I hopped in next to him and kissed him gently. When I pulled back, I looked into his eyes. "What were you reading? I thought you'd be sleeping," I joked.
"Just, um, a book for school. Nothing important," he replied as he slid down the bed, pulling me with him. He had a guilty look on his handsome face and I didn't like it. I reached over the side of the bed and picked up the book, looking at the cover. It wasn't what I expected.
"Deliverance? What the hell class is this for?" I asked. It was an odd book to be reading.
"It's for, um…don't get mad. I looked up some shit online and found an article regarding when a lover…well, something like what we're dealing with. I needed to know, Colton, how to be supportive of you, and the author of the article used this book as a basis of what someone goes through. I'm trying as much as I can to learn how to be the best partner I can to you, so yeah, I'm reading that book.
"I love you, and I want to be there for you. I don't want to be an insensitive prick, okay? I want to be as supportive as I can, and you aren't in the place to talk about it, so I resorted to trying to figure it out from a book. Please don't take it the wrong way."
It could have gone two ways. I could have pitched a fit and stormed out, but when I weighed his words, he was right. I didn't talk about it with anyone, really, and if he was trying to understand what I was going through, I had to give him a lot of credit. A lot of people wouldn't take the extra step. It was something one did for someone they loved.
I sighed. "I'm not mad, babe. I hate I can't really talk about it. I mean, you know what happened, and I don't fucking know what I can add to it by talking about it. I guess at the end of the day, I just don't understand why they did it. What did they have to gain by doing that to me?" I laid my head against his bare chest and listened to his heartbeat under my ear. It was comforting as the tears poured down my face and I tried to stop them.
"The only thing I can come up with, and Mom would be the best person to ask, is control. Usually, when people do things like that they want to control someone, even if it's by fear. You turned him down when he made advances and you weren't intimidated by him. I'd guess it wounded his ego. He probably has some deep seeded issues we'll never know about, but for one reason or another, he didn't like the fact you wouldn't…you refused to do that to him. When he got relocated across campus, it was another blow that set him off, I'd guess.
"He's disturbed, love. He needs to be put under psychiatric care more than you or me, I promise you that," he finished.
I thought about what he said and I sat up, shocked. "I'm no fucking better than him because I…"
Andre grabbed my hands and looked at me, having sat up as well. "No. No, Colton. You need to control the progression of our relationship because of what they did to you. You're nothing like them. You're absolutely nothing like them."
He gently turned my head and kissed me softly. "I love you. I know the real you…the sweet, sweet man I met again back in September…and I'll get him back, I know it. You need to be in control right now, so then you just be in control. Now, you came in here for a reason. What can I do for you?" he asked with a sweet smile.
Looking into his eyes brought me clarity, and I'd never lie about that. "I came in here to ask you if I could make love to you. I wanted to back up my words with showing you." Fuck, did I sound like a pussy? I should have said something else. Something a lot smoother. Fuck, I should leave.
I started to get up before he grabbed my hand. "Nuh-uh. You teased it all day, and I've been waiting. Please, don't go," he pleaded as he kneeled on the mattress and held my hands. The look in his eyes had me hard, and well, I guess I couldn't deny him anything. I wanted him, and he wanted me. What else did I need really?
"I, uh, I know how not to do it, obviously, but I need you to tell me how to make it as painless as possible for you. I know it can be because I've watched enough porn to see it can be done successfully and satisfactorily for both partners. Tell me how," I implored, though it sounded like begging to my ears.
He pulled up my hand, seeing the condom and lube, and he smiled. "You're off to a good start. Pants and shirt off," he ordered. He placed the things on the bedside table, and hurriedly took off his pants as well. We climbed into bed and he pulled the top sheet up over us. We both turned on our sides to face each other, heads resting on our hands, and suddenly, my throat was dry.
He placed his right hand on my neck and gently rubbed his thumb over my jaw. "The getting ready is actually part of the fun, sweetheart. Don't worry about anything, okay?" I nodded and leaned forward, kissing him gently, once…twice…three times before sweeping my tongue over his bottom lip.
