Gentleness washed across his expression as his fingers traveled over the side of her face. “While it’s great to be strong, sometimes it’s okay not to be.”
She gulped, the vision of him growing blurry as tears welled, begging for release.
“I’m here. You’re safe now. It’s okay to cry.” Once again he wrapped her in his arms.
His warmth and strength felt like a safety net, and she knew that if she tumbled he’d catch her. She felt protected. Cherished. Adored. She sensed it all filling her.
Wrapped in his unbreakable hold, Chloe made a promise to herself that the panic Travis had caused her to experience that night would remain forever in the shadows of the abandoned barn, never to follow her back.
Chapter 15
A couple hours later, Sawyer strode into his bedroom. He’d decided to bring Chloe back to his house immediately, to neutralize the memories of being abducted there, and a splash coming from the adjoining bathroom told Sawyer that Chloe was relaxed and enjoying her bath. He grabbed his T-shirt at the base of his neck and pulled the fabric over his head, then removed his socks and lowered himself onto the soft mattress, staring at his toes.
His eyes shut as he inhaled and exhaled slowly, using the techniques he’d learned as a sniper to slow his heart rate.
Only when he sensed someone standing in front of him did he reopen them. There stood Chloe in the glow from the bathroom light. The beautiful angel who’d come into his life under tragic circumstances watched him with uncertain eyes. His fingers longed to hold her close. His heart ached to be near her. “Come here,” he said softly.
Holding the towel wrapped around her, she approached, leaving damp footprints on the hardwood floor. The emotion he saw in her features left him nearly winded.
When she reached him, he ran his fingers down her arm, relishing her shiver. He noted how her pupils dilated and her lips parted. Lost in the moment, he stroked her creamy, smooth flesh over and over.
Christ, I need you, whispered his heart.
Overwhelmed by her, he slid his hands around her back, pulling her onto his lap. Her wet hair hung over her shoulder, and she smelled of vanilla bubble bath. A raw, intense sense of protectiveness rushed through him. “Tonight scared me,” he whispered, caressing her face.
Her eyes fluttered shut. “It scared me, too.”
“I never get scared.” He waited for her eyes to reopen before he continued. “Never, Chloe. I’ve been trained to not be afraid. To always stay calm. But tonight I realized what a fragile thing you are. Now that I have you, I cannot lose you.”
Tears welled in her eyes. “Sawyer…”
“I need you.” Somehow saying it aloud cemented it into his soul. “Goddamn it, I need you as much as I need air to breathe. You’ve changed everything for me. Now that I’ve tasted life with you, I can’t go back. Not ever. Do you understand that?”
One tear slid down her rosy cheek. “Yes, I do.”
He cupped her cheek. “Just before I took the shot tonight, I realized that I’d give up everything in my life if only I could keep you safe.”
“I’m okay.” She kissed his thumb as it brushed across her lips.
“Yes, I know that you are.” He couldn’t let her go. He didn’t want to ever again. “But tonight changed everything, hasn’t it?”
“Changed things how?”
He gazed into the prettiest blue eyes he’d ever seen, which held a soul even more beautiful. “You need to tell me you’re past your ex. You have to tell me that you’re in this completely.”
Her lips parted. But instead of giving him the answer he hoped for, she asked, “You know what I thought about tonight?”
“What?”
“When I became the most scared, I thought about one thing.” She stared at him, no hesitation showing on her face. “I wanted your arms around me, no one else’s. And you know what?”
“Tell me.”
“It made me realize that I want you. I want us to be together.” Another tear trickled down her cheek. “I’m in this completely.”
His smile came instantly. “I’m so damn happy to hear you say that.” Determined to take what now belonged to him, he lowered his hands and nudged her towel open, letting it fall to the ground. Her erect nipples caught his attention, and he played his fingers over one, enjoying the way the bud puckered further.
She arched her back, inviting him to play with her. Her hands came up to his nape, running over his head. Her touch brought heat. It also brought a yearning to consume her. Sex was sex. This, between them, was something different. Something better.
