She nodded, smiling at what he had said, there was a certain truth to it, and then she looked at Jack with a question. What was Paul's mother like? She had met her briefly at the wedding, but it had been hard to tell, there had been so much going on, so many guests, so many important details.
Barbara? He looked surprised at the question. She was a monster. Actually, she was the one who cured me from ever wanting to be married, and I'm sure she would tell you the same thing about me, if you asked her. Except of course that she was foolish enough to remarry. I can hardly remember being married to her anymore, fortunately. She left me nineteen years ago. Next year, I'm planning to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of my independence. They were both laughing as he said it.
Jack Watson, you are awful and irreverent. I bet if the right woman came along you'd marry her in a minute. You're just too busy chasing starlets and models to find her.
How would you know? he asked, feigning innocence, but convincing no one, certainly not Amanda.
I read the papers, she said smugly, and he had the grace to look embarrassed for an instant.
Well, however that may be, I can assure you that if I met Mrs. Right or Miss Right, I would head for the tallest building and leap to the street immediately. I've learned my lesson. I'm being honest with you, Amanda. I couldn't do it.
That's how I feel now, although for different reasons. Oh well, it's not a problem I have to face for the moment, she said with a small sigh as they reached her front door and she turned to thank him. I had a lovely time, Jack, thank you for taking such good care of me, and taking me to dinner to talk about the children. He looked a little startled when she said it, and then he smiled and nodded.
I'll call and tell you what Paul says, he reiterated, and she thanked him again, unlocked her door, went inside, and closed it behind her. She heard the limo drive away as she turned on the light, and was surprised to realize how wrong she had been about him. He was a womanizer certainly, and he made no secret of it, and yet there was far more to him than that. There was something oddly endearing about him, like a young boy gone wild, but with a look in his eyes that made you want to hug him.
For an instant, it almost made warning bells go off in her head. Men like Jack were dangerous, even for fifty-year-old widows, and yet she knew she had nothing to fear from him. He had his chorus line of women, and all they really had in common was their children. But as Jack rode back to Rodeo Drive to check that the store had been properly put to bed, he sat back against the seat and closed his eyes, and all he could see in his mind's eye was Amanda.
Chapter Four
Amanda didn't hear from Jan for the next few days, and Jack called her a week after the party. He said he had something to tell her, and invited her to come to the store, and have lunch with him in his office. And she accepted without any hesitation. She knew full well that his only motive in calling her was to talk about their children.
He was waiting for her downstairs when she arrived and ushered her upstairs to his private office, where lunch had been set up for them with a starched white tablecloth and napkins on the conference room table. They were left alone, and ate lobster salad and caviar and drank Champagne. It was a very elegant little luncheon.
Do you do this every day? she asked, teasing him, and he said only when he wanted to impress someone. Then consider me impressed, because I am. I eat yogurt every day out of the container.
Well, it seems to work. You have an incredible figure, Amanda. She blushed at what he said, and then they moved on to talk about their children. He said he had had lunch with Paul, and had brought the subject up casually, as casually as one could bring up a subject like that one. He had inquired about why they hadn't gotten around to having children, and Jack said that Paul had been pretty candid about it, and told him much the same thing as Amanda. He had also admitted that he really didn't want to go to a doctor about it. Paul thought it was embarrassing, and he felt as though his manhood and virility were being questioned. But after a lengthy conversation with his father, he had finally agreed to do something about it, even though he didn't want to. He had promised to go to the doctor with Jan right after Christmas. Apparently, her doctor was on vacation until then.
So I would say, our mission has been accomplished. The first stage of it anyway. Operation Grandchild is in its early stages.
Amanda was impressed with how good the results had been, and the fact that he had cared enough to do it, and she sat back in her chair and smiled at him in amazement. Jack Watson, you are terrific. I can't believe it. Poor Jan has been begging him to go with her for the last year, and he wouldn't do it.