When he moaned, I pushed him onto his back and deepened the kiss, feeling my nerves calm substantially. I noticed the faint hint of mint from his toothpaste on his tongue, mixed with his own unique taste which I was coming to crave.
While I kissed him, I brushed my hands down his chest, tracing the definition of his abs, and feeling him squirm a little. I pulled back to see his eyes were closed and he was smiling. "What's wrong?" God, why do I have to be so fucking insecure?
"Nothing at all. Just tickled a little." Tickled? Okay, so the gentle approach wasn't exactly going to get me the panting results I was hoping for. It was time to step things up a bit.
I brushed my hand further down until I found the neatly trimmed patch of curls. I leaned forward again, planting my lips on his neck, kissing first then licking while I scratched my fingers in the curls, tugging gently. I licked up his neck to his ear and whispered, "Still funny?"
Before he could answer, I brushed my thumb over his hard cock, hearing him suck in a breath. That's more like it!
I kissed, licked, and bit my way down his chest until I got to those curls, and I buried my nose in them, inhaling deeply. "Fuck, Colton," he moaned quietly.
I licked his cock and blew air on it, glancing up his body to see him watching me. That turned me on a lot. I bobbed my head up and down on him, not taking my eyes from his, and I watched him reach over to the nightstand and grab the lube. My hands were resting on his abs, my fingers gently scratching him, and I felt the gentle shiver.
I released him from my mouth and looked up. "Cold?" I knew I was teasing him a little, but I was trying like hell to calm myself so I didn't shoot off before I ever got on the fucking condom.
"Not hardly. Here," he ordered as he took my right hand and squeezed some lube on my fingers. He opened his legs wide and bent his knees, giving me access to his tight entrance. He took my index finger and began swirling it around the opening, spreading the lube.
"Start with one, and after I get used to that, then add another, and then another. I’ve…well, it might take a little time." I nodded and decided maybe I should continue to torture him to help him relax, so I bent forward and took him back in my mouth, gently rolling his balls with my left hand as I continued to prepare him.
By the time I had the third finger inside him, he was thrusting onto them and into my mouth at the same time, clutching the sheet in his fists. Suddenly, I felt something hit me in the head, and when I looked up, I saw the condom he'd thrown at me resting on his stomach.
I laughed as I released him from my mouth. "Open it, hot shot. I'm kinda busy here." He grabbed it and opened it with shaking hands. I stopped what I was doing and looked at him, not moving my fingers.
"Babe, if you don't want to do this, we don't have to," I began. I didn't want him to be afraid. Fuck, I was afraid enough for both of us.
"NO! I swear to God if you stop I'll impale myself on you. I'm trying to keep from blowing before we get to the good stuff. Please, put that fucking thing on and get inside me." Oh? Hmm. Not what I expected at all.
I removed my fingers from his ass and quickly slid on the condom, just like I'd been taught in health class. I moved closer to him and pushed his knees up to give me access. I teased the head of my cock against his hole, and then remembered I needed more lube. I slathered myself up and slid my hand down hi
s cock to give him some friction.
"If it starts to hurt, tell me and I'll pull out," I ordered. He nodded, and I took a deep breath. I held my cock with one hand and nervously guided it to him, beginning to push inside. Once the head was inside, I looked at him to see eyes were closed tightly.
"We're not doing this. I'm not…"
"If you take your dick out of my ass, I'll never speak to you again," he stated a little louder than necessary.
"Shh! Your parents just came up a few minutes a go," I chastised. He surprised me by laughing which made him clench a little, tightening around my cock. Fuck, it felt good.
"Colton, don't talk about my parents when I'm trying to keep my sanity because you're taking too fucking long to fuck me." With that, he moved his legs, hooking his feet around my ass and pulling me inside him further. I pulled back a little and had to close my eyes because I almost lost it.
He was breathing hard, but he didn't relent, pulling himself onto me slowly. When I felt my balls against his ass, I stopped him. "You okay?"
