by Ciarra
“How you doing baby? They told me you were getting discharged so I bought you a V.S. suit. You coming back with me to the hotel?” he asked all in one breath while setting the clothes on the bed.
“Thanks baby,” I said to him and kissed him on the cheek. I was grateful for the clothes because I really didn’t have anything except the clothes the hospital donated to me. I walked into the bathroom, changed and looked in the mirror. I was still skeptic about Bee. It was like he was determined to keep me in his life. All I could think about was Dayja. I know I had to be cool with him to figure out where she was, and if he was involved or not. If that means I have to be a snake, I most definitely will.
After getting dressed, I walked out of the room. Once the doctor gave me my discharger papers, we were out the door. I walked outside and was happy to breathe fresh air. Bee was walking ahead of me but I stopped following his ass; I needed some time to myself. Once he realized I was no longer following behind him, he was all the way across the street.
“Where you going?” he yelled at me from across the street.
“I’m catching a cab to my house; I need some time to myself.” I looked around for a cab and waved my hand out. It was time for me to grow up, become a real woman and be Brooklyn. A cab pulled up in front of me and I got in. I gave the driver my address and leaned back in the seat, letting my thoughts take over.
As soon as the cab turned down my street, my stomach turned and I began feeling the butterflies. The money screen told me I owed $26.86. I reached around for my purse and realized I didn’t have it on me this whole time. I looked at the cab driver he was a Somalian man and he was singing to the music on the radio and thought about taking a running for it, but I knew I couldn’t.
“Umm sir, I do apologize, but I just got out of the hospital after being kidnapped, raped and beaten. I just realized I don’t have my purse but I have a nice diamond-cut ring in my house that I am willing to give to you as an even exchange,” I looked at him and said. He looked at me and his face instantly turned red. I was not trying to run off. I lived here. I showed him my hospital papers and also showed him my discharged papers.
“Okay sister, I want diamond ring or I call the police,” he told me. I nodded my head and thanked him. I ran into my house and instantly felt chills. I walked into my room, retrieved the prettiest, biggest ring I had, and ran back out and gave it to the cab driver. He accepted it and pulled off. I turned away and walked back into my house. I haven’t been to my house, since a few weeks after Lovely was killed. It felt awkward being back in the house. It felt cold. I made a mental note to start house searching as soon as possible. I walked in my room and laid down on my bed. I needed a nap. My life was about to be hectic for a few days.
Jay
“Where you going?” Tiffany asked me as I got up, walked into the bathroom and pulled the t-shirt over my head. I looked at Tiffany and shrugged up my face. I was trying to figure out why she was concerned with my doings. I stared at her for an extra moment and examined her. Tiffany was light skinned, more on the white side though. She didn’t have an ass, but her breasts and beauty made up for it. She was very beautiful and had a smile that will make a nigga cheat on his wife. One thing I loved about her was her hair, it was naturally curly. I chuckled to myself and continued to get dressed.
“Oh, so you just gone ignore me, huh,” she said as she walked into the bathroom where I was. I looked at her and kissed her on the forehead.
“I got to go find my sister my baby,” I replied. I smacked her on the butt and walked out the bathroom. No words needed to be spoken; she understood the relationship I had with my sister and she knew if she questioned it, I was kicking her out the door. I walked in my closet, grabbed my nine and made sure she was locked and loaded. I walked back to Tiffany and kissed her on the lips before walking out the door.
My town home in Brooklyn Center had a two-car garage. I only had two cars. I wasn’t a flashy ass nigga but I definitely had some flash to me. I pulled my black-on-black Audi A4 out the garage, hit the gas and put my feet to the pedal. I needed some answers today.
I cruised the city of Minneapolis looking for this nigga Killa, or his two roll dawgs, Slim and Loco. I knew I should have shot that nigga in the head when we robbed him. I was so thirsty and greedy for the money and drugs that I slipped up, and now my sister had to pay the price. I drove all over Minnesota through every city: Brooklyn park, Brooklyn Center, Minneapolis, Uptown, St. Louis park, St. Paul, the east and west side of St. Paul and I even drove through Maplewood. I eventually gave up and found myself pulling up to Brooklyn’s place that she and Lovely used to share. It was eight at night and I was just hoping Brook was here instead of lying up with that nigga who believed that she was carrying his baby. I knew it was a possibility she was carrying my kid.
KNOCK KNOCK!
I stood back and prayed she was here. I saw a light come on and then I heard the locks on the door jiggle. She opened up the door and stood to the side to let me in. “Why you didn’t ask who it was?” I asked her.
“Because I looked out the window and saw your car,” she said to me. I took off my shoes and brushed past her. I walked my ass to her room, took off my shoes and climbed in her bed. She walked in a few minutes later and found me staring at the ceiling. “Man we got to find Dayja,” I looked at Brook and said. She shook her head and up down, and tears started coming out her eyes.
“I know, I know, I’ve just been trying to remember where they took us,” Brook said. I pulled her down on the bed with me and kissed her lips. I scooted down and also kissed her stomach. As soon as I did that, she looked at me and smiled. “Don’t be kissing my daughter,” she said.
