She turned to Herb and Chief Dennison. "Well, aren't you going to introduce yourselves? That's the proper thing to do when you meet a new person, isn’t it?"
They both introduced themselves and shook her tiny hand. She smiled brightly and looked down for a moment while I took in her appearance. She was wearing a pink turtleneck with black cotton pants and a pair of black slippers. She looked all of fourteen and my heart broke for her because the place in which she was stuck? It would fucking suck the life out of anyone.
She turned to Chief Dennison and smiled. "What's this?" she asked as she pointed to the file in front of him.
He cleared his throat and clasped his hands over the top of the file, not opening it. "Miss Asher, we're here to talk about what happened to you on July 22, 2014. I know you've probably told this story a hundred times, but can you tell the three of us what happened?"
She sat back and crossed her arms over her chest, taking all of us in. "I've told that story to anyone who would listen, but nobody will believe me. Why should I tell you two?" she asked as she looked at Herb and Chief Dennison.
I quickly deduced she didn't trust them, so I reached across the table and extended my hand. She placed her small one in mine and closed her eyes, smiling. "Oh, you're a good soul. I'll talk to you. Do you trust them?"
"I do. Just talk to me. Tell me what happened," I asked. For reasons unknown to me, she seemed to trust me. I was going to give her every reason to believe me, and I was going to figure out how to get her out of that horrid place. I knew in my soul she didn't belong there. I could see it in her eyes and feel it in the gentle touch. She had no more business in there than I did.
"I have to clear up a few other things first. I didn't set my parents’ house on fire. I told my daddy there was a gas leak. I told him that morning at breakfast, but he wouldn't listen. When the stove caught fire, I was outside because they wouldn't get up. After they got out, the police brought me here. I didn't even get to speak to a lawyer or a Judge, for that matter. I didn't start the fire; I just dreamed it would start."
“It’s referenced in here that it was determined you tried to kill your parents by disconnecting the gas line on the kitchen stove,” Chief Dennison told her.
She giggled sweetly, not taking her eyes off mine. "Of course, Uncle Mark had to put down a reason why they brought me here instead of taking me to jail. He said he was only protecting me because jail would be much worse. My parents didn’t say a word because I’m the crazy girl who hears voices. They told him I had started the fire to prove a point. That's what they all said."
"Uncle Mark?" I asked.
"He was the Chief of Police before this good man got the job. Anyway, it's too late to prove it now, but I didn't start that fire. Now, regarding July 22, I didn't see it coming.
"See, I happen to dream about things happening before they do. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s an ability that runs in my family. Of course, nobody believes it because there are so many people out there who claim future sight but really are phonies. I’m not one of them.
“That particular day, I was sitting in the yard making a daisy chain. The Turners lived down the road from our home and Jameson would ride his bike by the house and call me names every day.
"Everyone in the neighborhood thought I was demented because I knew things before they happened, and no one would believe me when I tried to warn them in advance of upcoming events. That day, Jameson stopped and hopped off his bike, walking to the yard. He sat down next to me and began talking to me. It was all pleasant at first. He asked me to tell him his fortune as if that was how it worked," she scoffed.
She turned to look at the nurse in the room and smiled. "Loretta, can you get these gentlemen and me some water?" The woman looked up and smiled.
"Will you be okay, Natalie?"
"Oh, silly, I'm fine. Colton, here, will take care of me." She squeezed my hand and winked. The woman left the room and then Natalie turned back to us.
"She's part of the reason I'm kept in solitary. She tells them I'm trying to hurt myself, but I'm not doing that any longer. I used to cut myself because I couldn't tell anyone about the things I knew and be taken seriously, so I was frustrated and had to let it out somehow," she explained as she slipped up the arms on her sweater, showing us the thin scars which appeared to be almost silver-like in the noonday sun through the bar-covered windows.
I held the gasp inside and looked into her eyes. "So, you used to cut yourself?"
