by Sky Winters
“No more drinking for me. My system just can’t handle it.” Joy flushed her sick away and leaned her head on the toilet, grateful for it’s cool, smooth surface against her cheek. She took a deep breath. She’d have to go and make her dad some breakfast; he needed a cup of coffee less than five minutes after waking up. Shakily, she stood and turned to face her reflection in the mirror.
There, in the reflection, was a big pregnant belly hanging off Joy’s reflected frame. Her heart stopped. She couldn’t be pregnant, could she? She’d had her period at least two months ago. When she’d skipped one, she had just shrugged it off as stress. It was right around Zak’s disappearance, after all. This belly was big enough for a fully-formed baby, not a newly-made fetus.
Joy’s hand smoothed down the front of her body, feeling the tight stretch of skin over her abdomen and the lump underneath. What was going on?
Quickly, she dressed in a big, baggy sweater and loose jeans. Even the big, unbelted waistband was tight around her new frame and the middle of her top stretched over her belly. Would Dad notice?
She went out into the kitchen quickly and got the coffee machine started. She threw some bread in the toaster and set out the eggs. Still rushing, she penned a quick note.
Woke up ill. Ran off to see the doc. Be home soon. Joy. She put it on a plate where her dad would be sure to find it, grabbed her purse, and ran out the door.
Even though it had been about a week since she’d seen the gang, she had a feeling she knew where they were. Anytime they wanted to be outside of town, they liked to hang out at a little campground not far from where they had their late-night bonfires. Joy headed that direction; she wanted an explanation from Zak and she wanted it right that moment.
She pulled up to the campsite and saw that yes, she’d guessed correctly; the whole gang was there and sleeping soundly. Their feet were sticking out of randomly arranged tents and there were remnants of their latest party all over the place. Joy walked out into the grass, kicking aside empty beer cans and flattened chip bags until she reached the biggest tent. Zak’s bike was parked outside.
He was there, snoring blissfully away as if nothing in the world could affect him. She reached down and shook him rudely awake.
“Morning, Zak.”
“Huh? Wha—hey, Joy.” He smiled sleepily at the surprise, not fully awake. His hands reached up for her to pull her down into the sleeping bag with him but she yanked herself back. “Come on, sweetie, come lie down…” She could see him drifting off into a dream again and clapped her hands close to his face.
“Zak! You have to wake up right now.”
He snorted and shook his head in a big no from side to side. Joy shook him again. “Zak, come on! This is important!”
Finally, he blinked his eyes open and, through his blurred vision, looked at Joy as she slowly took shape in front of him. She looked weird; something about her was bigger. She had on big clothes and her face was panicked and pale. He rubbed the last of the grogginess from his eyes and looked at her again. This time, he put his hands on her belly.
“You’re pregnant.”
“Yeah, no kidding. You want to explain how I entered my third trimester in just a few months?” She started breathing quickly and pacing back and forth in the tent. “I mean, how is this even possible? I know it’s yours; it has to be, but, but, we’ve been dating for like, two months. Two months! And look at me!”
She lifted her shirt to show him her big belly and he took it in, smiling just a little. “What are you so happy about,” she demanded and his smile instantly disappeared.
“Joy,” he said, reaching out for her hands, “come here.” She sat down facing him and let him take both of her hands. He massaged her fingers and she breathed a little easier. He hung his head for a moment, then looked at her with a serious expression.
“There’s something I should have told you a long time ago,” he began. “Do you remember my father; how odd he was? He actually got kicked out of the three restaurants in town because he ate so much. And he had to be outdoors all the time, do you remember?”
Joy thought back. Zak’s father had been just like him: restless, an outdoorsman, a heavy drinker, and huge eater despite his medium build. There had always been something different about him, something in his eyes that set him apart from everyone else. She couldn’t quite recall the last time she’d seen him, either. Like Zak, he had just up and left one day.
“He was an outsider, your dad. Kind of like you.”
