by Kara Hart
The park was lit up and full of people for the 4th of July fireworks show. Everyone was there. Mrs. Dobbins from down the street, John Maskins from the post office, even Jen’s teacher was there waiting for that grand finale explosion. Just being outside with everyone made me realize how long it had been since I had done something like this with Jen. It’s not that I didn’t want to. But raising a kid alone and trying to kick old habits made it hard to find the energy.
The night was beautiful. When they turned off the park lights, we could see every star so clearly. It was as if there were an infinite set of solar systems just like ours, and maybe, just maybe they were staring back at our dot of existence. The 4th of July was supposed to be this big, patriotic celebration of explosions and winning the war against the British. But when I really thought about it, it was a celebration that we were still here. We had survived and overcome ourselves and we would continue to fight and celebrate for generations to come.
“I never got to do this as a kid,” Lucas admitted, as we sat on the grassy hill overlooking the waterfront. The reflection of sparklers and neon glow-sticks shined across the water in front of us, as kids played tag, oblivious to how small their lives were in the grand scheme.
“Mom, can I go play with my classmates?” Jen asked me. She never played with anyone her age. Normally, she just hung out with me at the house. I looked at Lucas for confirmation it was safe.
“I don’t see why not. Just stay nearby and don’t leave the park,” he said. I still felt worried after what happened earlier. “It’ll be okay. It would be a huge mistake if Cade stuck around. This place is loaded with cops. Not to mention, you have me now. And I carry a loaded gun wherever I go.”
“Great,” I sighed. “I’m with a psychopath. And what do you mean I have you now?” I asked. Jen ran off with her friends nearby and I made sure to keep my motherly eye on her at all times.
“I just mean that tonight you have me. Jeeze, don’t get so paranoid. It’s not like I like you or something,” he said, smiling.
“Like hell you don’t,” I muttered.
“We had our fun. No need to prolong everything just for the sake of doing it. Plus, I’m not really the settling-down type of guy. I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said the other night and, well, you were right. I’m in the fucking mafia. Love isn’t part of my story.”
“That’s not what I meant,” I sighed, feeling confused about everything. My emotions were going haywire. Maybe I was about to start my period or something. Ugh. Or maybe it was just the stress from today. I didn’t know how to react toward anything now. I laughed and pulled my hair back. “Okay, maybe it was what I meant. But I shouldn’t have been so harsh about it.”
“Stop trying to let me down easy. I’ve had plenty of guns put in my face. I’ve been shot at by Brazilian pimps and chased down by the federales in Mexico City. I think you telling me you want nothing to do with me is something I can get over.” He chuckled to himself.
“Well. I’m sorry. And if it’s any consolation, I do like you being around. When you leave this town, it’ll be boring again.”
“You have Carmelo, right?” He laughed. “He’s got some stories, I bet.”
“Carmelo? Yeah, right. I know he played soccer in Sicily, but that’s about the wildest thing he’s told me about his life,” I said.
“I’m sure if you dig a little deeper, you’ll find something.” He laughed again. “In any case, I don’t think I’m going back to Detroit.”
“What? You have to, right? Don’t they kill mobsters who try and leave the life?”
“You watch too many movies. I’m the Don’s son. That means something to these people. Plus, I’ve kind of made things weird with my family. My brother is a fuck up and hates my guts. My father is banking on me becoming the next Don. But it’s not what I want. I need some time to lay low, you know? It’s not one-hundred percent yet, but I’m going to propose the idea to my dad. Once this job is finished.”
“You mean once you kill Cade?” I said, feeling a knot in my stomach start to form. Just the mention of his name made me want to vomit.
“I wasn’t going to kill the guy if he paid his debt. But now that I know more, now that he touched Jen, he better pray for his life.”
I tried not to think about it. Cade was evil to Jen and me. He had showed his worst side and forced us to leave the city that we loved and held so dear. It’s not that I wanted him dead. I wanted him to leave us alone. For good. But it didn’t seem like that was going to happen now. It was becoming quite obvious that he was incapable of leaving us alone.
