by Lexy Wolfe
"That is too little time, Kiya," Nolyn half begged, half argued. "You are too young to give up living—"
Her smile was unsettlingly serene. "I have almost died many times since I came to Forenta. You have given me more time than I might have had already. It will have to be enough, if I am the one who must return to Desantiva." She put her arms around him as he crushed her in an embrace with an anguished sound. She pointed out, "The storm is passed. You can create light. We can return to the others."
He caught her by the hand. "Wait." He dropped his eyes as he rested his hand on her abdomen. "Kiya, I cannot see as your people can if you are… able to conceive a child or not. And right now, I do not want to know." He looked up when she put her hand on his chin, peering into his eyes. "After all this is over and we have returned to Ithesra, I want to be with you. As a season mate or just a th'yala. Whatever you want us to be. You do not need to tell me if it makes the choice easier for you. I would be happy with being either, whether you leave or stay."
Star blinked. "But if I would have to leave and I am with child, you will never know him or her—"
"My heart, I would rather know a part of me was with you in our child than imagine you suffering being alone ever again." He smiled reassuringly as he tucked a tendril of hair behind her ear. "A child would give you a reason to live, a part of me by your side to temper the hurt parting would cause you." Without warning, she threw her arms around his neck, kissing him passionately. When she finally let the kiss end, and tugged her cloak free before beginning to unlace her tunic, he argued half-heartedly, "You don’t have to—"
"There is no 'have to' in my need and want to be with you. I had already decided what I wanted long before now, Nolyn Lirai, but I could not clearly see what you desired," Star stated. "Now I know without doubt what you want. Nothing else is there to clutter your heart."
She turned a loving smile up at him. "Desanti live life knowing any moment could be their last. I may die today. I may live long enough to become one of the Elders. It is the same for you, because you live life, not simply exist. No matter what happens, I do not want you living with doubts in your heart about us." She slipped the tunic off and tossed it to the side, holding her arms out to him. "Nor any regrets we waited too late to share everything." He hesitated only a heartbeat before he pulled her to him, burying his face against her neck.
Chapter 87
Awakening slowly, Nolyn smiled as he felt Star shift in her sleep, her slender body warm and pliable against his. His fingers gently followed the savage lines of scars that marked her encounter with the Oolak-possessed Endarian. Not even the slightest flicker of anger towards the fallen Trisari marred his admiration for this delicate-seeming young woman. "You are so incredible," he murmured. Thinking about the hours before, he could not help but smile as a feeling of peace settled over his heart. "A perfect way to usher in the winter solstice."
A gust of cold air brushed over them, drawing him out of the hazy world between sleep and wakefulness. "I suppose I should heat the stones again until we are dressed to head back." His voice faltered when he opened his eyes to see a falcon-like bird perched on the top of the pyramid of rocks. He could only stare at the creature as it calmly preened itself. Its green-gold eyes did not leave the pair at all.
The sudden tension in Nolyn roused Star. "Beloved, what is it?" she asked. The moment she saw the bird, she froze, staring. "But that is not possible," she whispered. The bird paused in its preening to fix its eyes on the Desanti woman, hissing as a crest rose and feathers ruffled briefly before it returned to preening. As it ran its beak down one of the long tail feathers, a flicker of flame appeared, then vanished.
"I have never seen or heard of such a creature in Forenta," Nolyn murmured. He sat up warily so as not to frighten the bird away or draw it to attack. He shrugged into his shirt, but the bird seemed oblivious as it continued to preen its long, curling tail feathers one by one. Each time it got to the end, a small burst of flame appeared then vanished almost immediately. He began to reach out to touch it.
"Wait!" Star grabbed his wrist to stop him just as the bird turn and shrieked at him. Wings fanned out wide as flames burst around it and danced over its metallic feathers gleaming in streaked bronze, gold, and copper. As quickly as the flames had appeared, the bird's feathers smoothed down again, flames fading. It calmly resumed preening, its gaze unwavering. "You cannot just touch him without asking him permission," she told him.