“An outsider,” Zak said, letting out a big breath, “yeah. That’s one way of describing him. You see Joy, the men in my family, they’re different. My dad, me, my uncles and grandfather; we’re not entirely human.”
“What?” Joy felt a strange, cold sensation creeping along her skin. “What are you, then?”
“Maybe,” Zak said, setting her hands down in her lap and standing up, “maybe it would be better if I just showed you.”
Zak stood above her and closed his eyes. Slowly, he began to work his jaw back and forth. His face seemed to extend while his nose shrank and his ears lifted to the top of his head. His shoulders became big and rounded and his hands changed to heavy circles with long claws. Joy didn’t move, she couldn’t have if she’d wanted to. She watched Zak sprout thick brown hair all over his body. His legs became heavy and his hips spread to a wide, round shape, making him stand on all fours.
Still sitting on the sleeping bag, Joy found herself face to face with the same, large brown bear that she had seen attack Aris. The bear breathed it’s heavy hot breath onto her with loud, labored breathing. The two of them watched each other, not moving.
Trembling, Joy reached up and touched the bear’s face as gently as she could. His eyes became soft and the bear’s massive head leaned into her touch, enjoying the feel of her hand. She barely breathed as she focused on her reflection in his big, glassy eyes. “Zak? Are you in there?”
The bear stared at her, then gave her a small, almost imperceptible nod. The air in her lungs came rushing out and tears came to her eyes. “Am I pregnant with someone like you? Is that why it happened so fast?” Again, he gave a small nod. With tears sliding down her face, she tilted her head forward to touch her forehead to his. They stayed like that for a moment, bear and human together, then Joy looked up.
“Can you turn back? I need to be able to talk to you.” The bear lay down and covered his head in his massive paws. She moved back, uncertain how another transformation was going to go. Starting with his feet, his hair began to retract and his shape slowly returned to that of a human male, but it took a long time. When his transformation had finally completed, the sun was high and other members of the gang were up and wandering around, grumbling about the lack of food.
When the last trace of bear was gone, Zak looked up at her. He was naked and lying on his stomach and his face was white with exhaustion. She lay next to him and kissed his cheek. “Shh. Don’t move. Get your strength back. I’ll tell the gang you need the morning off, okay?”
He shook his head no. “They. Need. Me.”
Joy got Zak dressed and then helped him up. He was horribly weak and could barely stand, but he insisted on leaving the tent. So Joy, pregnant and in shock, walked with her arm around Zak, her faint boyfriend who was not entirely human. They stepped out into the sunlight and found the gang waiting in a loose collection outside the tent. They didn’t look surprised or confused at the sight of their leader looking so rough. They just gave a little nod to Joy and glanced down at her big belly.
Carefully, Zak sat on a big rock and took in the group. Petunia brought him a bottle of orange juice and he gulped it down.
“Thanks.” He wiped his mouth and looked around. “As you can all see, Joy is pregnant. This means she’s going to need our protection until her babies are born. I want a security detail around her twenty-four seven. These babies are definitely part of the brown bear line. That means they’ll be very powerful,” he looked to Joy, “and very important. We
can’t let anything happen to them.”
The group nodded, still unsurprised. Joy looked over at Petunia who gave her a big grin.
“Congratulations, mama bear. You’re definitely having at least two.”
Joy touched her stomach and felt a shift under her skin. She thought of two little forms inside her tumbling over one another, somersaulting around like bear cubs. Her shock set in as she realized that was essentially what she would be having: two baby bears.
“I want five of you out getting some food. I transitioned this morning but I didn’t get a chance to recover so I need some extra. Get back as soon as you can. Joy, you’ll have to stay here until we can organize protection for you.”
Five bikers roared off and the rest came up to hug Joy and tell her congratulations. She accepted it all graciously, but out of the corner of her eye she kept tabs on Zak. He looked extremely weak, like he might fall off of his perch at any moment. After a little bit of small talk, she joined him again and put her arm around him.