"Yeah. Just give me a minute," he whispered. I reached forward and took his hands, kissing the top of each of them before I bent forward and kissed his sternum, trying not to move.
I looked up at him and saw the smile. "I love you, Andre." It felt important to tell him in that moment because what he was doing for me was something I wasn't sure I could ever do for him. He absolutely deserved to be reminded I loved him and I appreciated him giving himself to me.
He placed his hands on both sides of my face and gently pulled me up to look into his eyes. "I love you, too. I'll love you more if you move," he teased. I laughed, pulled back, and pushed in slowly, bringing loud moans from both of us.
He sealed my mouth with his, and I proceeded to slowly make love to my boyfriend. I kissed him and moved inside him, trying to hold off as long as I could before I exploded. He was kissing me back and moaning, which gave me every indication he was enjoying it as much as me. "Lean up and pull me onto your thighs, baby," he instructed.
I hated I couldn't kiss him in this position, but when I did as he said, he moaned loudly. "Prostate," he groaned. I knew what it was; I was just surprised my dick hit it when I was fucking him. Since he liked it, I made sure not to change the position.
"Harder, baby," he begged. I wasn't so sure about that, but when he reached down and grabbed my waist, pulling me forcefully into him, and then he cried out "Fuck, yes," I realized I must be doing something right, so I continued pounding into him and picking up the pace because my belly was beginning to tighten, not to mention my balls, and I knew exactly what was about to happen.
I reached down and grasped his hard cock, sliding my hand up and down the shaft and swirling my hand around the head, stroking the ridge while adding a bit of pressure. "Oh, fuck, yes, Colton. Just like that, baby. I'm about to come. Please don't fucking stop," he pleaded. Oh, I don't think I could stop for anything in the world.
"Yessss!" he hissed and shot off in my hand. I let go right behind him, slowing my stroke to ride it out, my mind was fantastically blown, just like my load.
I bent forward and rested my sweaty head on his chest, trying to catch my breath. I felt his fingers gently stroking my scalp, and I knew the meaning of true bliss.
I felt myself beginning to soften, so I sat up and held onto the condom, seeing him wince a little, which worried me. I got up and went to the bathroom to dispose of the condom, and I looked down as I took it off, grateful to see there was no sign of blood. I hadn't hurt him, which gave me a little relief.
I wrapped it in a tissue and tossed it in the trash can, grabbing a washcloth and towel to clean him up. When I returned to the bedroom, I couldn't look at him. I kneeled between his legs, seeing he hadn't moved. I wiped down his chest where he'd shot off, then I moved lower and gently cleaned him, happy to see there was no sign of blood there either.
I dried him, and then went back to the bathroom to toss the things into the hamper. I grabbed two ibuprofens and filled a glass with water before I went back into the room. I nervously sat on the side of the bed and placed my hand on his chest because his eyes were closed.
"Babe, are you okay?" His eyes shot open and he smiled brightly, sitting up and leaning on his left hand.
"I'm fine, love. Are you okay? You didn't say anything and you hurried away. Was it too much?" He looked quite concerned, and I realized where I'd fucked up. I had to make it right.
"No, baby, it was amazing. I just wanted to get you cleaned up and make sure I didn't hurt you. Here, take these," I ordered as I started to hand him the pills. He didn't move, only opening his mouth and sticking out his tongue.
I chuckled as I placed the pills on his tongue and offered him the water. When he swallowed, he took the glass and placed it on the bedside table, turning off the light and pulling me into the bed with him.
"I know you can't sleep here, but will you stay for a bit?" he asked. I settled on my side, my head on his shoulder as he stroked my hair again.
"Colton, was it…was it what you expected?" I could hear he was anxious, and I couldn't have that at all.
"Oh, hell yes. It was fucking awesome. How, um, how about you?" I asked nervously.
He gently lifted my chin to look into his eyes, which were only visible because of the moonlight coming in through the French doors that led to a balcony. He was smiling, and my nerves calmed a bit.
"It was incredible, Colton. It didn't hurt. It just burned a bit until I got used to you, but then it felt really fucking good. I had no idea it could feel like that, and I'm glad I didn't find out until I was with you. I hate that fucker so much I could walk back to Seattle and kill him with my bare hands right now."
