired and I’ll just you know, go to bed early. Alone.” I nearly yell out the last word on an urgent tone. “I’m going to bed early, alone.” The continuous nod of my head is jarring and I’m mentally glaring at the pathetic frail sound of my little voice.
Kain shifts at my side and the moment he moves, her gaze flickers to him for only a fleeting second before she darts her attention back to me.
“I’ll be sure to tell him.”
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
“You’ll tell him, I’m going to bed or … ”
A piece of Marg’s hair slips free and falls into her face. It reminds me how young she is. Young and innocent and beautiful.
“Ma’am it’s not my job to report … incidents to the Prince.”
Incidents. There’s that word again. Why is my life filled with incidents?
“My job is to keep everyone in his house happy and comfortable. Gossip doesn’t make anyone happy or comfortable. It definitely wouldn’t make Linden happy. It’s my job to keep him happy.” Her words are quieter and suddenly I wonder if there are other words she’ll never say.
She wants to keep him happy. Because he’s her boss or because … she likes him? Linden has trailed after me while this pretty woman has been in his castle the whole time.
Not that either one of us are suitable for the Prince. The idea that I’m not good enough for him doesn’t hurt me because I’ve never liked Linden like that … but this woman does.
And she’ll never have him.
My stomach sinks as I realize I know what that feels like.
“Thank you, Marg,” I whisper.
Her lips tense with an almost smile but it doesn’t meet her eyes.
“Good night, Lady Arlow.”
Lady Arlow.
It’s not everyday someone calls me a lady, I’ll be honest.
She turns, and the moment her fading footsteps lead her out of sight, I’m spinning to face the man behind me. The shadows of the hall darken his hair, muting his handsome features even as he smiles at me.
“Why the hell did you do that?”
His palm presses low on my back and once again my body fits nicely against his.
“Because I knew you never would.” His words cause my mouth to part but I have nothing to say to that. “I just wanted to tell you good night. I didn’t hear you complaining about it a few minutes ago.” His lips hover over mine, teasing and taunting me.
My palms flatten against his chest and I have to put real thought into not moving them up and down to feel every single perfect inch of his body.
“Well my mouth was being suffocated or I would have.”
“Suffocated?” His eyes widen with outrage even as a smile hesitates against his lips. “Suffocating doesn’t sound like what my tongue was doing to yours.” His low voice rumbles against my mouth, making me almost close the small space between us just to feel the humming sensation of it against my lips.
With a single step he pins me against the door once more, threatening to put me right back in the same situation we were in just moments ago.
“Tell me you like it when I kiss you.” His serious words dive right through me and twirl low in my stomach. “Tell me you like it.” His lips just barely brush against mine, stealing my breath away with the smallest touch.
I lean into him and he pulls just slightly back, making me chase the kiss of his lips. A dark and taunting smile lights up his eyes.
“I more than like it.” I breath out the confession and the smile against his lips widens. My hand drifts down his solid abdomen before sneaking behind my back.
Right now, I feel both weak and empowered just from the feel of his body against mine. There’s this strange struggle between us to see who can hide their feelings more.
Tonight, it’s going to be me.
“I do too,” he whispers just as his head dips low. The moment he almost presses his lips to mine, I turn the door handle. The weight of our bodies quickly pulls me away from him as I follow the door as it opens. He staggers but catches himself. His brows lower with confusion as his pretty eyes watch me slip inside my room.
“Good night, Kain.” I lean into the glossy door and the moonlight within my room cuts across his features, lightening his skin tone even more.
He shakes his head before pushing his hand roughly through his hair.
“Night, Arlow.”
And with swagger that almost has me pulling him back to me, he walks away.
Twelve
The Frost Beneath the Surface
The moment the door closes, the breath in my lungs shakes out in a heap of emotions that I haven’t felt in years. It takes me several seconds to just think through the messy thoughts that are turning in my mind.
“You seem to put a lot of effort into making sure the world doesn’t see who you really are, My Tamer.” The sound of Rime’s steady voice makes the nerves within me scatter.
I turn against the soft carpet and there in a straight back chair sits the coldest dragon I’ve ever had the displeasure to meet. He sits with perfect posture while pieces of his messy blond hair pull away at his proper appearance. One leg is crossed loosely over the other and he, strangely, looks like he fits here. He appears every bit like the royal monarchs in the paintings that line the halls of this monstrous estate.
