by T. S. Joyce
His cheek twitched once and his eyes grew cold and empty once more. “Then you and your new people will die for your love.”
Chapter One
Anya Bure checked the mouth of the main road for the hundredth time in an hour. Nathan was due back anytime, and anticipation of hearing about his trip to visit Joanna had her clawing ruthlessly at the weeds in the gardens of the Long Claw Clan.
Two acres had been fenced in and the vegetables inside resembled a jungle with their towering plants. Most days she hated working at the gardens. Nathan had given her the chore when she’d begged for a job to ease the boredom of waiting for him to need something from her. Instead of allowing her to clear pipes up in the mountain rivers for water power like she had requested, he let her pick weeds near his house. Today she was thankful for the assignment because from here, she had a great view of the road.
The churning of her emotions threatened to overwhelm her as she thought about Joanna. He’d gone into enemy territory alone just for the chance to see her again. Nathan didn’t know how to love, but if he did, Joanna would have his heart. A pang of jealousy stabbed through her and she wrapped her hands around a giant weed and yanked it from the earth.
Jealousy was a stupid emotion. That’s what she’d been taught since she was little. She was first mate of the alpha. Why couldn’t she just be happy with that?
Because of the others.
She straightened, stretching her aching back, and wiped perspiration from her forehead. She didn’t get jealous over his other mates, Greta and April, and she couldn’t figure out why. He was less tender with them perhaps, or didn’t seem to care as much. They were a business arrangement, and that important business was to bear him cubs someday. But then Joanna had unintentionally turned his head.
Anya didn’t even hate the woman. On the contrary, Joanna had been the closest person to a friend she’d had in a long time. She admired the woman for her strength to say no to Nathan where Anya had failed. Joanna had stayed aloof, even though Nathan pursued her with single-minded ambition.
Anya had fallen immediately for his promises and cunning bedroom manner. Weak.
It was all about sex with him. Perhaps she had mistaken that for love, but Joanna said things she couldn’t get out of her mind now. The woman had started an irreparable change in Anya, then left her to sort them out on her own. Now, she didn’t know if she could ever be happy with this life again.
A motor sounded from far off, and she threw a silent thank you into the sky for her superior shifter hearing. Tidying her hair, she strode out of the gardens to get a better view of her mate’s arrival. Her mate? Why did that word leave a metallic taste in her mouth now? She’d never had trouble keeping up the farce before. Shaking her head, she tried to clear the unsettling thought. Nathan would know if she wasn’t in the right frame of mind to receive him.
Greta and April stepped up beside her. Greta twirled a blonde ringlet around her finger as if she were trying to perfect her already gorgeous locks, and April was smothering her lips in red lip gloss. Merit, the woman who would likely be Nathan’s fourth mate, used that color. She got most of his attention these days, and April had started dressing like her. Anya felt bad for April’s insecurity. Pride had been the cost of their relationships with Nathan.
“Who do you think he’ll ask for first?” Merit wondered from behind. She stood leaned against the rough wooden fence that deterred bears from trampling their food supply. Her voice always sounded cruel, even if she seemed happy, and today was no different.
“Probably you,” Greta said, sounding defeated. Merit bullied her the most.
“Good girl,” Merit purred.
Anya felt like she was losing herself completely, and the first tendrils of bitterness curled around her chest cavity. She’d been his first mate, and at the time he’d chosen her, she’d thought she would be his only one. With each addition to his harem, her heart broke a little more. Now, she didn’t feel much of anything anymore. Duty to her clan to continue Nathan’s line trumped all. What an empty existence.
A black SUV appeared at the edge of the woods and bounced forward until it came to a stop fifty yards from them. Other members of the clan were gathering to greet their returned leader. Even with the strife Joanna’s escape and the battle with Bear Valley had caused, he was still beloved by most. The rest wanted him stripped of alpha, but Nathan was too strong. He was much too cruel now to be bullied from his rank. He would kill anyone who crossed him.