“Sorry,” he whispered. “I usually transition slowly. That’s why I went off into the woods, so I could stay in bear form for a couple of days and then take a few hours to go back to human. I’ll be okay.”
Joy gave him a kiss on the cheek and wrapped her arms around him. “You’ve worked really hard to hide this from me, haven’t you?”
He leaned his head into her. “I had to. I wanted you to be safe. This isn’t an easy life, Joy.”
She lifted up out of their hug and looked at him. “Why are you in so much danger?”
Zak looked up to see Petunia standing with fast food bags and a cup of coffee. She handed it all to the lovebirds. Zak took it gratefully and started ripping into the paper. “Petunia,” he said to her, “tell Joy what happened to you when that hunter saw you transition.”
Petunia sucked the air in through her teeth. “Oh, that’s a rough story. Let me get a cigarette.” She slipped a smoke out of her carton and then cupped her hands over it to get the flame. After she’d taken a long drag, she dove in.
“I was in the woods. We’d all transitioned together a few days before and everyone was going back to human one by one, but I was taking my time. I always love my time in the woods; I fish, I sleep, I walk forever. It’s the best. But, I knew I was lagging behind and I needed to move on. So, I found a little clearing and lay down. To shift back to human, we have to go inside ourselves and really focus. I’m on the ground, I’ve got my head covered, I’m about halfway through the change and then I felt something on my neck.
“It was the butt of a shotgun. A hunter had been just out of sight and I wasn’t as careful as I should have been. Now, I was caught. This guy didn’t want to shoot me, he wanted to keep me in one place. I heard him call out to someone that he’d found something crazy. He probably thought he could sell me to some lab or a TV studio, who knows. All I knew was, I had to get out of there. I stopped changing; uncovered my eyes, focused on keeping my bear form and, well…”
Joy leaned forward. “What did you do?”
She shrugged and let out a big cloud of smoke. “I had to kill them.” She turned and walked away to sit by herself for a moment. Behind her, Joy was frozen in panic.
“Zak!” She grabbed his shoulder. “What is this? Why did she have to kill them?”
He balled up the paper of the food he’d finished and took Joy’s hand. “Listen, we don’t want to kill anyone. She only took those guys out because they’d seen that she was something different. She’s not wholly human and she’s not entirely animal. People can’t deal with that.”
She moved closer to him and spoke in a whisper. “Have you ever killed someone?”
He shook his head. “No. Never. I specialize in scaring people away. I find it’s much more effective.”
“Like you did with Aris?”
“Exactly like that. He’s alive, but I’d be very surprised if he ever bothered us again.”
They spent the morning together, lazing around in the sun while Zak got his strength back. Joy relished the opportunity to relax in the grass. Pregnancy was surprisingly exhausting and she dozed for a couple of hours at least.
By the time she woke up it was late morning and Zak was back to his old self, joking around and play fighting with his crew. She propped herself up on her elbows and motioned to Greg to help her up. “Quick,” she said, “I have to pee like you wouldn’t believe.”
A little later, Zak and three other crew members were ready to escort Joy home. They explained to her that they would be camping out near her house and available to take her wherever she wanted to go, day or night. She wondered how her dad was going to like having a faction of bikers across the street from them. Maybe his memory problems would kick in and keep him from paying too much attention to them. A girl could dream, anyway.
They went down the street as a group, Joy sitting in the sidecar of Petunia’s bike. Her big belly made it impossible for her to hang on to Zak and she was a little sad to see the empty space behind him as he drove in the front. A kick to her insides reminded her why safety was tantamount. She put a hand where she felt the baby’s foot and rubbed it. It was probably her imagination, but she could have sworn she felt its toes wiggle under her hand.
At her dad’s house, everything looked quiet. She needed help getting up from the sidecar and once again she was desperate for a bathroom, but she was smiling. Zak took her by the arm and led her to the house, making her laugh.
“I’m not going to break! I can walk.”