The couch he had pushed in front of the door is now back in its proper place. Rime himself is barricading the room it seems. He faces the door that connects my room with Linden’s and
I take my time walking toward my bed as if I’m not bothered by his sudden interest in me at all. All this interest in me just because my room is adjoined with the Prince’s. I’ll never understand it. My fingers find the buttons that line my lower back and I start to undo them the best I can. The soft fabric loosens as I work.
“I’ve spent my entire life hiding who I really am. Today is no different.” My kiss with Kain is no different than my magic or identity that I’ve hidden for so long now.
The dress drops to the floor in a puddle around my feet and I can’t help but look up at him when the silence lingers on. The moonlight washes out his features into shades of frost blue and those icy eyes are trailing down my stomach. His attention lingers on the lace fabric of my underwear before he looks away.
I wonder if he’s remembering the way I tasted. The way he made me feel. The way he made me come.
Before we ruined things.
Before I ruined things.
There’s always this back and forth between us. One minute he looks like he’d risk his life for me and the next he looks like he’d sacrifice me to the goddess just for the promise of fair weather. I can’t help but wonder why he is the way he is. Rage snaps and crackles within him. He’s distrusting. I know that. But it’s so much deeper than the normal cautiousness that everyone has. It isn’t that you have to give him a reason not to like you, it’s that you have to give him several reasons to actually consider liking you. And I apparently don’t make the cut.
“Good night, My Little Faker.”
My eyes narrow at him as a wave of magic drops a silk nightgown over my body. He called me a faker once before but it’s different now. It isn’t because of my ability to give a fake orgasm. It’s because … he thinks I’m fake in general.
And maybe he’s right. I don’t even know anymore.
Dreams of Kain shifting in crimson smoke assault my mind. In the dream he kisses me, sweet and tenderly. There’s this look in his eyes that holds there, his features flickering into Sinister’s for one dark moment. And then the smoke of his dragon tears him away in twirling red colors. Just before the scales pull the man away and turn him into a dragon, a hellhound rips through his chest, shredding his skin away to allow the beast within to come out.
My eyes flinch open to the darkness. Sweat clings to my neck as I kick at the heavy covers constricting my body. I kick so hard a small scream stifles out of me, shaking through my chest to be heard. When I sit up, Rime’s pale eyes lock with mine.
His bored expression studies me for a moment, checking over my flushed skin before pulling his attention back to stare a hole through the door that leads to Linden’s room.
Silence passes around us and when he speaks again it confuses me.
“Will you ever go back to the village that didn’t accept you?” The slow draw of his words is right in place.
But there’s no undertone of anger in his tone like there normally is. It’s a curious question. It’s as if he genuinely wants to know something about me.
I consider the home I left behind all those years ago in search of an adventure. In search of myself.
I guess I found just that. A terrible adventure and a terrible person that is myself.
“I hope so.” I pause and not only does the sea and all its beauty wash through my mind but so does my mother and her deep blue eyes. My father and his charming smile. The affectionate way they used to look at each other when they thought I wasn’t paying attention. I miss them.
I miss them so badly my chest aches just thinking about them.
“I hate that you hide yourself when there’s so many people who could accept you if you’d let them.” He doesn’t look at me as he says it.
Maybe he doesn’t realize that being an outlawed mage and being a majestic dragon are two very different things. But I don’t want to fight with him. Especially when he seems to be trying to connect with me. He’s trying in his own way.
So, I will too. I push from the bed until I’m sitting on the edge, where I can see him better. Slowly I walk toward him, drifting through the room to give me something to do. He watches me, he watches the sway of my hips as I walk, and I try to think of something to say that might bridge the gap I feel between us.
“I used to focus on the way my mother hid me away because of my magic.” My voice dips just slightly, barely allowing the whisper to sneak out. “I don’t know why I ignored all the things she sacrificed because of my magic; all the friends and family she avoided just to keep me safe. I only saw the bad. You were right, Rime.” My gaze meets his as guilt sinks through me. “My selfishness is ugly.”
I stop pacing and stand near his chair. His gaze shifts over my features and as a breath trembles through my chest I have to look away. I can’t look at the pity in his eyes. I’d much rather see the aggression he always holds. That’s easier to deal with by far.