Would he kill me if he found me inadequate? The thought was an unwelcome fog that chilled her blood. She couldn’t be sure anymore. The loss of Joanna had done something awful to him. No, it was more than that. He’d been growing darker for the past year. Losing Joanna had only irritated whatever festering wound he was harboring in his mind.
He stepped from the driver’s side of the SUV with a hard look about his features. No one could deny that he was an alluring and well sculpted man. That used to mean a lot to her when he’d first shown interest. He had fair blond hair and rippling muscle that covered his body. His sky blue eye color had been beautiful once, but now it was cold as ice. He didn’t look at her much anymore, and she swallowed hard as his gaze danced over her and landed on Merit.
Figured. Crossing her arms against a sudden chill on the breeze, she turned to go back to work.
“Anya,” Nathan said over the murmured welcomes of his clan.
She paused and turned, waited.
“You’ll go to my room and wait for me there,” he said in a deep, authoritative voice.
“Are you fucking serious?” Merit sounded completely offended.
He ghosted the vile woman behind her a hard look, then turned back to his new second-in-command, Brooks. Sometimes Anya thought Brooks, with his thoughtful gaze and quiet patience, would make a much better alpha than Nathan. He’d lost the last alpha challenge though, so that was that. The Long Claws were stuck with blood-thirsty, stubborn, domineering Nathan.
He didn’t check to see if she was obeying orders. She’d never disobeyed, though she wanted to more and more just to feel stronger. Her parent’s voices filled her head on those occasions. Anya, you’ll be mate of the greatest alpha. It will be the most important thing about you now. You must always make him happy, or you’ll bring shame on our family.
If they were still alive now to see her growing unhappiness, would they care? Both had been born and raised Long Claws. Mating for love was a foreign concept to her clan. Maybe that’s why she’d mistaken the potency of her feelings. She hadn’t an example of real love to compare it to.
She crossed he arms like a shield across her chest, and cast one more lingering glance at Nathan before she turned away. His house was in the back of the clan, behind a row of kit homes that had been built when the Long Claws won the land from the Kodiaks in a bloody battle. Her sneakers made scuffling sounds against the pavestone walkway, and she slipped through the door into the cool draft of the air conditioning.
A sprawling living room and kitchen took up most of the first floor, but the second floor was where he meant for her to go. Her stomach clenched and filled with warmth just looking at the room atop the stairs. She’d had so much pleasure in this room with him, it was as if her body prepared itself for ecstasy despite the turmoil in her mind. No, Nathan didn’t know how to love, but he took care of her physical needs in a way she imagined no other man could. That had to count for something, right?
Knowing what was expected of her, she unhurriedly peeled off her shirt and unfastened her bra. Her breasts bobbed free of their restraint and she sighed in relief. The fabric of her jeans brushed her smooth legs as she pulled them down, and when she was completely naked, she turned to a full-length mirror. The rich red and gold of the curtains and fabric of the room blurred away. No incense was lit yet, but the smell still clung to the room. Nathan had a bias against hair, and required she keep herself waxed completely smooth. He didn’t use her as much anymore, but she kept up the grooming habit just
in case.
Use? What a strange word to apply to what he did with her. She enjoyed sex with him too. But something was changing inside of her. She frowned at her reflection. Was sex enough to satisfy her for the entirety of her life?
It has to be, the shade of her mother whispered.
She took a deep breath and expelled it from her lungs. Draping her hands on her slim hips, she turned from side to side. She was twenty-five but looked much younger with the lack of hair on her lady parts. Or maybe it was her face. Eyes too wide and innocent looking, nose too petite. She even had freckles across her cheeks, though Nathan preferred she cover them with make-up, which she did. Today, she must’ve wiped the foundation from her cheeks as she worked the gardens in the relentless sunlight.
“You’re beautiful,” Nathan said in a low voice from the top of the stairway. She searched his reflected face in the mirror but he was serious and calm as he admired her backside. “Get on my bed.”