“Probably my daughter you mean.” She looked down and rolled her eyes. “Don’t do that. I know that’s probably my baby. I’ve been sick as hell since I found out so get ready,” I told her. She huffed and puffed and then spoke.
“But let’s be serious. What if it is your baby, Jay? I know you would like a baby but lets be forreal what the hell we going to do with a baby.” I looked at her then rolled over. She was facing my back and I was facing a blank wall.
“Man, just be cool,” I told her. I didn’t have anything to else to say about the situation. I knew I wasn’t ready for a baby but maybe this baby came at the perfect time. Maybe I needed this baby to cool me down. I felt Brook eventually lay down. I turned around and wrapped my arms around her and spooned her. Even though I knew I wasn’t supposed supposed to be here, I felt a peace of mind laying next to Brooklyn.
Brook
I woke up the next morning and noticed Jay was already gone and not lying next to me. I just shrugged it off and continued to get ready. First thing first was going to get a cell phone. I feel so empty inside without one. I walked into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. There was still no sign of Dayja. Even thought this was a sad situation, it was still slowly but surely becoming a happy thing for me. I was going to be in the spotlight. I would be the one making money now. All the devilish thoughts came to my mind but what more could I say. I no longer had someone to tell me what to do. It was like the throne just got tossed to me and I had no choice but to catch it. I didn’t want to move too fast because I didn’t want Jay to think I was trying to take over his sister’s business, but the money still had to keep flowing and a job just wasn’t going to cut it. I just had to think of a plan to get Jay out the picture. I didn’t want to kill his ass but if Dayja never shows up or if she is dead, I know I will eventually have to kill him and then that way, I wouldn’t have to split anything with anybody. I shook my head and chuckled. I turned around and looked at my body. I don’t know if I was ready for a baby, but this baby could be my ticket out the ghetto. If either Jay or Bee played the father role to my child, I know we both were going to be taken care of. But the question was if I was ready to take care of someone else. I’m not really ready to change diapers and have a little person following behind me. I was confused and my head was all over the
place. Did I want to forget about Dayja and just start playing her role or did I want to use a baby and sit back and relax? I was really sitting here on my toilet debating. I was all types of fucked up. I turned on the shower and hopped inside. I had to get these thoughts out of my head ASAP.
Killa
“So what you gone do Killa? Are you going to pop this bitch or is you going to continue to stare at the bitch and plan your future out with the snake?” Loco asked me while laughing. I had to admit I had a soft spot for Dayja. I don’t know why because she was supposed to be dead on sight.
“Nigga, shut up, I can’t help I got feelings for the bitch,” I looked at Loco and said. We were sitting in the basement of my house in Hudson, Wisconsin. Dayja was tied up in the bed knocked out.
“Man Killa, you got shot in your legs twice and left for dead because of the bitch. She stole everything you worked so hard for and you’re really thinking about this bitch?” Loco looked at me and said while shaking his head.
Loco was my nigga. We’ve been cool since middle school. His real name was Breon but everybody called him Loco because he was a lunatic ass nigga. He didn’t have a care in the world. He would shoot you in the grocery store if he really wanted to. He was crazy as fuck but his ass was always behind me when it was time to handle our business. We were sitting here, laughing and drinking yak when my other brother, Slim called me to tell me he was outside. I walked to the door and let Slim in. He came through the door with another bottle of Hennessy in his hand.
“Man, what’s up, you still got the bitch in here sitting pretty?” Slim asked me. Loco instantly burst out laughing. Slim and I also grew up together, meeting as early as preschool. He was my A-1 since day one. Slim whose real name was Shamir, was the brains out of the three of us. He was the only one who thought smart and he was the real reason Dayja was still alive. Of course, Slim told me I was the reason I had got robbed and left for dead and he was somewhat telling the truth. I was head over hills for a piece of pussy and ended up slipping. A real sucker move! I did want to kill Dayja but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Why, because it my fault that it happened. Rule number one was to never let a female that you’re just fucking all into your business, and that’s what I did. I couldn’t really fault for her that.
“Aye man, let the bitch go and let’s go about our business. If she snitches or has somebody come after you, then we will handle it, but until then, you have to be grown about the situation. What’s right is right and what’s wrong is wrong; never let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,” Slim said to me. I stroked my beard and shook my head up and down. I stood up and walked up the stairs to the room, and my boys followed behind me. Dayja had tape across her mouth and tape across her eyes. I looked behind at Loco and shook my head. Only this nigga would tape somebody’s eyes closed. I heard Slim chuckle behind me and I know he was laughing at Loco. Poor ole Dayja. I walked closer and instantly got mad, ripping the tape off her eyes. She jumped, looked around the room and her eyes landed on me. For the first time I could actually tell she was scared.
“You know I wanted to kill you right?” I told her. She could only nod her head because she still had tape on her mouth. “But I’m going to let you go because it was really my mistake and I would be a weak man if I blamed you for it.” I spoke in a rough tone so she could understand I was not to be played with. I kissed her on the forehead and whispered in her ear, “But if you send somebody after me I will kill your whole fucking family, even your brother in jail. You understand?” I took the tape off her mouth. “You understand me Dayja?” I asked her again.