"You know what that is?" Nolyn asked as he picked up her tunic and draped it around her shoulders.
She shook her head. "No, but Citali knows. He says there used to be two kinds of their breed within Desantiva. We called the common ones firebirds. We called the rare ones phoenix." She dressed slowly, watching the bird as much as the bird watched her. "No human or Totani has seen either in Desantiva since…" Her voice dropped to a pained whisper. "Since their Totani died."
"What is a Desanti bird doing here in Forenta?" Nolyn finally tore his eyes away from the bird to look at Star. Concern for her pushed past the shock and awe of seeing the strange avian. "Are you all right? You are so pale."
"You do not know… you could not know." Star swallowed. "Firebirds are extinct in Desantiva. No phoenix has ever been seen since… not since the Great War when… when life and magic was ripped from the land. When Zhekali the Phoenix and many other Totani died. Not even by the Totani.A few humans journey into the Rumblelands to try to find one. Few return alive, none ever having found more than a firebird. Legends say the feather of a phoenix can heal any wound, physical or spiritual."
Nolyn fastened his belt then worked on getting his boots back on. "An interesting story. But it doesn't explain…" He looked at her. "Is it you or Citali that knows its—" The bird glared at him, squawking at him belligerently. "—his gender?"
Star could not help but giggle, hiding her smile behind her hand. "Citali knows." Dressed with quick efficiency, she knelt before the bird, offering her hand to the creature. "My Totani says you are a phoenix?" Flipping his wings back, the bird chirped. It stretched out to nibble her offered fingers.
"I would think that a god or divine servant could find anything they wanted in the mortal world," Nolyn pointed out. He drew back at the affronted look the bird turned on him. "If I did not know better, I would say he understands what we are saying." Feathers fluffed, the bird squatted down on his perch, narrowing his eyes at Nolyn. "Oh, come on. Will you stop making me feel guilty?" he exclaimed, feeling his face turn red as Star giggled behind both hands.
The bird chirped at him, turned his back on the mage, and flipped his tail up at him briefly, in what could only be interpreted as a rude gesture. The man sighed, putting his face in his palm. "An extinct bird of Desanti legends has insulted me. My life is complete." He held up his other hand at Kiya and said automatically without looking at her, "It is a figure of speech, not that I am going to die now."
"Oh." Star shook her head and looked to the bird. "Are you a young phoenix?"
Nolyn regarded her with a puzzled expression. "What kind of question is that?"
Sitting back on her heels, she put her hands in her lap. "A phoenix is not a different species of firebird. They are…" She frowned, searching for a good word. "Mature firebirds. And the gods and divine servants can't find his kind because they are a paradox. Paradoxes simply happen, and not even the ancient trinity can find, expect, nor control them. That is why there must be divine and mortal servants to keep these paradoxes from disrupting the great balance. No matter how you define such paradoxes, you are wrong. And right. They just…" She held her hand to the bird again. "They just… are." She looked at the phoenix. "Are you the last of your kind?" The bird turned away, nibbling at the base of his tail like any other preening parrot.
"So, was that a yes or a no?" Nolyn wondered. "I defer to your — and Citali's — greater wisdom."
"Neither. He did not answer me," Star replied, frowning delicately. Her frown vanished in shock when he looked back at
her, holding one of his tail feathers, bright copper in color, in his beak. She held out both hands, trembling as she lowered her eyes. "You… you honor me." He laid the feather across her palms. The feather burst into flames briefly, Star sitting upright, crying out in pain.
"Kiya!" Nolyn flinched away when he felt an impossibly great heat radiating from her back. She collapsed against him, tears of agonizing pain streaming down her cheeks as she clung to him. He wrapped one arm around her, surprised in the back of his mind the searing heat was gone as if it had never been there. "Kiya, my heart, are you all right?"