I'd heard about that shit over the years, but I'd never met anyone who'd done it. It wasn't anything I'd ever encountered and I tried to hide my shock. "Did it help?" I asked.
"Only for a short time, but I'm getting off track. Anyway, when I told Jameson I knew he was up to no good, he got angry. I told him I knew what he was doing there, and I threatened to tell his mother if he didn't leave. I honestly didn’t know, but I had a bad feeling in my stomach about it, like you know how your stomach seems to sink when you have a bad feeling. It was like that."
She then went on to describe how he carried her behind a shed on their property and violated her, calling her his whore the whole time. She told us she'd never been with a man because she didn't think any man would want to be with someone crazy. Her parents had called her crazy all her life and she believed them, which made my heart break.
"I don't think you're crazy," I told her quietly.
She looked at me and smiled. "He didn't tie me up like he did you. He was bigger than me even though I was older, so he didn't need to. You're strong, Colton, and your boyfriend…he loves you. You know, what is ungiven freely is taken, but not lost."
She was looking at me intently, but I was confused. "I'm not sure what you mean, Natalie."
"I mean, you didn't give yourself to that demon any more than I did. He took it, but that doesn't mean I'm not a virgin anymore. Until I decide to give myself to a man, I'm pure. Just like you, Colton."
It all seemed lost on Herb and Chief Dennison, but oddly, I got it. It made sense, and it gave me a hell of a lot of hope for the future. "Natalie, tell me the rest of it," I implored.
She smiled sweetly. "You have kind eyes, Colton. I'm glad you finally showed up. I've been waiting for you to come see me, you know."
I looked at her. "Did you know this was going to happen to me before it happened?"
She gripped my hand. "No, no. If I had, I'd have tried to stop it somehow. I actually didn’t dream about you before you were attacked, only after. Besides, I didn’t know where in the world you were so there wasn’t anything I could do."
Herb looked at Chief Dennison. "Okay, none of this is a matter of public record. The damn file at my office is under the name of ‘John Doe’. I haven't even put his name on it."
She giggled. "That was kind of you Sheriff, but if Colton comes forward with accusations, people will know who he is and they’ll still gossip. Anyway, Jameson Turner raped me, and then when he was finished, he pulled out a pocket knife. It was a nice one with a mosaic handle. Unfortunately, he used it for a bad thing. They said I did it to myself, but who, really, would carve something like this into their own skin," she responded. She stood from her chair and took off the pink turtleneck, a long-sleeved t-shirt, and a short-sleeved t-shirt.
She pulled down the top of a camisole and exposed most of her chest. There were words that made me ill. "This whore is mine." They were in blue ink.
I stood from my chair and took off my shirt, turning my back to her and showing her my scar. "This ass is mine." It was in black ink.
We both redressed and sat down at the table just as the nurse came back inside. Chief Dennison looked at her and stood up, shouting, "You, out!" She gave him a suspicious look as she placed the bottles on the table. Herb knocked them off and turned to her with a look on his face that clearly told her he meant business.
"You heard him, out!" Herb shouted. She looked at Natalie, as did I, and Natalie was smiling brightly at the two men’s orders.
The woman lef
t, and the chief of police pulled out his phone, walking to a corner of the room. Herb picked up the bottles of water, and it was apparent one of them had been opened because it was leaking. "Does that woman take care of you every day?" he asked.
"She does, but she thinks I drink that water. I don't. She also thinks I don't know her sister is Jameson Turner's mother. I've learned how to play the game, Sheriff. Now, how are you boys going to bust me out of here?" she asked with a bright smile. I was stunned.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
The Surprises of Everyday Life
If anyone had told me that meeting Natalie Asher would bring a change in me, I'd have laughed. She definitely had her issues and she might have been a lot on the quirky side, but to those she chose to open up to, she told things one couldn't dispute.
After I related the story to Andre, he called his mother back in California. When Leslie Dupree showed up with a lawyer, well, things took a far different turn than any of us, even Natalie, expected.