“Yes, and I’m really sorry, it was the greed that got to me,” she told me, her voice hoarse. I told Loco to get her bottle of water. He left and returned a few moments later. She drank it and I told her it was time to go. I walked her to the door and reassured her I wasn’t going to come back and kill her, and she reassured me also I didn’t have anything to worry about. She looked back and told me she did love me and have feelings for me, but the way her lifestyle was set up, it came in-between us.
She walked down the path of the sidewalk and I went and met my boys downstairs. I turned to my surveillance camera and noticed her walking down the driveway. I reverted my attention to my brothers. “You think we need to put security on her?” Loco asked.
“Nah, she ain’t crazy,” I told him.
“Whelp, glad that’s over, now it’s time to party. Welcome home my nigga,” Slim said. He gulped out the bottle of Hennessy and passed it me. I took a gulp while Loco started telling us about his hoes. I leaned back and chilled with my niggas. Welcome home to me. It was like I never left.
I woke up the next afternoon and took a nice hot shower. I walked around my house praying, thanking God for giving me the opportunity at life again. I was shot in my legs and grazed behind my ear. The doctor told me that I wasn’t going to be able to walk again at all, but Slim had my back and paid for me to get therapy. He had gotten me a personal physical trainer. Slim and Loco stayed by my side and even stopped hustling and money making, to make sure I was getting the type of things I needed to get back to the turf. I walked around my house and knew it was time for me to get another one. This house contained so many memories that I didn’t want to see or feel anymore. I did let Dayja go but I still felt like this house wasn’t safe and I felt somewhat violated. I got dressed and threw on some Rock Revival jeans. I walked past my mirror and had to stop and stare at myself. I am a very handsome, dark-skinned ass nigga. I kept my hair, cut in a fade and stayed sitting my ass in a barber chair. I had a little mustache and a beard starting to grow. It took me a long time to get use to but it made me feel older and mature. My fade was doing a straight 360 and I was getting seasick from looking at the waves. I was going to wear a t-shirt but fuck it. I wanted to show off all my muscles today.
I decided to give my cars away because I wanted a new beginning when I came back from treatment. Loco left me with his car, a black 2014 Chrysler 200 sitting on 28s. It was sitting and looking real nice. I was considering getting me one next. I put my phone on Pandora’s top R & B hits station, and cruised the highway to Minneapolis. It was an hour out but the streets in the city were most definitely calling my name. I felt the phone stop playing the music, which meant a call was coming in.
“What’s up?” I answered the phone.
“Where you at you black gorilla?” Loco screamed in the phone and said.
“Man, I’m just getting on the highway right now so give me an hour bitch,” I replied.
“Aye nigga, you in my car and this hoe over here tripping and Slim’s ugly ass is not picking up his phone.”
I laughed on the phone with Loco. He had so many females and he addressed them all by ‘hoe’. Loco had no remorse when it came to women. He was the true definition of a ‘suck, fuck and pass them to next nigga’ type of nigga. But he stayed strapped with the plastic. Loco made it known to me plenty of times that he didn’t want kids at all.
“Aight, aight,” I told him and disconnected the call. I put his 200 on cruise control and hit the gas. I took my phone out my pocket and switched the Pandora off to play Jeezy’s Thug Motivation 101, a real hustler’s album. This album was going to get my mind together before I get to the city.
Dayja
I walked down the steps away from Killa’s house and let out my breath. I thought I was dead… I thought Killa was going to kill me. He spared my life when we both knew he wanted to kill me. Killa had really changed or really blamed himself for what happened, because he let me go. I walked down his street really thanking God, because I know if it wasn’t for him sparing my life, I wouldn’t be here. When Killa pulled the trigger, he grazed my ear but when he did that, I instantly passed out. One thing for sure, Killa’s friends definitely had his back and was riding for him. To know that they let me go too, was also a blessing. If circumstances were reversed, I know I would have killed anybody and everybody who was in on the lick. I was walking down the street and tri
ed to think about how the hell I was going to get back to the city. Hudson was an hour out from the city but that was just standpoint. It would take six hours hours to get my brother’s house. I shook my head and turned onto the main street and looked around for a gas station. Once I spotted one, I walked up to it and asked the clerk if I could use their payphone. I told him that me and my boyfriend got into an argument and he put me out. The clerk looked at me, turned his nose down and smiled at me.
“Your boyfriend not a good guy,” the Somalian guy said to me. I looked at him smiled as he handed his phone to me. I sat there debating on who should I call, or who I know would pick me up. I wanted to call Brooklyn but I was feeling some type of way towards her. I heard Killa and Loco talking and I heard them saying that Brooklyn told them that me and my brother stole the drugs. Like we put a gun to her head and told her to go along with the situation. Sounded like a rat to me, but then I guess I could never know in a situation like that. I dialed my brother, Jay’s number and waited for him to pick up.
“Hello.” He sounded sleepy.
“Jaymere?” I said to him.