She nodded, shaking with emotion. "He… he healed me," she whispered. "The scars on my back… the pain… I can feel they are gone." She covered her face with both hands. "No one… my father… won't believe what I have faced here when—"
"Let me see," Nolyn said. As she undid her tunic and slid it off her shoulders, he blinked and traced his fingers across her smooth skin. "They are… not exactly gone. The skin looks undamaged, but the places your wounds had been are now a different color." He looked between Star's back and the bird. "The same color as the feather he gave you. Copper."
She looked up in momentary disbelief, then looked to the phoenix. "Thank you," she whispered. The bird chirped, stretching then flipping his wings back again. "I do not wish to sound ungrateful, but why are you here?" The bird leapt to the exit, the heat from the flames that bathed it melting the snow around the entrance piled against his magical barrier. Then he took flight, disappearing into the sky.
Pulling their cloaks and gloves on, the pair ran outside and looked around frantically. There was no sign of the enigmatic bird, however. They looked over when they heard their names being called. Seeker dismounted his drizzen before it stopped, running over to grab his sister in a fierce hug of relief. "Thank the Heart you are all right, Sister. I was so worried about you."
She smiled up at the tall man, touching his cheek. "Nolyn saved me again." Seeker's smile faltered as he blinked down at her for a moment before he hugged her with only a fraction less fierocity. "The spirits tormenting me have quieted to give me time to rest, but we must help them somehow before they start demanding my help again." Her smile fell. "I cannot endure hearing their pleas and be so helpless again."
The Swordanzen's expression looked quizzical as he put his hand on her back. "Your back. I do not feel the scars." He looked over at Nolyn while the mage spoke with Eptina and Valerian. "Did he…?"
With Seeker's half-started question reminding her, Star grabbed the front of her brother's cloak, pulling him off balance in her urgency. "There is a phoenix here, Rengi! He gave me one of his feathers to heal the injuries I had from our battle with Oolak. We must find him!"
Seeker straightened, barely noticing the shock of pain with Anibu's communion with him as the Totani reached out to listen. "What?" She turned, lifting her tunic to show the gleaming copper slashes on her back. The three other Swordanzen walked over, instantly focused on the Su'alin. Seeker looked from the others back to his sister. "A phoenix? In Forenta? Why is he here?"
"I don't know, but we must find him! He is the key to-to something! I don't know how I know, but I know he is. We were sheltering there under that tree and when we woke up, he was there. When I asked what he wanted, he flew out and now we don't know where he went." Star's agitation was infectious, the woman calming when Seeker squeezed her shoulder.
"Anibu can lend me his awareness," he stated. "Perhaps there is a trace we can scent." Star nodded, hugging herself. He closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. The man's dark eyes popped open, tendons bulging with sudden tension. "I am unsure of the phoenix, but we are not the only humans within the barrier. These carry the scent of murder with them."
"What?!" Rockspar scowled. "We have left the others unprotected at the book tree." She looked at Pacer. "We should split up to ensure none are left vulnerable."
"Go! Be swift," Seeker stated in a low voice. "And be wary. Northborn may not all bear magic, but their numbers are still a danger to us. Do not be careless." To Star, he stated, "Ride with me, Sister."
She looked affronted. "I can ride my own—"
"I can afford no distractions," he stated flatly. "Please, let me feel I protect you at least a little." She sighed and nodded in agreement.
Valerian looked over from where he spoke with Eptina and Nolyn. Getting their attentions, he nodded towards the five Desanti. "It looks like they are mobilizing for war," he observed under his voice for their ears alone. Their concern turned to alarm when Rockspar and Pacer nodded once to the Githalin Swordanzen, leaping onto their drizzen and racing away back towards the library.
"Githalin Seeker, what is going on?" Nolyn demanded as the other man took Star's hand and pulled her up onto his drizzen's back.
Seeker turned his feral gaze to Nolyn and the others. "There is enemy within the barrier. Rockspar and Pacer go to guard the others. We must find these intruders before they discover the phoenix." He added grimly, "The scent of death is heavy with them, if I can smell their stench from here."