The corruption in the Vicksburg Police Department to which Chief Dennison had sort of alluded was brought into the spotlight, and Judge Carlson remanded Natalie to Les' custody as a "Friend of the Court." What it meant was Les stayed in Mississippi with Natalie for several months and worked with her to get her ready to testify if they could bring a legitimate case to trial.
Natalie’s case was reopened and thankfully, there was still evidence on file from her attack. It was run against the evidence Seattle forensics had taken from Nick's bedspread and my underwear, and it was a match. It was enough to support my case so the Seattle District Attorney could name Jameson Turner a person of interest in my attack, and he was arrested. He was also compelled by the judicial system to give a DNA sample to tie him to my assault.
I had to file for a restraining order which I got easily, and well, things were progressing. Andre and I had sat down with our friends shortly before classes started again in the spring and I told them the story. After tears and hugs and nothing but love and support, we all seemed to move into a weird space where they were afraid to say anything to me.
I'd talked to Dr. Caldwell about it, and she told me it was to be expected because they didn't want to bring up any bad memories and I'd just have to talk to them and help them get over it. She gave me a card for a support group of friends of survivors, and I made them all promise they'd go at least one time. I wanted my stupid, snarky, good-timing friends back.
Over the spring semester, they all went to a few meetings together. Eventually, they worked through the stages of grief better than I had and we all became better friends because of it. I didn’t take them for granted ever again.
It was a Friday. It wasn't a special Friday at all but it would be a day I’d never forget…well, unless senility was in my future. I was on my break at the bookstore because we'd been busy with the book buy-back that occurred at the end of the school year. I'd been working double shifts all week and was banking a fair amount of cash. My boss had already told me when I needed to come back at the end of the summer, and when I came back, I was going to be promoted to assistant manager. It came with a pay raise, so I certainly didn't bitch about it.
Andre had been working at his internship and finishing up his undergraduate while making inroads into his master's program. His, Lance's, Juan's, and Chip's graduation was the next day, and I was looking forward to it. Andre and I had been attending counseling separately. Dr. Caldwell was great and as much as she helped me, she'd helped Andre learn how to cope with my setbacks. He was…fuck, he was unbelievable with all of it.
Jameson Turner had been extradited to Mississippi to stand trial for the first-degree rape and assault of Natalie Asher. She'd finally found people to listen to her, and she was getting her justice. After his guilty verdict at trial, he was sentenced to do time in a Mississippi State prison. I had a feeling he would become a very unhappy prison wife pretty quickly.
My mom and Herb didn't agree with my decision not to push my rape charges in Washington, but Andre supported me when I explained my reasons to him.
"Look, another trial here might give him the chance to get an acquittal from a closed-minded jury because I'm a gay man, and if he gets acquitted here, there's a chance he can appeal in Mississippi and get the verdict overturned. The jury there sentenced him to twenty-five to life, so I can live with that. I'm going to guess what happens to him in a Mississippi prison will be even worse than what he did to me. I just want to get past it and move on with my life," I explained calmly. I’d considered going after the son-of-a-bitch, but when I looked things up on the internet and spoke with a professor who taught in the Criminal Justice program, I was made aware of a few facts I couldn’t dispute which might mean he’d get his freedom. There was no way I would jeopardize keeping that man behind bars.
Andre held my face in his hands as we stood outside the courtroom after the sentencing, and he kissed me gently. When he pulled back, he looked at me with a smile. "If that's what you want, then I won't push you." I nodded, and that was it.
The only unfortunate thing was that Kamal DuBois disappeared when Jamie Turner was arrested in January. He left the U.S. before a warrant could be sworn out, and nobody knew where he went. If he ever showed up where I was, I wouldn't tell anyone. I'd just deal with him quietly and painfully. That was a promise I made to myself.
"Hey, Colt, there's a woman at the front desk holding up the line. She is insistent you help her. Lee's freaking out and Todd's getting pissed," Amanda advised. Todd was the manager of the store, and he hated the end of the year, as he’d told us all a million times per shift we worked with him.