“Where will you go?” I found myself asking. After Lucas had invaded this town, I didn’t want to think of a world without him. It was weird, but I actually enjoyed his company now. Whether that meant we were friends or fuck buddies or nothing at all, I wasn’t sure. But I was going to find out.
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe Phoenix. Somewhere in the middle of the desert. It’s weird, but something like that sounds kind of peaceful to me. Shit, maybe I’ll end up in Seattle.” He winked.
The fireworks went off with a bang and Jen came running back. “Mom?” she asked me, falling into my arms. She was getting so big, it was like holding a bag of a hundred bricks.
“Yes, baby?” I smiled.
“Can we do this forever?”
“Nothing lasts forever. But we can always try,” I said. The fireworks reflected off her dark pupils and she clapped after each short explosion.
“Will Lucas be our friend forever?” she asked. I turned to Lucas who was lying on the grass, smiling to himself. This was the first time he had been to a fireworks show. A grown man in the mafia. He looked like a child who finally gotten what he wanted out of life.
“I hope so, baby. I really do.” I breathed in deep and watched as a myriad of colors broke through the night sky. This was a night to remember, alright.
Lucas
“That bitch has you brainwashed!” my brother screamed. His cries echoed off the walls.
“Settle the fuck down, Ricky,” I said. “The good news is we’re closer to getting the son of a bitch. I thought you’d all be happy about the news. Instead, I have my brother crawling up my ass. Fuck this.” I lit up a cigar, a Cuban my father had given me. I was ready to go back to Monroe. These weekly visits to the city were proving to be too stressful for me.
My dad, Antonio, just looked at me out of two creased eyes. “Sounds like fantastic news to me,” he said.
Ricky was furious. He bore a black eye and it looked like I might’ve broken his nose during our last encounter. “But father—” He started speaking, but Antonio waved his hand in front of his face as if to say ‘Shut the fuck up.’
“Stop. Just stop, Ricky. I’ve heard enough of your bullshit. So what? He found a girl. Good for him. I’ve been waiting for one of my sons to find a responsible, good woman. Sounds like she’ll be good for the family,” he said. Of course, this was a huge blow to Ricky, who had lost his wife years ago. Dad never liked the woman, even though she was the best thing to have ever happened to him.
“He’ll tear down this family, pops. Do you want that to be a part of your legacy?”
Dad got out of his chair and walked slowly up to Ricky. He muttered under his breath, with scraping teeth and clenched fists “I want you to get one thing straight. Whatever happens to this family after I die is up to you two. It can fall into the gutter for all I care. I’ll be dead. My fortune will mean nothing to me. But I don’t see Lucas ruining this family. No, the only person I see ruining anything is you, Ricky. Quite frankly I don’t even know what we’re doing here talking about this. Congratulations, Lucas.” My father sat back down, blowing perfect smoke rings into the air.
Ricky’s face turned red. I interjected. “He’s blowing this all out of proportion. I’m not settling down. I’m just helping the woman out. She’s had a rough life, okay? Plus, she’s given me some good information on Cade. I got Vincenzo and his men on the hunt for him as well
. It won’t be long before we have him in this basement, begging for his life.” I made my case and I was ready to go home.
“Good, son. You work clean. In all the years you’ve been working for me, we’ve had no trouble on your side. No Fed action, no betrayals. You’ve been good to me.” He squeezed my cheek and lightly tapped it. “Ricky. It’s time you become more like your brother. You want a good position in this family? You want respect? Wise up and act like a made man for once in your life.”
The scene was fucking depressing. I gladly peeled out of that driveway and sped back to Monroe within the hour. It was like night versus day to me. I didn't even feel like I was a part of my family anymore. Seeing Dahlia and the way she treated Jen, I realized that there was more to family than I ever had experienced before. Part of me wanted that life. But deep down I was a killer and a thug.