“I know,” he said, leaning in to nibble her neck, “but I want to spoil you.”
They approached the front door and Zak’s face twisted up for a moment. He stopped Joy. “Something’s wrong in here.” He leaned forward and smelled the air. “Joy, we have to go.”
“No!” She quickly opened the door, still looking at Zak. “If something’s wrong that means we have to get my dad and—”
“And what, Joy?”
The sound of his voice made all of Joy’s happiness and confidence dissolve. There, sitting in her living room with a pistol aimed at her father, was Aris. He was banged up and bandaged, but otherwise still the same old Aris she remembered. He sat stock still and let his eyes do the talking. Joy took stock of the situation; both men were seated directly across from one another. Her father was clearly terrified but Aris was calm. He loved making other people scared; it was what he did best.
He pulled back the hammer of the gun and looked at Joy’s father. “Tell your daughter to stop being so rude and join us. Her boyfriend can go.”
“I’m not going anywhere.” Zak stepped into the living room with his hands balled into fists. He was already breathing hard. “I won’t let you terrorize the mother of my child or anyone close to her.”
“Terrorize?” Aris sneered at the word. “Who on earth is terrorizing anyone? You think I want to shoot him? I can’t imagine a worse outcome. All I want,” he said, affecting an innocent tone, “is for everyone to come to their senses. And that means you, wifey.”
“You know I don’t want to be with you anymore.” Joy kept her hands on her belly as she spoke. Her babies had gone completely still, sensing how scared she was. “I’m with Zak. I’m pregnant with his baby. Just sign the papers and move on. There’s no reason for you to keep after me.”
Aris let out a sad sigh. “Well, I’m sorry to hear you say that, Joy.” He lifted the gun and pointed it at Steve’s head. “Cuz now your dad is going to die.”
A loud bang rang out. Joy screamed and Zak dove across the room straight at Aris. Steve fell out of his chair and onto the floor as a horrible fight broke out. Joy couldn’t look. Instead, she pushed herself against the wall and did everything she could to be invisible. She could hear the TV shatter, the lamp crash against the wall, and fists smack into skin. The wall began to bend and fold under her and the floor came up to meet her. As soon as it did, Joy’s vision went black and she drifted off into the void.
Chapter 9
It w
as several days before Joy would let Zak hold her again. The shock of seeing Aris, the shot in her dad’s shoulder, and their days visiting him in the hospital all kept her from his tent. He didn’t say anything, just waited patiently for his love to return to him. She could feel his eyes on her any time he was close, but she couldn’t return his gaze. It was just too much.
Finally, after a couple of weeks, Steve was back home and only a little worse for the wear. His shoulder was stiff but, as he put it: “What am I, some athlete? I can do everything I need to do.” A physical therapist came by every day to help him move his stiff joint and Joy sat with them, participating in all the same exercises.
One night they sat watching a trashy reality show and Steve suddenly clicked off the TV. “Joy,” he said, “how much longer are you going to keep this up?”
“Whuh?” She had a mouth full of popcorn. Her pregnancy was in its final stages and she was constantly starving.
“Don’t give me that.” Steve took the popcorn from her hands and pointed at the phone. “Go call that bear of yours and spend the evening together. The two of you will be parents soon and won’t have the strength. If you two want to go out ever again, now’s the time.”
Joy started to protest but her father just pointed at the phone. She heaved herself out of the chair and went over to call Zak. She knew the gang had a couple of phones they shared and she had both numbers memorized, but she was reluctant. She just wasn’t sure how she felt about her future as a mother. Couldn’t she just stare at the TV and forget about it for a night?
“Hello, Rick’s Roadkill Cafe. You kill ‘em we grill ‘em.”
Joy laughed. “Hi Greg. It’s Joy. Is Zak around?”
Greg called Zak over and told him who it was.
“Joy? Joy, sweetheart, are you there?”
“Yes, I’m here. I’m wondering if I can see you tonight.”