Warm fingers press to my outer thighs, skimming over the smooth skin there. His big palms wrap around my legs and with one swift move he pulls me forward until my knees buckle and I fall onto his lap. I stare down at him, his hips positioned below mine as I straddle him, making sure to keep plenty of space between us as I hold myself up. My fingers tense against his smooth shoulders and energy twirls through me, changing my emotions in less than a second simply from his closeness.
His palms drift higher, stroking against the silk of the night gown as he pushes his palm up to my hip. The hem of the gown rises as he travels up my stomach, revealing the lace of my panties to him before falling back down. He watches his hand against my body and the breath that’s caught in my lungs seems to be waiting for him as well.
Up the side of my arm and across my shoulder bone he skims those long and steady fingers before finally clasping the side of my neck. His thumb traces the curve of my jaw before he finally meets my eyes again.
“Sometimes,” the low rumble of his voice hums all through me, “sometimes it’s okay to be selfish, My Tamer.”
The way he touches me tingles through my body and I can’t think of a thing to say to him. My gaze drifts to his lips but I can’t find the courage to actually kiss him. To actually care about him.
To risk the safety of my heart.
“There are defining moments in our lives. Things so big it changes our lives forever.” His attention falls to his hand as his thumb drifts lower to the corner of my mouth before brushing quickly away. “Those selfish moments may have changed your life, but they don’t have to define you as a person.”
His words of intensity make my heart pound faster.
All this time that Rime’s silenced his thoughts with brooding looks and angry words. And this is what he’s been hiding, intelligence and compassion.
Who knew?
“You act like you’ve had experience with life changing moments.” Slowly I settle against his hips, letting the space between us disappear without thought.
Shadows line one side of his beautiful face, slicing over it with darkness while the other half is pale with light.
“I never knew my parents. I don’t know one thing about where I came from. I grew up in the coldest part of the Northern Kingdom and for the most part, I grew up as a dragon. It was easier. Safer.” The quiet, seriousness of his voice has me hanging on his words. “When I was a little older, I came across a town. There was a merchant selling some sort of candy and I wanted it so badly. You don’t know desperate until you’ve seen a kid who’s never tasted sweets before.” There’s a sad sort of reminiscing smile on his lips and my mouth tilts to feel his happiness, but it’s off. The sound of his voice doesn’t reflect that smile at all.
“I was naked and dirty as hell and the moment I stepped into the street, an older man spotted me. I remember his name even if I tell myself I don’t. He bought me that candy. He asked me where my mother was, but I didn’t know how to respond to him. The sparkling interest in his eyes made me trust him. He was the first person to accept me.” His gaze lingers on his hand against my skin, but his att
ention is lost entirely. “For months he took care of me as if I was the son he never had. Clothes and hot food like I’d never had before. He built onto his own house just for me. I was homeless and he gave me a home. My room was an addition to his own. A thin, creaking door separated my bedroom from his.” The more he speaks the more my stomach starts to twist as if my nerves know something my mind hasn’t caught up to yet. “He taught me so much. He taught me how to read even. But one night everything changed.” The lost look in his gaze and the silence of his story has me shifting closer to him just make sure he knows that I’m there. My fingers thread through his blond hair, pushing at the locks and trying to connect with him in some way.
But he feels impossible to reach.
I always wondered where Rime’s hate stemmed from. I knew there was something that cut out the kindness in him and infected him with disdain. And I knew there was more to him than what he showed on the surface.
I just never expected him to tell me.
The next time he speaks, the quiet sound of his voice breaks my heart completely.
“That was the last time I ever trusted anyone so easily.”
I know for a fact he doesn’t want the pity that’s in my eyes right now. The same way I didn’t want his. Empty words don’t change someone’s past.
But actions do.
I lean into him, tilting my head down until he’s forced to meet my gaze. My nose nearly touches his and all I can think about is how frost kissed his eyes look, big and bright and shining into mine.
“Our pasts changed our lives. But so does our present sometimes.”
Confusion shadows his face even as I close that small distance between us and brush my lips softly against his. He tenses beneath me for less than a second before his control snaps into place and he pushes hard against my lips until they part for him. A mixture of tingling lust and complete fear of falling twirls through me but the moment his tongue slides against mine, all that fear slips away.
The way Rime kisses me is different. There’s aggression even in the way he kisses. It shows each time his teeth rake across my lip hard enough to hurt but it’s masked with the gentle strokes of his tongue like he’s apologizing with sensual flicks and caresses.