I'd been typing into my laptop, which was where I kept my journal instead of in a book where anyone could find it. Dr. Caldwell had advised that it could be helpful to me in dealing with my issues going forward, and as much as I bitched about it, in the beginning, it had actually become a good outlet for me when I had a bad day.
I quickly shut down my computer, shoving it into my bag and standing from the small desk. "Seriously? It's the end of the fucking year."
"For you, yes, but some people stay for the summer semester, as I well know. I'm going to be working here over the summer, unlike you, slacker," she teased. She was taking classes over the summer, but I had a feeling it had more to do with a guy she'd met at a frat party. He was in a doctoral program, and he didn't take summers off. Suddenly, our little Amanda was done with partying and became a responsible bookworm. I laughed at her about it, but to her credit, she'd raised her GPA to 3.95. I couldn't laugh that off.
I was taking the summer off because it had been a big year for me on many fronts. I was going to Unionville for two weeks, and then I was coming back to Seattle for a summer job at Harborview as a peer counselor. Dr. Caldwell had recommended me for it, and since Andre was working over the summer and I could stay with him, I accepted it. It didn't pay much, but I was looking forward to it.
Lance and Juan had decided to attempt the long-distance thing. They were spending the summer in New Mexico running a summer camp for homeless kids, and then Lance was going to North Carolina to do his certification work. I didn't know if they'd stay together, but they seemed pretty fucking determined, and well, I had a window into the future no one else did…I had Natalie Asher and her incredible dreams.
Andre and I went to LA for the weekend after the trial in Mississippi. The case was fast-tracked, due to the way she'd been treated over the past three years, and after she testified and he was found guilty, Natalie returned to Los Angeles with Leslie. Andre and I didn't get our spring break in Hawaii because of the trial, but that was fine. Jean-Luc told us we could do it another time.
Natalie was staying with them at the blue house, and Les doted over her as if she was a daughter just come home. She'd set Natalie up with a friend of hers who was a great therapist as I well knew because it was Eve Brownley. Les, once again, stayed out of Natalie’s treatment, heaping the young woman with the love her parents should have given her at the
time of her attack.
On a Saturday morning in early May, Natalie and I found ourselves in the Dupree kitchen together, sharing coffee. She looked at me and smiled. "I'm leaving soon. I want you to know a few things before I go, and I won't be gone forever. I've got things I need to do, so listen up, CJ." Her, using my father’s nickname for me was a surprise at first, but I had the feeling my dad might have had something to do with the way things turned out. He would always be my hero.
Natalie told me she saw me happy. She told me she knew I'd follow my chosen path, but she wouldn't tell me what it was, stating quite adamantly that some things should remain a beautiful surprise. She told me my friends would find their happiness, though it wouldn't always be what they thought it to be at that point in time. She also told me she and I were bound together by a tether that would withstand time and distance. She told me not to worry about her because she'd be fine, and she'd stay in touch, but she had people out there she wanted to help, much like I’d helped her. I actually believed it to be the other way around…Natalie saved me.
Her parting thought. "Not a phoenix. A set of angel wings, Colton. You're an angel. You set me free." I actually sat there and cried with her holding me. When Andre walked into the kitchen, she kissed my cheek and shifted me into his strong arms.
"Take care of him. You two have a very good life waiting for you. I love you both." That was the last we saw her that day. Sometime later, she left without a word.
"Come on, Colt," Amanda reminded, drawing me from some very heartfelt memories.
"I'll be there in a sec," I told her as I zipped my laptop bag closed.
I had a few tears on my cheeks, so I dried them. Thinking about Natalie always made me into a sap. I walked out of the back room and made my way to the front of the store, seeing a very long line.
I went to the customer service desk where Lee, the new girl, was flustered with a large number of books in front of her. She was sweet but goddamn, the girl was stupid. There was a list of books we could buy back, and there was a price list, dependent upon the condition of the book. I had no fucking idea what had her so fucking upset.
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