He leaned forward and kissed me gently, and I felt my heart stutter a little. It was so intimate, almost like what I'd witnessed when I watched his parents that morning, and I truly had hope in my heart for the first time in a long time. I hoped we could be together just like them for a very long time, and I hoped I'd get to a point where I'd be able to have him make love to me. That was a goal. If I held myself back from him, I was allowing those fucking pricks to have control over me like he'd mentioned. I was not going to live my life like that.
Chapter Twenty-Two
The After…
I woke with a start, my eyes flashing open to unfamiliar surroundings. I'd been dreaming of making love to Andre, but when I saw the soft green walls, I knew I wasn't in the spare room which was done in blue and tan tones. When I turned to my left, I felt the brush of wild hair against my nose and looked down to see Andre lying on my shoulder. It was then I felt his hand holding mine between us, and I figured out I'd fallen asleep in his bed. That actually made me happy.
I glanced at the clock, seeing it was just after seven, so I gently slipped out of bed, covered him back up, and kissed him on the forehead. I pulled on my t-shirt and sleep pants, and unlocked the door to hurry across the hallway to my room.
I grabbed my stuff and went to the bathroom, quickly taking care of morning business. After I was dressed, I stopped by Andre's room, peeking in to see he was still sleeping. He had his arms around the pillow I'd slept on, and he was smiling. I grabbed my phone from my pocket and took a picture of it to remind me of the wonderful night, not that the memory would ever dull in my mind or my heart.
I pulled the door closed quietly and hurried downstairs before either of the Duprees caught me. When I walked into the kitchen, I saw Les sitting at the table with half a grapefruit, scoring it. She had coffee and juice on the counter, and she was reading something that rested on the table next to her.
When she heard me, she pulled off her glasses and looked up, smiling gently. "Good morning, sweetie. How'd you sleep?"
I poured myself some coffee and added cream and sugar, taking a seat across from her. "I actually slept like the dead," I told her happily.
She giggled as she took a bite of her grapefruit. When she swallowed, she winked at me. "Sex will do that to you." I was grateful I'd
just swallowed my coffee or I'd have spewed all over her.
"Miss…Miss Les…" I began my protest. I really didn't know what to say, so I shut up.
"Oh, don't look so worried. You boys weren't exactly quiet. Jean-Luc isn't quiet either which is why we had our room soundproofed before we moved in. The only reason I heard you was because I got up to bring the empty wine bottle and glasses down. Besides, Colton, my son's twenty-one and far from innocent."
Well, I'd agree, but what I did to him last night was a first. Probably not going to tell his mother about that. "I'm not sure what to say, ma'am. I meant no disrespect," I responded, not able to look her in the eye.
"None was taken, sweetie. So, how did you feel after? Did it trigger anything for you?"
I glanced at the clock, seeing it was just 7:20 AM. "Now, Dr. Les isn’t on duty right now." She laughed again. I had no desire to discuss our sex life with my lover’s mother. It would be bad enough if I had to discuss it with Ms. Brownley when she arrived later that morning. I knew she’d be concerned with regard to "after," so I'd have to think about how we broached the subject without me melting in the chair.
"Touché. Can I fix you anything? There are bagels and English muffins. I could make you an egg if you'd like. I'd planned to make a breakfast casserole, but time just got away from me last night." Her cheeks flushed a bit, and it was my turn to laugh.
I decided to tease her a little. "It does tend to get away from you when you have a handsome Dupree attached to your lips." I saw the look of surprise on her face before she cracked up. I laughed with her because I knew she wasn't expecting me to say anything of the sort, but I felt so incredible after the beautiful night I'd spent with my beautiful boy, I didn't think anything could bring me down.
We were both laughing so hard, tears were rolling down our cheeks. She got up and grabbed tissues from a drawer, handing one to me and kissing my forehead before she returned to her seat. We were drying our eyes, having calmed down considerably when Jean-Luc came in from the garage.
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