Something special.
Bracing her back with his hands, he took her nipple in between his lips, sucking it. Her soft moans encouraged him. Yet tonight he needed more from her. He craved more than a fuck that would leave them screaming in pleasure. Determined to get all he wanted from her, he kept his arms tight around her and rose, placing her in the middle of his bed.
Sure, he could lick her swollen cunt, stealing the orgasms right out of her body. Of course he could place her on her knees and pound against her until they both released the tension from the night. But that wasn’t what he wanted from Chloe. He wanted her soul.
With her heated eyes watching him, he sealed his mouth over hers, giving her a kiss that spoke of his intention. Slowly, sensually, he used his lips to adore her. He drew in the scents swirling around him, a mix of her arousal and the hints of vanilla. She spread her legs wider while he settled between her thighs.
Captivated by her soft moans, he began rubbing his dick over her hard clit, shifting back and forth until her breath grew raspy. He never stopped kissing her; his hips ground her into the mattress as her hard nipples pressed against his chest.
Only when she began squirming beneath him did he release her mouth and slide his lips down to the warm flesh of her neck. His cock throbbed with the need to be buried inside her; he wanted to mark her tonight, to make her remember this moment forever. These minutes together weren’t about orgasms or making sex intense. They were about a journey two people took to become closer. They were about feeling each other in a way no one else could feel them. About going to a place they hadn’t gone before.
He sucked her earlobe into his mouth. “Are you on the pill?”
“IUD.” She gasped, arching her hips up and rubbing her hot sex against his cock.
He groaned as her slick heat begged him to take her. He shifted his hips, placing the tip of his bare cock against her soaked pussy. Moving back and forth, he pushed the tip inside her folds and then withdrew. Her hips rose in offering, pulling his swollen cock head inside her, but he paused and asked, “I want to feel you bare, Chloe. Is that all right?”
“Yes.” She leaned up to kiss his neck, swirling her tongue over his pulse point. Her hips rose higher, begging him to take her. “I need you. Please.”
His eyes shut as he thrust forward, feeling the warmth only she could offer him. So tight. So wet. So mine.
Perfection had nothing on this.
—
Chloe arched off the bed as far as she could with Sawyer’s heavy weight covering her. Bare skin against bare skin made her reach for more pleasure. Every shift of his hips sent her skyrocketing. Each kiss brought a sensation so beautiful she never wanted to return from its high.
Before, Sawyer had fucked her. Now he brought their souls together, and Chloe nearly wept at the beauty of it. His mouth never left hers, not once. Somehow that simple move spoke to Chloe’s heart. Tonight he didn’t devour her. He took her to a place where passion wasn’t about hard fucking. He brought them to an emotional level she’d never reached before.
God, how protected and adored she felt.
Tingling from the tips of her fingers to her toes, she trailed her hands over hot damp flesh, exploring all his flexing muscles. He wanted her. Lusted for her. And that made her feel special. Desired.
She opened her eyes to see him practically dancing on her sensually with his rhythmic thrust
s, his head lifted. She cupped his cheeks as his mouth stayed right there by hers. His labored breaths brushed across her skin, and she inhaled each one, embracing his citrusy aroma, meeting him thrust for thrust. Lost in his shadowy eyes, she saw something there she’d never seen before. Vulnerability. Hunger. An expression so intense she knew she’d never forget this moment.
He bared his soul to let her in, and she drowned in him.
Nothing lay between them now. All of what he felt she experienced in each slow stroke and in the way he watched her from under hooded eyelids. Appreciation. Fevered passion. Pure respect. Chloe tumbled in all he gave her now, mirroring the emotions he released on her body. Her heart reached for his, and he encased it, weaving himself around her in his safety.
Her toes clenched and pleasure washed across her as he shifted, moving in and out faster. She angled her hips, needing more, as he shoved his hand beneath her bottom, lifting her to him.
“Deeper?” he murmured.
“Yes.” She gripped his forearms, digging her nails into him. “God, yes!”