He's probably just afraid of me. I told him I'd disinherit him if he didn't. He smiled at her, pleased by her reaction. She was so obviously grateful to him.
Seriously, Jack, thank you. Poor Jan wants a baby so badly.
What do you suppose will happen if they can't? He looked worried as he asked her, and she looked concerned too, since Jan had told her that Paul was not in favor of adoption.
I guess they'll have to face this thing one step at a time. They can always adopt if they don't conceive, but it's hard to believe that in this day and age, with all the fancy methods they use to resolve infertility, they couldn't help them. I'm sure something good will come from all this, with a little patience.
Things are so damn complicated now, aren't they? In my day, if you were really lucky, it took you six months to get some girl in the back of your dad's car at the drive-in movie, and if you so much as shook hands with her, she got pregnant. Now everyone is being treated for infertility and having babies made in a petri dish, it sure takes the fun out of dating. Amanda couldn't help laughing at what he said. It was true, even in her marriage to Matt, she had frequently worried about getting pregnant. She just hoped that Paul and Jan got lucky now, and managed to have a baby. I'll keep you posted if I hear anything further, Jack promised.
So will I, Amanda assured him, and then he offered to walk around the store with her. She couldn't resist trying a few things, and he finally left her with the manager of the store and the best of their sales force, and she showed up in his office to thank him again two hours later.
Did you have fun? he asked her, as he stood up at his desk when she walked in the room. She looked happy and relaxed and she had had a great time shopping at Julie's.
I had a ball, and I bought everything in sight, including half a dozen really great bathing suits for next summer from your cruise line. She had also bought several beautiful nightgowns, a new dress, and a sensational black alligator handbag. I bought everything in sight, she said again, with a degree of embarrassment. I haven't been this extravagant ever in my life, but I have to admit I enjoyed it. She laughed as she confessed, and he found himself staring at how beautiful she was, and wondering how he could get her to have dinner with him.
Do you like Thai food? he suddenly asked her out of nowhere.
Why, do you sell that too? Is there a department I missed? A deli? She was laughing at him, and she looked sensual and young and happy.
Yes, actually, I'll show you where it is, he said convincingly. But it's at our other store, and you have to come in my car to get there.
Oh, you're a terrible liar, Jack Watson. You're trying to kidnap me and hold me for ransom, I just know it
What a good idea, he said, laughing with her. What are my chances?
Now? Tonight? It was already five-thirty, but the store was open till nine so their customers could shop for Christmas. You gave me lunch today, you don't have to feed me tonight too. I have another idea. Why don't you come out to the house a little later on, and I'll cook you dinner. Nothing fancy, just whatever I find in the fridge, more or less. I owe you one, a big one, for getting Paul to go to the doctor.
I'd love it. He accepted her invitation instantly, and promised to be there at seven o'clock to help her. And as soon as she left, he picked up the phone and canceled the date that he had set up weeks before for that eveni
ng. He claimed to have the flu, and the girl he called just laughed at him. She didn't really care, but she knew him a lot better than he suspected.
What's her name? The girl he had called couldn't resist a little teasing.
What makes you think it's another woman?
Because you're not gay, and you probably haven't had the flu since you were two. You sound fine to me, Jack ' good luck with whoever she is. She was seeing someone else anyway, and he thanked her for being so understanding.
He arrived at Amanda's door at exactly seven o'clock, and she was wearing a pair of gray slacks with a pale blue sweater set and a string of pearls. She looked like a young heiress, but she was wearing an apron.
Very domestic picture, he commented as he came in and set down a bottle of very fancy wine he had bought for her, and she laughed at his comment.
I hope so, after twenty-six years of marriage.
You know, I never thought of you that way before, domestic I mean, Jack confessed as he followed her into the kitchen and she thanked him for the wine. It was an excellent wine, and an impressive vintage. I only thought of you in terms of being a movie star. It's hard to forget who you were before. You even look the same. In fact, in my mind, I always think of you as Amanda Robbins, and not Amanda Kingston.