My first “to do” on the list for the day was talk to Carmelo. If he had any information on Cade, now was the time to tell me. Thankfully, there was no need to chase him down. When I pulled into the driveway, there he was, smoking a cigarette, leaning against the house.
“Morning,” I said, getting out of the car to shake his hand.
“Did you have a party last night or something?” he asked, peering into the window to the house.
I unlocked it and walked into the debris and rubble from my violent episode the other day. “Sorry about the mess.” I kicked a piece of the wood table out of the way. “I'd offer you a drink, but as you can see, it's a mess in here.”
“It's fine. I shouldn't hang around too long anyway. Got a business to run in the morning,” he said. I had the strangest desire to ask him what the special was tomorrow, but I held back. Either way, I'd be in first in line.
“What do you got for me?” I sighed. It was getting tiring asking the same questions over and over.
“An address.” He threw an envelope on the ground. “Cade. We found him in an abandoned location nearby.”
“How nearby?” I stepped over a piece of glass and grabbed a cup of water. It must have been nearly a day since I had anything to drink.
“Parched?” he asked me. I couldn't help but wonder why he was asking.
“How nearby is he?” I repeated. The old man was acting funny, like he was in a hurry, practically dancing on his heels. I leaned against my dinged up counter and watched him out of the corner of my eye.
“Oh, right.” He regained some of his composure and put his hands in his pocket. “It's close. Down south, maybe two or three miles. By the water.”
By the water. I thought back to the other night with all the fireworks and distractions. He must've been watching us, somewhere in the crowd. He was most likely hovering nearby. It made me wonder just how long he’d been out there, waiting for me to discover his whereabouts. What exactly did he have in store for me? Or for Dahlia?
He began walking toward my front door. “You in a hurry?” I just watched him.
He threw his hands in the air with frustration. “I told you, I got a business to run. Do I have to explain every little thing I have to do the night before work? A café isn't easy. It doesn't run itself.”
I smiled. “I'm just messing with you. Go. I'll see you in the morning.”
“The morning?” he stuttered.
“For breakfast. Gotta have one of those famous quiches before I leave this town for good.” I laughed and showed him out.
“Right,” he said, pulling out a cigarette. It was curious, since I hadn't seen him smoke before tonight. It was as if something had changed for him. Maybe my appearance had dug up old ghosts. Or maybe the man was on his way to bury them once and for all.
I shut the door and sat down in the corner of the kitchen, on the one chair that wasn't shattered to bits. This job I had been sent to do was almost over. Or at least I hoped to God it was. I grabbed the envelope Carmelo dropped off and looked at the address. An abandoned house near the water. Had Cade been hiding there the whole time? Was he ever really in Detroit? I didn't know what to believe.
Jobs never lasted this long. It was always easy to find the guy who owed you money or any other kind of debt. But Cade was cunning and that frightened me. I had to question every single move I made when I chased down a guy that smart.
That night I couldn't sleep. I lay awake in my bed with feverish hallucinations. The stress was killing me. Dahlia. She was in danger. If Cade laid one finger on her, I'd kill the bastard. But there was always the chance he'd get me first. Who knew what the bastard was up to? He could have been right outside my window for all I knew. Those thoughts birthed my newest anxieties. All those dark feelings, including the pain in my gut, pointed to one thing: I was in love.
Fuck…
When day broke, my eyes felt tired and heavy. I rolled out of bed and immediately stepped on a piece of glass in the kitchen. “Shit!” Not a good start to my day.
I reached down and pulled the big shard out, barely wincing at the pain. “Son of a bitch,” I muttered. In the bloody reflection of the glass was my face. But I could have sworn someone was standing behind me. Of course, when I turned around, there was nobody there. The woods were eerily quiet. Even the birds seemed to have vanished.
I disinfected my wound and wrapped my foot with a clean bandage. Nothing a little time couldn't fix. I limped to my car and fell onto the front seat. I have to clean this place. I thought to myself. It would be the first thing I would do before I left here, right after I got Cade.