His masculine groans sent a shiver down her spine as he began pumping into her. Undeniably turned on, she scraped her nails along his back before sliding them down to his ass, gripping the firm muscle there, begging him to thrust harder.
Skin against skin, every thrust felt better than the one before it. Her moans became a single sound of pleasure as pressure built in her womb. His thick cock slid in and out, moving so fast through the silkiness of her arousal.
The musky scent of sex rushed through her nostrils as he returned his mouth to hers. Lost in his kiss, Chloe knew nothing but the feel of his hard body moving inside and against hers. The strength he possessed, the confidence, and his hard planes against her soft curves—all of it was perfection.
She gripped his tight ass, not allowing him to move away, keeping him nice and close. Beneath her hands, his muscles tensed and a low groan slipped from his lips. She watched his eyes widen and felt his cock growing inside her. Without any sense of warning, almost as if her body had twined with his, his pleasure brought hers. His hard cock, quick and urgent, demanded she soar over the edge with him. The sensation hit her so fast and with such intensity that she couldn’t refuse even if she wanted to.
In the whirlwind of satisfaction, she soon only knew the weight of his exhausted body against hers and the sound of his rough breathing in her ear. They lay like that for many minutes until a low groan slipped from Sawyer’s mouth as he lifted himself off her. She reached up and cupped his cheeks, feeling the damp sweat gathered on his face.
Without a word, he kissed her—a sweet kiss that ended the most sexually satisfying experience of her life. Not because of its intensity, but because Chloe now understood what it meant to have sex with someone where passion lived.
When he broke away, she mourned both his mouth and his cock as he withdrew from her. He grunted, sliding onto his side. As she turned to face him, a welcome wet stickiness coated her inner thighs. Even if his body was no longer inside hers, he still remained in her, and she liked that.
A comfortable silence settled between them as Sawyer searched her eyes. At last he stroked her cheek. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
She smiled at him. “I’m thinking that I’m really glad I decided to stop thinking with my head and followed my heart.”
His eyes softened, becoming even gentler. “Because it led you to me?”
She leaned into his touch, loving how a tough guy possessed such tender hands. “Because it led me to you.” This never would’ve happened with Sawyer if she hadn’t just gone for it. Pride filled her. She’d taken a dive into the unknown and had come out better for it. “So…you’ve shown me what it’s like to fuck and what it’s like to make love with mind-blowing passion. Got anything else to show me?”
His chuckle sent warmth in her veins. “Don’t dare me, Chloe. You might not like what I’d do to you.”
“Ooh.” She moved closer to him, wiggling a little bit. “That sounds like an invitation.”
He grabbed her leg, hooking it over his hip before smacking her bottom. “Who says I need an invitation?”
The glint in his eye declared he meant what he said. “Well, what would you do to me?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” He kissed her nose.
Narrowing her eyes at the playfulness in his, she grumbled, “Yes, I would, and that’s why I’m asking.”
His sly grin was his only response.
She pressed her lips together, thinking this conversation needed to happen. Besides, some of the kink did interest her. Sawyer had taken her to places she’d never gone before. Where else could he take her?
While she regarded him, he remained silent, simply watching her with amusement and running his finger along her hip. Eventually Chloe realized he wasn’t drawing a random design on her skin. She concentrated on his fingers.
He chuckled. “Your brows are drawn together and you’re nibbling your lip. You’re wondering what I’m writing, aren’t you?”
“Yes.” She nodded. “What word is that?”
“Sometime I’ll tell you.” He grinned.
She lifted her head off the pillow to gaze at him. “But not now?”
“No, Chloe.” He gathered her in his arms. When he murmured “Not now” into her neck, she cared more about the warmth of his body than the single word on his mind.
Chapter 16
One week later, sitting atop a wooden stool in the sports bar Mickey’s, Sawyer sipped the crisp beer, scanning the faces of the Club Sin Masters around him. Travis was in jail and Chloe and Ashlyn weren’t in danger any longer, but still, strain threaded through Sawyer.