His command sent a thrill through her. She’d always been attracted to dominant males who knew what they wanted.
“On your knees,” he said, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. His hooded eyes followed her journey to the bed, and a wicked smile crooked his lips as she settled onto her knees on top of the plush, king-sized mattress.
He pulled off his shirt and shucked his jeans, then took himself in hand and pulled a long stroke against his erection. “Now, touch yourself.”
Spreading her knees wider, she trailed her fingertips down her stomach and cupped her sex. With a deep, teasing breath, she slid her finger inside of her and arched her neck back. His breath hitched as she eased out and pressed in again.
A minute passed and still, he didn’t touch her. She was going to come soon and he usually didn’t like her finishing without him, but he wasn’t stopping her either. She closed her eyes and moaned as her hands shook against their duty.
“Stop,” he said, just as she was about to tip over the edge.
She froze, irritated that she was so close and controlled by his frivolous wants. Stalking to the bed, his approach was slow and deliberate, like a predator on the hunt. His shaft looked stone hard and an angry red. She drew her gaze up his body to the scars Joanna’s new mate had inflicted during battle.
“Don’t look at that,” he demanded in a harsh voice.
Sliding out of herself, she averted her gaze. His long fingers were painful as he jerked her chin to meet his eyes.
“What’s wrong with you today?” he asked low.
“Nothing.” She bit her tongue against the urge to walk out.
“You know better than to look at the scars, yet here you are, defying my orders.”
“I don’t remember there being orders in our bedroom before this,” she observed boldly. Her cheeks heated, and she bit her bottom lip as anger bloomed in his face.
“Our bedroom, Anya? No, love. This is my bedroom, and you’ll do best to remember that. Turn around. Get on your hands and knees.”
She frowned but did as she was told. He knew she didn’t like it from behind. He was never careful with the angle of his shaft, and he was too rough. She could never come like this. Apparently he wasn’t concerned with that anymore. His strong hands grasped her backside and her back flexed instinctively.
“No more defiance, mate,” he growled, then thrust into her, hard.
She gasped at the unexpected pain that warred with pleasure and clenched the bed sheets in her fists as he pounded into her again and again. His pace was too fast, frantic almost, and she screwed up her face to still the urge to plead with him to slow down. She grunted at the discomfort, but he was almost finished. Wildly, he bucked against her until the sound of his flesh slapping hers filled the room like rhythmic drumming.
“Joanna,” he whispered.
Offended, Anya cast a glance over her shoulder, and he was staring with such intensity at the bench seat he’d made Joanna sit on more than a month ago. He had spilled into Anya then while staring at Joanna’s naked body, and he was doing it again without the woman even being here. Asshole.
She lurched forward to escape him, angry that he’d disrespect her so epically, but he gripped her hips and slammed against her one last time, freezing in place as he shot warm wetness into her.
She felt empty. Like a hollow vessel for him to fill at his whim. Her heart broke a little more.
Pulling out of her, he pushed her forward and she landed with an oof on her stomach. He curled around her like he usually did, but it lacked affection this time. He didn’t feel much for her either. Or if he did, he was still angry about her defying him, and her punishment was aloofness.
It had been like this since Merit had come to the Long Claws. “I hate Merit.”
“Are you jealous, love?” he asked against her hair.
Love. There was that word again. “Do you love me?” she asked. She’d never wondered it out loud to him before.
“Do you love me?” he countered. It wasn’t lost on her that he avoided answering. His evasive tactics were answer enough.
“Yes.” At least, she thought she did before Joanna. Maybe he wouldn’t hear the lie in her voice. Or perhaps he wouldn’t care.
“Merit will be around for a long time. Best you get used to her, Anya.”
Minutes drifted by and she thought he would fall asleep as he often did after pumping his seed into a woman. His voice surprised her when he said, “I chose you today because I need to talk to you about something. I have a job for you, one where you could serve me and the Long Claws in an honorable way.”