I rubbed my hands together and started the Cadillac. It purred like a kitten. It was time to tell Dahlia all her troubles were about to fade. I drove to the café, which was already empty after the holiday weekend. I walked inside, hearing that familiar bell ring above my head, and saw that beautiful tight ass, Dahlia leaning over in front of me, cleaning the display case for the pastries.
“If only every customer got to experience this incredible view,” I laughed.
She jumped and turned around, blushing. “Shut up,” she said, when she calmed down a little.
“That ass is definitely worth the drive down from Detroit,” I continued. “In fact, it should be featured in that display case in front of all the pasties. You’d probably get more customers in here if it was.”
“What's with the limp?”
“Stepped on some glass. Not a huge deal, but it's an extra hassle I now have to deal with,” I said, leaning against the counter.
“I bet, old man. So what do you want today? Red eye? Iced caramel latte? A 32 ounce frappé?” She laughed. It was at that moment of light heartedness I regretted having to tell her the truth of the situation.
“Just a coffee to go. Large,” I said. She quickly grabbed a to-go cup and poured the dark and steamy liquid inside. “Listen, there's something I need to tell you.”
She raised her eyebrows at me. “Nothing too serious, I hope?”
The coffee tasted bitter and the air turned cold. I was used to being the bearer of bad news. The only difference now was that this was the woman I was falling for. “Some bad. Some good,” I said.
“Spill it,” she said. “I can handle it.” But the look in her eyes said something different. It was fear, plain and simple.
“I've got an address from a reliable source,” I said, looking around. In the back was a young kid, maybe around 25 years old, listening intently to us. I motioned for her to follow me out front. “Let's talk outside.” The kid quickly went back to cooking an egg dish.
“Hey Joel,” she began, “I'm taking my 15.” We both walked out front, feeling the breeze wrap around our bodies, demanding a certain type of warmth from the both of us. We stood close to each other and talked low.
“Look, you're safe here. But you need to make sure Jen is safe too. If you can, pick her up now and pull her out of school. I'm going to find him and end this wild goose chase after all,” I said, feeling the strain of the job pull on me. Kids weren't my favorite, but this kid in particular deserved a good, wholesome life. She deserved happiness and the absen
ce of fear.
She looked worried when she asked “What do you mean? What exactly is going on?”
“I don't know if the information I got earlier in the week was wrong or what, but I've been told Cade has been hiding out in an abandoned building down by the water,” I said, grabbing a cigarette from a pack I had bought in Detroit.
“And you trust your source? What is he doing down by the water? Why is he in Monroe? None of it makes any sense,” she said, turning hysterical.
Here we go… I grunted loudly and grabbed the gun at my hip. “It makes perfect sense. He wants to kill me and take Jen from you. I don't know the guy, but he sounds like a lunatic,” I said.
“He is,” she agreed, taking the cigarette from my hands and taking a drag for herself.
“But that doesn't mean he's an idiot. He knows the quickest way to get to me and my family is through you.” I grabbed my cigarette back, took one more drag, and tossed it.
“Through me? What do you mean?” she asked.
“Because…” I groaned, as if in pain. “He knows I love you.” The words came out quick. Just hearing them spill from my mouth made me sick. Love? A guy like me? What was happening to me? But it was the truth and I wouldn't let myself hide from it any longer. Yes, God dammit. I loved her.
I may have been strong enough to tell her my innermost feelings, but I wasn't about to stick around and listen to what she had to say about them. Her face looked shocked and she began stuttering.
“Nope,” I said. “I'm going.” And before she could protest any further, I was already in my Cadillac, going 60 miles an hour south.
Driving like a maniac, I took out my burner phone and punched in my brother’s number. Even though I disliked the guy, he was known to have my back in tight situations. At the very least I needed to give him a head’s up that I was about to enter an unknown and dangerous situation.
The sun shone directly ahead of me, reflecting off the water and green leaves of the trees. Any time I collected on a debt, I knew it could be the end of my life. However, this was different. This felt more foreign.