Chloe had gone back to work today after taking the week off. During that time she and Sawyer had taken a few day trips. One to the Grand Canyon. Another to a lake resort. He had a shift tomorrow morning and looked forward to returning to work. Life should’ve felt like it was getting back to normal. Yet it didn’t. Everything seemed different. He felt different. Which seemed odd to him, considering he was now surrounded by all of his closest friends, the Club Sin Masters. These men had been a solid presence in his life for at least five years, some of them even longer; he should only feel comfort around them.
So then why didn’t he?
Taking in the busy atmosphere of the pub, he gulped down his beer, feeling the cool liquid sliding down his throat. The football game played on the monitors. Loud laughter and chatter spun around him. Sawyer stayed lost in his head. Chloe had texted him earlier, telling him that Kenzie had invited her out tonight. Sawyer had suspicions about that. Now he looked up to address the men around him. “Whose idea was it to have the girls contact Chloe?”
Porter smiled from behind his beer. “Mine, of course.”
Sawyer spun his beer bottle. “What was your intention?”
Kyler answered for him. “Our intention was to introduce our girls to yours.”
Sawyer smiled in gratitude. He liked that part of it. “Well, thank you. I’m sure she appreciates having a girls’ night out.”
“As far as I’m aware, they’re just at Kenzie’s apartment,” said Porter. “Girls’ night in, I heard.” Surprise fluttered across his face when he saw Sawyer’s expression. “Did you not know that?”
Chloe hadn’t told him the exact details of tonight, only that Kenzie had invited her. “No, she never said exactly what they’d be doing.”
Dmitri’s eyes widened. “She didn’t tell you what they were doing?”
Sawyer shook his head, laughing to himself over the shock in their faces. “Nope.”
“Doesn’t that upset you?” asked Aidan.
Sawyer thought perhaps it should. Yet at the same time it almost freed him that she did the exact opposite of what a submissive would do. She didn’t feel it necessary to tell him all the details, as would be expected if he were dating a submissive. She’d drawn a line, and he rather liked it—the line would keep him well aware of when he should act Dominant
and when he should not. “Nope, not upset at all.”
Kyler snorted. “That’s because she’s knocked you on your ass.”
Sawyer shrugged, not denying it.
“Tell us, how is Chloe doing after her ordeal?” asked Dmitri in a more serious voice.
Before Sawyer could reply, two waitresses brought over trays of chicken wings and burgers. They handed out the meals and took more drink orders, then scurried off. Sawyer picked up a hot wing. “She’s a trouper, that girl.”
“I still can’t believe that happened to her,” Kyler said before taking a bite of his burger. “She’s brave.”
“She is that.” Sawyer wiped his mouth with his napkin. “She had a good cry, got it out, and picked herself right back up again.”
Porter chewed on a wing. “She’s always been that way. It’s why she’s so good at her job. Nothing fazes her. She accepts what’s happening around her as something she can’t control and moves on.”
Sawyer smiled. “She is special.” Which reminded him that he hadn’t asked his friends here tonight just to shoot the shit. He’d been away from Club Sin since Chloe’s abduction, only wanting to be with her, and he needed to answer for that. He couldn’t stay in this limbo any longer. “Which brings me to the reason I asked you all here.” All eyes turned to him. He drew in a deep breath, steadying himself for what he needed to do next. “Something’s gotta give.”
Kyler frowned behind his burger. “With what?”
“When Chloe was in danger”—Sawyer pushed away his plate for now, his appetite gone—“it made me realize things. Things that I can’t ignore any longer if I want to move forward.” He read concern on all the faces around him. “Every time the BDSM lifestyle comes up with Chloe, something goes to shit. First it was when she went to Chains and became upset because she thought she couldn’t be what I needed. Then I went to talk to Porter, and Travis abducted her. That’s telling me I can’t have both lives.” He paused, and suddenly all the tension he’d been feeling left him as he said, “I pick her.”
Aidan lowered his beer bottle to the table with a clunk. “What do you mean, you pick her?”
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