Nolyn did not speak, waving a hand for Seeker to go. The other man nodded once before the three drizzen took off. "I will explain once we deal with—" The mage uttered an inarticulate sound, grabbing his right hand and staggering a step before falling to his knees.
"Nolyn! What is it?" Eptina asked in worry.
"It's Ash. Something…" He shook his head. "It has nothing to do with here," Nolyn stated through clenched teeth. "We cannot help the Illaini Magus, he is too far from us. We need to catch up to the Desanti." He staggered to his feet with Valerian and Eptina's help.
Eptina held him back from mounting his horse. "Ride with me," she ordered him curtly.
"I can—" he began when she cut him off with an icy look.
"And risk being at a dead run if this happens again and you fall off to break your neck? I'd rather not answer to Ellis why I let that happen." She pulled him with her then mounted, looking down at him. "Swallow your pride, Edai Magus of Verusia. Get on my horse." He managed a rueful smile and relented, taking her offered hand.
Chapter 88
Ana and Tobias sat at one of the reading tables just inside the doors into the spiraling library of Andar, looking at the artwork in Sula's journal. Marcus smiled a little before turning away. He looked up at the rest of the library with a sigh and made himself take steps to start the climb.
What is the matter? He heard Endarian's voice in his mind. You would rather be out looking for your master than exploring a library that has been hidden away from the world for some twenty years?
"You are supposed to be sleeping so you can heal," the apprentice replied defensively. He felt the Trisari's mind tickle his, the flash of his amusement mingled with guilt at the past memories he touched of the time since he and Nolyn had first encountered Endarian. The boy's cheeks warmed with embarrassment.
I believe the mortal saying is 'the pot calling the kettle black?' You should not be ashamed. Nolyn Lirai is more than worthy of your loyalty and affection. He bears the same for you. The voice in his mind paused a moment. What troubles you, Marcus Kyrie?
Marcus stopped to lean over the rail that looked out into the space between the tree's heart and its walls. He gazed down where one of the spokes had widened to become a new floor. "I am an apprentice. I should be focused on learning. On getting more knowledge to honor our great mother. I want to make Master Nolyn proud and prove that he did not make a mistake taking me as his apprentice, that any lowborn can be a mage. Illaini Magus Terrence isn't just some freak of nature." He closed his eyes. "Lowborn worry about people more than knowledge. Highborn are born to be mages."
Endarian was silent for a time. Humans are curious creatures, Marcus. Their limitations come as much from how they were born as how they grew.
The boy frowned at that statement. "What are you talking about? You have to be born with power to be strong in magic. You can't be a great mage without being strong."
Marcus was surprised at the
sudden sadness he felt from the Trisari. I see that our legacy endures without us. I wonder if the same endures with the Totani.
Turning to continue walking up the ramp, Marcus was more curious about what Endarian was talking about than the many books and scrolls he passed. "What legacy?"
What were you taught about the First Sundering? I can sense it is very little. Just that was when the Knowing One came to be? Marcus nodded, listening so closely he bumped into a table. Have you never wondered what the world had been like before the First Sundering? When there was only one human nation?
"Wait, you mean that Desanti and Forenten were… part of the same nation?" He shook his head. "No way. That's impossible! We are too different."
They were indeed the same nation. That does not mean they were alike. There were those who preferred peaceful learning to more physical pursuits among their number, just as there were those who preferred the opposite. Nevertheless, back then, they worked together to survive. Those who would become mages studied the world, learned its strengths and weaknesses. Those who would become warriors challenged the world, learned its strengths and weaknesses.
"They were doing the same thing? Just doing it… differently?" Marcus asked.
Yes. Some were born naturally inclined to one or the other in form. Some were raised to one or the other focus. Those who became great were the ones who not only were born naturally inclined or raised to one form or the other, but wanted it as well. Greatness is an aberration, a freak of nature, as you put it. It is a confluence of many factors, many choices, and it is only discovered afterwards. It cannot be predetermined, and it cannot be repeated because it belongs to that great person alone.