“A job?” Her heart quickened with the possibility of leaving the gardens. Maybe he’d changed his mind about letting her do pipe work. Then she would be able to travel the mountains with a pipe crew. She’d escape life here for a few hours a day, and relieve the stifling fog that had taken over her life lately.
“I need Joanna back.”
Frowning at the unexpected turn in their conversation, she asked, “Did Joanna agree to come back home?”
“Doesn’t matter. Her mate has to die for what he did to me. I’d planned to finish him at the meeting with Joanna, but Riker accompanied her instead. That coward, Brody, never even bothered to show up.”
Okay. She was confused. Joanna had left with this man, Brody, on purpose, and she didn’t seem the type to come running back to Nathan. If he killed her mate, how would that get Nathan what he wanted? “Does she love him?”
“What is with your obsession with love today? Don’t mention the word to me again or I’ll punish you.” His voice was quiet and dangerous, and she swallowed hard.
“I won’t mention it again,” she promised. “The job?”
“You’re leaving here, Anya, for a month at least.”
Dread slammed into her and her heart drummed against her sternum. Leave here? This was home, the only one she had ever known. She wasn’t equipped for the outside world and even if she was, she’d heard horrible stories about bear shifters on the outskirts of clans. Such a doomed feeling washed over her, she sat straight up and turned to see if he was serious, handling her fate so carelessly. “Why? Where will I go?” The panic in her voice wasn’t pretty, but hang it all. Her mate was throwing her away.
“You and Joanna bonded, and she’ll be your ticket into Bear Valley.”
“Bear Valley?” she whispered, horrified. Nathan had told her awful things about the shifters there. They beat their mates, took them as they pleased. She was first mate to the alpha of the Long Claw Clan. She was respected here. There, she’d be used or brutalized, or worse. “You can’t mean it, Nathan.”
He propped up on his elbow and his eyes were hard and cold, like shards of glass. “I won’t keep a mate who is useless to me. We’ve been paired for two years, and still you haven’t given me a cub. What use is a sterile mate to a man in my position? Because I care for you, I’m giving you a chance to prove your worth to me. If you succeed, I will consider keeping you.”
Consider keeping—he’d lo
st his damned mind! A pairing didn’t work like that. Did it? He’d told the clan she was his mate, wasn’t that all she needed to keep her place here?
Until you’re of no use to me…She’d heard him say something similar the night he’d tried to announce his mating to Joanna. Was that how it worked with him? Mates were expendable? Interchangeable and unimportant, to be switched out as needed?
“Greta and April haven’t given you cubs either. Why not one of them?” she asked in desperation.
“You have a full year on them, Anya. You haven’t even gone into heat in the last year and a half. Spy on Bear Valley, get me the ammunition I need to drag that traitorous clan through fields of its own blood, and you’ll remain mated to me.”
“I can’t do this,” she whispered as a tear slipped down her cheek.
“You will, or I’ll kill you, Anya.” The way he said it was so nonchalant, like he was telling her what kind of tea he liked.
“You can’t mean this, Nathan.” The sting of his betrayal was too much. Her chest felt like some great weight had sat upon her. She couldn’t draw a breath.
His eyes narrowed to angry slits. “I can, and I do.”
Chapter Two
“Again,” Chase Hale called after two snarling black bears separated from a vicious volley of slaps.
“You don’t think they’ve got this?” Brody asked. He sat at the edge of the wooden table he’d dragged out to the training arena, and kicked at a stone with the toe of his boot.
Chase shook his head. Brody was losing his edge. Joanna was softening him somehow. It was a sad thing to happen to a dominant fighter like Brody, but his friend didn’t seem to see the problem with it.
“Do you? You trust Joanna to be ready if you go easy on her?”
Brody watched his mate fight with stormy eyes. “You’re right.”
Riker, Bear Valley’s alpha, leaned his chin onto his arms over the fence. “If Nathan is going to attack, he sure is taking his sweet-ass time about it.”