Matt hated that, she said simply. A lot of people used to say that.
Is that why you never went back? He was curious about her.
Probably. Matt wouldn't have wanted me to anyway. We talked about it a lot before we got married. I hadn't been at it long, but I was ready to give it up ' for something better ' a man I loved and a family.
And was it better? Were you happy? he asked, as he watched her.
I loved being with my kids, and with Matt. It was a good life. She looked pensive for a moment then, as she thought about it. It's hard to believe that it's over. Everything shattered so quickly. One minute he was leaving the house with his tennis racket in his hand, and the next he was gone, just two hours later. It's hard to adjust to.
Jack nodded. It sounds dumb to say it, but at least he didn't suffer.
I guess that's true, but we did. I wasn't prepared at all. He seemed so young. We never even talked about what would happen if one of us died. We never had time to think about it, or say good-bye, or ' Tears filled her eyes and she turned away, and suddenly Jack was behind her, holding her shoulders.
It's okay ' I know ' that's how it was for me with Dori. She had a car accident on the way to meet me. Head-on. She never knew what hit her. But I did. I felt like that goddamn truck had hit me. For a long time, I wished it would have. I kept wanting it to be me, and not her ' I felt so damn guitly.
So did I, Amanda said as she turned to look at him. He had kind eyes, they were a warm brown, and his hair was a sandy blond peppered with gray. He was astonishingly good-looking. For the last year, I kept wishing I had died instead of Matt. But for the last week or two, I'm suddenly glad I didn't. I've been enjoying my kids again, and doing little things' . It's funny how things change just the smallest bit, and it makes a difference. He nodded, and put on one of her aprons over the slacks and black turtleneck sweater he was wearing.
Okay, enough of this serious stuff, madam. What's for dinner? Do you want me to chop, grate, or puree, or would you rather just watch me get quietly drunk in your kitchen? I can do either. She laughed at him as he looked at her with amusement. It was so easy to be with him.
Why don't you sit and relax. Everything is pretty much done already. She poured him a glass of wine, did a few things in the kitchen, and half an hour later, they had steak, baked potatoes, and salad. She was a good cook, and they talked for hours, sitting at her kitchen table, and afterward they walked into the living room and he glanced at some of the pictures. They were a handsome family, though Matt always looked stiff to him, but Amanda looked lovely in every picture.
It's a shame you and your daughters are so ugly.
Your kids are just as good-looking as mine, she complimented him, and he laughed.
We just happen to be extremely attractive people. Everyone in Los Angeles is. They make the ugly people move to some other state, or town, or ship them over the border at midnight. They just round them up and off they go and no one ever sees them again ' poof ' no more ugly people. He liked to play with her, and tease. It was easy to see why he had so much success with women.
Don't you get tired of it? she asked him honestly as they sat down. She felt as though she could ask him anything. They were friends now. All the women, I mean. I would think it would be exhausting to be with strangers all the time. I can't even imagine having to deal with it, starting all over again constandy, asking all those tedious questions. '
Stop! He put up a hand with a groan. You're destroying my lifestyle. If you make me question it, I may not be able to do it. It's just one way of never getting involved. That's all. It's what I've needed ever since Dori.
I'd rather watch TV, or read a book, Amanda said honestly, and he laughed.
Well, actually ' that could be the essence of the difference between men and women. Up until now, if the choice was book, TV, or women, I would have to pick women. But if you make me think about it with any seriousness, I may have to buy myself a new TV set tomorrow morning.
You're hopeless.
I am. It used to be part of my charm, but I can see that it's rapidly becoming a liability. Maybe we shouldn't discuss this.
They talked about other things then, their families when they were young, their dreams, their ambitions, their careers, and once again their children. And the night flew by again. It was after midnight when he finally left her. And not quite nine o'clock when he called her the next morning to thank her for dinner. She was still sleeping.
Did I wake you? He seemed surprised. She looked like one of those early-rising people, and normally she was, but she had stayed up late the night before, trying to read, and thinking about him.
No, not at all. I was up, she lied, looking at the clock and surprised at what time it was. She had a dentist appointment to have her teeth cleaned, and she was about to miss it.
You're lying, he said with a grin at his end. You were sound asleep and I woke you. The life of the indolent rich. I've been at my desk since eight-thirty. He had had a number of calls to make to Europe, where it was nine hours later. But she had been preying on his mind, and he had decided to call her on the spur of the moment. And now, hearing her, he was unexpectedly nervous. How about dinner tonight? he asked without preamble, and her eyes opened wide, wondering if she had heard him correctly.
Tonight? She had nothing planned, although the following day she had been invited to a Christmas party. I ' aren't you going to get tired of me?
I don't think that's possible, and we have a lot to catch up on, don't we?
Like what? She lay on her back and stretched, remembering exactly what he looked like.
Both our lives. Between us that covers a hundred and ten years, it could take a while, and I figured we really ought to get started, though we made some good inroads last night.
Is this how you do it? she smiled. All that charm? A hundred and ten years ' what a way to think about it. Well, all right, as long as you put it that way, we'd better do it. What did you have in mind?
How about dinner at L'Orangerie? I'll pick you up at seven-thirty.
Sounds wonderful. I'll be ready. But as soon as she hung up, she panicked. She sat up in bed and stared across the bedroom she had shared for twenty-six years with her husband. What in God's name was she doing? Was she playing Girl of the Hour with Jack Watson? How stupid was she? She got out of bed and decided to call him to cancel. But as soon as she called, Glad-die told her he had gone into a meeting, but she could leave him a message. But it seemed so rude to just leave him a message saying she couldn't have dinner with him, so she said that it was nothing important.
He called her back at noon anyway, and when she answered the phone, he sounded worried. Any thing wrong? Are you okay? He actu
ally sounded as though it mattered to him, which was even more unnerving.
I'm fine ' I just thought ' oh, I don't know, Jack, I was just feeling stupid. I don't want to be the Flavor of the Month. I'm a married woman, or at least I was ' or I still am ' in my own mind, and I don't know what the hell I'm doing with you, or what game I'm playing. I can't even bring myself to take off my wedding band, and now I'm having dinner with you every night, and I have no idea where this is going. She looked and felt exhausted when she finished talking, and at his end, he sounded calm, although he didn't feel it.
I don't know where this is going either. And if it'll make you feel any better, I'll buy a wedding band too, and then at least we'll be even. People will think we're both cheating on our spouses. I just know I enjoy your company more than I've enjoyed anyone in years, maybe ever. And I can't tell you more than that. All of a sudden, the life I've led for twenty years looks like a bad joke in the back of Playboy. I'm embarrassed by it, I want to get rid of it, and God help me for saying this, but I want to be the kind of person you'd be proud to be seen with, because I'm so damn proud to be with you, I can't stand it.
But I'm not ready for a relationship, she said mournfully. I don't want to start dating. It's only been a year since I lost Matt, and I don't know what I'm doing with you ' but I love talking to you too ' and I don't want to stop, but maybe we should. Do you think we should cancel dinner tonight? Do you think this is wrong? She sounded so worried that he just wanted to put his arms around her and hug her.
It's going to be all right, he said gently, we're not going to do anything you don't like. We'll just talk about our kids, and relax. It doesn't have to be more than that for now ' or maybe ever. It cost him dearly to say that, but he didn't want to frighten her, or worse yet, to lose her, before he even won her over. Suddenly it all mattered to him greatly. And then he had another thought. Maybe we should go somewhere a little less public for dinner' . L'Orangerie was one of the best restaurants in L.A., and they were bound to be seen there. Wliat about some little bistro, or even a pizza?
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